Diaries of A Broken Man
by Horky
Summary: Between delightful ducks, flying panties, cake wielding spirits, shaved heads, exploding bananas, manskirts, and flying Wutai Stank bombs, it had never been more true than now. Love IS a battlefield.
1. A Night Out

**A/N: **So! I started another story (I'm bad like that) It's going to be a bit more happier (for the moment) than Come Together...which I'm trying to figure out how to do chapter 3...I have an idea of how I'm going to end it...I often have a problem with connecting the ending and beginning, or other pieces of the story...But I also don't want to forget this idea I came up with, so I went on ahead and started this one.

Oh yeah, before I forget, this isn't an actual diary, it's just what's going on Cloud's head(which is why it's all in italics)...I just liked that title.

_Diaries of a Broken Man_

_A Night Out_

_She said yes. She smiled that beautiful smile and said yes...I can barely believe it. After everything I've done to this woman, she looks up at me and smiles yes. I'll have to thank Denzel and Marlene later. Those two little rascals know us better than we know ourselves. _

_We enjoy a picnic together, her laughter is a melody to my ear. She lays back on the ground, stretching out on the blanket, watching the stars. I could spend a lifetime like this, just watching her. Her hair is spread out behind her, like a fan, and her ruby eyes catch mine for a second. _

_Oh how I love those eyes._

_However, we've soon eaten all we can eat, and we've rested for a while, talking of old times._

_She misses traveling too, with all our friends. _

"_We'll have to get everyone together again." She says, smiling._

_I can only nod in response. I would like to see everyone again, but for right now, it's enough just to have her here with me. _

"_It's getting late, we should probably head back soon. Knowing Yuffie, she's probably fallen asleep...I can only imagine what those two will do to her." She says, flashing another smile._

_I nod in response._

_I stand slowly, reluctant to end this, but knowing I have to. Tifa packs everything up, and I ready Fenrir. She climbs on after me, wrapping her arms around my waist instinctively. I jump, caught off guard. She reaches back, realizing what she's done. But I grab her hands, letting her know it's okay. I can practically feel her smile._

_We take off, slower than I normally would, because she's got her arms around me, and her head is resting on my back._

**A/N:** Oh yeah, these will probably be short chapters, that's just the way the style will probably be! PEACE!


	2. No Bloody Idea

**A/N: **woo! Another chapter...course, these are rather short! A plot will be picking up soon, I promise! Thanks for reviews! You guys are my audience, and it pleases me to know you're happy!

_No Bloody Idea_

_My shoulder is stiff when I wake, and I try to remember why. I wince, moving slowly. Why does my bed feel so hard?_

_...Wait..._

"_Cloud?" Tifa's voice is above me, worried._

_I can feel a cold towel pressed to my head, and I remember what happened. _

"_Stupid light bulb." I say, sitting up slowly._

_I can hear Tifa muffle a laugh, as I open my eyes. She hides her smile behind her hand, her eyes still full of laughter. Moving her hand away, she puts on a straight face._

"_So you're okay?" She asks._

_I nod once, my head throbbing. I look towards the stairs, where I'd been trying to change the light bulb. I'd lost my balance and fell down the stairs. I look about me now, sitting up on the landing, Tifa sitting on her knees beside me. Her smile shows now that she sees I'm okay._

"_Good thing Denzel isn't here to see his hero get taken down by an evil light bulb." She says, waving the light bulb around in her right hand._

"_I'm so glad it didn't get broken." I mock her, and her grin gets bigger._

"_It's the dead one anyways, you managed to get it changed before you took that fall, grace."_

_I look away, annoyed._

_She looks at me, concern in her eyes._

"_But you are okay, right?" She asks, touching my forehead lightly._

_A shiver runs up my spine, and I slowly turn my eyes to look at her._

"_Yep, that's going to swell up." She says, to herself more than me._

_She gently dabs the towel against my forehead, and I can feel my cheeks burning, as she leans in closer._

_She has no bloody idea what she's doing to me._


	3. Good Ol' Maps

**A/N: **Hello all! Another quick chapter I pulled up...I have to say I think this one is adorable...but yeah. Thanks for the reviews! And special thanks to Amaranthos for telling me about the anom. review thing...and don't worry, I've found myself reading Vincent and Tifa fanfics even though I am obviously in love with Cloud and Tifa being in love...oh, and one thing about the last one I forgot to say...I just think it's great to imagine Cloud saying bloody, even if it's in his mind...that's all...

_Good Ol' Maps._

_I've always managed to keep a cool exterior to most people. I like to think I appear calm, and emotionless. It's harder to read someone in a battle when they're like that...so, I think I just got stuck in that mode._

_However, they're people who make me show my emotions more than I use to, one in particular. They've helped me open up more, because they care about me...which is kinda surprising after all I've done...especially to her, and yet she's still the most loyal of all of my friends. _

_I think it's also because there is no longer any immediate danger. I can say I believe this, as I sit at a table in the bar with my maps spread out before me. _

_The bar is closed for the night, and I'm watching Tifa lean over Marlene's shoulder, trying to help her with some homework. Denzel watches, curious. I can tell he's having the same problem as well, although he doesn't have the heart to ask for help. I should talk to him about that. _

_Marlene asks a question, and Tifa nods her head yes, Marlene's face brightening with joy at getting her question right. Tifa returns her smile and Marlene goes back to work, Denzel throwing in a smile of his own._

_I can feel a smile growing on my lips as I watch her. She seems so...well...motherly. She ruffles Denzel's hair, and straigtens from her hunched position, stretching her arms about her head. I smile as she sighs, her arms brushing back down against her sides._

_Tifa glances up, her eyes catching mine, and she sends me a smile. I can feel the blush creeping up my neck, so I turn quickly back to my maps._

_My maps...my good ol' maps...they're stable and never changing, and they will always be here..._

_...wait...so will she..._

_...I just described her as my maps..._

_...damn..._

_She'd murder me if she ever found out I compared her to my maps..._

_...great...n__ow I'll never be able to look at them without thinking of her...well, not that I ever **stop** thinking of her..._

_...at least they don't make me blush like she does._


	4. The Shower Incident

**A/N: **All you need to know is that this was inspired by me chopping open the back of my legs in the shower...now that is pain...man, I had way too much fun writing this one...I had to post it as soon as I came up with it! XD

_The Shower Incident_

_It isn't the first time I've been in the bathroom while Tifa was in there, yet somehow, it feels much, much different. _

_I'm running late this morning, my alarm clock didn't go off...I suspect Denzel or Marlene had something to do with this._

_Of course, now I have to ask Tifa it's okay if I can be in the bathroom with her. She smiles, (is that a hint of a blush?) And agrees._

_She goes in first, and gets situated behind the shower curtain, and gives the okay call. I walk in cautiously, my eyes immediately going to the shower. The curtain is pulled shut, but if I lean over, I can see her feet below the curtain._

_...wait..._

_...why am I leaning over?_

_Blushing, I turn, picking up my toothbrush, beginning the grueling task of getting ready. The bathroom mirror keeps steaming up, so I have to pause to wipe it away every now and then. I reach up, feeling my chin, I need to shave, badly._

_As I'm reaching up to make my first stroke with my razor, I hear Tifa 'tut.' That's right, 'tut'...I have no clue what this 'tut' means. I shrug, placing the razor to my cheek, bringing it down. _

_A loud hiss erupts from Tifa's mouth, and I twitch. _

_Oh man, that stings!_

_I see the blood mingle with my shaving cream, and I sigh. I've got a long cut going down the side of my face._

_What could she possibly be doing to get hurt, I think, bringing my razor up to my other cheek, hoping this side will bring me more luck._

_...hurt..._

_...she's hurt?_

_Another 'tut' confirms my fears, and my razor slips again, giving me a matching cut on my other cheek, but I don't care._

_I drop to the floor immediately, studying Tifa's feet. She hisses again, her toes scrunching up, and that's when I see it._

_She turns away, so I'm looking at her ankles, and there's a pinkish tint to the water running down the back of her legs._

_Blood._

_...granted, very watered out, seemingly minuscule **amount **of blood, but that doesn't stop me._

_I reach out before I've even thought about it, jerking back the curtain._

"_Are you okay?"_

_Thank God that she's turned around, and thank God her hair's grown back out again...or else I would be dead now. _

_I see what's cause the pain, bloody nicks on the back of her knees, and a razor cluctched in her left hand. _

_But it's the eyes._

_I need to run, now._

_But I'm frozen to the spot, I know my face is bleeding, and my mouth is open, and I know I'm staring, and she's staring, still in shock (once again, thank you God), but she's just so beautiful. Her hair is gleaming with water, and her lithe body is shimmering in the light. _

_It's then I notice her cheeks are burning, and she lets out this noise that could be associated with a dog whistle, only I can hear it._

_An instant later the curtain has shut, and it sinks in with what I've done. I swallow, then watch as her hand tries to grab my neck through the curtain._

"_Uh...sorry...I thought you were hurt." I hear myself mumble meekly._

"_**CLOUD STRIFE**." Her words are way to annunciated for my liking._

_Forget the shave...I don't need one today._


	5. Shopping Trip

**A/N: **just something short and sweet...don't have much to say about this one...enjoy! and as always thanks for everything!

_Shopping Trip_

_It'd been a while since I'd gone shopping with Tifa and the kids, let alone been out with them. It sounded like a nice change of events, and I think it's safe...it's been a while since the 'shower' incident. The marks on my cheeks have faded, and she's let it go, although those looks for a while could freeze ice._

_I could never answer Denzel and Marlene's question about my strange shaving job that day._

_So, there we were, strolling down the streets, with Marlene and Denzel hoping about in front of us._

"_Candy store?" Marlene asks, puppy dog face in place._

_Tifa sighs, "I guess, it's been a while." She hands over a couple gil to each of them._

"_Only this much?" Denzel exclaims._

"_Would you rather have none?" Tifa asks, tilting her head._

"_Thanks!" Denzel and Marlene shouted at the same time._

_I smiled slightly as the two dashed off, Tifa chuckling lightly. _

"_Works every time." She says smiling._

_Her eyes find me, "See what you've been missing?"_

_We shop around for a bit more, stopping to get some food. I carry the groceries stacked up in my arms. I refuse to allow Tifa to carry any, and she smiles at me, baffled._

"_You know, I am the one who usually carries those."_

"_Well, consider it my job now."_

"_You shouldn't have to work on your day off."_

"_It's not working."_

_She smiles at me, and I feel a blush threatening._

"_So, when will Marlene and Denzel come back?"_

"_Oh, I imagine they'll be running up sometime soon." She replies, glancing into the windows of the stores._

"_Oh! Look at this!"_

_Tifa runs over to the window, her fingers pressed up against the glass._

_She looks so cute doing that._

_I swallow, feeling the blush rise._

"_Ne, Cloud, look at this!" She shouts, waving me over._

_I step over standing beside her hunched up form. It's a jewelry shop. In the window, there's a string of pearls on display._

"_Gah, I love pearls." She says, her face glowing._

_I glance at the price, so does she._

"_Meh, can't afford that though...ah well, it was nice to look at." She says, frowning slightly._

"_Well...ya know Teef...-_

"_Tifa! Cloud!" I look up. Denzel and Marlene are running up, a small bag of candy in each of their fists. _

"_Alright, hand it over. One piece each for now." _

_The kids comply, each taking out a sucker, and Tifa takes the bags. I almost tell her to hand them over, but she looks at me and smiles._

"_I think I can handle this much."_

_She begins to usher the kids forward. It's time to go home now. I take a quick glance at the window, calculating in my head, a small smile forming on my lips. _

"_Cloud!" Tifa shouts._

_I look up, startled. She grinning at me, and I start to follow, knowing well that my blush could be visible to a blind person._

**A/N: **Yeah, don't ask me about Tifa's expressions 'gah' and 'meh'...that's all!


	6. A Secret, Huh?

_A Secret, Huh?_

_Yuffie's staring me down, glaring at me from the other side of the bar I'm cleaning away at. I meet her gaze, challenging her._

"_Why are you here?" I ask, blatantly._

_She glares at me, her eyes narrowed. I know why she's here of course, I just can't pass up an opportunity to annoy her though. It's just too easy sometimes._

"_Why are **you** here? Shouldn't you be out delivering things?" She says, sipping her drink._

_My expression doesn't change, "Sorry, I like to help Tifa out when I say I'm going to, not sit at the bar and sip the product I'm suppose to be selling."_

_She glares at me, "You know I'd be helping, but apparently you're all she needs."_

_I can't help but narrow my eyes slightly in thought._

_Was that suppose to be meant as 'help around the bar only', or 'all she'll ever need.' I mean, if she'd just meant around the bar, she could've said something like, 'you're all the **help** she needs.' Or maybe I'm just over analyzing this too much._

_I look back up at her, there's a look of triumph on her face. I slightly begin to wonder if she can read minds._

"_You know," She starts, "That day is coming up soon."_

"_I know." I say._

"_Well?" She asks expectantly._

"_Well what?"_

_She scoffs, "Honestly Cloud, you can't actually expect me to believe the naive act, do ya?"_

"_What act?"_

_Her hand slaps the table._

"_Just **tell** me! If not, I'll go find it myself."_

"_You don't know where it is, whatever **it** is, and besides, don't you mean steal?"_

_Yuffie narrows her eyes at me. "Don't play stupid with me, Cloud Strife."_

_This is fun, messing with Yuffie's head._

"_Listen to me, you little sword wielding maniac, I **will** find out...and if I find out on my own...let's just say it won't be a secret anymore."_

_She pauses a moment._

_"It better be enough to make up for that 'shower' incident." she says, eyes staring off in the distance._

_I narrow my eyes, they just won't let that go._

_"Okay, you little hot-headed ninja," An appropriate scoff comes from her._

"_I dare you."_

"_Dare her what?"_

_Yuffie and I both jump, startled by Tifa's sudden appearance._

"_T-Ti-Tifa!" Yuffie stutters._

"_Teef..." I am so glad I'm not the only one flustered at this moment._

_She looks from me to Yuffie, then back to me. She waves her arm at us in a dismissal._

"_Just forget it, I don't even want to know." She states, walking back off._

_Yuffie lets out a sigh of relief._

"_It wouldn't be a secret anymore, huh?"_

_I see Yuffie's face fall, her jaw open in shock...then..._

_If looks could kill..._

_For a moment I regret it, her eyes are icy cold, a dead stare._

_But I can't keep the corner of my mouth from twitching slightly, threatening a smile. She stands, taking my rag and tosses it in my face. For a second, I wonder if I pushed it._

_Nah, she'll get over it...it was worth that look of shock._

**A/N: **Poor Cloud! I just can't let go of that shower incident. I've always liked to think that Cloud and Yuffie would pick on each other, sort of in a brotherly/sister manner...As always, thanks for everything! and special thanks to Rend, who just got done with "A Time For Love" and left a a very kind review...thanks! I am updating this one like crazy, and sort of abandoning Come Together, but this one is easy to write...I lurve it, and the chapters are short, which makes it easier...so hopefully I'll have a stroke of genius soon and stop leaving ya hanging on Come Together!


	7. Yellow Roses

_Yellow Roses_

_It's that day, and Tifa wakes slowly, I know she is reluctant to get out of bed. I already told her last night that I had to leave early this morning for a special package. _

_She nods her head, saying she understands._

_After all, it is **that** day._

_I feel bad though, I have been taking on extra jobs lately. On more than one occasion I've fallen asleep at my table of...maps..._

_...stupid maps..._

_But every time she'll wake me, even though she knows she can't get me up the stairs. She'll lead me over to the couch with a significant amount of pulling and coaxing. Then, she gets me to sit down, although, I rather think I fall down, but still. By the time she's returned with a blanket for me, I'm asleep._

_I like waking up those mornings, and seeing her asleep across from me. I don't like, however, that she sleeps in the chair with no blanket. Something tells me she never really means to fall asleep. That's when I carry her upstairs to her bed, grateful that she's a heavy sleeper._

_It gets harder and harder to leave her like that on those mornings._

_But this morning I'm already gone when she get's up after a night of sleeping in her chair. I just want to get everything over with and done early._

_As I race across an empty field, the sun breaking the horizon, I can't help but let my mouth twitch slightly, hinting a smile._

_I know she's getting up now, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and stretching the full length of her body; it's her morning routine. Right about now she's heading out of her door, she'll brush her teeth first, she hates morning breath. I know she's walking downstairs right now, and I don't regret anything I've done, except for one thing._

_I wish I could've seen her face when she saw that vase of 50 yellow roses on the bar this morning._

**A/N: **I know this is INCREDIBLY short...I just like leaving cliff hangers, and as a I stated when I first started this, these will be short chapters (I will be continuing this chapter soon though, and it'll be extra long, PROMISE) I looked up what roses mean and colors and what not, and yellow means "I care" and while I _love_ yellow roses (obviously, I've mentioned them in every one of my stories) I thought this needed a bit more, so 50 roses means "I love you" although, I'm pretty sure Tifa doesn't know this, but I'm sure Cloud did his research...or at least I made him XD


	8. Valentine's Day

_Valentine's Day_

_It's late when I get back, later than what I had planned on being back. The stars are out, a full moon, and I'm frustrated with how the day's gone. Sure, I understand that everyone is in love on this day, I understand that everyone wants those special gifts delivered._

_Trust me, I of all people know this..._

_But still, I'm stuck out here, trying to get home so I can see..._

_...well..._

_I just want to get home, okay?_

_That's when I see the city coming up, the familiar streets and surroundings, and I let out a sigh of relief._

_...Home..._

_There's a light on in the bar, a few customers trickling out at the end of night. Tifa leaves the bar open late on this day, for couples who want to go out, and those who want a bit of drink to forget that they had no one._

_She's ushering out the last of the customers as I park Fenrir. I see her eyes acknowledge my presence for a moment, but there away again..._

_...a blush..._

_...a blush from **her**..._

_I don't think I've ever been this happy in my life, I can't keep the grin off my face as I climb off of Fenrir, keeping my back to her. I hear her go back inside, and I smile to myself. It's time to get to work._

_She's sniffing one of the roses as I edge my way in silently, a content smile on her face, a face that's blushing._

_I avert my eyes to the floor, and shut the door loudly, to look as though I haven't seen any of this. My eyes come up, and it shocks me how fast she can move. Her back is to me and she's washing dishes._

_I smile again._

_I hide it though as I walk up to the bar, slipping my gloves off. She turns, and smiles at me._

"_Welcome home." She states._

_All thought of not smiling leaves me, and I smile again. She watches me as I reach up, touching one of the yellow roses in the vase. I wonder if she realizes it was the one she was sniffing._

"_Where'd you get the roses from?" I ask, trying to keep a straight face._

_She glares at me._

"_And just when I was about to thank you for them."_

_She turns swiftly. I had an idea something like this may happen._

"_Guess it's from a mystery man..." I state softly, and I know she's smiling, because I know she knows it was me._

"_Well...I don't know if I'll give you my present now...I mean, since someone obviously cares for you." I say, nonchalantly._

_I can see her freeze up as I lean back against the bar. She turns slowly._

"_What?"_

"_Well, I did have something for you, but, it seems to me I might make someone upset if I give you my gift."_

"_Wait!" She cries, eyes wide. _

_I feel the corner of my mouth twitch._

_Damn my twitchy mouth._

_She scoffs at me, and then narrows her eyes, knowing I'm just trying to mess with her head._

"_You...you...you..." She's working out a perfect insult for me, I can see it in her eyes._

_Things haven't gone according to plan, but I know now's the time. I waste no time reaching into my back pocket and bringing out the small, thin box. Tifa gasps, all thoughts of insulting me gone._

"_I bet I could take him, anyways." I say._

_She reaches out, touching the box lightly. She unhooks the latch and gasps. It's that string of pearls she saw in the window a couple months back. She holds them up, her mouth in a forever 'O' shape._

_It's now I turn, walking around to her side of the bar as she still stares in a amazement at the necklace._

"_I can't believe...you remembered! I can't believe you bought it! And for...for me! The price Cloud!"_

_She drops her voice low for her next sentence, "The **price**. You really shouldn't have." _

_But that doesn't wipe the smile off her face that's formed._

_She hasn't even noticed I've moved, so she jumps when she feels my hands brush her hair off her shoulders lightly, holding it back. I take the necklace with my other hand, and I can see she's holding her breath. She reaches up grabbing her hair, and I thank her lightly as I latch the pearls around her neck. _

_I lean in, resting my hands on her shoulders. She's dead still, her fingers resting lightly on the pearls._

"_Happy Valentine's Day, Teef." I whisper to her ear, and pull away._

_She sighs, turning slightly to look at me. I think this is the closest we've ever been in a long time. She's looking up at me, with those big ruby colored eyes._

_I think I've told you before how much I love those eyes._

_I lean forward before I've thought about it, and just barely brush my lips up against her cheek._

_That's when I lose my nerve, my calm exterior and all the mental preparation I put into this moment comes crashing down. I feel the heat creeping up the back of my neck, and as I pull back, I swallow, knowing full well my entire face is blood red. I try to say something, but all I can do is stutter, and she's looking at me with a shocked, baffled look on her face, a face that's getting it's own red glow. I turn to go, then second guess it, stepping back, but I decide if I do anything else tonight my face will permanently be stained red. _

"_Uh..guh...uh, good...good night." I stammer, and run up the stairs. _

_I stop at the top of the stairs, frozen, second-guessing everything I've done tonight. Especially that kiss, I mean, what if it was too much? I mean, that wasn't me at all..._

_But I let out this big sigh I'm holding in when I hear her giggle happily. _

_There's a few thumps in a row and I realize she's jumping up and down. I smile, in fact, I can't keep the smile off my face. It's there as I head down stairs to plan out my maps for the next day, and it's there as I work well into the night. It gets bigger though, with my last thought before I drift asleep, just after Tifa pulls me over to the couch._

_I wonder how much crap Vincent gets on Valentine's Day?_

**A/N: **Squees with upmost delight! I know twitchy isn't a real word (my spellchecker told me this) but I can't help it, we all use fake words...and I just loved writing this...I really debated as to continuing this into the next morning in this chapter, but I decided to wait, as there has been such an amount of fluff, you could drown in it in this chapter...so, just wait till next time! and, as always, thanks for all the awesome reviews you guys have been given me and what not! you are loved! oh, and I am actually working on Come Together, **promise**. oh, and any questions regarding the progress of my stories or any new stories I'm toying with, can be found in me profile, just to let ya know!


	9. Like A Dream

_Like A Dream_

_My eyes water up as I open them in the sudden light of morning. I'm on the couch, with a blanket tucked neatly around me. I glance at the clock, it's eleven, and I wonder lightly why I'm not up. Glancing at my phone, I see it's been turned off. Seems that Tifa wanted a day off for me. I know it's one small way to thank me for her gift._

_I look over, seeing Tifa asleep in the chair, and I know now that she never means to fall asleep; the corner of my mouth twitches. _

_Her head is titled to the right a bit in sleep with her hair falling over her face, her knees curled up against her, and her breath steady...but the thing that gets me, is that she's still got a hand resting on her pearls, and the other one is lightly resting on her knee, holding a yellow rose._

_I'm cooking lunch when she wakes up in her chair. She looks around baffled, there's a blanket tucked around her. She looks over disoriented._

"_Cloud?" She asks, sleepily._

"_Morning."_

_I think it's been a while since she's slept in, which doesn't surprise me. She works just as hard as I do, if not more considering the fact she's got to wrestle with the kids._

_She stands slowly, letting the blanket fall to the floor, and it's only then she realizes she'd held a yellow rose all through the night. She blushes, resting it on the chair._

"_Denzel? Marlene?" She asks, yawning._

"_Apparently didn't have the heart to wake us this morning." I say, handing her a note._

_She nods her head as she reads it; they've gone off to play with a few friends, and would be back this evening._

"_They told me yesterday."_

_I watch her as she heads upstairs, going to brush her teeth, as I take lunch off the stove. My mouth twitches. It's not burnt, I've gotten better at cooking._

_It's then I hear her yell, and I nearly drop the pot I'm holding. Setting it roughly down, I make a dash for the stairs._

"_Teef? You okay?" I ask, moving up the stairs quickly._

_The bathroom door is cracked open slightly, and I hesitate, remembering a certain incident that happened a few months back._

"_Teef?" I say, cautiously inching the door open._

_She's fully clothed, and her eyes are wide in shock. I can tell she's just put up her toothbrush and splashed her face with water to wake her up, a towel resting in her hands. She's caught herself in the mirror, and her hand is lightly touching the pearls._

_I clear my throat, and she turns startled._

"_I thought..." she blushes, "It was a dream."_

_I swallow, already feeling the blush creeping up on my face. I don't understand though, because I actually haven't done anything to cause it for once. Does she just have that much of an affect on me?_

_Or maybe it's the reason I can already see what's going to happen, I can already see her walking up to me, and she hasn't even moved yet. I can already see it happen, so it's not that big of a surprise when she walks up to me, looking up with those big, ruby eyes and smiles._

_And kisses me._

_Right on the lips._

_Sure I knew it was coming, but nothing could prepare me for this tidal wave of emotion rushing over me. I drape my hands on her shoulders, and we stand there for a moment...kissing..._

_Yes, kissing...I am kissing Tifa Lockhart...I didn't think my gift would go over that well..._

_...oh..._

_...wait..._

_I am kissing**...Tifa...**wow...__I think the same things gone through her mind, except for about me, cause she's pulled back, and she's blood red in the face, her eyes averted on the floor._

_And then she's pushing the me out the door._

_"I want to take a shower!" She shouts._

_BAM!_

_Oh pain...pain pain pain pain pain._

_Doors and foreheads do not make good buddies, I think rubbing my forehead. _

_But despite the pain, I smile._

_I know I'm not dreaming, I just had a door slammed in my face, literally._

_I feel the pain, which means I also really felt her lips against mine._

_It's so much like a dream, but it's not._

**A/N:** ahahaha, Rend, that was like...the greatest review ever for chapter eight, just the way you worded it made me laugh...so that was Tifa's gift back to him, and I honestly had that planned out, but even if I didn't, I would've stuck that in there just for you...as always, you guys rock with the reviews and what not, and as always, I am still writing Come Together...as much as that may seem like a lie, tis not...till next time! oh, one last thing, I will not be anywhere near my computer with my stories on it till sunday...I maybe able to post a chappie tomorrow sometime, but after that, I'm going home for the weekend...so, later!


	10. Stay

_Stay_

_It's the middle of the night, and I've returned from a long day. Tifa's fallen asleep on the couch again, and I carry her upstairs, putting her to bed with a soft kiss on her cheek. She smiles lightly in her sleep, and I leave. _

_I don't bother eating or changing, I'm not even going to do my maps tonight, I'm just too tired. I strip down to my pants, falling on to my bed face first. It's only a second later I remember to click off my cell phone. I'm taking a day off tomorrow._

_When I wake, my vision is blurred, I can't even tell where I am. For some reason, I'm standing. I reach up, rubbing my eyes, blinking as I open them._

_I want to close them again, but I can't._

_It's her, and she's kneeling like she did all those years ago, kneeling and praying. I feel my voice lock up._

_Why do I have to relive this moment? Why?_

_I already know what happens, so why can't I move? Why can't I stop him?_

_It's **his** cue now, dropping from the ceiling, that malicious grin on his face. Then it pierces her stomach. _

_She's shocked, but I'm not, and I feel guilty for it._

_I don't know how many times I've had this nightmare, how many times I could've stopped him but I can't. _

_And she's falling forward, already dying, and he's gone, and I'm rushing forward, trying to catch her before she hits the floor. I catch her, blood spilling from her stomach, a waterfall onto the steps, and I stare at the back of her head, afraid to lift it up, but knowing I have to at the same time;; I tilt her chin up slowly._

_Every fiber in my entire body freezes. Breath will not come to me, and I don't even want to breathe. I don't even want to live. _

_I call out to **him**, telling **him** to come back, to kill me too._

_Because for once, it's not Aerith I'm holding..._

_It's Tifa._

_I feel my voice grow, the scream coming out when I realize he's not coming back. It goes, echoing into the night,_

_And there's hands on my shoulders, and a voice in my ear._

"_Cloud! Cloud!"_

_It's now my eyes fly open, and she's there. Living, breathing, and staring at me with worried eyes. I don't think twice and I wrap my arms around her. _

_She's alive...oh thank God, she's alive._

"_Shh, Cloud, it's okay, it's okay." _

_She's wrapped her arms around me and is holding me close. My breath steadies, and it's then I hear the door open._

"_Cloud?" Denzel asks._

"_It's okay Denzel, everything's okay..." Tifa has to leave me for a moment, leading Denzel out._

_I'm sitting up now, sorting my thoughts, racking my brain for whatever it was that could've caused that nightmare. She's back soon again, and she closes the door behind her. She walks over, standing by my bed._

"_How did you know?" I ask, studying my covers._

"_I think it was when you started yelling for **him** to come and kill you. And that scream Cloud, it could've brought down the house. But luckily Denzel and Marlene are okay now. You really scared me, are you okay?" She asks, pain in her voice._

_I nod, swallowing._

"_...I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound harsh, you just really had me frightened. What was it that was so bad that you actually wanted to him to kill you, Cloud?"_

_I can't answer, and I wince._

"_I'm sorry to have woken you up." It's all I can say._

"_Don't be sorry, and besides, you didn't wake me up."_

_I look up, surprised._

_She smiles sadly, "You're not the only one who has nightmares, Cloud."_

_I nod, understanding._

"_Do you think...we'll ever be able to sleep in peace?"_

"_I don't think we deserve to."_

_I nod in agreement._

"_But you're okay now? I'm guessing this one was different..."_

_I can only nod my head again, there's no way I could ever possibly tell her what I had just dreamt about._

"_I understand." She says, standing._

"_Good night, Cloud." _

_She's leaving...I can't let her leave, not after that._

"_Wait." I say, leaning out, grabbing her wrist._

_She turns slightly, and I avert my eyes._

"_Stay." I say softly._

"_Ok."_

_The bed dips as she sits down beside me. It's awkward at first, trying to lay down on my bed and get under the covers, but eventually we do, and she's facing me, and I'm facing her. We stare at each other a moment, and she moves her hand out, resting it on the space between us and nods her head once. _

_I reach out, lacing my fingers with her's, and stare at her._

_I don't remember which one of us closed our eyes first._

**A/N: **I think it's reasonable to assume that these two have nightmares...and while some of this is fluff, some of it needs a serious note in it too...a special thanks to Legendary Phantom Thief Taco for such awesome reviews and space-halo...I was kinda wondering what cloud + Tifa equals! and then there was no answer...heh, so as always, thanks for the awesome reviews! and see ya guys at the end of the weekend!


	11. Sick

_Sick_

_It was late when I got home that night. I'd been out for three days, working on a few deliveries that were way out there. It took me a minute to finally fit the key in the lock. I turned the key, the tumblers falling in place, and twisted the door knob._

_THWACK!_

_I did not realize the fact that I had forgotten once again to unlock the deadbolt. _

_I also remember now that the door is very unforgiving to my forehead. Rubbing my forehead, I finished unlocking the door, pushing it open fully before daring to walk through. Unfortunately, luck is not on my side tonight._

"_Marlene!"_

_I'm tripping over her, dodging to the side and ramming my side into the door knob. I wince and glare at the door for a moment._

_Haven't you abused me enough for one night? I curse it silently in my head, turning towards Marlene._

_...and Denzel apparently._

_They're staring up at me with big, wide eyes, dressed in robes and pajamas. _

"_What are you doing out of bed?" I ask, rubbing my eyes._

_I'm a walking hazard, exhaustion is really pushing me right now._

"_It's Tifa!" They shout whisper._

"_Tifa?" I ask, confused._

"_We can't get her to go to bed!" Marlene hissed._

"_What?"_

_She grabbed my hand, Denzel taking the other as they yanked me over towards the bar area. It's now I see her._

_Denzel and Marlene have done there best, slipping a pillow beneath the head that's resting on the counter top, and a blanket wrapped about arms that hang limply at her side. She looks as if she could fall from the bar stool at any moment._

_I swear softly._

"_Why isn't she in bed?" I ask, whispering._

"_She wouldn't get up!" Denzel said._

"_She had the **worst** head ache ever!" Marlene said, her eyes wide with concern._

"_A head ache?"_

"_She couldn't sleep!"_

"_Why didn't you call me?"_

"_She said she was okay!"_

"_Denzel, Marlene..."_

"_We know! But...we didn't know she wasn't sleeping until..."_

"_Until..."_

"_I had to go to the bathroom."_

"_Liar." Denzel hissed under his breath._

_Marlene threw him a menacing look._

"_We just found her tonight!_ _She was up!...well...as up as **that** is." Marlene stated, gesturing to Tifa._

_I let out a defeated sigh._

"_And she won't get up?" I ask._

"_She won't wake up! She keeps going, 'just a bit longer...' but every time we tell her that in the morning, she pulls the mattress out from 'neath us!" Denzel exclaims._

_I wince at how loud he is._

"_We figured nothing would be good about pulling the stool out from 'neath her, though." Marlene said, nodding her head wisely._

"_Yes...good choice there." I have to commend them on that one._

"_But it can't be good for her to sleep like that!" Denzel added._

_I sigh, he's right. I'm tired, but for Tifa's sake, I can make it up the stairs. Walking over, I place a hand lightly on her forehead. She's on fire. Frowning slightly, I get my hands beneath her knees, lifting her gently, as her head lolls back and rests on my shoulder. _

"_Mmph...no." She mumbles._

_Sighing, I walk delicately towards the stairs, making sure not to bang her head or feet on the walls in the stairwell. Marlene leads me, and Denzel keeps close behind me._

"_I'll catch her if you drop her Cloud." He reassures me._

_I'm prepared to walk past my room, but Marlene looks up, shocked._

"_What're you doing?" she asks hotly._

"_Putting her to bed..." I'm so confused._

"_Not her bed, silly! Yours!"_

_**How** does a child make me blush?_

"_Why mine?" I mumble._

"_Well, that's where she was sleeping the other night, when ya had that nightmare." Denzel said simply._

"_I don't think I've ever seen her that happy asleep." he adds._

"_You **spied** on us?" I ask, my arms growing heavy with weariness._

"_I had to go to the bathroom." He replies weakly._

"_Liar."_

_It's Denzel's turn to send Marlene a silencing look._

"_Fine...we'll talk about this later." I say, defeated._

_Marlene's holding her arms out so I can't maneuver past her, and plus, my room is closer. I walk in as Denzel holds the door open for me and I set her gently on the bed. Brushing stray locks from her face, I stare at her for a moment. It's then I see Marlene climb up onto my bed._

"_Whoa, Marlene." I start._

_But she reaches out, patting Tifa's forehead, "Night Tifa." She whispers._

"_Night, Tifa." Denzel does the same._

_They give a small wave before retreating to their bedrooms. I can't help but smirk lightly. Pulling off my boots, I change quickly, washing up a bit. I'm more awake now, anyways. I return to my room soon though, Tifa sleeping peacefully. I reach out, touching her forehead lightly. She's still on fire._

_I climb into bed beside her, wrapping an arm about her. She snuggles against me in her sleep and I kiss her lightly on the cheek. _

_Sure, I know I can get sick._

_But I'm willing to take that chance._

**A/N: **Do you guys realize thwack is an actual word? And thanks to rend for trying to justify the word 'twitchy'...it's enough that you tried...anyways, sorry for all teh late updates. I was home for the weekend, and now I've lost my voice b/c we went to Carowinds (which is a theme park with lots of roller coaters which is not good for my voice, b/c I am a coaster addict and tend to yell a bit) anyways! I have no idea when I'll be updating, but I'll try for ASAP...thanks for reviews!


	12. That's Not How Mom Does It

_That's Not How Mom Does It_

"_That's not how Tifa does it." Marlene states plainly._

_I've lost count of how many times I've heard that today. _

"_Well, Marlene, Tifa is sick, and I'm doing this, so this is how I do it." I say, attempting to cook them lunch._

"_Well, I don't think your way is right." Denzel adds in._

_I let out a frustrated sigh, how does she do it?_

"_Would you rather do this?" I ask._

"_Tifa would kill you if you let us use the stove unsupervised."_

"_Yep." Denzel nods his head in agreement._

"_Fine, it's done." I say, handing them both plates._

_Marlene and Denzel are silent a moment, studying their food._

"_What now?" I ask._

"_That black stuff isn't there when Tifa does it."_

_I somehow kept my mouth shut. I'm trying to rack my mind for something to say about this 'black stuff' when I see the doctor descend the stairs. I look up, but I see Denzel and Marlene have abandoned their food. They rush over to him, and he gives them a small smile._

"_Issheok? Issheok?" They ask, pulling on the front of his coat._

_He pats their heads, "She will be."_

_I sigh in relief, and Denzel and Marlene smile, and walk back to the bar._

"_She needs to rest up for the next few days though, and not do anything strenuous." He says, walking over. "That means you two will have to be extra good as to not disturb her or upset her."_

_Denzel and Marlene nod, serious looks on their faces._

_The doctor glances at the two plates of food._

"_And judging by this, you'll need to be extra good so you can help your father, too. I'm sure it's not mother's cooking, but he's doing his best." He says._

"_Fa-father?...mother?" I ask softly._

_He doesn't hear me, and he gives a little wave as he walks out._

_I swallow, feeling my cheeks burn._

_Father? Mother?...didn't he know we're not even married!_

"_Hey, **dad**..." Denzel says softly._

_I look down, cheeks still aflame._

"_That's not how mom does it!"_

**A/N:** just a short chapter, I'll be updating soon, but I thought this was cute...thanks for reviews and what not!


	13. Dudley The Delightful Duck

_Dudley The Delightful Duck_

_I'm getting them ready for bed, and they still haven't let it go. Sure, they've been helping me out, they're doing everything they can for Tifa. However, for me?_

"_Hey, dad...you gonna kiss mommy good night?" Marlene teases._

_I lead them towards their bedroom, "Yeah, say that in front of your father and we'll see what he says."_

_She grins, "Oh, he wouldn't get mad at me, just you."_

"_Really?"_

"_Of course! He can't get mad at me, plus, he'd just think you'd stole me away."_

_I grimace slightly, she's probably right about Barret thinking that._

"_Let's just get you in to bed."_

_I tuck them in, Marlene first and Denzel. I give Marlene a kiss on the cheek, and I ruffle Denzel's hair. _

"_Hey, wait!" Marlene calls out._

"_Where's our story?"_

"_...story?"_

"_You have to read us a story!" Marlene calls out, Denzel nodding knowingly._

"_...ok...which one?"_

_Marlene reaches down, pulling a book from beneath her bed. She holds it out to me._

"_Dudley the delightful duck..." I state._

"_Oh not that one! It's boring!" Denzel shouts._

"_Then it'll help you fall asleep faster." Marlene states._

"_Hmmph." Denzel crosses his arm._

"_Come on, Cloud! Read it!" _

_She's way to excited about something with a delightful duck. If anyone saw me reading this...well...judging by this book cover, Barret's probably read this many more times than I. Still..._

"_What a delightful day, Dudley says." I state, monotone._

_I can't believe I'm doing this._

_Marlene scoff's._

"_He's not even doing voices!" Marlene says, tossing her hands in the air._

"_That's not how mom-_

_It's now I hear my cell phone ringing. I sigh, saved. I've left it down in the bar._

"_I'll be back."_

_Well, saved for the moment._

_After a long call trying to debate when I could deliver again, I head back upstairs. Hopefully, Denzel and Marlene are asleep by now. I hear voices though._

"_And that's how he saved the day, his friends, and his home. The end." _

_It's Tifa's voice. She's up? She's still sick!_

_I rush towards the door, but stop just outside of it. Tifa's putting up a book, and it's not Dudley the Delightful Duck. She walks back over, giving a Marlene a kiss on the forehead, and Denzel as well. They're yawning, and rolling over, already half asleep. I step back as Tifa comes out and shuts the door lightly behind her._

_She's wearing baggy pajama bottoms and a blanket from my bed is wrapped around her. However, what catches my eye is that she's wearing one of my t-shirts. It's sleeves nearly reach her elbows, and the shirt ends at about mid-thigh. _

_She looks so cute._

"_What're you doing up?" I ask, wrapping an arm around her shoulder._

"_It was just a bedtime story, Cloud...and don't worry, I'm not contagious, so I won't get the children sick."_

"_But you weren't doing Dudley.."_

"_I know, that one's reserved for Barret." Tifa states as I lead her into my room._

_She lays down, and I can tell she's been worn out just by doing that little. _

"_Besides," She says as she flops down, "I figured you could use a break from the two...they can be a handful, especially when you don't do anything the right way."_

_I blush, but I see a teasing smile play her lips as she snuggles down beneath the blankets. I turn to leave._

"_Where are ya going?" she asks._

"_I still have some things to clean up." I state._

_I can tell she doesn't want me to go. I know Tifa hates being in bed, and she hates being helpless, but even more than that, she hates being alone. I sigh slightly, I don't really mind. I walk over, laying down on the bed. She throws the covers over me, and slides over to my chest. I marvel a moment at how well she fits me as she snuggles her head into my shoulder, falling asleep as she does so._

"_Good night Teef." I whisper, kissing her softly on the forehead._

_She smiles in her sleep._

**A/N: **heh...dudley...hehe...just a continuation of Tifa's sickness...I have to say, I've never read Dudley the Delightful Duck, and I doubt it's even been written...if it has, then, well...oh well...I couldn't think of any childhood stories of mine, so I made one up...enjoy! thanks for all the awesome reviews!


	14. Operation Denied

_Operation Denied_

_I can't believe my luck. I'm actually going to get home early for once. It's only seven. I park Fenrir, and I turn towards Seventh Heaven, noticing something unusual. _

_The bar is closed._

_I swallow, fear billowing up from the pit of my stomach. Tifa had went back to the doctor's a few days ago, she'd seemed subdued when she came home, but she was better...she wasn't sick again, was she? Had something happened?_

_Or was it one of the kids?_

_I shake my head, trying to bury this feeling. Someone would've called if anything happened._

_My efforts to quail my fear aren't working, and I quickly unlocked the door, deadbolt included (haha! Take that you fiend!)._

_What I find shocks me._

_Denzel and Marlene are cleaning, and I mean **cleaning**._

_Marlene is attempting to mop, but the mop is too tall for her. Denzel is bringing in blankets and cushions, blankets and cushions he's just beat the dust off of. There's a bit of grime in his hair, and black marks streaking their faces, evidence of cleaning the fire place._

_I can't remember the last time they were doing this._

_Oh wait, I can...that was when they put their new friend Henrietta the mouse and her two babies in Tifa's bed...yeah...I remember that one. What a scream..._

_But back to the present, _

"_What did you **do**?" Even I, master of emotion concealing, cannot keep the incredulous tone out of my words._

_Marlene and Denzel look up, their eyes big, screaming save us._

"_IF YOU SAY ONE WORD..." _

_Oh man...I should just turn around now and go._

_Tifa's coming down the stairs, her arms crossed, and practically breathing anger, humiliation, and all other negative emotions. They radiate off of her like an ill-conceived bubble of emotions._

_I flinch._

"_They can't say anything, so don't talk to them."_

"_Teef..." I try to calm her._

"_NO! No Teef, not today...they're being punished for their crimes. I won't hear it!"_

_And with that, she turns, strolling up the stairs, her head held high. _

_After hearing the door slam, I motion to the two children, and a small smile breaks their faces. They rush over, quietly sitting down mop and blankets._

"_...how..."I whisper._

"_We were just trying to make the annoying man go away..." Marlene states, her voice soft._

_I raise an eyebrow in question._

"_He kept asking her stuff..."_

"_Stuff?"_

"_Yeah, stuff...like, whatcha doin Saturday night, sweetums?" Denzel makes a face._

_I feel my face grow hot in anger, "Someone **asked** her that?"_

_Denzel shakes his head furiously._

"_But we don't want her to go out with anyone but you Cloud..." Marlene states plainly._

_Now my face is hot in embarrassment._

"_Still...she should be happy you're trying to get her out of a date, right?" I whisper._

"_Well..." Denzel starts._

_I put my face in my hand, "What did you do?"_

"_Well...we went to the laundry room and got some things."_

"_Like what?"_

"_Just wait...well...we came back out carrying it in a laundry basket, and we had it covered up with a sheet...and...well, we said, if you want to see Tifa's under-things-_

"_WHOA..."I have to restrain my voice._

"_Why did you think that...he wanted..." I clear my throat._

"_Remember that one time when you had to go buy a new door?" Denzel starts._

"_Cause of that one guy? You know, Tifa kicked him through the door after she hit him with the chair..."_

"_Ohhh yeah, that one..." I shudder._

"_Yeah, **that **one...well, that's what he asked about, so we figured maybe that's what this guy would ask about..." Marlene says._

"_So...?"_

"_So...we said that this was the only way you'd get to see them." Denzel states._

_Oh...no... "What was in the basket?"_

"_Well...it was one of Tifa's woman thingys, and do you know how well those make slingshots?" Denzel asks._

_I choke...they used...Tifa's bra...as a slingshot? _

"_What was ammo?" Did my voice just squeak?_

"_Well..." Marlene's eyes trail off to the corner._

_It's then I see it, the basket of clothing. I find myself blushing at it's contents. Tifa's panties have been rolled up into balls, and I have no doubt in my mind what they used for ammo._

"_I can't believe you did that...and you survived...and let me get something straight...you did this while the bar was open?" I ask._

"_He was a **regular**, Cloud! He's always asking! And after that, he's never, **ever**, coming back."_

"_But did you have to do **that**? I mean, that was Tifa you embarrassed there."_

"_Trust us Cloud, this was plan Z for our operation."_

"_Operation, what operation?"_

_Denzel leans in, but it's now we hear Tifa's footsteps on the stairs. The color drains from Denzel and Marlene's faces as they see her descend._

"_Bedroom, now." _

_And the two take off, shying away from her._

_Tifa meets my eyes, and I know she'd been listening._

_I know she wants me to say something, but what am I suppose to say? I'm afraid of that look she's giving me, but still! How was I suppose to be prepared for the day when Denzel and Marlene would attack a customer with flying panties?_

"_So...um..." I feel my face heat up._

"_It was operation denied if you wanted to know." She states._

_I walk over, feeling the corner of my mouth twitch._

"_Cloud Strife." She says as a warning as I approach._

_I do the only thing I can think of._

_I kiss her._

_I break the kiss, knowing I've caught her off guard, and lean into her ear._

"_Remind me to thank them later." I state._

_I see her smile out of the corner of my eye as she wraps her arms around my neck._

"_We'll thank them together."_

**A/N: **whew! I don't think I've had that much fun since the shower incident...poor Tifa, I just have too much fun embarassing her...and I don't know what was the inspiration of Denzel and Marlene slingshotting underwear at some poor customer who just wanted a date...I mean, after all, it's better than deal with Cloud, eh?

Anyways! Thanks for awesome reviews as always! And I'll try to be updating everything soon! Lurve ya!


	15. One Short Lived Victory

_One Short Lived Victory_

_So we do thank them, by Tifa attempting to cook with them. And what's she cooking? A cake._

_We all should've known this wouldn't have gone over well._

_...at all..._

_I myself have never been the best of cooks, as Denzel and Marlene have reminded me one too many times. Tifa, however, is a cooking goddess. I don't understand how she does it. It's gotten to the point where she doesn't even take measurements, she just pours._

_That use to scare me before I realized she knew what she was doing._

_But this...this is scarier._

_At this moment, Denzel is holding an egg in both hands, Marlene perched precariously on a stool stirring batter. Denzel has no experience in the kitchen what so ever, though Marlene has a bit. Still, Tifa is scrambling between the two, and I lightly wonder if even the cooking goddess Tifa can handle this one._

_Splat!_

_Nope, seems not._

_Denzel has dropped the egg. He's looking up at me and Tifa, surprised._

"_Denzel!"_

_He mumbles sheepishly, "I thought it didn't break until you wanted it too."_

_I feel my mouth twitch, but luckily Denzel is looking down. Tifa places a hand on his shoulder, smiling._

"_It's okay sweetie." She lifts him up beneath the arms, and sits on the counter top. He's embarrassed, this is a feat he feels he could've accomplished himself. I catch Tifa smiling at him, but something catches my eye. It looks like she's in pain, her lips pressed tightly together. I notice a hand on her shoulder. _

_There's no way she could've hurt herself lifting Denzel up, right?_

_But then she's away again, acting normal. I shrug inwardly, trying to convince myself I'd just saw something that didn't happen. _

_Denzel is leaning over the bowl, Tifa has her hands over his and she's cracking the egg gently. She helps him drop the yolk in without the shell falling, and Marlene giggles._

_And I see why._

_She's stuck her finger in the batter and has smeared a long line down Denzel's nose. He's gaping in shock._

"_That's for putting the frog in my bed." She states._

"_You put a **frog** in her bed! When!" Tifa cries out._

_But it's too late._

_Denzel has dug his hand into the batter and scooped out a sizable amount. He tosses it at Marlene, Marlene ducks...and...Tifa..._

_...well, as I said before, I knew this couldn't end well._

_I begin to wonder if Tifa could reach an anger level surpassing the 'flying panties'._

_She sits in silence a moment, wiping the batter from her face with everyone frozen and afraid to move._

_Then faster than I thought possible, there's a glob of batter in Denzel's face, another in Marlene's, and Tifa's taken off with the bowl._

_This is not good._

_Denzel and Marlene are shocked, but recover quickly, seeing Tifa's target. _

_Me._

_I run for the stairs, but she cuts me off._

_I back up quickly, tripping over a chair, never turning my back. It discourages me slightly that Denzel and Marlene are rooting for Tifa. Only slightly though._

_I've almost made it to the door._

"_Oh no, Cloud Strife! If I suffer, you suffer!" She shouts, triumph in her voice._

_She hurled the bowl at me._

_Tifa just threw a **bowl** at me, and not just any bowl, but a bowl full of cake batter._

_She threw a bloody bowl at me!_

_Well, I mean, I know it won't hurt me, I know I can dodge it, but still! Who throws bowls?_

_I hear it thwack against the door as I raise back up, I can't keep from smiling slightly at my victory._

_But then I see Tifa's eyes for just a split second._

_The reason I only see them for a split second is because of the batter slapping against my face obscuring my vision. I see now she'd taken a handful out of the bowl before chucking it at me. Oh, she's good, very good._

_She's smiling at me, still laughing, and Denzel and Marlene are rolling on the floor with laughter. _

"_What...what about the cake?" Denzel breathes between laughs._

"_We'll make another one!" Marlene concludes._

"_Chocolate this time!" _

_I see Tifa give a defeated sigh as I walk over._

"_What?" She asks, seeing my perplexed look._

"_You act like you were the one that lost." I say plainly._

"_Well, don't think I didn't see that look of victory in your eyes, Mr. Strife." She says, poking my chest once. _

_I reach up, swiping my hand across my face in an effort to hide my blush, disguising it as cleaning my face till I gain my composure. I look down at her, my blush receded._

_She reaches up, smearing a hand across my face, laughing._

"_Missed a spot." She says walking away, the blush creeping back up my face._

_Man...that was one short lived victory._

**A/N: **Eghad! It's been a while, no? I've been busy and haven't had much time for writing. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! That line about Denzel with the egg, it's a quote from my sister...she did that once when we were little. Anyways! Did you get the little thing about Cloud's short lived victory? yes one for the batter (That's obvious) but the other for the blush. He just can't keep his face a normal color when Tifa's around...ah well, till next time! And as always, thanks for awesome reviews!


	16. How Much Is Enough?

_How Much Is Enough?_

_I was home late again that night. I'd been out on another long trip, gone for about a week. I hate those trips. I hate being away from Tifa and the children for so long, but they bring in good money, and that always helps._

_I haven't been this tired in a long time. I think it's time for another day off._

_I frown as I enter, Tifa's no where in sight. Sure, I don't like her waiting up and falling asleep on the couch, it's not good for her, but still...she's normally here. I shrug, she probably went to bed early. I check on the children first, they're both peacefully sleeping._

_I go and take a shower, washing the gas fumes, dirt, and a collection of unknown stains off of me. _

_My mouth twitches as I heat up my supper, I'm glad to have Tifa's cooking back. I had received a few meals from the people I delivered to. They paled in comparison to even Tifa's packed meals, which were days old and slightly smushed. After scarfing down my supper, I head upstairs, full and clean, ready for bed. I pause at Tifa's door, though. I should check on her. _

_Opening it slightly, I peak in._

_She's not there._

_Oh...oh no..._

_I rush to my room._

_Not there._

_My heart is thumping wildly in my chest, and my eyes dart around, searching for any sign of her. I rush back to her room, and it's then I notice the open window. Walking swiftly to the window, I lean out. I notice the drain pipe on the left, and looking up, I see the corner of some fabric hanging from the roof. I swing out gently, getting my footing, using the pipe to climb up. I sigh in relief._

_She's spread a blanket out on the roof, and fallen asleep looking at the stars. I pull myself up, gazing at her. She's beautiful._

_She's rolled onto her side in her sleep, and I slide softly across the roof, brushing her hair back from her face. I watch her._

_I can tell she's dreaming, her eyes darting back and forth behind her eyelids. I frown slightly, watching as her fists twitch, her leg jerks, and she digs her fingernails into her palms. A tear escapes her sleeping eyes, and I feel awful. She's having a night mare._

_I roll her over and pull her into my arms, she doesn't wake. She seems to calm in my arms, her fists unclenching, her eyes resting now. She snuggles her nose into my chest and breathes out a word._

"_Cloud."_

_It's so soft I doubt I really even heard it for a second. She gives a content sigh, sinking deeper into sleep. It's in this moment I recall the kiss we shared the morning after Valentine's Day._

_I'd been so shocked that I hadn't even considered what I felt. It was just enough to kiss her. Never mind the fact that my lips burned for the rest of the day, the edges of them tingling every now and then. Never mind the fact that my heart beat jumped, skipped, and stopped all at the same time it seemed. Never mind the warmth that spread through my chest, lighting fire to my senses and bringing me into a new kind of comfort. Every single minuscule sound I heard, and at the same time, I didn't hear. I was lost in her lips, there was only her and I, and yet, I knew everything that was happening around me. I could hear the faucet drip, I could hear the cars go by outside, children laughing, a dog barking, and yet, I had no real perception of them. In my mind, even though I knew they were there, they did not truly exist. Only myself, and one other thing existed. The most important person in my life existed with me. In that single, solitary moment, it was enough._

_Sure, it's enough right now, I think to myself as I lean over, kissing her temple, then her ear, her cheek, and finally her neck. She breathes into my shoulder, burying herself deeper in my arms. I feel my cheeks flush, heat spreading across my body._

_Yes, this is enough for right now, just to hold her as she sleeps, to make the nightmares evanesce for the time being, to protect her as she dreams._

_I know I'll always be happy doing these things, that these small gestures can bring me happiness. I'll never take them for granted, nor will I ever take her for granted again._

_I guess the thing I'm trying to get at, is how much longer until this stops being enough? How much longer till I'll have to have more? Till I'll need more?_

_This now, this won't be satisfactory soon. I'll need more...I know that, I'll have to have more, until it's enough. And yet, the biggest question has to be answered, let alone asked._

_How much will I need?_

_And how much is enough?_

**A/N: **And Cloud contemplates...kinda deep for mr. chocobo head, eh? Ah well, I've been so busy these past couple days...sorry! But I'm very pleased with this chapter, me loves it! Anyways, thanks for all the reviews, and a mariage proposal...haha! I'm sad to see a reviewer go for the time being, but I know they'll be back when they can. Anyways, trying to write, promise, and as always, posting as soon as I can!


	17. When Will They Stop?

_When Will They Stop?_

_Damn, my head hurts._

_Ah, light! Do I have a hangover?_

"_He's opening his eyes."_

_Must you be so loud, unknown voice?_

_I squint my eyes, opening them slowly. Everything is hazy, but I can make out Barret sitting beside of the bed I'm on. Cid is leaning against the wall behind him, and I don't have a clue where I am. I try to ask them where we are, but I can't move. I can't move my arms, my legs, nothing._

_I feel myself panic._

_All this does is make me breathe quicker._

"_It's okay Cloud. Just calm down." Barret says softly._

_What's with him? He sounds so subdued. Where am I? And what the hell happened?_

_I can't remember what was the last thing that happened. _

"_I'll tell the others." Cid states, walking out._

_Barret nods once as Cid walks out, his head dropping back down._

_Barret! What's going on? _

_Man I wish he could read minds._

_Wait...no, I don't._

_Speaking of mind-reading, where's Tifa? Shouldn't she be here? She's always there when I wake up. Well, not always, but when I'm sick or hurt she is._

_What the hell is wrong with me? I can't move, I can't remember anything that's happened, and I have no bloody clue where I am right now. _

_Someone's coming through the door now...Tifa?_

_No...who is he?_

_There's a man, I don't care who he is. Where's Tifa?_

"_He's suffering from severe mako poisoning."_

_Don't talk so loud! My head is killing me._

"_Will he be okay?"_

"_I can't really say, he shouldn't even be alive in my opinion." The man replies._

"_Maybe it's for the best." Barret states._

_The man frowns. "Why is that?"_

"_Doctor." It's Vincent._

_Vincent? What the hell?_

_The man nods, and leaves._

"_It is for the best right? He'd be like this, or even worse if possible if he knew." Barret says._

"_Barret." _

"_I should've been the first one in. If it'd been me, I'd be the one dead, not her."_

_Wait...what?_

"_Shinra...those sick sons of bitches. I hate them all!" Barret growls, his hand balling into a fist._

"_It isn't your fault."_

"_It is. I could've done something else, something more. I could've at least stalled them! Anything! At least...at least they don't have her body." Barret finishes._

_Body? Her body?..._

"_He might understand Barret, you have to tell him."_

"_No." Barret says, a bitter tinge in his voice._

"_I will."_

"_You can't!"_

"_Tifa's dead Cloud. Shinra killed her in a gas chamber."_

_What? No..._

_This has to be a nightmare...this can't be real, I'm dreaming._

_My breath quickens._

"_Look you idiot!" Barret shouts, standing._

_I'm panicking, as much as I can panic while being paralyzed. _

_This isn't right, Tifa can't be dead._

"_Please Cloud, calm down." Barret says._

_Call me Spike, and show me a living Tifa and then I'll calm down. Until then, don't hold your breath._

_But, she's dead, isn't she? I know where I am now. It was different last time, I didn't know myself, I didn't want to. But I'm here now, in that stupid hospital. But Tifa was here last time, not these two. Tifa stayed with me._

_Tifa's here...but she's dead. They don't have her body, that's what Barret said._

_Oh God. _

_Her body._

_Tifa's dead._

_I can scream, and Barret flinches at my sudden outburst. _

_But they're fading, and I'm chocking. _

_There's water in my mouth, and I'm coughing now, not screaming. _

"_Cloud! Cloud!"_

_My eyes fling open, I sit bolt up, rain pouring down on me._

"_Get off the roof! Wake up! It's raining! Tifa says it's time to get up!" Marlene's voice is shrill._

_And I'm on the roof, a blanket beneath me, and rain pouring down on me. My skin is on fire, and the cool droplets tingle as the land on my bare skin. _

_Tifa said something, said to get up. That means she's alive, that means it was another nightmare._

_Another nightmare...when will they stop?_

**A/N:** Forgive the lack there of chapters... I've been gone. I've had ideas for this one, but I needed to figure out which goes first and what not. Nightmares, Cloud's been having them lately, eh? And bout Tifa dying...he's so negative sometimes. Although I do like to make him sarcastic in his head. Not that he'd really speak this way to _people, _just in his head. Try to post another chappie tomorrow, and thanks for everything!


	18. Just Be Yourself

_Just Be Yourself_

_I'm working in my room. I was ordered here about two hours ago, and I'm not brave enough to leave it. _

_Tifa's having a bad day._

_I tried to help her at the bar, but she nearly chucked a glass at me, so I thought it best to heed her words and leave the bartending to her. Even Denzel and Marlene are keeping it down. _

_It's a really, **really** bad day. _

_So I'm surprised when Denzel and Marlene burst into my room, there eyes wide with panic._

"_...What?" I ask cautiously._

"_You have to come! Now!" Marlene and Denzel shout._

_They run over, grabbing my hands, trying to pull me from my desk._

"_What's wrong? Is Tifa alright?"_

"_NO! He's back!"_

"_What? Who?"_

"_Operation Denied!" Marlene screeches._

"_Plan Z?"_

_Oh._

_My._

_God._

"_**What**?" I hiss._

"_He's down there asking her out again, and she's not acting as angry as earlier."_

"_I think she's sad."_

"_She happy, then sad, the angry, then sad! I can't keep up!" Denzel shouts._

_Oh, must be that time. _

_They're still gripping my hands, forcing me towards the door._

"_What happened to 'he's never coming back'?" I ask._

"_Well **obviously** he did! So you've got to fix it." Marlene snaps._

"_But what about your plans?"_

"_We told you Plan Z was the last one!"_

"_So what am I?"_

"_You're plan emergency!" Denzel shouts._

"_I don't get a letter?"_

"_We already used all the letters!"_

"_Really?" That's kind of impressive._

"_Oh yeah. Water balloons, hot sauce on the food...oh! Remember when we put glue on his bar stool?" Denzel exclaimed._

_Marlene nodded her head vigorously._

"_Oh! And the overflowing toilet incident." Marlene added._

_I'm not even going to ask how they pulled that one off._

"_So what am I suppose to do?"_

_Denzel and Marlene look up, surprised. I think they'd forgotten about me for a minute._

"_Just be yourself, trust us. That'll be enough." Marlene says, her eyes big with sincerity._

"_Okay..."_

_So they drag me down the steps, and we arrive at the bar. I see a man with dark, slicked back hair, and I can smell him from here. He's leaning on the bar towards Tifa, and I can tell she's tired. Her hair is frazzled, and she doesn't even have the strength to send the man away._

_Ok then...I can do this._

"_Tifa."_

_She looks up, surprised. The man does to, he scowls at me._

_Are his eyebrows waxed? Wait...is that...eye liner?_

_What the..._

"_What is it?" She asks softly._

_Crap, what do I say now?_

"_Uh...Denzel wanted to ask you something."_

_Sorry Denzel._

"_I'll take over for you for a bit."_

"_Okay." She nods her head, walking away._

_The man glares at me._

"_Are you like...her brother?"_

"_No."_

"_Best friend or something?"_

"_Or something. I live here, with our kids."_

_Oh yeah, that'll put a damper on your mood, you sick-_

"_Really? Little monsters, eh?" The man gives a crooked smile._

_Oh...I do not like this man...not at all._

"_No, not really." I state._

_My eyes are burning, I can feel them. They feel like they're on fire. I think he can tell, because he's glancing away now._

_Ha. What now?_

_His eyes are up now though, on Tifa returning. He's not giving up, not yet. But I'll make him, even if I have to use force. _

_Wait..._

_I want to use force._

_Let's just skip talking._

"_Can you believe what he wanted to ask me?" Tifa sighs angrily._

"_What?" I ask, confused._

"_He wanted to take your **sword** Cloud, your sword! For show and tell! Your sword! I almost told him yes just to see what it'd look like with him carrying it."_

_Oh Tifa...Oh Denzel, I think you've just helped me out immensely._

"_What, all of them? Or just one of them?" I ask, noticing the man fidget._

"_I don't know! I don't care, I just can't believe he even considered such a thing."_

_I think Denzel had this planned out. Or Marlene. I don't care, it's working great._

_The man is sweating now. His eyes glancing towards the door._

"_Should I go get it, just so you can see him try to carry it? It might cheer you up."_

_Tifa smirks a moment, then frowns, shaking her head lightly._

"_He doesn't need to live like we lived. I don't want that blood on his hands."_

_I nod, agreeing. This is all too true._

_However, at the same time, I happen to notice the man turn pale. He stands silently, catching Tifa off guard. Putting down some gil, he turns and walks out in silence. Tifa shakes her head in wonder. _

_I glance up, catching Denzel and Marlene poking there heads around the corner. Walking slowly over towards them, they smile._

"_Good job! You got rid of one, now go get the other!" Marlene smiles._

"_The other?"_

"_Yeah, the real trouble maker. We can never get him with any of our plans." Denzel states._

_I turn, noticing another man walking up to the bar. He's got fiery red hair and a smug look on his face. I notice there's another man, silent and bald in the corner, wearing sunglasses._

_Oh great, those two._

_At least I know Tifa won't say yes to Reno, no matter what the situation._

**A/N: **I think Denzel and Marlene knew Cloud would scare that guy away. I love making Cloud saracastic in his head, it's fun. And this was a good way to bring in the turks. Thanks for all the reviews! And I knew I threw you for a spin the last chapter. This is general/romance, so I can throw in anything. Heck, I could put in a dragon who breathes unicorns...but I'm not. Anyways! Thanks for all the kind reviews, till next time!


	19. Brother

_Brother_

_I set my mouth in a grim line as I walk over. Tifa's rolling her eyes at Reno, and Rude's walking over slowly. Did he see the menace in my eyes? Well, can't tell what he's looking at. _

"_So, when we going out, baby?" Reno purrs, resting his head on his hands, gazing up._

_I think it's some sick twisted version of a puppy dog face._

_I think I'm going to hurl._

_Tifa shoves him off the bar._

"_Do you want another drink or not?"_

"_Sure sure, always up for a drink, right, Rude my man!" Reno exclaims loudly._

_Rude clears his throat and shifts on his feet._

_How he puts up with Reno I have no idea. Must be numb to him by now._

_Tifa shoves a glass over to Reno._

"_Rude?"_

_He nods once and Tifa hands him a glass._

_Tifa surprises me, turning quickly towards me._

"_Watch the bar for a minute, I need to put the kids to bed."_

_I nod once and she leaves, leaving me with these two._

_Okay, well, Rude's not so bad. I mean, he's just quiet...well, sometimes too quiet, but still. At least he doesn't run his mouth 24/7 like Reno. I guess that's why they hang out. Reno makes up for Rude's lack of speech._

_Reno is still talking, though I know not what of._

"_Yo, Cloud! How's youse and the missus?"_

_Excuse me?_

_I feel the blush rising on my face._

_I hate you. I'd say it too, if I wasn't afraid my voice would squeak. That's a common misconception when it comes to me. Many people think I have nothing to say. I have plenty to say, it's just it normally involves some sort of embarrassment on my behalf. It's a little known fact my voice can jump a couple octaves in the span of a word when I'm nervous._

_It's just best to be silent sometimes._

_Reno howls with laughter._

"_Man, I'm just kidding you." he says, acting like he's wiping a tear away._

_Oh I'll wipe that tear off your face, you son of a-_

"_But you know I'm not serious when I come in here, right man? I mean, that one guy...whew! Are you sure he wasn't a stalker?"_

_Funny, I could say the same about you._

"_Man, did he stink! To much cologne! And was that eye liner he was wearing! Man, some people today." Reno laughs._

_Well...maybe he isn't that bad._

_But I still don't like him._

_Or trust him._

_Or want him anywhere near Tifa, whether that be in joking or serious matter._

_And it better not be serious._

_Nor alone. That is forbidden._

"_Man, that look of pure terror! I don't think I've ever seen your eyes burn like that, not ever! He must a really pissed in your cereal." Reno laughs, a slight slur in his words._

_And now Reno's chugging the glass Tifa gave him now._

_Damn, defiantly going to be seeing a lot of him._

_Reno's managed to snatch Rude's glass, who looks surprised as far as surprised goes for Rude._

_Which isn't far._

_Reno sighs, wiping his mouth off with the cuff of his jacket._

"_But zeriousleee..." Reno starts._

_Something tells me this isn't his first drink of the night._

_Or even his fifth._

"_Whens youse twos gonna, ya know, yo?" Reno smirks slightly as he draws a heart with his fingers in the air._

_I clear my throat, "What?"_

"_Ya know! I knows youse be a good man with the marriage deal what not...ya know...I mean, look around!" Reno waves his arms about him in a dramatic fashion, gesturing to the bar._

"_You're already a family! Might as well 'tie the knot' as them theres sayssss..." Reno spins his finger around in the air._

_I don't know what that gesture is suppose to mean, not that I care. I believe in his drunken state he just asked when Tifa and I were going to get married._

_Good lord, he just asked when Tifa and I were going to get married._

_Let me pause, clear my throat, and say something that will completely distract him from this subject._

_In this time Reno's chugged Rude's glass._

"_You realize that you just referred every drunk and half sober person, including yourself, as my family." I state, monotone._

_Reno reaches up and pats my arm. I think I see something of a smirk from Rude, actually, I **know** that's a smirk. _

"_Helllooo brother." Reno slurs before clunking his head onto the bar._

_My eyes meet Rude's sunglasses. _

_The man can barely keep his mouth from twitching into a smile. He loops Reno's arm around his shoulders and heaves the man up easily. Reno twitches, giving a slight wave to me, seeing that Rude is making him leave._

_Wait, Rude is making him leave._

"_Heyyyyy! I still got drinks to drinks." He protests and nearly falls over._

_Yep, time to leave Reno._

"_Oh, shove off!" Reno says pushing Rude off._

_He runs into several people as he makes for the door, each with a slurred apology, and a 'hey hot stuff' to a man with a gifted bosom. Oh, I really hope that guy is here when Reno comes in sober next time. I see Rude turn to me one last time, the hint of a smirk still evident on his face. He gives a small nod in my direction._

_And says his goodbye._

"_Brother." _

**A/N: **bwhahaha, I love picking on Cloud! And Reno is just the perfect guy to give Cloud those little 'hints'. And yes, Cloud's voice does rise to octaves on certain ocassions...tis true, promise, or at least in my world. Thanks for everything! Love ya!


	20. Worth It

_Worth it_

_I hate fighting with her. She purses her lips, and stares at me in such a way that I know she's wondering if I even have a brain in my thick skull..._

_She blushes deep crimson as she realizes she just said that out loud and not in her mind._

_She's cute even in anger._

_I have to disagree with her though, and she plants her fists on her hips, glaring at me. She let's a string of sentences fly that I can barely keep up with. I'm not even going to try as she gestures with her hands and stomps her foot once. I've heard it all before, but it's for good a reason I tell her. She just sighs and shakes her head in disbelief before walking away._

_I sigh as she finishes up dinner, Denzel and Marlene chatting away happily. They hadn't heard our disagreement earlier. _

_She wants me to take sometime off, and while at any other time I'd be happy to oblige, I know I've been taking on extra jobs again, but it's all for a good reason._

_She just doesn't believe me._

_We eat dinner in silence, and Denzel and Marlene pick up on that. They both glance between me and Tifa, and we both keep our eyes averted. Denzel tries to strike up conversation but after a soft 'hmm' from Tifa and a nod of the head from me, he gives up. I feel bad for the kids; they have to sit through this. I can tell it bothers them, but not as much as it could. Tifa and I really never fight, and when we do we can't stay mad at each other._

_Well...I know I can't stay mad at her. Either she just follows along or doesn't stay mad at me._

_The kids go to bed early tonight. I think they understand Tifa and I need to talk. Of course, I also know they're probably doing that so they can sneak out and listen to our talk. Blame it on Yuffie teaching the kids the 'ways of the ninja.' Tifa nearly drop kicked Yuffie when she found out._

_She puts the kids to bed and returns to the bar, finishing up the cleaning. I walk over slowly and sit down, the awkwardness is suffocating me._

"_Cloud, you have-_

"_Listen Tifa-_

_We look up, caught off guard by each other. She smiles slowly and I return her smile with a small one of my own._

"_Tifa, I know what you're going to say..." I start slowly._

"_Then listen to reason for once!" She growls._

_Well, that cheery moment didn't last too long, did it?_

"_I know Tifa, just a little longer and I'll back off on the jobs."_

"_A little longer? Cloud, you won't make it a little longer! You're burning yourself out."_

"_No, I'm not...it's important to me."_

"_Honestly, Cloud! What could possibly be so important for you to overwork yourself for? You're going to kill yourself through exhaustion!"_

_I can barely keep my mouth from twitching slightly. I really think she's forgotten about it._

"_What...**what?**" Tifa asks._

_She's seen the amusement in my eyes...damn...time for a counter attack._

"_How about this Teef..."_

_She looks at me cautiously._

"_I'll take a day off when **you** take a day off."_

_Her jaw practically hits the floor._

"_What? Are you insane? I can't take a day off! I have the children! I can't take a day off from being...well...a...a..."_

"_A what, Tifa?"_

_She mumbles something incoherent, but I take a stab at it._

"_A mother?"_

_She blushes furiously. _

_I understand her blush, especially since she's talking to me. While I know she doesn't mind taking the role of mother, it's just often times when she is portrayed as a mother, there is relation to a father..._

_And I being the male living in the house, that often results of me._

_Not that I mind, it's...just complicated. Tifa and I aren't married, so..._

_It can just be awkward sometimes, ok?_

_I feel a blush of my own rising at my thoughts of Tifa and I married._

"_Well, how about I give you a day off...I'll take a day off sometime this week, and I'll pick a day for you... and I'll be...well, I'll be..."_

_I want to say father but I can't. I know I am the father, just as much as she's the mother, it's just she's got a lot more practice in it. Plus, she's been addressed as their mother more often than I as their father, what with the traveling job and what not. I can see it in her eyes she understands._

_However, she gives a mischievous grin._

"_You'll be mother?"_

_I can't keep the little shock off my face._

_Oh that was low._

"_Okay, I'll take you up on that deal, mom."_

_Ouch! She giggles, and I feel myself blush. Despite the embarrassment, I'm glad we've come to an agreement._

_Tifa laughs again, "Heh, according to my memory you looked **great** in a dress."_

_Oh, she did not just bring that up._

_"Honestly, I was jealous of your figure in that dress!" Tifa exclaims, laughing._

_I drop my head, hoping to hide the blush and she places her hand over my mine._

_"I really perfer you as a man though."_

_I smile, that's a good thing._

_I've still got my eyes averted though, thinking this will hide my blush that has not yet receeded. So I'm surprised when she leans over the bar and kisses me on the lips. Not that I object, it just catches me off guard. _

_We stay like that for awhile, our lips meeting across the bar. I wouldn't trade this moment for anything. I'd say our little spat and being called 'mother' was worth it._

_However, I think I hear to childish giggles come from the stairwell._

_Tifa wraps her hands around my neck however, and I don't give it a second thought._

_Oh yeah, it was definately worth it._

**A/N: **hehehehe, I am evil. Rend, was that your impression of Reno? heh, Rend-Reno...only a letter off! Yeah, I'm sleep deprived! Anyways, enjoy! and thank you all for such wonderful reviews. Love ya


	21. An Exhausting Day

**A/N:** Yes, I know you've been standing outside my door for a few days with pitchforks and torches, chucking keyboards at me so I'll write...so here! Here! TAKE IT! Please don't kill me! OKAY! **READ important: **this way you won't be confused...ahem, in this chapter, there is alot of remembering going on, and since it's all in italics, I denoted it with the little "...". "..." At beginning of sentence/paragraph begins memory. "..." At end, ends it! And they're centered. I hope it doesn't confuse you, but I really liked it this way...ahem, that is all.

_An Exhausting Day_

_**"...**I can remember what got it all started, the day I realized. Of course, it wasn't my own cleverness that made me see it, it was my stupidity that blinded me, actually. But that didn't keep me from getting surprised by who it was that actually told me, made me realize**..."**_

_My day off starts rather nicely. I sleep in late, and Tifa somehow keeps the kids from pouncing on me in the early morning. I hear them run past my room once when they get up to get ready for school. However, after that, there is nothing. I sigh gratefully into my pillow, burying my face._

_**"...**It was that stupid ninja...she came and visited us several months back. She does this every now and then, she comes and helps Tifa around the bar. It's kind of her, but that still doesn't mean it doesn't drive me crazy. Really, my initial reaction was to toss her off a cliff when she first brought it up**..."**_

_It's a few hours later when I finally get up, roused by the sunlight blinding me. I stumble down the steps, bleary-eyed, and stub my toe. Cursing I walk into the bar._

_Well, damn._

_I've forgotten the bar was open today, and as a result, I'm now in my pajamas, my hair is even more spikier than usual, and cursing like Cid._

_Well, that's only slightly embarrassing._

_Tifa catches my arm, spins me around and walks me back upstairs. She pushes me into my room and I turn. She smiles._

"_Don't worry, I'll bring you up some lunch."_

_She shuts the door and I hear her footsteps recede._

_**"...**I guess it was because it was that stupid ninja telling me; that's what got me upset. I mean, honestly, who wants to be told that by an irresponsible, thieving, conniving, little demon ninja? Who wants to have **that** see it before you do? Shouldn't this type of thing be something you figure out on your own? Well, I suppose not; Oh sure, half of it was **real** easy to figure out...but it's the part not involving yourself, not with your own point of view that's hard to see, and it's even harder to believe it when you finally do see**..."**_

_I make my way down at about two, fully clothed this time, and try demand that Tifa let me help her. I get a swift thump on the nose and she shoos me away. She will let me sit at the bar though, that's about it._

_Still, it's enough. I can watch out for potential problems, however there's been no sign of 'operation Z' nor my 'brothers'. Tch, I really should've caused some pain for both of those two...Still, most of the patrons are smart enough to stay away from Tifa, or have wives. It's the travellers you have to watch out for, especially the younger ones. You can come in the bar for food, but you can't drink unless you're over 21, so that means we get all sorts of age groups. However, there's been no trouble today._

_**"...**It was watching him. He wasn't like the others, I can tell. He could make Tifa blush. Most of the time she just sent them all on there way, albeit politely (that means they normally asked again) but they were no problems. **This **one however, is not as persistent. He drops light hints, and doesn't overbear with the compliments...a real charmer. He's not fake. You can tell he works for his living. His shoes are caked with mud, and the edges of his jeans worn. He's probably a good man, but that doesn't keep me from hating him._

_This is a potential danger._

_So as I'm glowering at this guy's back, I didn't see her come up with that stupid grin on her face. It wasn't till she tapped my shoulder that I turned my glare on her. _

"_What?" I asked coldly._

_And she just laughed**..."**_

_I can't believe I'm doing this. I mean, I know I was bored, and I know I complained a bit, but still! Sewing is hardly my forte. _

_I curse for the umpteenth time and Tifa giggles. I'm saved though, when two tiny bodies fling their arms around my neck. I feign a gag, but I still manage to prick myself with the needle again. I keep the two entertained (and myself) until supper. We all eat together, and I go sit out by the bar again. It's about eight thirty, and Marlene and Denzel are upstairs getting ready for bed. After the bar closes soon, we'll put them to bed._

_That's right, I said we'll...but don't expect Dudley in that we._

_I smile, but my good mood is flattened when I see **him** walk into the bar._

_**"...**She makes me feel a bit better when she mentions the fact he's probably just a traveler...however she ruins it by saying he's probably had tons of practice with other barmaids...that's why he's so good, she says._

_Oh shut up._

"_You still haven't said why you were laughing..." I point out._

_Yuffie giggles again, "Isn't it **obvious**?"_

_I glower, "If it were obvious, I wouldn't be asking."_

"_Oh come on Cloud! You know you have the absolute **biggest **crush on her."_

_I do? So that's what this was? I hadn't recognized this feeling...oh, yeah, that makes sense now._

_Wait...did she just say that in public? With Tifa like ten feet from me? Is she bloody insane?!_

"_Calm down, tiger," She says, seeing the anger in my eyes, "It's not a problem since she obviously has a crush on you, too."**..."**_

_I don't waste anytime. Not this time, buddy boy. I move swiftly behind the bar as the man slowly saunters up. _

_Nope, you aren't saying a word out of context. You shall keep your mouth of charms closed, okay? Okay!_

"_Cloud? What're you doing?" Tifa is perplexed._

_She's going to get mad soon, thinking I'm protesting about just sitting doing nothing._

_But I'm not protesting, I'm kissing._

_Sure, the kiss looks modest. Closed mouth, not very long, but it's full of passion. It's a thrill to kiss in public I've discovered._

_However, I think I just heard the bar gasp. What's this, they're thinking...Cloud Strife showing public displays of affection? Ye gods!_

_I pull back, and Tifa is flustered, though not angry. I spare a glance at the man. He's opted to sit at table instead of the bar._

"_What was that for?" She asks, blushing_

"_For making me take a day off."_

_**"...**Wait...what did she just say?_

"_A crush, on me?"_

"_Mm hmm..." Yuffie nods her head, lips pursed together._

"_She can't..."_

"_She can."_

"_She doesn't..."_

"_She does. I mean, come on Cloud, take a look at her."_

_So I do, reluctantly. I've been to busy watching the threat to notice Tifa's reaction. Sure, she's blushing, but there's nothing else different._

"_Watch," Yuffie says, leaning over my shoulder, watching intently, "He's going in for the kill."_

_Ech, bad choice of words, but it's true. I can tell by the way the man gestures his hand, palm facing up and open, leaning on the bar with his other arm. There's a sincere look in his eyes as he talks to Tifa._

"_But she'll reject 'im." Yuffie states, her gaze now shifting to me._

_Why is she watching me? But I see she right once again, Tifa shaking her head no, but still smiling and undoubtedly thanking him anyways. I feel my eyes go wide, and my lips separate slightly, my jaw dropping slightly. I know now Yuffie just wanted to watch my reaction._

"_But why?" I don't even realize I've spoken till Yuffie answers._

"_She's waiting for you, big boy."**..."**_

_These are my last thoughts as I drift into sleep. The man left and the bar closed without incident. I'm not in my bed as I fall asleep though. Heck, I'm not even in Tifa's._

_It's Marlene's. I've got my head tilted down slightly in drousiness, registering the fact that Denzel is lying with his head on my left leg, my arm draped over him, still lightly clutching the book I was reading. (And no it's NOT Dudley)_

_Marlene is tucked in on my right, her head lolling back onto Tifa's stomach. Tifa is on my right side, her arm wrapped loosely around my waste, her head resting on my chest. My arm is around her, my hand resting lightly on her waist. I smile lightly, looking at my little family. Looking back on it now, I realize Yuffie must've said something to Denzel and Marlene to push me to asking Tifa out that first time. Why else would she have agreed on such short notice to watch the kids?_

_I sigh contentedly as sleep finally overtakes me. I haven't done much but remember, but it's still been an exhausting day. _

_Course, remembering usually is._

**A/N: **So, I hope that wasn't to confusing. I tried to make it special, for late updates! Anyways...as always, thanks for everything, and for anyone who reviewed on _My Cloud_, since, ya know, it's one chapter, I can't thank you there...and hopefully it was good enough ya wanted to read more. ANYWAYS...I'll try and update Come Together tomorrow, but I make no promises...just put away the pitchforks, and ya owe me for breaking my window with that typewriter...heh..my attempt at 'author humor'...yeah, just ignore me, that's what I normally do.


	22. We'll Just Stick With Plan

_We'll Just Stick With Plan_

_It's two weeks from my day off when I tell Tifa it's her turn. She sighs, eyeing me, looking upset. Well, she does have a reason to be upset...technically I tell her the night before, and somehow I manage to bark orders. I'm not even going to let her clean up the bar._

"_Cloud...my day off starts **tomorrow**..." Tifa says, glaring at me._

"_No, it starts now." I state._

_She huffs once, and plants her hands on her hips._

_Oh no, not that stance. Can't let this get much farther, or she'll have me backed into a corner. Time to end this._

_I say the first thing that comes to my mouth...which isn't always a good thing._

"_Upstairs...bubble bath...now." I point towards the steps._

_Wow...did I just say that?_

_I see her face freeze in shock, contort into amusement, and then she burst into laughter, leaning over and clutching her stomach. I feel the heat surface on my face, but at least she isn't assuming the "there's no chance in hell I'm going to change my mind" stance._

_Undoubtedly, despite the length of time we've known each other, Tifa has probably never heard me say the words "bubble bath"._

_Is it really that damn funny?_

_I can't help but try and muffle the laugh that's trying to rise._

_It is...hell, I don't think I've ever even heard **myself** say bubble bath..._

_Bubble bath...snicker._

_I struggle to find a straight face as Tifa leans on her knees, still in full blown laughter. I take three deep breaths and calm myself. _

'_Come on, Strife, we've got work to do.'_

_Did I just refer to myself in the third person in my own head?...I have **got** to start talking more._

"_I'm serious Teef..." I begin, and she has stopped laughing...and is now gasping for breath._

"_You know Marlene will be very upset when she finds out all the trouble she went through was in vain."_

_Tifa's eyes widened._

"_Marlene set it up?" She asks._

_I give a curt nod, and she responds with a defeated sigh._

"_All right, all right...I'll go..."_

"_Better hurry before the water gets cold." I say as she heads towards the steps._

_She turns quickly and pulls a face before disappearing._

_I let myself smirk. _

_Heh...bubble bath._

_I never realized how much work Tifa has to do when she's cleaning up the bar. As I head upstairs to put the children to bed, I stop outside the bathroom door. I can hear her softly singing, and I smile slightly. After tomorrow, maybe she'll sing more._

_I tuck the two in bed, and finish wiping down the bar. As I head upstairs, I see Tifa has left the bathroom, and I poke my head in her door slowly. She's sleeping on her side, and she's still in her robe. I walk in softly and shut the window she's left open. I slip her beneath the blankets, trying to ignore the fact that she's only wearing her robe._

_Yep...just going to ignore that._

_As I'm settling her beneath the blankets though, she reaches out and pulls me over in her sleep. I sigh, she's got a firm lock on my waist. Well...I guess I can handle this._

_Despite the fact it's her day off, she's the first one up in the morning. I don't even stir when she gets up. I scold her for making breakfast, but she just sighs. I shoo her from the bar. We're not opening it today._

"_Cloud, I know I agreed to taking a day off, but I just can't sit around here doing **nothing**...the bar practically screams at me to do something." Tifa huffs, tapping her foot on the ground._

"_I know...that's why I have something planned...if you wouldn't mind." I state softly._

_This has to work...it **has** to...if I don't get her out...if she doesn't say yes, well, then we're all screwed._

_Yes...we'll ALL be screwed...I'll be murdered, so there'll be no saving the world from the wrath of ...shudders...**them...**_

_Please just say yes! Pleasesayyes, pleasesayyes, pleasesayyes..._

"_Really? Okay."_

_I let out a sigh of relief...I hadn't realized I'd been holding my breath._

"_What are we doing?"_

"_Well...it's been a while..and I just want to go...with you...and since you've not been with me so...it's just a couple deliveries...sort of personal, something I want to do...you know...nothing much, just a bit of traveling...yeah" I hear myself mumble._

_Just stop...stop talking...I think I'm just making matters worse._

_Wait..._

_I mumbled and rambled at the same time...how does one accomplish this?_

"_Okay..." Tifa says cautiously. "When are we going?"_

"_In a bit, if you don't mind. We might want to pack a lunch or something...in case we get hungry."_

"_Alright...you go get Fenrir ready, and I'll pack us a lunch." She smiles at me._

_My knees just turned to mush...her smile has that affect on me. Yeah, I'll go get Fenrir, as soon as I remember how my legs work...sounds like a plan._

_Or a date..._

"_..."_

_We'll just stick with plan._

**A/N:** HELLO! well, I know...short chapter...but the next chapter should be like...BIG...so bare with me...heh, bubble bath...I meant to update Come Together...but have ya ever sat down to write something and was like, this is going to be spiffilicious...and then you tried writing it, and you're just having problems? Yeaaah...heh...that's my problem...so, I'll be aways once again...but thank you guys SOOO much for your kind reviews, I'm so glad you're enjoying this one...and yes Rend...poor POOR Cloud...and it was a bit confusing...but so am I...enjoy! Love ya all!


	23. Um, Surprise?

_Um...Surprise?_

_I lightly wonder if she had any idea where we were going. She doesn't show a surprised look, or really any type of emotion as we enter the church. I know she use to come here some, to visit Aerith...just like I did sometimes. I figure we can do this together...granted, I won't be speaking aloud like I sometimes do...I mean, some of the things are about..._

_Well, ...I...hmm, I just needed some womanly advice...okay...that's all._

_Tifa kneels by the pool and drapes her fingers in, and the ripples spread out. There's a few flower pedals floating on the top of the water, and flowers around the edge of the pool. _

"_I was wondering what we were going to do..." Tifa starts softly, "I'm glad this is it...it's been a while, too long..."_

_She doesn't say anything else, and I don't respond. We each need to speak...it's not that I wouldn't share anything with Tifa, I mean, that's why she's here. It's just the silence of the church is to peaceful to be broken._

_So...how've you been? Listen, before you scold, I know it's been awhile...I've just been really busy...and I brought Tifa..._

_...awkward silence..._

_Yeah, I know, I know...stop making excuses..._

'_You're really something, Cloud Strife.' A voice responds, and I smirk._

_Always trying my best._

_I don't know how long we spent there, speaking with her. I remember glancing at Tifa once, though, and seeing a shy smile and blush on her face as she stared at a flower._

_Can you tell me what she's saying?_

'_If you're so curious, you should ask her yourself...now what was it that Yuffie called you again? Tiger?' She giggles._

_Oh ha ha, very funny. Listen, we need to get going soon, make another stop...well, before, ya' know._

'_I do, go...he'll be happy to see you...and don't forget my delivery.'_

_Yes ma'am._

_I can practically feel the air in the church smile, and Tifa stands, a big grin on her face. She looks at me, still smiling, and my knees go to mush. She walks towards the edge of the pool and pulls a small pocket knife from her pocket. Kneeling down, she clips off a few flowers and we leave._

_We stop half way there and eat the small lunch she's made for us. We don't feel the need to speak, it's nice just to enjoy each other's presence. After all the time I was missing a year ago, I don't mind just sitting with people. I enjoy people being there._

_...Well, not all people...but you get the idea._

_When we reach his sword, I see it's sort of careened to the left a bit. I straighten it, pulling it from the earth, and then stabbing it back in again. Tifa walks up, the flowers she protected on the ride over in her hand. She reaches up to her arm, though, and unties the pink ribbon. I watch, curious, as she kneels, laying the flowers on the ground, and ties the yellow and white lilies together with the pink strand. She looks up and smiles, and my heart warms. She stands and walks over to the sword, placing the small bouquet up against the blade. _

"_Something else..." I whisper quietly._

_Tifa watches as I walk up to the sword, untying my own ribbon, Tifa will make some more for us when we get back to the bar. I tie it to the top of the hilt in a bow...not a shabby bow either, looks pretty nice for a swordsman, I must say._

'_Oh quit bragging you egotistical moron, it's not that great.'_

_That was quite the welcome. Here we are delivering you a present from your love, and you call me names...how rude._

'_I'll have you know I've tied much better bows than that load of crap.'_

_I think someone sounds a little bitter._

'_Ah, bite me...so how things going?'_

_I roll my eyes, just like Zack to insult and act like nothing has happened._

'_Today's the big day, huh?'_

_Yeah, she doesn't even have a clue...she doesn't, does she? I mean, she's not saying anything suspicious or suspecting, right?_

'_Calm down, Tiger.'_

_Crap._

'_She's not saying anything that should result in paranoia on your half, worry wart.'_

_Good...you don't talk to Tifa like this, do you?_

'_Of course not! What do you take me for? You? She's a lady...you, you're just...well...I haven't figured that out yet...how bout we settle for freak of nature?'_

_I roll my eyes._

_Really letting it fly today? Gee, thanks._

'_Sorry man, gotta make up for lost time, shortie.'_

_...I know you did not just say that._

'_Do you prefer that or cross-dresser?'_

_I am so glad Tifa is kneeling right now, and can't see the blush on my face._

'_Heh, yeah, Aerith told me all about that one! And Tifa's reiterating on her behalf right at this moment!'_

_I glance over at Tifa, and sure enough, she's got that smile on her face...that smile that only means one thing: picturing me in a dress._

'_Well, it's not like she had to leave it up to the imagination. She's already seen it, I on the other hand have to completely imagine you in a -_

_Okay, enough of that, just stop._

'_Whatever...Anyways, listen, you two have fun tonight, and good luck. I'll be with you all the way, and so will Aerith'_

_Thanks Zack._

'_Hey, Cloud...you do know I'm just picking on you, right? I don't mean it, really.'_

_Hey, you said it yourself before...we're friends, right?_

'_Right...yeah, um, you might want to check the time.'_

_The time? Huh?_

_...Oh...oh no...I'm dead...Why didn't you tell me earlier?!_

_'Sorry! We were having a moment!'_

_A moment? You were making fun of me!_

_'Now, Cloud...'_

_Oh, shut up. I'm not talking to you._

_'Technically you weren't talking to me earlier, and me being the bad ass I am, read your mind.'_

_Get out of my head._

_'Yeah, I'll shut up now.'_

_"Tifa...We need to go."_

_"Hmm? Okay." Tifa stands._

_"Bye Zack." She gives a small wave to the sword._

_Yeah, bye you son of a-_

_'Think happy thoughts.'_

_I don't even remember getting on Fenrir. All I know is that I'm dead. D-E-A-D dead. That might as well be my name. They're going to kill me! Not only are we late, but they had to move that beast. Damn...they'll kill me! What do I do? Maybe I can hide behind Tifa. They won't hurt her...but me..._

_Yep, I'm dead._

_"Cloud? Cloud!"_

_"Hmm?"_

_"Think you're going fast enough?" Tifa giggles into my ear._

_No, we can't go fast enough to keep them from killing me._

_"Yeah, I guess..." But I'm not going to slow down!_

_Tifa just giggles again, but doesn't say anything about the speed again. As we pull up to the bar, I get off stiffly. Tifa giggles._

_"What's wrong with you? You really seem uptight." She squeezes my arm. "You okay?"_

_"Yeah." Damn squeaky voice._

_"Did your voice-_

_"Yes, it did. Let's go." I place my hand on the small of her back and lead her in._

_That's when it hits me as she turns and kisses me on the lips, opening the door knob._

_There's a shout of surprise, and Tifa looks up, caught off guard. She's should be smiling, but she's just blushing furiously, because the gang's all here. _

_I don't know who is more surprised:_

_Tifa for her surprise birthday party..._

_Or the gang for finding out that Tifa and I are a couple..._

_Yeah, they didn't know...so you guys just figure that out on your own._

_'Actually, I already know...and they're just surprised that they didn't have a hand in it...except for Yuffie of course.'_

_Zack?_

_'Yep?'_

_For the last time, get out of my head._

_'Does it help any at all to know that this will delay killing you? I mean, they do want answers.'_

_I hate you._

**A/N: **that was quite the compliment Rend...thank you...did you guess correctly? Okay, before any of you tell me that there was no flowers left at the end of the movie, it was just a freaking big pool...bite me...just go with it, kay? Good, thanks...and I know Aerith and Zack random talking in head probably doesn't seem very healthy in the real world...good thing it's not! And before you ask, why didn't they speak sooner? We'll just save it as special occasions...yep, that's it...yeah, just go with alot this chapter...heh, author liberty...that's what we'll call it...that's all...thanks for reviews and love! Expect other story updates sunday/monday...kay? later loves


	24. Exploding Banana, No Comment

**A/N:** Soo! Attention please! All 'couple' comments in this chapter...full credit to Rend...thanks for that review...inspired meh.

_Exploding Banana...No Comment_

_Awkward silence..._

_...yep..._

_This is very uncomfortable..._

_...uh huh..._

'_Hey, I have a question...since when are you and Tifa a couple?'_

_**Zack...**_

_...hmm, I wasn't aware of the fact you could growl in your mind...I'll have to keep that in mind._

'_Bigger fish to fry...' Zack's voice is urgent._

_I glance up, seeing what he means. Each of their jaws are slightly parted in disbelief...although I can't say about Vincent with that hell of a high collar he's sporting._

"_Cloud! Tifa!" Denzel and Marlene rush in, breaking the awkward silence._

_Oh bless all things holy for children._

"_What took you so long? We're you two kissing?" Marlene and Denzel pooch out their lips and make smacking noises._

_Yeah, that comment about children...you can just scratch that..._

'_Cloud!' Aerith yells._

_Kidding!...I forget you can read my mind...it's rather unsettling._

'_For who? You or us? You have some explicit fantasies going on in these far corners of your mind.'_

_I swear Zack, one more word...and it'll mean pain._

'_How does a dead person feel pain?'_

_I'll find a way...hey, here's one! Aerith...did Zack ever tell you about the time when we were in Midgar...and that Zack visited your church...and he shoved a firecracker in a banana and threw it inside?_

_...another awkward silence._

'_You...did...WHAT?!'_

'_CLOUD! How **could **you?! You swore you'd never tell a soul!'_

'_That was **you**?!'_

'_Aerith baby, please...it was just a little joke!'_

'_You call that a JOKE?! So you're telling me you had time to desecrate my church but not visit me?!'_

'_We just happened to pass by it!'_

'_And you just happened to have a banana and a firecracker handy, hmm?'_

'_Well..yes...I did! Aerith! Opportunity knocked! I couldn't just leave it hanging! You weren't there...so I left my mark!'_

'_Do you have any idea how long that took me to clean up? I'm going to kill you!'_

'_HA! You can't do that!'_

'_You'll wish I could by the time I'm done with you!'_

'_Aerith!'_

_Their voices fade out...that should keep 'em busy for a while. I almost smirk, but I realize I never answered Denzel and Marlene's question...soooo everyone is still staring. That didn't help at **all**._

"_Denzel...Marlene...don't you have a present for Tifa?" I ask, changing the subject._

_Their eyes brighten immediately, and they nod their head vigorously. They start to rush from the room, but Yuffie catches them in her arms._

"_Whoa you two...what did we decide?"_

"_Oh...sorry, we forgot."_

_Yuffie releases them and grabs a package from the table. She holds it out to Tifa, and Tifa takes it gingerly. She shakes it lightly, and Yuffie sighs, impatient._

"_Just open it!"_

_Tifa tears the paper, which, by the way is an orange bubble print...who came up with that idea? Orange bubbles? Really..._

_It's a plain white box, and she tears the tape with her thumb nail and pops the lid open. It's a dress. A black dress._

_Tifa in a dress...nice..._

'_See what I was talking about?'_

_ZACK! Isn't your girlfriend still trying to kill you?_

_No answer...I'll take that as a yes._

_She lifts it from the box and holds it out. It's simple, looks form fitting. It stops at what I'm guessing will be mid-thigh, and the sleeves drape of the shoulder, and are only a few inches wide. _

"_It's beautiful...but why this one first?" Tifa asks._

"_Because! Cloud being the awesome man he is got us all reservations at some really fancy restaurant tonight! So, everyone needs to get dressed...now!" Yuffie squeals, hopping up and down._

_Ow...my ear...she's really excited about this one...probably get us thrown out of the restaurant...and that'll be a waste of money._

"_Why didn't you get dressed before we got here?" Tifa asks dubiously._

"_Because silly! That might've ruined the surprise!" Yuffie responds, smiling._

"_Well, since mister Spiky-ass-I'll-be-on-time-but-not-really was late, we'll be late if we don't get ready in about...oh I'd say ... seven minutes...tops." Cid states nonchalantly. _

_This is why I am dead. But honestly...is my ass spiky? I can barely keep from glancing back to make sure._

"_Scramble!" Yuffie yells._

_...Annnnddd...nobody moves._

"_What?" Barret growls._

"_Get a move you on stupid idiot! Dress! Change! Find a room and put some presentable clothes on, you heathen!"_

"_Wha'd you call me?"_

"_You heard me, you overgrown oaf!"_

"_Why, you lil' f-_

"_Okay Barret!" Tifa interjects, stepping between the two. "Denzel, Marlene...can you handle getting dressed on your own?"_

_The two nod their head yes._

"_Good, then get to it...Umm, Shera...you and Cid can change in my room...Barret...you can take the bathroom...Yuffie..."_

"_I'll change in the back, in the storage room."_

"_If one drop of that alcohol is gone..." Tifa starts._

"_Hey! That's for **after** the fancy dinner, silly!" Yuffie states, turning away._

_I watch as the disperse...did she purposely leave me and her by ourselves...with just my room to change?_

'_Watch those thoughts...'_

'_ZACK!'_

_Huh...for once it's not me yelling at him, and for the third time tonight, I feel their presence dissipate from my mind. I glance down, catching Nanaki with Cait Sith sitting on his back._

"_Honestly, Reeve...will we ever see you in person?" Tifa asks._

"_Marlene can abuse me in person...she can drag this old cat robot around through the dirt for all I care...I on the other hand, am much, **much** more delicate...and only one of a kind...shouldn't you be getting dressed?"_

"_Yeah, yeah...Come on Cloud." Tifa motions for me to follow._

_She can't be serious!_

_...wow...Aerith must've really chased Zack away...nice._

_Tifa sees I'm not moving, so reaches back, grabbing my hand and pulls me towards the steps._

"_I'm assuming you've already got something picked out, right?"_

"_Umm..."_

"_Cloud..." she scolds as we reach the room._

"_How fancy?"_

"_What?"_

"_How fancy of a restaurant are we talking about?" Tifa asks, opening my closet._

"_I..."_

_Tifa pulls out a light blue, button up shirt. I don't think I knew I even had that. She reaches out and pulls out a pair of black dress pants, smacking the sides of them once to knock the dust off. She shoves them in my arms before fishing out two black socks and a pair of dress shoes. She has to dust these off as well._

"_It's been awhile since we've bought you new dress shoes...there's a small possibility these may be a bit tight..."_

"_Why...I haven't grown any..."_

"_Yeah, but you couldn't come with us when we got dress clothes, remember? And that was what...two and a half years ago?"_

"_True..."_

"_Well, start getting dressed." She says, laying her dress out on the bed._

"_Um...Tifa...?"_

_She looks up in shock, her face paling, and then turning a deep crimson._

"_Oh...right...you just face that way...I'll face this way...crisis averted." Tifa tries to smile as she turns around._

_I do the same, facing the opposite direction. Man...this is kind of awkward...I did say earlier that we were a couple...but...I mean...well..._

_God! Can't she just tell me?_

_I listen to the rustles of clothes, and the folding of fabric as she changes. I mean...she did just come up here to help me find something to wear...I am that dense as to not pick out something...but I thought that maybe we would get back earlier. I pull up my pants, and clip my belt. As I shrug into my shirt, she speaks._

"_Cloud...um, sorry to ask, but can you zip me?"_

"_Huh?" I ask, turning slightly._

_She's still got her back to me, and her dress is unzipped all the way down to her lower back._

"_Zip me up, please?" She asks._

_She isn't facing me, so she's probably blushing._

"_Sure."_

_As I walk over, I happen to glance down at my chest. There's a number of scars there, but one stands out above the rest. The scar where Masamune pierced my chest all those years ago in the reactor. Tifa has a scar too._

_I'm still moving towards her, and I touch my scar lightly, and I don't even **realize** I'm doing what I'm doing...you have to believe me. I honestly must've been on autopilot or **something**, because it's when my fingers touch her cool skin, I snap and realize what I'm doing._

_I'm standing behind her, and touching her scar. It's very strategically placed you see, and maybe it wouldn't have been so...I don't know...strange...if I hadn't stuck my hand through the opening of the back of her dress and touched it._

_Oh._

_My._

_God._

_What am I doing?!_

"_Does it still hurt?" _

_Did I just ask that? Am I bipolar or something? What the HELL!_

_She's frozen at my touch, and she's breathing shallowly, but at least she hasn't thrown me over her shoulder in self defense._

"_It burns...all the time."_

"_Mine too." And it's actually me who answers that. _

_You know what, I don't care if I'm bipolar...it's true...and I'm glad I know about her scar as well._

_I slip my hand from her dress and zip up the back of it, and she turns to face me. She looks me straight in the eye, and then kisses me._

_It's the most passionate kiss we've ever shared. Her lips burn against mine, and her body molds against my own, pressed tightly up against me by my arms and hers. One of her hands tangle through my hair, the other presses against my chest, and my hands roam her back, and I'm wishing I hadn't zipped up her dress._

"_Cloud!" _

_The voice makes us both jump and Tifa zips away from me._

"_What're you doing?! Hurry it up! And have you seen Tifa?" Yuffie's voice is insistent through the door._

_I clear my throat, "Just a minute."_

"_Alright! But hurry up!"_

_I hear her footsteps recede, and I turn towards Tifa. She's flustered and straightening her hair, her face a deep crimson._

"_Umm...I've still got to get shoes...and stuff..."_

"_Yeah..."_

"_Okay."_

"_Okay."_

"_Um...I'll see you down stairs." She runs from the room, still pulling at her hair._

_At first I think I've done something wrong, and she goes to pull the door shut quickly behind her. Not quick enough though that I don't see the huge grin spread across her face. She's still blushing, though._

_I smile as I finish getting ready. It's nice to know my kisses can make her flustered. I button up my shirt, and I groan as I hear him come back._

'_Don't worry Cloud, we're just here for the night...we being all powerful still can't handle being in your mind for too long.' Zack replies smugly._

_What is he so cocky about...Aerith was attacking him earlier._

'_Something spicy just happened, didn't it? And I missed it, didn't I?'_

_No comment._

'_Cloud.' _

_Aerith?_

'_...it was your idea about the banana, wasn't it?'_

_No comment._

**A/N: **Holy crap...I had soooo much fun writing this chapter...and it's really long for Diaries...like super...this is the longest chapter yet. so you guys better enjoy this...and give lots of reviews...cause lots of stuff happened in this one...well, I mean, review if ya want...heh...THANKS for everything! And Rend, thanks again...although ya didn't have to bite! Everyone's review for the last chapter were bloody awesome...so, THANK YOU! FOR everything...seriously...you guys make writing all worth it! Until next time..Love, peace and all that jazz.


	25. Payback's A Hostess

_Payback's a Hostess_

_I'm never taking these people out to eat again. Period._

_'Aw, what's wrong kid? Is your steak burnt?'_

_Shut up Zack._

_'No, this is my one night with ya for a while, so I figure I'm going to annoy the **hell **out of you.'_

_I hate you._

_'Aw, that's what they all say.'_

_Including Aerith?_

_'Dude…I would so not mention her name…she may bring the heavens down upon you in a fiery wrath of doom.'_

_Do you realize you just used the words 'doom' and 'Aerith' in the same sentence?_

_'You obviously have never seen Aerith pissed.'_

_So she's still not talking to me?_

_'Nope.'_

_Great, she's not talking to me, and you won't shut up…what an awesome night this is turning out to be._

_'Hey…you're the one with a big fancy steak in front of you, and complaining.'_

_"Cloud?"_

_"Hmm?" I look up, startled._

_"Help…" Tifa hisses._

_I look up as she points down the table._

_My God, who gave Yuffie wine?_

_She's dancing in her seat to violin music...and it's not exactly…_

_…it's just not a pretty sight._

_"Dammit brat…start behaving like a normal 'effin person." Cid hisses at her as she throws her hands up in the air._

_"Cid!" Barret growls, covering Marlene's ears._

_Why oh why did I ever think this was a good idea?_

_"Oh, like you've never cursed in front of her, you pompous bast-_

_"Cid!" Tifa hisses as she elbows me in the side._

_What am I suppose to do about it? I can't control these people…they're crazy!_

_'It was your idea.'_

_Shut **up** Zack._

_"Guys…please…public place." I manage to mutter._

_"She really must be a ninja to be able to steal a sip of Vincent's wine." Cid mutters._

_"What was that, old man?" Yuffie glares at him, her dancing stopped._

_"At least she stopped dancing." Barret states._

_Oh…she is not…_

_"Yuffie! Don't you dare start throwing food in this restaurant!" Tifa scolds._

_Yuffie blushes, and drops her fork._

_Honestly, can't these people wait until we get back to the bar? They've been like this since we got here! This is a really ritzy place too! Lots of money, and just for the reservations! Man, I am so not paying for their dinners…just mine, Tifa's, and Denzel's…Barret can take care of Marlene...no I am not cheap!_

_Although, the most awkward moment of the night was when the hostess told us that pets weren't allowed._

_In which an awkward, yet shocked silence ensued, and then Nanaki promptly replied, "Then how the hell did you get in here?"_

_Never call Nanaki a pet…I know he really wanted to attach a certain word onto the end of that sentence…but him being the ever diplomatic…didn't…though I'm pretty sure I heard Barret and Cid mutter it at the same time…then they snickered, which made the hostess even more pissed off, because she had just been put down by a talking wolf lion animal thing, a man with a gunarm, and a man who was still smoking despite the no smoking signs. In fact, since we've been seated, eight different people have came up and told him that there was no smoking allowed. I swear I think I saw Cid nearly bite that last guy's hand off when he tried to steal his cigarette off his impromptu ash tray…which would be priceless china._

_God, we can never come back here again…_

_…Damn…we'll be lucky if we can even be able to go out in **public** again._

_'Hey! In Nanaki's defense, I would've called her a bitch too.'_

_In the past Zack! In the past…let's move on…please._

_"Since we're all done with the food, why don't you open your presents Tifa?" Yuffie asks, seemingly back to normal._

_…as far as normal goes for Yuffie._

_"You've already got the dress from me…and the shoes from Cid and Shera…whose next?" Yuffie asks._

_Oh thank you Yuffie, you kept her out of her room._

_"This is from me, Tifa." Barret hands a box over._

_"Thank you Barret."_

_She opens the package. It's a photo album. The front is carved from wood, decorated with lilies, roses, and butterflies._

_"It's gorgeous! Thanks, Barret."_

_He blushes, "It was Marlene's idea…"_

_Marlene and Denzel hold out their present next._

_"Open ours, Tifa!" Marlene grins, shoving the box into her hands._

_It's clumsily wrapped with newspaper that's been colored pink, green, and blue. Wow…those two really outdid themselves. There's a misshapen bow on top made from pipe cleaners. I'm impressed; they did this all by themselves. I asked if they wanted help, but they said they already had it figured out._

_She opens it and gasps. It's a notebook, but inside are various drawings and finger paintings the two have done in secret I guess. She loves it, I can tell, because she's smiling and gasping as she's flipping the pages. That was really sweet of them._

_The two look up, hopeful, "Do you like it?"_

_"I **love** it. It's wonderful, really."_

_Cait hands over a watch, rather unceremoniously. She takes it._

_"It's a clip on…clip it on to your belt…designed it myself…erm…does all sorts of nifty stuff…I guess I should've made a manual or something…erm…yeah…alarms, scheduler, um…just a bunch of stuff…oh, address book…erm, thermometer…"_

_"Does it tell time?" Tifa asks, laughing._

_Cait rolls his eyes, "**Yes**."_

_"Thanks, Reeve."_

_Nanaki slides a bag over to her. She opens it. There's a silver bracelet inside._

_"Oh, thank you Nanaki…it's beautiful." She says, clipping it on._

_Vincent slides an orange bubble package over to her._

_Ha! Guess we know who wrapped his._

_She opens it. It's a music box. Tifa adores music boxes. She gasps as she opens it, and the chimes clink on. Two little figures dance around in a circle. One's a ballerina…I really can't say if the guy is…I don't want to insult him…even if he is just a doll._

_'Dude…you just referred to him as a doll…I don't think that's any better.'_

_**Zack!**_

_"Thank you so much, Vincent…it's wonderful." She says, shutting the lid._

_"Cloud?! Where's your present?" Marlene squeals. "Don't tell me you forgot it?"_

_"No…it's back at the bar…and I didn't forget it."_

_"…to lazy to move it himself…" Barret mutters to Cid._

_Oh hell no! Tifa better not have heard that!_

_I send Barret an icy glare as he glances up. He challenges me back with his own glare. I'm thinking Tifa is oblivious, but still…that was uncalled for._

_And then there's a waiter moving towards our table. He's carrying a large cake with sparklers on it over to our table. Perfect timing._

_The man's holding it with on hand, a towel draped over his arm, the cake balanced on his splayed fingers. He moves with confidence, and he's probably done this a thousand times. I see it though, and I swear, I think that chair just moved on its own. His foot catches on the back leg of the chair, and I see his face contort into a look of shock and fear; he's just realized he's screwed himself over. He tries to save himself, but the towel slips off his arm, and it gets his feet even more tangled up, and then he's flying, and the chair's falling, and the cake's coming off the plate…the candles are like tiny fiery arrows of doom coming at my face…and the last thing I see is "Happy Birthday Tifa" written in yellow icing._

_Oh…oh hell…_

_"Cloud!"_

_Oh fu-_

_'Aerith! You told **me** not to interfere with anything! **You just threw a cake into Cloud's face**!'_

_'That was not me.'_

_-Ck me._

_'It had freaking sparklers on it Aerith! It was Tifa's birthday cake!'_

_'And that banana had a firecracker…and it was my **church**…what can I say…payback's a hostess.'_

_'Oh that was clever! Ha freaking ha!'_

_Why do cakes seem to be flying at my face lately…granted, the first one wasn't even **baked **yet…and it seems to be women who are throwing them at me…well, I mean, technically it was the waiter…but we all know what really happened._

_'You're just not the ladies man.'_

_'I had a crush on him.'_

_'What?!'_

_What?!_

_'Men are so easy.'_

_'…so that was a joke…right? Aerith? Baby? A joke, right? I mean…it's Spike…he's short and blonde and his spikes defy gravity…you couldn't have had a crush on him…'_

_Hey! I take offense to that!_

_'And he's a **cross dresser**, Aerith…please tell me it was just a joke…right? It was payback? It's a hostess? I thought it was funny, really! Baby?'_

_'Well…my work is done…tell Tifa I said happy birthday, Cloud!'_

_I feel Aerith disappear._

_'Aerith! Aerith wait! It was a joke, right? You love me, though, right? I don't care…I just need to know! Wait!'_

_And Zack's gone._

_Well, that's one good thing._

_"Oh my God, Cloud!" Tifa's above me, shouting._

_Damn…I think I fell out of my chair._

_"Spike, man! You okay?" I hear Barret shout._

_"Sir, I am so sorry about that, honestly…I don't have a clue…how that happened…I mean…I s-swear, I t-think that chair m-moved on its own…" That must be the waiter._

_"Ack! You mean to tell me this place is haunted?" Marlene screeches._

_"Awesome!" Denzel shouts._

_"Cloud?" Tifa asks again._

_She sounds a lot closer now. Someone is rubbing at my face with a piece of cloth, and I'm still on my back, but it seems that all of the candles have gone out._

_"What the hell was that?" I hear Cid scream._

_I'm pretty sure there are some other workers here, and now they're probably feeling the wrath of Cid._

_"Oh damn…it's that stupid 'No pets' hostess." I hear Cid curse._

_I just want to see again!_

_Light! Tifa! It's heaven!_

_Oh…is she snickering?_

_"Oh Cloud…are you okay?" She asks._

_I manage a stiff nod._

_And…she bursts into a fit of laughter._

_What._

_The._

_Hell._

_I just took a burning cake of fury in my freaking face, and she's laughing? How beat up is that?_

_"-cking threw the damn cake at 'im! He didn't stand a snowball's chance in bloody hell! You gonna pay for this!" Cid still yelling._

_Tifa's pulling me to my feet now; and everyone turns and laughs._

_What?_

_"What?" I ask, and Yuffie holds up a mirror._

_The edge of one of my spikes has been burnt, my nose is clogged with icing, and I believe those are burn spots on my cheeks…little circles of red splotch my face._

_"Excuse me…but where is the rest room?" I ask, and the hostess points._

_I walk away, head held high in dignity._

_'Dude…I freaking **told **you…she'd bring heaven down in a fiery wrath of doom…I told you…'_

_Shouldn't you be trying to win back your love? And since when does a cake count as heaven? I get the fiery wrath of doom though…_

_'Have you tried their cake? It's awesome!...well…I mean, trying it as in eating it…not wearing it…'_

_Go away._

_'Tell Tifa happy birthday for me!'_

_Oh yeah…real happy…especially for me! I had happy smack me in the face just a minute it ago!_

_Never again…_

_I guess Zack was right about Aerith and doom..._

_Apparently there is no wrath like that of Aerith's._

**A/N: **GAH! honestly! This thing would not upload! _Please _tell me you caught 'Payback's a bitch' ...you know, they were calling the hostess one...well, hopefully that cleared it up for you if you didn't. I have been stuck in a rut...in case you couldn't tell...I'm so battling myself with the ending of Come Together...and I was just waiting for something to come to my head for this...Tincent, so glad you're a fan...and blowing off cleaning is always a good way to spend time. Thanks so much for teh awesome review...and to Rend, don't worry...I caught the magic kiss thing...it worked wonders on me when I was a kid...and you think Cloud had it hard before...muhahaha! At least cake flinging is better than Sephiroth popping out at random...and you'll have to excuse Cloud not sneaking a peak...as to the fact I am a girl...I did not pick up on that...slipped my mind...we'll just say he was working up to it, but Tifa didn't give him time...So anyways! Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! You all freaking rock my socks...I might sneak in Zack and Aerith next chappie...but they may be out for the count for a bit...they're exhausted...especially with that moving the chair thing...honestly, who knew Aerith's wrath was of flying cakes? Makes perfect sense to me...


	26. Melody Of Delights

_Melody of Delights_

_We made it back to the bar...relatively unscathed...except for me of course. Why do I always get the bad end of the deal? Man, I have the crappiest luck...or maybe it's bad karma...although you'd figure killing Sephiroth **twice**, that's right...count 'em...two times...would count for something...but noooo...Man...I must've really messed up in a past life or something._

'_Dude, you have no idea...'_

_Zack! I thought you were gone!_

'_At that comment, I cannot stay away...you seriously...have no idea...'_

_How bad was I?_

'_...um...does the father to JENOVA count as anything involving bad karma?'_

_Wait...what?!_

'_You know what they say...it's all the parent's fault.'_

_...wait...how do you even know that?_

'_All questions are answered in death.'_

_Shut the hell up Zack._

_Thank you._

"_Well...that was an adventure," Tifa states as she flops down onto the couch. _

_The rest of the gang make an assorted pile here and there. I sit down beside of Tifa and tip my head back. What a freaking night._

_Then there's a knock at the door._

_Oh no, what now?_

_Yuffie yanks open the door._

"_Reeve!" she yells, surprised._

_The rest of us bolt up, looking at the door. It is in fact, Reeve. I glance towards Cait Sith whose sitting silently and motionless. Yep...then he's definitely not on._

"_Reeve...I thought..." Tifa stutters._

"_Well...after seeing that fiasco with Cloud and the cake...well..what's a birthday without a cake?" he asks, holding out a white box._

"_Omagosh! Cake!" Yuffie squeals reaching for the box._

_I flinched; somehow, someway, I just know that cake is heading for my face._

_Reeve extends his leg, putting distance between himself and Yuffie, "Back off psycho."_

_Tifa stands and takes the box. The group follows, their desire for birthday cake finally fulfilled._

'_See, I knew it would all work out.'_

'_That's no excuse Aerith.'_

'_Don't sass me...I'm the Flower Girl...the maiden...'_

'_Oh, don't you start on one of those high and mighty 'I saved the planet' speeches.'_

'_No but seriously Cloud...we can't stay any longer.'_

_Why? You guys have been saying goodbye and popping back up all night long._

'_We've really used up too much time...but come and visit us at the church, okay?' Aerith replies._

'_Yeah...just don't bring any bananas.'_

'_We'll still be watching...so you're not alone...'_

_I know._

'_Bye Cloud!'_

'_Yeah, see ya Spike-o.'_

_This time I feel their presence completely wash away. It leaves me kind of empty filling. Granted, they were getting annoying...especially since I was the only one who could hear their antics...but still, I miss those two._

_I sit silent, almost waiting for Zack to come back with some quirky comment._

_He doesn't, and it kind of depresses me._

"_Don't want any cake?"_

_I look up. Tifa is leaning against the door frame._

"_Can't say I blame you after what happened tonight," she giggles, "You probably have a morbid fear of cakes now."_

_I stare, and then sigh. "No, I want cake...just thinking."_

_She walks over, and sits on my lap. "About those two?"_

"_Hmm."_

"_So it was then?" she asks, smiling. "I could feel them...but they're gone for now, aren't they?"_

"_Yeah...but I'm sure Zack will be back soon enough to annoy me."_

"_Oh don't act like you don't like it."_

_Can she honestly read minds? I'm beginning to wonder._

"_Let's go get some cake then," I state._

"_Okay," she says, and kisses me lightly on the lips before pulling me up._

_It's later in the night I learn that the gang plans on staying tonight, and tomorrow night. I groan, burying my face in my hands. Honestly, I really begin to wonder why I missed these guys._

_Then, as Yuffie does a somersault over the table and plows into Cid, I remember why._

_They're all drunk, though Tifa has opted not to drink. Yuffie whined at her for a while, asking why, and she just shrugged her shoulders. She replied that we still had tomorrow. I don't get it either. I mean, it is Tifa's birthday. She should be celebrating, but I know in her own way she is. I've only had a couple drinks, not enough to affect me that much. I'm smiling more though, especially when Cid retaliates in a storm of curses and grabs Yuffie's ankle. He then proceeds to pull her down with a loud bang, Barret watching on with loud laughter. Shera slaps Cid across the back of the head, and he gives her an innocent look._

_It's an hour later that they've all passed out around the living room. I'm sitting on the chair, a glass of whisky in my hand. Tifa is collecting empty glasses, piling them on a tray. Currently, she's prying a glass from Barret's sleeping form. I stand slowly as she deposits the glasses into the sink. Slipping up behind her quietly, I slip my arm around her waist and press my lips against the back of her neck._

"_**Cloud**."_

"_What?"_

"_They're others..."_

"_Who are drunk, and asleep."_

_She sighs, but she's smiling._

"_It's your day off...why are you cleaning?" I ask, prying a glass from her fingers._

"_Technically it's the day after my day off..."_

"_Well, I guess I'll have to give you a belated birthday present."_

"_Cloud...you've already done so much for me...what more could you possibly have?"_

"_You'll just have to see."_

_I place my hands over her eyes, and lead her slowly up the stairs. She giggles as she stumbles over the first step, and I catch her._

"_Shh." I'm smiling, big._

_I've changed a lot lately, I know this. And I'm glad I have. I'm glad I've changed. Granted, I'm still not exactly your most happy-go-lucky guy with smiles all the time, but I do smile more. I laugh more. I enjoy life now; I'm finally happy. I'm relaxing, and enjoying my life, which is a first. It's been awhile since I've been able to enjoy my life without the fate of the world hanging over my head._

_Still, I know I'm not relaxing as much I could, and I know Tifa, and Barret, Cid, Vincent, and everyone else isn't relaxing; not near as much as we deserve, at least. I know that they feel the same as I do. We're all wound up deep inside, just waiting to spring into action the moment something goes wrong again. We're all still on edge, and there's no denying that, especially after the geostigma incident. In the back of our heads, we still tell ourselves there's a way for him to come back, even though logically it wouldn't make sense. The bigger part tells us only in our nightmares. Still..._

_Tifa hisses as she stubs her toe, and I snap back into reality. Pushing the door to her room open, I lead her inside, one hand still over her eyes, and the other on the small of her back. I kick the door shut and flip on the lights. _

"_Keep your eyes closed." I warn as I release her._

_She nods her head yes fervently, and then her brow scrunches up._

"_Cloud! Where did you go?" she hisses, holding her arms out in front of her._

_I grin as she stumbles across the room._

"_Fine, I guess we'll do it this way then." I slip the sheet off of her present._

_I walk swiftly back over to her and grab her outstretched hand. She grips mine tightly as I lead her towards her gift. _

"_Here," I say softly as I lay her hand on the gift._

_She graces the wood with her fingertips, trying to figure out what it is. Her hand slips down the smooth wood, and onto cool ivory, and her brow scrunches. She instinctively presses down, and a cool sound resonates around the room. She gasps._

_Tifa slowly opens her eyes, and gasps again. She meets my eyes and smiles big._

"_A piano? You got me a **piano**? Cloud!" She flings her arms around my shoulder for a moment, then returns to the piano._

"_I can't believe...Cloud! You spent too much! I mean...don't get me wrong I love it, but honestly! You're spoiling me," she says, her fingertips gracing the keys._

"_It's not just from me...well, it was my idea...but everyone chipped in a bit."_

"_Is that what Barret meant when he was talking about how you were too lazy to move it yourself?" she asks, sitting down on the bench._

"_You heard that?"_

_She grins, her fingers arching._

"_I love it Cloud, I love it. I can't...I can't even begin to thank you. I honestly don't know how..."_

"_Play something for me," I say, sitting down beside of her._

"_What?" she asks, bewildered._

"_You can thank me that way."_

_She smiles softly, "I'm going to warn you, it's been a while."_

_She lays her fingers out on the keys and begins a soft, slow melody. As the speed picks up a bit, I slip my arm around her waist loosely, and she grins. She's happy._

_It's her neck I kiss first, and it tickles her, she giggles softly, her fingers slipping for a moment. She's back on track again, but I kiss her at the base of her ear, and that makes her squeal; she laughs as I kiss her jaw, and she's completely given up on trying to play._

"_I thought...you wanted me to play something for you," she says as I kiss her cheek._

"_You did already."_

"_It wasn't even finished." _

_I pull back for a moment, wondering if I insulted her, but instead she grins and kisses me._

_At some point and time we ended up on her bed._

**A/N: **Before you even ask, no they did not have sex. I really like this chapter, it's sweet. AND YES...Zack and Aerith have decided to retire for abit...it maybe a while before they surface again...OMG 148 reviews?! YOU GUYS FREAKING ROCK...seriously, I love you all. I give you...a hug...that's right, through the computer...because I'm so good, I can do that and it actually works...uh huh. Meili, enjoy translating! I'm still really honored by that. and the banana idea?...erm...real life experience?...heh...heh...it wasn't me! No seriously...it wasn't.

**Actually...here's a real gift for everyone...quotes for down the road chapters:**

**...Do you know that little pressure point on the back of your neck?**

**...Guess where that bloody shoe hit.**

**I dropped like a bloody stone.**

_And Then!_

_**Why are my clothes against me?!**_

_Come on you guys...that's enough in itself._

_Till Next time!_


	27. Every Morning

_Every Morning_

_It was her scent. It was every where; it didn't matter which way I turned. I could smell her in my skin, in the blankets and pillows surrounding me. I forced my eyes open, wincing at the morning light streaming in through the blinds. I sit up slowly, rubbing the sleep from my eyes and yawning. I cast my eyes around the room before me, and smile at my thoughts._

_What would it be like to wake up here every morning?_

_Tifa keeps her room clean. She's got a red, soft rug on the hard wood floor. In a corner are a dresser and a vanity, filled with assorted knick knacks. The wall is covered with various finger paintings done by Marlene and Denzel. To my right is a big leather seat, and a bookshelf that's currently over flowing. It's right beside the window. The piano sits to the left of her bed, and it looks right there. Next to her bed is her night table, complete with phone charger, clock, and her pearl earrings. I guess she slipped those off sometime in the night then._

_Also on the table, there are photos. Some are more recent, like the one taken just after the Geostigma incident. There's one of just me and her taken a few weeks ago, and one of us with the children. The others are with the various members of AVALANCHE. One however, catches my attention. It's of her and Aerith, and I find I don't remember this picture. Course, the reason why is probably because she never had the heart to show it to me. In the background, I can see myself burning a wig; Aerith and Tifa however, are holding up this purple dress laughing. Actually, they're more or less holding each other up, arms wrapped around each others shoulders, and cradling laugh-ached stomachs, tears streaming from their eyes. I feel my mouth draw into a grim line. I thought I had gotten rid of all the evidence of that moment._

_I glance at Tifa, still sleeping peacefully._

_Her bed is nice and soft; all white complete with this feathery comforter. Little feathers decorate her bed that escaped the confining fabric. There's some caught in her hair, and I sit there for a moment plucking them from her hair. _

_"Good morning." I hear her mutter as she snuggles deeper into her covers._

_My hand jerks. I didn't even realize she was awake, and she giggles._

_"Did I frighten you Cloud?" She mumbles, her eyes still closed._

_She's smiling though._

_"No." I reply, "Although this picture did."_

_I don't even have to say which one. Her eyes fly open in horror. She looks up at me where I'm sitting, trying to seem innocent._

_"Heh…What picture?" She giggles._

_"Yeah, what picture…you probably managed to get a picture of me getting creamed in the face by an out of control cake last night."_

_I see her blush a deep red, and I swallow._

_"You didn't…really…"_

_"Well…**I** didn't."_

_"Then who did?"_

_"Erm…it was some woman…she…had a camera. Heh…"_

_"You won't be receiving a copy, will you?" I ask._

_"Erm…is it okay that I gave her our address?"  
_

_I sigh, "Why don't you just go ahead and start up a photo album consisting of 'Cloud's embarrassing moments'."_

_She scoffs, "Well how do you think I felt? You think I liked being the center of attention after my boyfriend got hit upside the head with my birthday cake?"_

_"What did you just say?"_

_"Well, I mean…after you ran off to the bathroom like the coward you **are**," She states, jabbing me in the chest. "I had to do clean-up…and you missed the fight Cid got into with the no pets hostess…"_

_"No…not that."_

_"What?"_

_"Did you just call me your boyfriend?"_

_"..."_

_I think she just squeaked._

_I watch as her hand flies up to her mouth, and she turns pink in embarrassment. _

_I grab her hand, "It isn't a bad thing, you know? Unless you don't want me to be your boyfriend."_

_"**Cloud**!" She shouts, swiftly yanking her pillow out and smacking me with it._

_"Hey!"_

_She giggles as feathers fly, and suddenly I'm losing my balance, and then…_

_BAM!_

_"Oh! Cloud! Are you okay?" She halfway crawls out of the bed, her hands on the floor, but her legs still on the bed._

_"My hip…" I mutter._

_She giggles, "You sound like an old man."_

_I glare up at her, and I'm about to say something when I hear a voice._

_"Tifa!" _

_I pale…she pales…_

_It's Barret._

_"Oh **God**…" She hisses._

_You must understand the predicament we are currently in._

_It will be quite obvious to Barret that I spent in the night in Tifa's room._

_It will be quite awkward when he finds us together in her bed with nothing but our underwear on…ahem…_

_IF HE THINKS WE DID SOMETHING WITH LITTLE MARLENE NEXT DOOR HE'LL FREAKING KILL US…well, me is more like it. _

_He sees Tifa as his daughter…now, how does a father react when he finds his little girl in bed with a man? Yeah…you guys just figure that one out._

_You see, he'll think something…ahem…sexual…happened…and we aren't married…and if little Marlene was to walk in on her two guardians…in a compromising situation…_

_Let's just not go there._

_I do the only thing that seems logical: I push Tifa back up into the bed, and roll beneath her bed. _

_"Tifa!" Barret yells again._

_Tifa covers herself with her blanket before answering, "Yea?"_

_"I'm coming in."_

_Man, what a freaking heathen…doesn't even ask._

_I hear the floorboard creak as he enters the room, and I hold my breath, grateful for Tifa's cleanliness. This would be a whole lot harder if there was dust to make me sneeze._

_"You seen Cloud?"_

_"Uh…no…" She sputters. "I think he went for a walk early this morning."_

_"Hmm…cause he ain't in his bed and it don look like no one slept there."_

_I can practically imagine Barret crossing his arms, and giving Tifa a piercing look._

_"Well…I can't really say, Barret." She replies hotly._

_"And what was that thump I heard earlier?"_

_"Huh?"_

_"It sounded like someone fell of the bed."_

_"Oh…that was me." She rushes._

_"You fell of the bed?" He asks dubiously._

_"It happens to the best of us…" She laughs nervously._

_"Uh huh…Maybe you got yourself rats or sumtin…lemme check for ya."_

_Oh…we are so screwed!_

_I watch Barret's feet as he drops to one knee._

_"Barret…that's really not necessary." Tifa's saying, and I see her weight shift on the bed._

_"Barret!" She hisses._

_Okay, Cloud, you can do this if you just time it right. Wait for it…wait…wait…now!_

_I roll out as silent as possible, grateful for the bed skirt that concealed me, and is now doing so again. _

_I sit up quickly and quietly once out from beneath the bed, spotting Barret's hunched up form on the other side of the bed. I stand quickly, dashing towards the door on my tip toes. I can't make it though, as I hear Barret shifting to stand. I dart behind the open door and the wall and hold my breath again._

_"Any rats, Barret?" Tifa asks._

_"No, Tifa…no rats." I hear him growl._

_I listen as his heavy footsteps move closer to the door, and he pauses at the frame, pulling the door slightly closing._

_"Just one thing, Tifa…"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Since when do you sleep with just a bra?"_

_Oh…hell…_

_And I thought I was screwed._

_I dare to peek out, realizing that Tifa's dropped her blanket, revealing her bra clad figure…and she's now turning blood red…from embarrassment no doubt…but there's something in her eyes._

_Barret if you wish to live, you better move fast._

_Man, I think he sees it too, because I haven't seen him move that fast since the AVALANCHE days…and that was when being chased down and hunted and fighting deadly monsters._

_This was just Tifa chucking a clock at his head._

_It crashes loudly against the closed door, and I can't help but let out a sigh of relief. I bend over picking up the clock which now holds a dent, realizing Tifa's hiding herself beneath her blanket. Walking over, I replace the clock and sit down beside of her._

_"Go away." Her voice is muffled by the blanket._

_"Why?"_

_"It's your entire fault."_

_"My fault?"  
_

_"If you hadn't fallen off the bed…"_

_"If you hadn't smacked me with pillows…"_

_"If you hadn't gotten in my bed…"_

_"If you weren't so damn irresistible…"_

_Oh that was smooth, Strife…smooth like butter. Mad props._

_I see her eyes poke out from the edge of the blanket. I can see a smile in them, and I know that's why she's hiding her mouth. She's still trying to act mad._

_I yank the blanket down quickly, and capture her mouth with my own._

_As we fall back onto her bed, a thought crosses my mind._

_Even if I did have to play a deadly game of hide and seek with Barret, I wouldn't mind waking up like this every morning._

**A/N: **I reiterate...no sex...just fun...yet...I have been C2'd...wow! I have been added to Cloud and Tifa...wow...I want to thank thenolifequeen for that. the story went up 20 reviews last chapter...wow...you guys...just...are awesome! I LOVE YOU ALL...And I just had to make a scene where Barret acted all fatherly...I dunno, I liked it. I have decided to keep Let It Be a seperate story line...I want to thank _everyone_ who reviewed with their opinion...it really meant alot to me. So hopefully I'll update that soon! I just posted a ...depressing oneshot(alabaster)...so...if you're reading this...you probably want happy, not sad...but still, I want to thank those who faved/reviewed that one...if you click on my homepage, you'll see it's my deviantart page...i drew a quick sketch from a scene in this story...hopefully I'll be doing more of that...and I can give you guys real gifts for your awesomeness...later loves! OH! And don't think I'm stopping Diaries just because of Let It Be...no sir, no way!


	28. Of Really Big 'Effin Puddles

_Of Really Big 'Effin Puddles_

_In retrospect...**maybe **this wasn't such a good idea._

_As incredibly out of character as this is going to sound...you'd expect me, as a swordsman, to have some sort of grace...a bit of finesse if you will, in bouts of physical activity._

_Thank God Zack isn't here to hear that one..._

_Moving on..._

_...You'd expect...after all the crap I've been through...after all the time I've spent hiking around this God forsaken planet, jumping through the air, killing things and whatnot...I'd formed some type of ability to do things quietly. Now, for some things...this is true. For others...however..._

_Hmm..._

_How is it that I cannot successfully climb in and out of windows with out falling flat on my face?_

_I mean, it's not like I've never climbed in and out of a window before, so I'm trying to figure out the problem. I can do it quietly, I know I can. I've done it before. _

_I think the problem is the fact that I **know** I have to be quiet...if not..._

_Well, let's just say Barret would easily find himself a rat._

_Getting out of Tifa's room was easy enough...after a two story drop into a dumpster._

_Good times, let me tell ya, good times._

_I used the drain pipe to scale up to my room, which actually wasn't too disastrous. The problem was getting in the room. I was sitting there, scrabbling to get to the windowsill, my arm stretched out, and trying to stay balanced on the pipe with my legs. My fingers scratched the sill, and then I finally got a good grip..._

_...But I let go too soon._

_And there I was...dangling from my bedroom window above the street in my boxers at twelve o'clock on a Saturday morning. I'm pretty sure I heard more than one whistle from behind me...err, below me._

_I'm pretty sure there will be some scandalous rumors going around the town for a while. Better warn Tifa. Somehow, I manage to scramble into my room, and I ended up rolling over the windowsill, and landing softly on my feet._

_And then my face._

_Alright...that was good...not too bad._

_Crap._

_Barret left my door open. I can hear footsteps coming down the hall._

_Of all the excuses...why did Tifa have to pick me going on a walk?_

_So I roll...that's right._

_I, Cloud Stife, rolled across the floor to my door. I couldn't close it, for fear of someone seeing, so I had to hide behind the door as I did in Tifa's room. I listen to the footsteps stop outside of my door, and then there's a head poking in the door._

"_Cloud?" Tifa hisses._

_I poke my head out, and she lets out the beginning of a scream._

"_Be quiet!" I hiss back._

_She slaps me on my arm._

"_Don't scare me!" _

"_Sorry, I thought you were Barret coming to kill me."_

"_Well...I thought you were Barret!"_

"_Well, I'm not. Just...listen, just shut the door, I'll change...climb out the window...and come in saying I've just got done with my walk, okay?" I say._

_This is way to difficult._

"_Okay...oh, and Cloud?"_

"_Yeah?" I ask, rubbing my eyes._

"_Don't fall this time, there isn't a dumpster to catch you."_

_My eyes shoot open, "You saw that?"_

"_Mm hmm..." she kisses me on the lips once. "Now get changed."_

_And she's out the door, and closing it. _

_I dress quickly, ignoring my fowl stench, and climb back out the window. I scale down the pipe rather easily, not attracting much attention, and then made my way for the door. I walk in as if nothing's happened, and cast my eyes around the bar. Tifa's at the stove, cooking. Yuffie is lounging on the couch, Marlene and Denzel hanging on her every word. Barret has got his head lying down on a table, and Vincent and Nanaki are listening to Cid ramble about something. Shera comes down the steps and looks up._

"_Well, there he is!"_

"_Cloud!" Denzel shouts, and runs up._

"_Where were ya Cloud?" He asks me, pulling on my shirt._

_I pat his head, and smirk slightly, "I went for a walk."_

_I hear Tifa clear her throat, and out of the corner of my eye, I see Barret tense at his table. _

"_See, I told you there was nothing to worry about." Tifa stated, walking over._

_She pulled on my arm slightly, before kissing my cheek and returning to the stove. _

_Denzel backs away slowly, his nose wrinkling. "What's that smell?"_

"_Erm..."_

_Cid walks over to me, and puts his hand on my shoulder._

"_Um...Cid?"_

"_Walk with me." He states, and pulls me out the door._

_I think I've just been kidnaped. He pulls me out onto the street, and I'm regretting I let him...because I think there are still some people hanging around to see if they'll get another show. _

"_Um...Cid? I just took a walk, can I go back in now?"_

"_Right...you took a walk..."_

"_...Um...yes?" Why did that come out as a question?_

"_Cloud...I'll let you go back in...in fact, we don't even if have to go for a walk...as long as you answer one question for me."_

"_O...kay..." Should I fear agreeing to this?_

"_Now, the question I have for you...is why exactly...hmm, how can I put this delicately?" He scratches his chin._

_Cid? Delicate? Come on._

"_What?"_

"_Just tell me this. Why is it, the first thing I see upon returning from purchasing some cigarettes...is your scrawny ass in your damn boxers hanging out your 'effin bed room window?"_

_Why is nothing in life simple?_

_Why? Someone tell me please. I need to know. I need to figure out what the reason is that I allow myself to suffer through these people's antics._

_Hey buddy, that was your own antic...You were the one that climbed into bed with Tifa last night._

_Okay...answer me this...Why the **hell** does my conscience sound like Zack?_

"_Cloud? Hello Cloud..."_

"_Oh...um..."_

"_Now see here...Barret came to me this morning, askin if I had seen ya. I told him I hadn't. He asked if I'd seen ya after I got back, too. Now, why would Barret be asking for ya?"_

"_Because...he couldn't...find me?"_

"_Good...good...so now, why was it exactly that he couldn't find ya?"_

"_Because...I wasn't...in my room?"_

"_Right right...now, I just have to put two and two together, and say...Barret had something to do with the little show you gave everyone, correct?"_

"_Erm...I guess so?"_

"_And the reason he couldn't find you was because?"_

"_...I went for a walk...?"_

"_Now Cloud...it isn't nice to lie...it also would be nice to take a shower, especially after that plunge into the dumpster you took."_

"_You **saw** that?"_

"_AH! So you **do** have emotions! No...sadly, I didn't...Shera did. Now me, me and Shera were talking...and well, I figure you aren't telling me the truth. What was the reason you were climbing out around the house half-naked for? And for the love of God, please tell me you put on clean boxers, cause you **stink**."_

"_Erm...I said I was walking...and yes, I did."_

"_In your boxers?"_

"_My clothes...got wet...I fell...in a lake..."_

"_In a lake, Cloud?"_

"_Yes...well...actually...it was a very big puddle."_

_His eyebrows raise in amusement._

"_How big?"_

"_Lake size..."_

"_A lake size puddle...Cloud...we haven't had any rain for at least a week."_

"_Erm..."_

"_That's right...just keep digging yourself deeper." He crosses his arms, "Now, let's try this again. Cloud...why were you climbing around the house?"_

"_I spent the night with Tifa."_

"_There! Now that wasn't so hard, now was it?" He's smiling, but I see some malicious glint to his eye._

"_Erm...no..."_

"_Okay then! Cloud...try and understand...Barret, he's got two daughters, not one. Marlene...and Tifa, understand?" _

_Cid talks with his hands...that frightens me. I'm afraid those hands are about to clench around my throat._

"_Yes."_

"_And, now...Barret is a good friend of mine. He's a lot like me; I ain't met a man who could compete with my fowl mouth in years! But he can!" He laughs here._

_I give a nervous laugh._

_And then he goes deathly silent, "And now, I as a good friend to Barret...I don't like to see a man messing around with my best bud's little girl."_

"_Well Tifa isn't exactly little- _

"_Quiet Cloud...an adult is talking here."_

_Okay then._

"_Now Cloud," A hand on my shoulder again, "I like the idea of you and Tifa...I really do...God knows it's been something **all** of us have been waitin for...bout time if I do say so myself...but!"_

_God, there's always a but._

"_And I reiterate...but! I don't want you to mess this up. And whose to say what could happen if you broke poor little Tifa's heart."_

_Me? Break Tifa's heart? What the?_

"_I mean, I know Barret would have a few choice words...and you do realize that's metal his arm is made of? And I myself have been known to shove my spear up other guys asses when I catch em looking at Shera."_

_Okay...obviously he does not get how wrong that just sounded._

"_But I like you Cloud, and so does Barret...so we don't want to do those things to you, get it?"_

"_Um...yes?"_

"_Good!" He smiles, clapping my shoulder once, "I'm glad we had this talk."_

"_Um..." he's walking towards the door. "You do realize if Tifa ever heard you call you little, she'd rip your legs off at the knees to show you what's really little?"_

_Cid shivers, "Yes I am damn well aware of that...and that is why this conversation is strictly staying between you and me...got it?"_

"_Yes." Well, that's a relief._

"_You might be able to hide from Barret, but you can't hide from me. I'm watching you."_

_My goodness, how corny can you get? Is the whole pointing at me and the your eyes thing really necessary?_

"_Oh, and one more thing."_

"_What?"_

"_Take some responsibility for your actions...show a little respect to your woman."_

"_Well..I do Cid."_

"_No...well, I guess this is the best way to say it." Cid opens the door._

"_Cid?" _

_And I watch him as he yells out across the room, "Hey guys! Guess what! Me and Shera are getting 'effin married!"_

**A/N: **Another crisis averted! BWHAHAH! Please pardon the late update. I've been so busy w/ work and exams...I find it hard to write, and whenever I write diaries, I need inspiration. And I just wasn't getting anything. My muse died for diaries these past couple days...but fear not! I revived him!...he's purple...and that's all you need to know. Man, I loved writing this...I loved writing how Cid was basically walking Cloud through his words...twas awesome. And to **Ghostly** I feel you need this explanation. You'd be suprised at how many people over/under react to the title of boyfriend/girlfriend...esepcially after stuff they've done. I know people like this...and it frightens me dearly. And yes **Rend** Cloud is pretty confident...but after saving the world twice...a little confidence couldn't hurt him, right? Though Cid did sort of put him in his place this chappie. **Sabith, **my fav. line too...I'm giving myself mad props for that line...man, that was cheesy. Glad to welcome **nova dragon** and **sephiroth2021** to the wagon. Seph, I'm just glad you discovered it period! THANKS to everyone for reviews! I LOVE YOU GUYS...will we break the 200 mark? GO FOR IT! Tee hee...mes love it when you review! Till next time! farewell my loves! Fare well.


	29. Of 'Effin Cursed Marriages

**For Future Reference: **'Effing, 'Effin, Effin, Effing...are to be thought of as the zomgoshes...**F BOMB**...FREAK OUT! I just don't want to corrupt the younglings...yet...

_Of Cursed 'Effin Marriages_

"_I will string you up by your damn effin entrails if what you just said isn't true, Cid." _

_Well...Cid was right...Barret **does **have a mouth to rival his own. That was only mildly violent...and in front of Marlene. Ye gods! What has the world come to?_

_Cid sighs, "You don't 'effin believe me, dumbass?" _

_Shera's in the corner blushing; there's an assortment of reactions. Reeve had just descended the steps to hear Cid's glorious announcements. Nanaki's ears perked up, Yuffie jumped up and down and then hugged Shera; Denzel was making a face, and Marlene was exclaiming about dresses. I believe I even saw a 'shift' to Vincent's eyebrows. I think they raised upward. Amazing. Cid got reaction from Vincent. Props to Cid, mad props. I think that's my new favorite word...props..._

_But the most interesting reaction is Tifa's. She's frozen. In fact, her spoon of soup is still frozen in the air between herself and the bowl. It's the only noise in the now silent room...drip...drip...drip._

_She recovers though, returning the spoon to the bowl, and pausing for a moment. _

"_Well...I think it's safe to say that's the only marriage announcement that's ever been told with curse words." She merely states, and goes back to stirring the soup._

_The group sits there a moment, digesting what she just said. Yuffie's the first to let out a snigger, then Barret coughs in an attempt to cover his smile. Nanaki buries his face in his paws, and even Vincent sinks deeper behind his high collar. _

_And then Yuffie's cackling with laughter on the floor, gripping her sides. Shera follows her, bent over in the middle, tears watering up in her eyes. Marlene and Denzel are thoroughly confused, and Barret just pats Marlene's head and laughs. Cid is looking angry, however...and Tifa doesn't seem to be laughing at all._

"_Now wait just one damn minute, jackasses!"_

_And more laughter ensues. Nanaki even lets out a light chuckle. Vincent is silent, but he lets out a 'hmph' and I swear I think I see amusement in his eyes._

"_What's so damn funny? I'm getting married! Shouldn't you be congratulating me?"_

_And now my mouth is twitching. Tifa's got a smile, but she's trying to hide it behind her hair. Everyone's rolling about with laughter by now...excluding Vincent, of course. Laughter is above him. Duh._

_Once again...thank God Zack isn't here._

_I'm even having to brace myself against the doorframe. What a morning this has turned out to be. I went from playing mission impossible, to getting scolded by Cid of all people, to this...Cid getting married. Now that's a laugh in itself._

"_Well...I'm sure it'd be different if it were **anyone** else, am I right?" He barks._

_The answer is laughter._

"_OF course it would be! Can't take Cid serious, can ya? No sirrie, because just look at little miss Yuff over here laughing her scrawny little ninja ass off!"_

_Yuffie's frozen on the floor, a look of death in Cid's direction._

"_She's just soooo serious...and nobody would laugh at **all** when she announced her engagement to Mr. I'm-not-really-a-vampire-just-manic-depressive over there."_

_Oh...oh snap. Vincent will kill you Cid...make you dead. You'll never get married!_

_Okay, but I'm laughing now, that last line cracked me up._

"_And noble Sir Barret here! Tah! I like to see the day Elmyra will accept his deceleration of love!"_

_OH...he did not just say that...at least Yuffie's laughing again, and Vincent doesn't look so peeved off. He's back to his usual pissed off self. That's good._

_Marlene jumps up, "Dad's marrying auntie Elmyra?"_

"_CID!" Barret barks._

_Looks as if Barret could do some serious physical harm...and may even do what he stated earlier to Cid._

"_And of course the day Reeve hooks himself up with a nice Turk...we'll all just sip some damn fricken tea and rejoice."_

_I...I don't even have words for that._

_I can't even express the look on Reeve's face._

_Priceless...that's all I have to say._

"_And they can even have a double wedding with Nanaki! It'll be great! The day he marries a common house cat mixed with a wolf whose somehow miraculously managed to figure out how to talk...or at least meow yes or no."_

_Oh...Dude...you do realize Nanaki had teeth, claws...and a flaming tail? Not someone you want to bash._

_So Reeve joins back in on the laughter...everyone's laughing currently except Nanaki...as he's been Cid's latest victim._

_Oh...oh no._

"_And the day Mr. I-will-fricken-impale-your-ass-with-my-giant-gravity-defying-spikes..." _

_Do I need to even say who he's talking about?_

"_...Announces his engagement with Ms. High-and-Mighty-Perfect-Mother over there..."_

_Cid! Cid! No! Cid! Stop!_

"_... we'll all just sit around and laugh about the time Barret almost found them in bed together."_

_Squeak._

_I'm not sure if that came from Tifa or me._

_Silence..._

_...pure..._

_...sheer..._

_...silence._

_After all that work! After all that trash! The humiliation! The embarrassment! THE BIG EFFING PUDDLE! You just told Barret that Tifa and I were in bed together! I didn't start this! What the hell, man? What the hell!_

_I can't...I just can't look at Barret. I swear, his eyes will kill me. Oh...fear...oh fear._

"_Well...actually..." Vincent states._

_His voice makes everyone's head dart up._

"_That doesn't sound too farfetched."_

"_Yeah...I could see that." Yuffie states._

"_That is rather plausible." Nanaki replies._

"_It'd be quite the celebration." Shera nods her head._

"_And I could bring cake." Reeve adds._

"_Cloud and Tifa get married?!" Marlene exclaims._

"_So then I'd have a mom **and** a dad?" Denzel asks, incredulous._

_With each comment I see Tifa bow her head further down behind her hair, and with each comment I can feel the heat on my face rising._

_I've got to be about as red as a tomato right now._

"_As long as there aren't any **rats** involved," Barret states, crossing his arms, a sneer across his face. "I'm alright with it."_

_I think I've just died._

_I mean, what do you say to that? What is it exactly that you say to your friends agreeing on a marriage proposal you haven't even thought of? I mean, my God...they just found out we were a couple yesterday and already they're planning our wedding!_

_There is only one solution to this._

_I turn around and walk out the door._

_I just need a breather here._

_No, my friends did not just discuss my wedding._

_No, they are not laughing at me right now._

_No, I am perfectly fine._

_Yep...just fine..._

_...well...actually..._

_Nope._

_Shit._

**A/N: **Short, I know. Cloud cursed! He is thinking there at the end...and even if we are in his mind...he _still remains mysterious._ Only Cloud can do that. And yes...Cid did curse in the last chapter...and with that note up there, it makes it official. And for those who were like...Cid...care? I know, farfetched, but he got his revenge...and that always evens the playing field. Woo! We broke 200! You guys rock. **hello to new comers! **like Sparx Alchemist...that was quite the review, thank you. And **REND NO!** I am not losing interest! I had a momentary lapse...writers block would've been a more appropriate term, I suppose. But I just have to be in one mood to write this story, and same goes for others. Anyways! And poster-fic? WOW...I won't object. I got C'2d again! Silent Men and the women who love them...that's a mouth full. Thanks to** TionneDawnstar** for that! And THANKS TO EVERYONE! I posted a new pic up on deviantart/homepage...considor a gift to you guys...enjoy! Tis from Come Together. Hopefully I'll be doing more of those. Till next time, my loves!


	30. Just A Little Push

_Just A Little Push_

_I hate people._

_I hate animals._

_I hate plants._

_I hate the world._

_I hate manic depressive wannabe vampires._

_I hate hyperactive ninjas._

_I hate gun-arm men._

_I hate smoke stacks and their soon to be wives._

_I hate overly intelligent animals._

_I hate eccentric geniuses who bring cake._

_I hate everyone._

_I hate everything._

_…well…that isn't entirely true._

_I don't hate Tifa, but she's too embarrassed to be in the same room with me right now. Not that I'm doing much better…but hey, how do you react to something like that? Like I said earlier. They just found out Tifa and I were dating, and now they're already planning our wedding. Are our friends that desperate to see us get married?_

_I hate them all._

_I hear the door creak open behind me, breaking me from my hateful thoughts. Wishful thinking has it as Tifa, but I know better than that._

_"Okay, dammit Shera! I'll take care of it!"_

_God…not him again._

_His boots are heavy thuds, and he pauses to put out a cigarette, grinding it into ashes. A heavy sigh, and I hear a rustling, then a soft 'chink'. Smoke invades my nostrils, and I know now he'll begin speaking._

_"Now, listen…back there-_

_"Go."_

_"I got a little carried away-_

_"Away."_

_"And…well…I mean, it came out too fast-_

_"Cid."_

_"Dammit Cloud! You listen for one 'effin minute! It's bad enough damn Shera got me out here…so if I'm gonna apologize, you better damn well listen to me!"_

_"Go away."_

_"Dammit." He swears softly._

_He steps up beside of me, and I keep my eyes fixed to a distant sign. I can't read it, but I'm going to act like it's mildly entertaining._

_"Now Cloud…" He starts._

_"Shut up Cid."_

_"Shit no! Cloud!"_

_I sigh, my arms folded across my chest._

_He isn't going to let it go._

_"You don't have to put up with us for much longer. Does that make you feel better?" He asks._

_"No."_

_"Liar."_

_So what if I am. You still aren't going to be gone fast enough._

_He sighs, "…How..."_

_A pause._

_"Dammit Shera." He mutters._

_A deep breath, and he starts again._

_"What……DAMMIT!"_

_"This is a lot harder than you thought it would be, isn't it?"_

_"Oh shut your effin pie hole Cloud."_

_"That isn't the way to apolog-_

_"I said shut it! I'm sitting here trying to be the big person, and you just keep making it effin harder!"_

_I set my mouth in a grim line._

_Just stare at the sign._

_"I'm…I'm going to make this up to you, Cloud."_

_Did I just snort?_

_"I'm serious! I have a proposition for you."_

_"Proposal would be better suiting!"_

_"YUFFIE!" Cid barks._

_She steps up to my other side._

_"You need to pay more attention to your surroundings; I could've killed you six times by now, old man."_

_Cid growls. _

_Pauses._

_Searches. _

_Narrows eyes._

_"Give me my cigs back, Yuffie." His voice is dangerously low._

_"No. They'll kill you one day."_

_"Not before I kill you, brat."_

_She sticks her tongue out, Cid makes a grab for it, and suddenly there rolling on the ground._

_"Gimme my damn cigarettes!"_

_"No!"_

_"Yuffie!"_

_"Get off fatso!"_

_"GAH! Cig-oof!"_

_"Take that, fool!"_

_"My…gasp…stomach."_

_"You better be glad I like Shera, or else it would've been something else. Though why the hell she'd want to reproduce with you, I have no idea." Yuffie states, standing._

_Cid growls again, pushing himself up. _

_"Why…you little…"_

_"Hey, where'd Cloud go?" Yuffie asks, turning around._

_"Huh? Cloud! Come back!"_

_They didn't notice me walking away. _

_Nor did I notice Yuffie flinging her self at my back until it was too late._

_She plows into my back, and I manage to let out a strangled cry. Down I go, Yuffie sitting firmly on my back._

_"Get off, Yuffie."_

_"No. Cid, join me."_

_"**What?**" I ask._

_There is no response; however, suddenly a lot more weight is positioned on my back._

_I gasp for breath. Cid isn't very light._

_"Give me my cigarettes."_

_"Fine, you big baby."_

_I hit my fist on the ground. Really, it's getting hard to breathe._

_"..Cid…" Gasp…I can't breathe! Get your fat ass off me!_

_"Now Cloud, you're going to have to sit here and listen to us."_

_Like I have a choice._

_"We have a …proposal for you." Cid begins._

_"It was my idea." Yuffie beams._

_Cid grumbles, "In order to make up for my little slip up earlier…well, how does this deal sound?"_

_How do you make up with someone with a deal? Aren't you supposed to do something for that person regardless? It's not a trade. That's the point of making it up! You humiliated me! So now, you should do something for me! Not humiliate me, and then make a deal with me…that isn't how it works!_

_However, I don't think I'm in much of a position to make this point right now._

_"If I buy Tifa's dress for the wedding, and let me tell you! It's a pretty penny…well…actually…I'll buy Tifa's dress for my wedding if you do this…"_

_What? "Why…gasp…dress?"_

_"Because, dumbass, she's a bride's maid." Yuffie states._

_"O…kay…If?" I gasp._

_"If you propose to her before my wedding." Cid states._

_What._

_The._

_F-_

_"Great idea, huh?" Yuffie asks._

_Cid's standing up; thank goodness…but…what?  
_

_I'm not going to get up, not yet. I don't think I'd be able to stand up. My legs would give out._

_"Propose…to Tifa?" I ask, my lungs still recovering from lack of air._

_"Yep…that's pretty much it." Cid states. "I mean, you don't have to do it…it's just quite a few thousand gil out of your pocket. Shera's got expensive taste."_

_Oh hell no._

_"Are you trying to con me into asking Tifa to be my wife?" I spit vehemently._

_"…erm…that's one way to put it." Cid states._

_"What the hell?!" I yell._

_Yuffie flinches on my back._

_"Can I not do it on my own time? What the hell?!"_

_"This is quite the outburst, Spike!" Cid exclaims. "I can't remember the last time you said that much at that level of noise!"_

_"Cid." I growl._

_"Oh don't be a sour sport Cloud. We know you'd do it eventually." Yuffie states._

_"I would?"_

_"Yes, you would…or I would whisk your eyeballs out."_

_…Wait…what?_

_"What kind of threat was that?"_

_"An original, that's what." She replies. "Anyways…what I'm trying to say is that we're just giving you a push."_

_"Yeah, and it's not like you have to do it today." Cid adds._

_"You've still got like…months…oober globs of time."_

_…oober globs? Should I even ask?_

_"I haven't even told her that I love her yet."_

_…oops._

_Cid's cigarette lands on the ground before my face. Yuffie is silent._

_Then…attack._

_"Ohmahgawd! You **do** love her! That's so precious!" She squeals._

_Arms…around neck…choking…dying…help…_

_"Yuf…fie…can't…bre-_

_She gives another violent squeeze._

_I'm going to die!_

_I can see the newspaper now:_

_Hero choked to death by over excited ninja performing the ancient ways of the ninja: the death squeeze. Friends say they thought it was a hug. Turns out, the conniving little ninja was actually an assassin…so conniving, **she **didn't even realize she was an assassin._

_"This is sooo adorable! Ehmahgawd! I can help you pick out a ring and everything!"_

_"Yuffie, you're killing him."_

_"OH! Heh…heh."_

_I can breathe! I take in a deep breath of air._

_I spring up. Yuffie falls off my back and onto the ground. I glare at her, and she looks up._

_"What?" She asks innocently._

_I say nothing. I turn my gaze to Cid._

_"…"_

_Still nothing. With that, I storm off._

_It's not that I don't love Tifa, and it's not that I haven't thought about it._

_I just **hate **it when that stupid ninja gets me to talk!_

_"Cloud! Cloud wait! Is this an agreement?" Cid shouts._

_I'm not answering that._

_"Okay! We'll…just give you some time…to think about it! Sounds good!" Yuffie shouts._

_It's when I'm nearing the bar that I hear the first call._

_"Ooh! It's the streak!"_

_"Hey baby!" Another voice. "Blue's my favorite color too! Why don't you climb into my window sometime with just your boxers?"_

_Loud women cackles._

_"Oh! It is! Personally, I preferred the other view."_

_"Which view?"_

_"The one without his shirt!" _

_More laughter._

_Just make it to the bar, and you'll be safe._

_"Man, I hope that woman knows what she's getting into."_

_"Yeah, if my husband went dangling from a window in his boxers, there'd be hell to pay."_

_"Though I wouldn't mind seeing it some more."_

_More laughter._

_I hate people._

_I hate women._

_I hate this town._

_"The blue streak!"_

_I hate blue boxers._

**A/N: **hey everyone! It's been a rough week; my grandfather's health is rapidly declining, and I've been working nonstop! BUT I PASSED CALCULUS! don't expect any updates for MDL/LIB ...heh...abbriviations...**It's chapter 30**! Can you believe we've gotten this far? For this chapter, I felt need to bring in a big subject...so Cid and Yuffie had to get together to plan...Yes, they are that pushy...yes they are that crazy...and yes Cloud does love Tifa. Celebrate! Everytime I read a review, I smile. It makes my day that you guys love this story as much as I do.** Sparx! **If you draw something, I would love to see it! In fact, if anyone draws anything, I'd love to see it. **okay...to answer a question.** The thing...in chapter...15? When Tifa 'hurt' herself...that was when Let it be was still included in this story line...so now...you can just consider it a fluke...or a sneak peek into the future of Let it be.OH! **Seph! **You are a halo fanatic as well? I haven't played live in a while, been busy with Gears of War...to anyone who has a 360...IT IS A MUST HAVE...BLOODY FREAKING AWESOME...buy it. It's just too short! Awesome, though. Well, there's my advertisement! **stormsight...**don't destroy your laptop...hehehe...**prozacfairy! Andalite! **welcome! And **ellumina,** I'm flattered, really. I want to thank everybody for the support...and don't worry, I realize these past ...like...seven chapters have been about this one time...but it's been good material! PREPARE FOR CHANGES! Later loves...ENJOY WHATEVER HOLIDAY YOU CELEBRATE! **_HAPPY HOLIDAYS! _**

**_Love horky_**


	31. Curses!

_Curses!_

_God, has this been one hell of a day. I mean, honestly, two of my good friends just tried to con me into asking Tifa to marry me._

_Not to mention the fact I found a sign on the front door about an hour ago that read 'See the one and only Blue Streak live at eleven o'clock Sunday morning!'. It also included a small, crude picture of what appears to be blue boxers._

_Don't worry, I've already burned them. The blue boxers I mean...not Cid and Yuffie._

_Anyways, it's been rather awkward, and I'm thankful that night has finally come. Now I can sleep, and all these crazy, no-good people will be out of my hair for a while._

_And no they weren't impaled while being in my hair…_

_Well…I guess they aren't completely no-good…I mean, they did help save the world and all._

_At least I've calmed down somewhat…_

_…somewhat…_

_Currently, I'm sitting outside. It's where I've spent most of my time…in the shadows…away from people…eyes…**women's **eyes…there might have been a few men in there as well…_

_…let's just not go there._

_Leaning back, I notice that the window is open, and I tip my head up slightly, peering up at the light that streams from it. _

_…I hear voices…_

_…hmmm…_

_"…don't sass me, Vincent!" Yuffie spits._

_I hear a snicker from what seems to be Reeve._

_"What? **What?**" She seems to have turned her attention to Reeve._

_"I'm…I'm…" he's full-blown laughing now. "I'm just trying to imagine Vincent…sassing…someone." _

_There's a deep rumble, a chuckle, from what seems to be Nanaki._

_He clears his throat, though, "But he's right, Yuffie. You had no right to do what you did."_

_"Since when is giving Spike some type of incentive wrong?" She spits._

_They're talking about me!_

_…dammit…apparently she's relayed her's and Cid's escapade from earlier._

_Vincent sighs, "Because Yuffie. Love is a delicate matter. You don't go around pushing two people into it. It's something they do in their own time."_

_"Listen to the man, he's right." Reeve states._

_Sounds like he may have found his way into the alcohol already._

_"How? Please, inform me how! It was I, yes **I**, who even brought around the two hooking up! If it hadn't been for me, Cloud probably still be sitting on his lazy ass brooding all day long on whether or not Tifa was in love with the hot carpenter guy from Kalm."_

_…What?_

_"A hot carpenter guy from Kalm?" Vincent asked, dubiously._

_"**Yes**. He's been here five times, as far as I know. And! I know for a fact that Cloud is extremely jealous of him…I also have it on good sources that he was well interested in Tifa for quite a while…may still be for all I know."_

_He's been here **five **times?!_

_"…wait…wait a second, hang on." Reeve's struggling, "How do you know all this?"_

_"I…uh…bu…I erm…"_

_"Basically that means she's gotten the guy drunk and conned him into telling her." Nanaki states._

_"Oh." Reeve replies._

_"I **did not** get him drunk. He was perfectly drunk when I met him, thank you very much. I just used that to my advantage."_

_Reeve snickers again, Nanaki joins him._

_"So what does this have to do with Cloud and Tifa?"_

_"Why do you think that guy was there the night Cloud had his 'revelation'?"_

_"What?" Reeve asked._

_Yuffie sighs, "When I basically flat out told him that Tifa was interested in him, and he was interested in her."_

_"Can't you just let things be done in its own time?" Vincent asked, he's peeved slightly._

_"**NO.** The fact of the matter is I'd probably be in my grave before those two got together if we left it up to them."_

_"She does have a point." Reeve states._

_"Still, one push was enough Yuffie." Vincent remarks. "You need to learn how to respect other people's matters."_

_"And grow up a bit…" Reeve mutters._

_"I resent that!" Yuffie yells._

_"What do you think of all this, Nanaki?" Reeve asks, ignoring Yuffie._

_"I think it's absolutely absurd."_

_"What, Cloud and Tifa?" Yuffie asked._

_"Humans in general."_

_Significant scoffing and protests inserted here._

_"I cannot help it if I do not understand the human psyche. It is as trivial and complex as it is simple and based on basic instincts. It's fickle, and unreliable, and completely and utterly confusing. Few people I have ever met of the human race have actually made sense in most matters. Unfortunately for your species, there is always at least one fault in their psyche."_

_"I'm one of those, right, Nanaki? With just one fault, right?" Yuffie asks, eager._

_There's a moment of brief silence._

_"No."_

_Reeve cracks up again._

_"Nanaki! Was that an insult?" She yells._

_Vincent sighs, "What he's saying is that he is of superior species than you, Yuffie. It's not necessairily an insult, just the blatant truth."_

_"Well…it's a very rude truth, if you ask me." Yuffie replies._

_"It's just with my species, you love someone or you don't. You do not play games with feelings, or ahem… 'beat around the bush' as some of you would put it. There is mere fact. A simple statement, that's all. No mixing of feelings. You either do or don't in all aspect."_

_"Oh **please.** You're just trying to act all high and might for us… 'lesser creatures'." Yuffie states._

_"I'll have you know- Nanaki begins._

_I've had enough of this._

_The door bangs loudly against the wall when I open it._

_"C-Cloud!" Yuffie yells, startled._

_Sure enough, there's a bottle of wine sitting before Reeve, he has been drinking._

_"What?" I ask coldly._

_"Heh, nothing!" She says, before grabbing Reeve's wine._

_A short battle ensues, but I don't stick around long enough to figure out who will win._

_I head up the steps, Yuffie and Reeve's struggles fading out. I hear voices again. Well, isn't this just a wonderful night for information?_

_"Cid! I can't believe you did that!"_

_"What's the problem, Shera? I mean, honestly…the kid's way to insecure to do anything for himself!"_

_Ouch. That was cold._

_"Cid!"_

_"What! I was just trying to help, dammit!"_

_"God, Cid, you just don't get it, do you?"_

_"No…I don't! I don't see the big deal! The guy's getting a free dress!"_

_"In exchange for a marriage proposal! **This isn't something you just throw about**." She hisses._

_"What do ya mean?"_

_"Marriage is a life contract between two people, Cidney Highwind…and I will **not** have you mess this up for Tifa and Cloud by rushing them into it."_

_**Cidney?**_

_"Shera…what are you planning to do?" He asks dangerously._

_"What am I planning to do? **This** is what I'm planning to do, Cid. I'm going to march out there right this instant and tell Cloud that it doesn't matter what he does, you're still paying for Tifa's dress!"_

_"What?! Are you crazy woman!"  
_

_"And! If you disagree with me, man…oh I promise your life will be hell…starting with picking out the most expensive dresses possible for every single person in the wedding party…and guess whose paying for them all?"_

_"You wouldn't dare…"_

_"Try me."_

_Damn…who would've thought Shera actually did tame Cid?_

_"Listen, here woman."_

_"Oh ho ho…going for the woman talk, eh?"_

_"I'll tell Tifa."_

_What? What does that have to do with anything?_

_Smack!  
_

_"Ah! Gawd! Dammit! 'Effin sons of a bitch! That is a freaking hard-copy of a book, Shera…and that was my head it just contacted with."_

_Must…contain…laughter._

_"Yes it was!"_

_"I'll do it woman!"_

_"Cid! If you tell her, she'll always be in doubt for the reason Cloud proposed to her! IF ever! You'd ruin it before it even began! I will kill you!"_

_"She wouldn't doubt it after our wedding."_

_"Cid!" Shera's voice is raising in octaves._

_"Now…just calm down Shera…please."_

_Whack! _

_"Gah!"  
_

_Ha! You deserve it!_

_But what if Tifa ever did find out about that little…proposal? Even if I didn't agree to it, how would she react? _

_…Best to just leave that unanswered._

_I continue down the hall, a solid whack every now and then. I reach the children's bedroom door, it's cracked open ever so slightly. It's dark inside and I can hear voices yet again!_

_I think Tifa's putting Denzel and Marlene to bed._

_"Do you actually think Yuffie would ever marry Mr. Valentine?" Marlene giggled._

_"Ewww…no way! I think he'd kill her before he'd propose to her!" Denzel responded._

_I hear Tifa's laughter, and she shushes them._

_"Now, we don't want to think Vincent would ever harm Yuffie, no matter how close to the truth it may seem."_

_"But…opposites attract!" Marlene protested._

_"Now where did you hear that?"_

_"A movie!"_

_"A movie?"  
_

_"Oh, was it one of those sappy ones?" Denzel whines._

_"It wasn't sappy…it was very romantic, thank you very much." Marlene states haughtily._

_I swallow…I feel another Yuffie forming._

_"That isn't always how it happens in real life, sweetie." Tifa states._

_"So! What about Daddy and Elmyra?"_

_I hear Tifa gasp, and stifle laughter, "Oh honey…don't mention that to your father. He's liable to have a conniption."_

_"What's that?"  
_

_"Just don't worry, honey. Now you two need to go to sleep."_

_"Just one more question, Tifa!" Denzel states._

_"Okay, one more…but this is the last one, right?"_

_"Right!" Marlene shouts._

_"What about you and Cloud?" Denzel asks plainly._

_"What about me and Cloud?" Her voice is soft, nervous almost._

_Oh…oh God…I should walk away. It isn't right for me to listen._

_But that isn't going to stop me._

_"Well…aren't you going to get married?" Marlene asks._

_"Hey, that's two questions!" Nervous laughter._

_"Just answer it, Tifa!" Denzel whines._

_"It's not just up to me, ya know." Her voice seems calmer._

_"So what if Cloud said yes?" Marlene asks._

_"So what if he did?" Tifa counters._

_I swallow, slowly leaning towards the door._

_"Tifa!" Marlene whines again._

_She sighs, "Just go to sleep."_

_"But you never answered!" She protests._

_"How bout this one instead?" Denzel asks._

_"Okay, what?"_

_"Do you love Cloud?"_

_…Silence…_

_I just realized I'm holding my breath…_

_Does she love me? And if so, will she really confess to a couple of kids?_

_I can't take the pressure!_

_"Of course I do. We all do."_

_"You know what we mean! Like…true, heart-stopping, one in a million, soul mate love?" Marlene asks dramatically._

_"You have got to lay off on the movies." Denzel interjects._

_"Hush! Answer Tifaaaaaaa…"_

_"Well…I…mean…I guess…it's just…well…"_

_Yes? **Yes?**_

_"Uh…huh?"_

_"Erm…alright…I'll tell you…but it's a secret, right?"_

_"Right!"_

_"I-_

_"Hey! Man! Whatcha doin?"_

_And any answer I could've heard was completely drowned out._

_I will slaughter Barret with my hair._

_Yep, that's right, I'm taking Cid's advice. My spikes will impale._

_I feel my teeth grind together, and I let out a hiss of air, Barret still standing behind me. I turn around quickly, and glare at him._

_"Whoa man. What cho' problem?"_

_"Good night you two." Tifa's coming out of the bedroom._

_"Oh, hey Tifa!" Barret states as she exits._

_"Hey…what are you two doing out here?"_

_"Oh I just-_

_"Nothing." I state walking away._

_"Cloud?" She asks softly. "You okay?"_

_"Yeah…I'm fine."_

_Curses!_

_CURSE IT TO HELL._

**A/N: **Bwhahaha! I leave you in suspense! Feel the evil waves! FEEL THEM! I'm in a relatively good mood, HAPPY NEW YEARS! Although I had to work...curses! Okay, lots to write...SO listen up! You guys, are just amazing...like seriously. **Seph! **You want to cut me in half with a chainsaw...I just can't _wait _to try it out on live, now...hah...I actually bought it as a christmas present to my best bud...and he completely boshed it by saying he'd bought it two minutes after I walked out of the store...and I promptly pulled it out of my bag...and then he had the nerve to tell me he was just kidding...Sooo...obviously I ran away from him in the mall, but twas all in good fun! And you shame me in Halo...I'm only like...a 19 or something. I made it to 24 once, though. **MakoRain:** Good God! That was quite the reviews! Hell, I'm impressed you stayed up allnight to read it, and quite flattered...You definately deserve some type of props...enjoy them...mad props...from the one and only Cloud-o. Fan of your stories too, hope you keep up the good work. **Tincent: **I feel your pain...I work at teh mall, and I was ready to go on a mass slaughter. People are complete idiots...especially when it rains...the get even more stupid than normal. **Just Mystical:** Hello! I am a big fan of yours, and was glad to see you update It started with a kiss...tis a cute story. So I'm quite flattered your enjoying my story, and the fact I was called cheerful just gave you browine points! Enjoy them! **Calistar Heir** Hello to you and your friend Haruki...everyone needs a sarcastic annoying person it make their day, hope you enjoy this chappie! **Sparx: **Draw draw! I must insist. I just got some prismacolors for christmas...drool...they ROCK. **Laura: **been there...it's not so much anything is bad, I just hate it when people read over my shoulder...feel your pain! **s2cloti** hello! Romance and humor belong togheter...hand in hand.

Thanks to everyone who thought of me grandpa...he's doing pretty good, all things considored...twas a wonderful Christmas, and I hope you all enjoyed your holidays as much as I did.

You guys want a gift? ...Okay, for all the great reviews...and since I'm lazy...every review next chapter gets a response! I would love to respond to all of you, since you're so kind and great, every chapter...and I would now, cept it's currently 3:15 AM...and I get to go shopping tomorrow FINALLY...so, I'm off to lala land!

g'night!

_Love you ALL! EACH AND EVERYONE!_


	32. Ye Have Little Faith

_Ye Have Little Faith_

_They're gone! Hallelujah! Celebrate!_

_Vincent sighs as he sinks back into the couch, disturbing my thoughts._

_Well, at least most of them are. _

_Vincent and Barret are still here, both preparing to leave._

_Currently, Vincent and I are sitting on the couch. It was a long night, especially if you take in the fact that it was a crappy night. I mean, the night before I spent it sleeping with Tifa, and this time I was crammed in my room with Barret, who was convinced the couch was going to give him a bad back. Or so he said._

_That was the lamest excuse ever._

_It didn't help that I haven't really felt like talking to Barret. I don't know where he is, but I know he hasn't left yet._

_Damn._

_Vincent's eyes slowly move to look at me, and I swallow, nervous under his gaze. I don't like it when people stare at me, especially with recent events._

_I feel like everyone's just trying to picture me in blue boxers._

_Wait...damn! Mental images! No!_

_I squeeze my eyes shut in pain as I imagine Vincent imagining me in blue boxers._

_Oh dear God, what have I done?!_

"_Cloud, you okay?" _

_I open my eyes; it's Marlene. She's looking at me with a puzzled expression on her face; Vincent is still watching me as well, his head propped up on his arm._

"_Yes." Is all I can manage at this point._

_She smiles, "You can have Pen-Pen if you want! He'll cheer you up!"_

_Pen-pen? _

_This seems vaguely familiar... A chill runs down my spine, and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. _

_Why do I have a feeling this does not bode well?_

_Marlene reaches behind her back and pulls out a rubber penguin. _

_No! Not that thing! _

_I recognize it. The penguin...penguin of doom as I like to refer to it as. Marlene bought it a while back, and man is that thing annoying. And to prove this, Marlene gives 'Pen-pen' a solid squeeze._

_Squeak!_

_And so it begins._

_Squeak! Squeak-squeak-squeak-squeaky-squeak!_

_Make it stop!_

_Sqqqquuuuueeeeaaaakkkkkk!_

"_No! She found Pen-Pen!" I hear Tifa shriek from somewhere upstairs._

_At least we will all suffer._

_Squeaky! Squeak!_

_It takes all my strength not to slap myself in this moment. I remember what had happened to our beloved Pen-Pen. Tifa hid him. She wouldn't let me destroy him because Marlene had bought it with her own money. But she'd be damned if she'd have that stupid penguin squeaking day in and day out. Those were her words exactly._

_I don't know where she hid it, but it apparently was enough to keep the stupid thing hidden for a few months. I honestly had thought Marlene had forgotten about._

"_See? He cheers me up right well!" Marlene squeezes the penguin again._

_I force a hesitant smile and try to block out the squeaks. I can practically feel the waves of doom radiating away from Vincent. It's like a prophecy of death for the little squeaking bastard._

_Marlene tilts her head, "Don't you like him Mr. Vincent?"_

_Vincent stares at the girl, "No."_

_Marlene grins bigger, "That's just because you don't know Pen-Pen!"_

_Marlene slams the penguin down onto the table beside of the couch, where it lets out a long, fulfilling, high-pitched squeak. I cringe as she squeezes the thing with all her might._

_I just want to crawl away and bury myself somewhere._

_Marlene lets go of the penguin, leaving it sitting on the table. Then 'it' happens in the blink of an eye._

_Apparently that was one too many squeaks for Vincent._

_The small dagger plunged through the head of the squeaky penguin, running it straight through to the table, pinning it there. The penguin gave out a pitiful, dying cry in its last moments of squeaky goodness. Marlene let out a frightened gasp, and any other little girl would've burst into tears. But God, she is not just any other girl. She was raised by Barret, and that in itself...it's an amazing feat she's made it this far with all of her limbs intact._

_Marlene's brow furrowed at the seeming death of her beloved penguin, then raised her eyes to look at Vincent._

"_You weren't loved enough as a child, were you?"_

_I think it took us both a moment to register what she just said...and when I did...I about died._

_Vincent's eyes narrowed as he regarded the girl._

_Marlene tipped her head back for a second in thought. "You aren't a happy person, are you, Mr. Valentine?"_

_Oh, this is priceless...classic. Oh how I wish everyone was here to witness this moment in time. I actually let a small scoff escape, and Vincent turns his deadly look on me. I clear my throat, and nervously shift to regain my composure._

_Vincent's attention returns to the child, "And **what**...exactly, would you like me to do about it?"_

"_Nothing." She merely states. "You just need a hug."_

_My eyes fling open at this statement, and I have to fight from just...rolling on the floor with laughter. Of course, my mood changes the moment I actually see Marlene moving up to hug Vincent, and I notice his hand grip tighter on the hilt of his dagger._

"_Now...now Marlene. Let's not bother Vincent anymore." I state, swallowing._

"_But I'm just trying to help!" _

"_But he's beyond help...even Vincent knows that much." Damn...did I actually say that out loud?_

_Vincent's cool eyes slide to me, "No...Cloud. Maybe she's right. Maybe all I need is a hug."_

_I'm trying to figure out if he's mocking me or Marlene here._

"_Wh-what?" I ask, eyes wide._

"_Goodie!" Marlene cried, before flinging herself onto Vincent's chest._

_Oh dear God._

_I understand...Vincent was just trying to...mess with my head, but there was no way in hell he was prepared for that. Even **I **wasn't prepared for that. We're both just sitting there in shock. Vincent's eyes...Vincent, people...went wide with shock. I've never seen him look so surprised before. Obviously the man has never been hugged by a sugar-high Marlene before._

_While Marlene was putting her heart and soul into this moment, Vincent was lying there, stiff and unsure how to react. He hesitantly patted her on the back once with his hand. _

_Marlene pulled up and resumed standing before us. Vincent still sat there stiff and almost waiting for the girl to pounce him again._

"_See? Don't you feel better?" She grinned big._

_Oh I wish I had a camera, or something to record this moment. Marlene is bringing out some human emotions in Vincent I think he had forgotten about. He really didn't know what he was getting himself into when he joined up with us all those years ago, did he?_

"_Yes...thank you." Vincent states, and Marlene prepares to pounce again._

_And of course at this opportune moment Barret just happens to walk into the room._

"_Oh shit! Damn! Marlene! Don't do it!" He yells as he watches his daughter fling herself onto Vincent...yet again._

_Barret is beside us in a second, and pulling Marlene off of Vincent._

"_Now what did I tell you about Valentine, Marlene?" Barret hisses into her ear._

"_Not to touch him." She replied._

_Barret returns his attention to us, Vincent watching him strangely._

"_Sorry bout that, Vince. Marlene gets a little excited sometimes." He states._

"_It's fine, Barret. Apparently I needed a hug, and she was happy to comply."_

_I can't explain the look in Barret's eyes, and that's what sent me into actually laughing. I'd managed to hold it in so far, but man, after that...there's just no way. Vincent gives me a cold look as I lean over onto the arm of the couch and laugh._

"_And it's nice to see that Cloud has finally learned to laugh again." There's an ulterior motive to Vincent's speak, and I know it. _

_Needless to say, I stop laughing._

"_Excuse me?" I ask, catching my breath._

"_Well, just after all the recent events, it's nice to see that you can laugh after all the laughing that's been done at you."_

_I swallow, that was quite the insult there ol' buddy, ol' pal._

"_It's nice to see that your spirit hasn't been broken." Vincent calm and cool and collected._

_Damn...I don't have anything to say to that._

"_To true, man, to true." Barret replied, Marlene nodding her head._

"_What...?Are you trying to tell me you have no faith in me?" I ask, dubiously._

_Vincent watches me for a moment, "For the most part...yes."_

_I'm at a loss. What the hell? I saved the world man!_

"_How can we have faith in a man who doesn't even have faith in himself?"_

_Oh...now that was cold...that was cold and low._

"_I'm sorry, what?" I state. "I have no faith in myself? What, do I have to prove it to you people?"_

"_If you wouldn't mind." Vincent inclines his head towards me._

_I study him for a moment, "Fine. I will."_

_I should really think about what I'm saying before I actually say it...it's a good thing to considor._

"_Fine. If you have faith in yourself, you'll have no problem telling Tifa that you love her."_

_My mouth dropped. I normally can keep that from happening...but damn! And I'm not even going to look at Barret right now._

_And how the hell did he know? The only people I told was Cid and that stupid ninja- ..._

_Son of a bitch._

**A/N: **They're all out to get him, I swear.

**lilmizgrunge: **I didn't even think about pitying Cid...heh, guess I wasn't taking him into account when Shera slapped him upside the head with a book.

**Janettelle:** Hello! With friends like those, who needs enemies? And Cloud, I think he finally deserves the chance to be normal. And I'm glad to see you're for the whole cloti thing...heh

**Sabith: **I updated as quick as possible, and I must say...that wasn't one of my fav chapters either, but I couldn't get the image of Vincent ragging on Yuffie out of me head.

**ellumina: **She sure is...she's a fun character to harass everyone with. And that line...probably my fav out of the last chappie.

**anonynous: **Yes! Nanaki is a superior species. People just can't get past the whole four-legged fur covered beastial creature.

**Rhyssa: **You caught me. That oneshot was just a distraction. hides head in shame but since reading your review, I can't get the image of Cloud headbutting Barret in an attempt to impale him out of my head. I don't think it would go in Cloud's favor, though.

**elebelly: **If he'd been a few seconds later, where would the fun be in that? And don't worry about reviewing all the time, I know you care, and that's enough.

**Sparx: **To torment Spike is the only way to go, I'm afraid. Copics? Goodness, I don't even want to image in the price on that bill. And you're welcome for teh humor, hopefully this chappie inspired you some more. I would love to see a picture of Vincent stabbing poor Pen-Pen.

**Rend: **hehe, DO you know the answer? Or is this all a big lie I'm fabricating? just to crush your hopes and dreams! Cue evil laughter No, but really...the kids are easy to get things across adults can't. They're very useful in a plot full of clueless adults.

**Toons: **More loyal? Tis fine. I don't expect a review from everyone, but I like to give back. I'd like to get paid for writing too...unfortuantely Squeenix denies me rights to publish...damn them...and my muse perfers peanut-butter crackers, just for future reference...that or cheesecake.

**Calistar: **It was roughly three in the morning when i posted this. Heh, thanks for the meaningful review. I love any type of review, really. And hello Haruki! Cidney...I just couldn't resist it.

**Zenbon: **Picturing a dangling Cloud is priceless, I must say. And Cidney is unisex I believe. I have a male friend whose name is lindsay...I think Cid can handle Cidney, then.

**Iskra: **Oh, wouldn't we all like to see Cloud in his boxers. I'm sorry about your friend, and I'm happy to cheer you up.

**Bianka: **Don't fight it! Embrace the story. Yes, I completely understand about writers-block. Tis a pain, and are you speaking of Always in my heart? I hope you overcome your writers block and update that. It's a wonderful story, and I've been looking for an update for a while, and I hope you can make it as angstful as you need it in order to post it. I have wit? Now that's surprising. Unfortuanetly now that I have tackled Calc I, I have moved on to II...pray for me...And I'll pray for your mother too. I wonder when we'll hit 400?

**Just mystical: **I felt that Shera's got quite the fire to her...and books impower her...makes perfect sense. I'm glad you enjoyed the chap, and I wonder if it's actually possible for Cloud's hair to pierce skin? Certainly looks like it.

**Silver chocobo: **UPDATED! And thanks for the spears of...love.

**Teefie: **Thank you so much! It's the only time I believe Cloud will ever listen to Cid.

**Tincent: **Man, now I'm going to have to write something about cloud taking his frustration out on his hair. Thanks for the inspiration, and the reviews. you're always so kind!

**SEPHY! **A shotty? Oh...If I had a sniper or torque bow, you wouldn't get close enough to do any damage. BURN! No seriously, you'd probably kill me like...ten times over before I finally killed you. I bought my friend a purse for her b-day...my friend Lindsay was like, do you intend on actually giving that to her, or are you just looking for an excuse to buy it for yourself? Ah! Yuffie-hater? Ah well, can't love 'em all, I suppose. And I'm glad you're enjoying Tifa. And for Halo? I'm surprised i remember the controls after playing GoW so much.

**Teef: **thanks!

**tri17: **But we all know whether she loves him or not! right? RIGHT?

**onewingedangel: **Thanks so much! Yes, humor and romance are a good combination.

Till next time loves!


	33. Pity The Lame Chocobo

_Pity the Lame Chocobo_

_"Cloud! Phone!" _

_I look up from my maps, and glance over my shoulder. Tifa's calling for me. I stand slowly and go to the office. She smiles as I enter and watches me closely._

_"What?" _

"Nothing," she states, her hand over the phone. "It's just Vincent again. This is like the sixth time he's called in the past two weeks...maybe Marlene was right. Maybe all he needed was a hug."

_I take the phone from her, "I doubt it."_

_She laughs and walks away as I lift the phone up to my ear._

_"No." I state._

_"Cloud, it's been two weeks."_

_"And? Listen, I told you I would prove to you that I have faith in myself...not just go and tell...well, not just go and do that." I state._

_Honestly, I think he's enjoying this._

_"Cloud...you disappoint me."_

_"Go hug a toddler you morbid clown." The words fall out of my mouth before I even think about it._

_Wait, wasn't that how I got into this mess?_

_"...I understand the morbid part. But clown, Cloud?"_

_"Four words, Vincent. Big. Pointy. Golden. Shoes." I'm not holding back._

_Honestly, how can you not be a clown with those shoes?_

_"...They were the only thing that matched the claw." Somehow his voice is deathly serious about this._

_Okay, I am **not** discussing fashion here with Vincent._

_"Goodbye, Vincent."_

_"My faith in you is at a level two."_

_"You have that much faith in me?"_

_"...Negative three."_

_Click!_

_Stupid morbid clown._

_Ugh…_

_Bleah…_

_Ech…_

_Uhhhhhhh…_

_Someone please…ugh…ah…help…ah…eh…_

_Ugh._

_I let out another pitiful moan. This is freaking ridiculous. I haven't been asleep at **all** tonight. _

_I glance at my clock. The red numbers are a cruel memento to how long I've been awake. It's six bloody o'clock…in the morning._

_Ugh._

_It feels like there's something stuck in my chest, like, right beneath my ribcage. It's been bothering me all night, and I ache. What's wrong with me?_

_I sigh, and drag myself from my bed. It's given me no rest tonight; I see no reason to remain in it any longer. I'm just going to go watch some TV. Maybe that'll put me to sleep._

_You know what the worst part about morning television is? It friggen sucks. Really. Nothing but news people who are way too cheery for this time in the morning. Honestly, who wants to be a news person? Their hours are so sporadic, and do they get some special insurance claim that states when ever their head gets blown off in a hurricane, the news station will compensate their family? Or are they just that excited to be on TV they don't think to ask these questions…really…I think it's common sense._

_Groan._

_This isn't helping any._

_Six fifteen… Tifa will probably be getting up soon. Maybe she'll know what's wrong with me._

_Sigh._

_Weather people make such a big deal about weather too, you know? I mean, look at any time there's snow. Last winter I remember reading a headline that said 'Winter slaps Edge'. Okay, that was freaking lie. We got, what, a dusting of snow, okay? _

_Six twenty…_

_Oh! And not to mention the fact that when there's a miniscule amount of snow and/or ice on the road, people suddenly don't know how to drive. I've almost gotten killed at least twelve times because people overreact or under react. _

_Six twenty-five._

_I wonder if their coffee cups are really filled with coffee. It's got to be some form of liquid drugs or something to get these people up this early and smiling that much. It's not like the sane people are up to watch this, anyway._

_Six thirty._

_Time stops when you can't sleep, I swear._

_Sigh._

_Oh…oh…you've got to be freaking kidding me._

_Bathroom…Run…NOW!_

_My elbow smacks the doorknob as I push it open violently. For some reason, doors have become my mortal enemy. They've caused me a lot of pain as of the late, ever notice that?_

_But back to the present._

_I don't think you want the graphic details of what just happened here._

_Let's just say I just got a close up of my Wutai Chicken Lo Mien that I ate last night. I **knew **we shouldn't have ordered from Wutai Two._

_I'm freaking cursed. Son of a –_

_Hold that thought._

_Ugh._

_Man, I hate throwing up. It's the worse thing in the world, seriously. I can't remember the last time I threw up, and honestly, I don't care to. Well, at least we know what pain in the ribcage area means now._

_Hang on. Let me try to empty my stomach…again._

_My head clumps down unceremoniously onto the seat of the toilet. I **hate** throwing up…but I have no energy to move my head. I barely have enough to flush the contents of my stomach down the toilet._

_UGH._

"_Cloud?"_

_I wearily turn my eyeballs; it's Tifa._

"_Ugh."_

"_Cloud, what's wrong?" she asks, kneeling down to my level._

_I don't reply, merely turn my head back to the toilet and let my stomach play mean, cruel games on me._

"_Oh! Oh Cloud…" she places a hand on my back as I finish._

_She flushes the toilet, and then raises my head with her hands. She presses her hand to my head, it's nice and cool. I think I'm a little delirious._

_Hang on…those aren't her pajamas…_

_Wait a second! I've been looking for that shirt!_

_Oh great…not again._

"_Eck…" Tifa mumbles as I retch into the toilet again. "Oh Cloud, what are we going to do with you?"  
_

_I hear her leave, and I would protest, but I'm in no position to speak…let alone move. I'm afraid if I open my mouth, my stomach will betray me yet again._

_Then there's a blanket on my bare shoulders, and she tucks it around my back. I glance up at her, and she smiles sadly as she settles herself down beside of me._

"_We're going to be here for a while, aren't we?" She asks._

_I blink in response._

_She rubs my back for a while, and it's not so much I feel the immediate danger of throwing up again, it's merely the fact I'm afraid if I move, I'll set it off._

"'_Sum wata?" God that sounded pathetic._

_She frowns slightly, "Just a little bit, okay?"_

"_Mmph."_

_She gets me some from the tap, and I drink it gratefully. I really want to brush my teeth, though. _

_I freaking hate throwing up!_

_It's eight thirty when I throw up again._

_But after that, Tifa slowly helps me to my feet. She doesn't want me to sit on the floor anymore, and she thinks now that my stomach might be empty, I may be able to sleep. She drags me to her room, since it's closer, and pulls me onto the bed. I flop onto the bed, the blanket she brought me earlier still clinging to my shoulders._

"_Come here, sick one." she states, sitting up against her head board._

_I roll over and rest my head on her stomach, which is exactly what she had planned…or at least, that's what I had planned._

_The slow, gentle rise and fall of her stomach doesn't put me to sleep, but it does lull me into a peaceful state of mind. She runs her fingers through my hair, and hums softly, a few words escaping her lips every now and then. I don't recognize the tune, but it's soothing._

_My eyes open. Ten thirty. Must've fallen asleep. My eyes rise, to where Tifa's still sitting. She's still awake, and I don't think she's been asleep at all._

_I give a small smile, and she smiles in return._

_Oh bloody hell._

_I roll out of bed quickly, catching Tifa by surprise, and stumble out the door._

_I start throwing up again…and then dry heave._

_Dry heaving freaking sucks!_

_Tifa stands behind me again, and I finish off, breathing heavily. Who knew throwing up could take me down? Man, whatever the hell this is, I hope it doesn't last long. I'm miserable here!_

_Twelve thirty._

_Tifa's got me propped up on the couch, and I've nodded off a couple times, but I'm apprehensive. I've been throwing up every two hours, and I'm waiting for it to happen now._

_Tifa's warned Marlene and Denzel, and they've both asked if they can get anything for me. I just sort of look at them and grunt. Then they ran away._

_Two thirty._

_Tifa managed to get me to eat a few crackers and then drink a couple sips of juice._

_I fell asleep once, and when I woke up, Marlene's teddy bear Chester was tucked into the crook of my arm. I've felt no need to move him, so he remains a victim to a headlock in my sickly moments._

_Oh the pain! I don't feel the impending doom of puking again, so at least that much has been fixed. But I ache…like, down to the core. My bones hurt. I should drink some milk, but I hate milk. They say milk is good for your bones. Maybe if I drink some milk, then maybe I'll feel better. _

'_It doesn't work that fast dumbass.'_

_What was that?!_

_Chester? Are you speaking to me?_

_Silence._

_I look around the room, paranoid. Great, now I'm sick, achey, and delusional! What a day this has turned out to be!_

_Four fifteen._

_Ugh._

_I'm currently face down on my bed, as if I'm embracing it, Chester is trapped beneath my arm. Sleep still eludes me, though I'm trying to figure out how that is possible. I haven't slept since……well…it's been a really long time…I can't do math right now! My bones hurt!_

_At least I got to brush my teeth._

_Tifa's sitting on the bed beside of me, she sighs. She's running her hand through my hair again, and I close my eyes. It's a good thing Marlene and Denzel can take care of themselves for the most part, because this day would suck even more if Tifa weren't here._

_I just wish someone would put me out of my misery._

_You know chocobos? They shoot them, you know, when they break a leg. It's cheaper, and they aren't always guaranteed a full recovery if you give them medical treatment. So, they say it's out of mercy to just shoot the damned thing._

_That's what I am…a lame chocobo._

_Someone please shoot this lame chocobo._

'_Damn, he really must be sick to be referring to himself as a chocobo. Anytime **I** ever called him that, he threw a shoe at my face.'_

_Someone take pity on me and shoot me._

'_We can't kill you! How bout this…I'll shoot you in the foot…with a bow and arrow…don't know how that'll help…but it's some type of pity, right?'_

_If you won't shoot me, will someone please shoot the mocking voice that keeps talking?!_

_**Please!** _

'_Don't worry, Cloud…I'll shoot him for you.'_

'_Hey! I'm not the lame chocobo here! He is!'_

"_Cloud, you feeling any better?" Tifa asks from somewhere above._

_I crack an eye open._

"_Mmmph." That's all the response I can muster._

_She smiles at me, "Whatever you say, Cloud."_

_...she can't understand me...hmmm...this could possibly work to my advantage...granted, she might not have a clue what I say, or understand it...but that doesn't mean I **didn't **say it. Yeah, Vincent will have to accept that!_

_"Eff..." _

_She raises her head. _

_She laughs, "Alright Cloud. Sure thing."_

_Hmm...she doesn't even realize I just said her name._

'_It's time to go to sleep, Cloud.'_

_The voices are making sense now…_

_There's sheer silence, then the sound of a drop of water falling._

"_Sleep well." Tifa states, kissing me on my lips._

_"Eff..." I mumble wearily, my eyes closing, "Mi muv moo."_

_And it all turns blissfully dark._

**A/N: **Poor Cloud! Random, sort of, I know...but I couldn't get the thought of Cloud referring to himself as a lame chocobo. And there's a little bit of Zack and Aerith for ya! Yes, those were the voices, and yes Cloud was that sick that he didn't recognize them. Seems that Aerith finally took pity on his poor soul and gave him relief! Bout time woman! And you guys can just guess what 'Mi muv moo' means. I think it's cute. SO There's a story to this...I WAS Getting ready to post a piccy up on DA for youse guys...but of course, they go into read-only freaking MODE! SO I had to delay this chappie, because **Tis a GIFT FOR ALL OF YOU** for being so kind, and even READING my story...like really, I never thought Diaries would get this far...but, it has...and so...I bet you all can figure out what this pic is from! LIke the tittle doesn't give it away...der. So! Just click on me homepage, and it should be up there. I read all of your reviews, but I have no strength to reply. I'm exhausted. BUT I still love you, and I hope you enjoy your piccy! And it's not just for the reviewers/favers/alert...ers...It's for everyone whose even gave this story a chance, and that in itself is enough to make me happy. Later loves!


	34. When Love Began

**A/N:** Warning...Cloud contemplates!!!!

_When Love Began_

"_...oud...Cloud!"_

_I start, flinching, someone poking me in my back._

"_Cloud! Hey, Cloud...wake up!" _

_I groan as I roll over, blankets tangled around my feet and squint my eyes open slowly._

"_Cl-oud..Geez, take forever to wake up, why don't ya?"_

_I identify a small figure beside of my bed, and study it. "Marlene?"_

"_Hello Cloud! Finally! How ya feeling?"_

_I'm confused, "Alright...actually, I feel pretty good..."_

"_Well you **should** after as long as you've been asleep, mister."_

"_What?"_

"_You've been asleep for...like...a day and a half."_

_I blink. "Huh?"_

"_You heard me, Cloud. Tifa said you got up twice to use the bathroom, but she swears she didn't even see your eyes open. All I know is that she kept muttering 'He better not miss'...though I have no clue what she was talking about."_

_I better not...oh...OH..._

"_That's okay Marlene..." I state, "Is there something you needed?"_

"_Here!" She holds out the phone._

_She's had that the entire time?_

"_Um..."_

"_It's daddy! He wants to talk to ya!"_

_Dammit, can't I get some peace and quiet around here?_

_I reluctantly take the phone, "Thanks. Hello?"_

"_Spike!" _

_My ear! Man, I know I'm better but honestly...Ow._

"_Hello Barret."_

"_Listen, Vince is pissed at you, and well...I guess we all know why."_

"_So he's not calling?"_

"_Hey, I heard about the whole morbid clown thing. I'd be pissed too."_

"_So what can I call you to keep you from calling?"_

"_Shut up you mother-_

"_Ok, I get your point. What do you want?"_

"_Do you even have to ask, Cloud, really?"_

_Oh you've got to be kidding me!_

"–_..." Wait...wait a second... "Yes."_

_There's a moment of silence, and I can hear the steady breathing of Barret as he slowly processes this information._

_We might be sitting here for a while, folks._

"_Wahhhoooo! Hell ya bitch! I knew you'd finally get around to it! Woo! I gotta talk to her...lemme talk to her, damn, lemme talk to her!"_

_Oh ... crap..._

"_Um...yeah...about that." I state slowly._

_Barret's voice immediately dies, "What, she don't love you back?"_

"_No, it's not that..."_

"_Spike...did you actually tell her?"_

"_...Yes."_

"_...did she understand the significance of your words?" Holy...that came from Barret? How'd he figure it out so fast._

"_Um..."_

_There's a heavy sigh, "Spike! Damn, man! Here you had me all pumped...you little weasel, I should head over there and tell her myself! See how ya like it then, you like spikey punk!"_

"_Barret, calm down."_

"_Marlene told me you wus sick, but I didn't realize you were **that** sick."_

_Now that was uncalled for. "Barret, it's just..."_

_Barret sighed, "I hear ya man...I hear ya...and don't you worry about that damn reclusive vampire...I'll get him off your back..."_

"_I don't see why he's so interested, really."_

"_I guess he don want you to make the same mistake he did...ya know? Lose her and what not. He may act like he don't got no heart, but let's face it...beneath those red eyes and that deadly looking claw-_

"_And shoes."_

"_-he's got a big ol' soft heart." Barret lets out a loud laugh, "You know he ain't nothin but a big ol' softie, ya know?"_

"_Actually...I really don't get that impression, Barret...but I'll keep it mind, thanks."_

"_Heh heh heh...no problem, man...no problem...Now, lemme speak to my little baby. I gotta say bye to my little-_

_The phone is already being handed back to Marlene. I really don't feel like listening to Barret gush about his daughter. Marlene smiles as she takes the phone back, and gives a long winded speech about how he's 'the best daddy in the world, and oh how she loves him and she can't wait till he comes back, and to not worry, she'd make sure Cloud told Tifa he loved her.'_

_...wait..._

_...oh...hell..._

_Dammit! Every single time! Why can't these people just give it a rest already?! And now Marlene knows?! What...what the...oh...Dam-_

"_Whoa! Wahh!" There's a boyish yell from the steps._

_Crash! Bam! Thwack!_

"_Denzel!" Tifa screeches._

_Denzel?!_

_I spring up from my bed, and fall flat on my face, the sheets still tied up around my legs. But I'm up in a second, and run out of the bedroom , Marlene close behind, clutching the phone in her hands._

"_Denzel! Denzel!" Tifa's yelling._

_Somehow I make it all the way down the steps, sheets and all, and run into the bar. Utter chaos. _

_There's a bar stool laying on the ground beside of the fireplace, a few picture frames scattered across the floor as well, some broken glass. Denzel's lying on the ground beside of it, and Tifa's kneeling on the ground beside of him._

"_It...hurts..." Denzel whimpers, as Tifa presses a hand to his forehead._

"_What does, sweetie?"_

_I move quickly, kneeling down beside of Tifa. She spares me a glance, but turns her attention back to Denzel._

_Denzel bites his lip, fighting back tears, "My...a-arm..."_

_Tifa frowns, reaching out._

"_Don't touch it!" Denzel shouts. _

"_I'm not going to touch it, Denzel, but I need to look at it." Tifa keeps her voice calm._

"_No! Don't!"_

"_Denzel, calm down. We can't do anything if we don't know what's wrong." I tell him._

_Denzel sniffs a couple time, and fidgets, questioning look on his face before nodding his head once. _

"_Okay, but don't **touch** it."_

"_I won't." Tifa leans forward, looking down at the arm in question._

_I follow suite. We both reach out, Tifa's fingers lightly brushing Denzel's arm, but he doesn't yell to stop. She's got a grim look on her face, and so do I._

"_Broken." she mutters under breath._

"_What is?!" Denzel cries, eyes frantic._

"_Calm down, honey...we'll get you fixed up soon."_

_Three hours later, a trip to the emergency, and one awkward, itchy cast, we returned home. Denzel has been sulking ever since, eyes piercing the back of my head...I can feel them, I swear...and I think he's trying to drill a hole to my brain so he can hurt me._

_Although I'm not sure why._

_Tifa puts the kids to bed early._

"_This isn't fair." I can hear Denzel's muffled voice through the door._

"_I know, sweetie...but your actions have consequences." Tifa's voice is a soft contrast._

"_How was **I **suppose to know that was the stool with the lose leg?"_

"_What were you doing climbing up there, anyways? You broke some glass young man, and don't think you're getting off the hook just because you broke your arm."_

_In my mind I see Denzel scowl before replying, "So? It was a good purpose. I saw something."_

"_...You saw something? What?" Tifa asks._

"'_S not important." Denzel mutters, and I hear him shift._

_I turn, going back downstairs, and move towards the fireplace. Tifa's cleaned up the broken glass, and laid the damaged picture frames on the mantle. I pick one up. It's of Barret and Marlene, the glass splintered across Barret's chest._

_I sigh. What could he have possibly seen up here to interest him? A bug? A mouse? I don't know. I shake my head, replacing the frame back onto the mantle. My eyes drift across the other frames. There's one on the far corner near the wall. It doesn't seem to have a back to it, and is rested up against the bricks of the chimney. I feel something stir in my chest._

_Moving the frame out of the way, I spot a small, black velvet box._

_Oh...fuck._

_How could I have forgotten about that? _

_I pick up the box gently, holding it between two fingers. I remember this. I bought it...hell, I bought it before Meteor. Before Sephiroth. I bought it back after she found me in Midgar, all those years ago._

_I turn the box in my hands, contemplating it._

_How could I have forgotten this? It didn't leave my body for...months. I mean, I had it with me the entire time, always carrying it in a pocket...waiting for the right time, if there was such a thing. How could I have forgotten?_

_Because Sephiroth came, and along with him, came the fate of the planet. And as much as I hate to admit it, it was a more pressing issue than mine and Tifa's relationship. Still, even after Meteor, and Aerith dying...I kept it on me until..._

_Until I got Geostigma. That's right. When I got Geostigma, I felt like...I...I knew I was going to die, so...there was no right time. I left it here. I didn't hide it in my room, because knowing Marlene and Denzel, and the tricks Yuffie's taught them, they'd probably find it. So, I hid it in broad daylight. Maybe...maybe I was hoping that after I died she would've found it...maybe that's why it was in broad daylight...for sheer hope that she would find it, and come after me. _

_Even when I was resigned to death, I was still tethered here...to her...I couldn't let go of that hope, even if I didn't realize it at the time._

_Even still, how hasn't she found this?_

_Or maybe she has...and just didn't want to believe it._

_Hell if I know._

_But I think I would, if she had found it._

_Or would I? _

_Or have the kids found it before? But they would've said something, wouldn't they? And that would explain why Denzel was so intent on seeing what it was that was up here...but maybe he didn't find it. Maybe Marlene did. But she's blatantly obvious about these sort of things._

_I don't know, I really don't._

_I scratch the back of my head, pondering, before flipping the lid open._

_Silver compliments her, I think, better than gold...and I any time I saw pearls, I always thought of her...so that's what it was, silver and pearl..It isn't much, I mean, it was post SOLDIER days...and I was...muscle for hire...so, 's not like I had the most money in the world. However, there's still a tiny engraving on the inside of the ring; a symbol, a circle with intricate lines wrapping it...and MJ in the center._

_Midgar Jewelers. They'd been destroyed in Meteor._

_Hell, I had an artifact on my hands._

_I was what...twenty when I bought this? I scratch my head again. I can't believe I bought it...I had just been found by her, and already, I was thinking of that...maybe...I don't know. I don't...know if that was the right time, to even consider something that serious. We were in the midst of a revolution... How long had it been, six months after she found me? Yeah, that sounds about right. Six months after I met her again, after she brought me back into the real world...That was when I bought it. God, and I had a mouth on me then, I was a freaking cocky bastard._

_I blame Zack._

_Still, she put up with me. And I think...I think that then, I knew there probably wouldn't be anyone else who would put up with me._

_That's when it started, that's when I truly fell in love with Tifa Lockhart. _

_I slipped the ring back into the box, closing it. There's a squeak on the steps, and I slip the box quickly into a pocket. _

"_What are you doing, Cloud?"_

_I turn to see Tifa, standing at the landing. "Nothing...just...thinking."_

_She gives a small smile before walking over towards me._

"_About what?"_

"_..." I can't help it...I trust Tifa the most, but...I'm still not good with talking, with words, at least with my thoughts._

_Especially with those relating to Meteor and the events around it._

"_The past, Cloud?"_

"_And the future." That's right, the future too._

_She gives a small smile, "Well, Denzel's finally asleep...after a long-winded complaint speech, he finally tired himself out and fell asleep. Put Marlene to sleep too...almost did me in, as well." _

_I give a small smirk, my hand resting on the box in my pocket._

_What would they say, Cid and Yuffie, Barret and Vincent, Nanaki and Shera...what would they say if they heard that I'd been planning to marry Tifa for four or five years now. How would they react? Especially when they were the ones pouncing on me to propose to her._

_That would shut them up._

"_Cloud, you okay?"_

_I blink, startled out of my thoughts, "Yeah...of course."_

_She turns her head slightly, narrowing her eyes, "You sure?"_

_I sigh slightly, "Yes, Tifa...I'm sure."_

"_It's a good thing you're such a terrible liar," she states, walking away, "Cause I can see straight through that."_

_My eyes widened, "I am not a terrible liar."_

"_So you admit you were lying?" She asks, nonchalantly._

"_Tifa."_

"_You **were** lying! I knew it...what's wrong?" She asks, filling the sink up with water._

"_I am not lying."_

"_Well, there's something on your mind."_

"_There's always something on my mind, Teef."_

"_Oh really, what?" She asks, scrubbing at a glass._

_My fingers grace the small box once again._

"_You." I whisper, and she doesn't hear me._

**A/N: **It's been a while since Cloud's had a serious thinking moment. his brain finally recovered, and I felt the need to give him another blow. It's a stretch, I know...Cloud buying a ring before the events of even the game. But I couldn't help myself. I got the idea in my head, and it wouldn't let go...so, it won. You guys better be glad I wrote half of this chapter, like a week ago...or else you guys would have to wait longer. Don't expect many updates in the future...I mean, just as of the late. I'll be writing as much as I can, but I can't concentrate right now, so you guys are just going to have to hold on and bare with me. NOW! on a more cheerful note...**annomynous: **bwhaha, you're so right...Aerith shooting Zack with a bow and arrow...I just pictured that and about died. **animegirlie** Aw! I'm sorry, guess I wasn't thinking of that! **Calistar:** Haruki, what are you not telling me? And just breathe, Calistar...breathe. **Sephy! **somehow, you waiting in the shadows with your big ass sword disturbs me...I keep glancing over my shoulder, course, as long as you don't have a chainsaw, I think I'll be okay. **VinVal! **Thanks so much for the reviews, and those on my oneshots. You're always so kind, and thank you! And I'll let you know I have started to read your story To much Hope. I've been avoiding it (Trying not to spoil DOC) but, I'm no where near DoC, nor my playstation, so, I was like screw it...I'm reading it. And it is GREAT...I'll review once I catch up. **Bianka-chan** You updated! Good for you. **Rhyssa! **Dude, food poisoning does suck, how do you think this chapter was bred? Heh, and I have no problem if I take over your favorite story list...heh, one day I will rule the world!

OH! **and no! **Pen-Pen was not an Evangelion reference. I'm just that good...I've never even seen Evangelion O.o

Till next time, loves!


	35. Now Taking Pillow Applications

_Now Taking Pillow Applications_

_I knew this would be rough, with Denzel in his cast and everything, but I didn't realize how rough. He's so bored. Sure, he can do some things, but not everything he wants to do. Most of the time he sits on the couch and watches TV with this bored look on his face. At least he's sleeping now._

_I sigh, sitting at the end of the bar, my back resting against the wall. It's busy tonight, people in and out, laughing and loud. It's busier than your normal Thursday night, but tomorrow is a holiday, as much as the anniversary of Meteor wants to be considered a holiday. Even though it all stopped, even though everything wasn't destroyed, a lot of lives were still ended on that day; and even more lives were lost before Meteor was even brought into the picture. _

_Everything that surrounds Meteor was surrounded by Sephiroth, and Jenova._

_Zack...and Aerith...the people of Sector Seven, hell, the people of Midgar in general. All those people, Nibelheim, Corel; and...it still didn't stop, not until the entire world was threatened. Not until it became a big enough of a deal for everyone to care, when all of their lives were at risk._

_They're celebrating being alive, but we're mourning those we lost. And I think we're all still asking for forgiveness, for all those people that we caused the death of. It's one thing to have Aerith forgive me, but the people I can't ask forgiveness of; the people of the slums; and Wedge, Biggs, and Jessie._

_It's been a while since I've thought of them, but I guess with this anniversary brings about the thoughts._

_I sigh, slowly sipping the glass of whisky Tifa's laid out for me. I pinch the bridge of my nose hard, trying to shake these thoughts away, trying to get this off of my shoulders._

_Alcohol won't help it, but it won't hurt either, at this point...and it's not like I plan on drinking much, anyways. I sigh again into my glass, glancing over at Tifa._

_She's really pressed right now, and I keep bugging her to hire someone else, but she won't. I don't see why she won't, since it's obvious she could do with the help._

_I guess she's as stubborn as I am._

_Twisting in my seat, I bang my head up against the wall. _

_She'd scold me, because I'm brooding, but I can't help the fact I'm in a sour mood. I take another sip when I realize I was scowling._

_I look up again, Tifa's turned away from the counter, washing at some dishes while she's got the spare time. She's been in a rather testy mood lately, too...and I'm figuring it's for the same reasons as me._

_I go to take another sip of my drink, but pause as the glass reaches my lips._

_What the hell does that guy think he's doing?_

_He's stretching over the counter, his hands brushing against the drawer to the cash register._

_What does he expect to accomplish, anyways? The doors shut-_

_Oh...it's not._

_The man leans a little farther, a little more desperate now that the money's actually in close quarters with his hand._

_Oh that little thieving rat! Only Yuffie can do that and get away with it!_

_...Or at least **thinks** she's going to get away with it._

_Still, I'm going to wait for that man to touch the money before I attack. Wait, that's right, no one's looking; don't worry you're okay...you got it, you got it._

_BAM! CHING! _

_I nearly inhale my drink when I snort._

_The look on the man's face is priceless as his eyes go wide, and his face turns red, and he freezes; pain is written all over his face._

_Neither one of us noticed Tifa, who was still facing away from the bar, raising her foot up to kick the drawer shut. She kicked it so hard the bell on the register chimed. _

_And it isn't closed yet, because the man's still got his hand there._

_Move it, man...she's...move it!_

_Bam! CHING! Bam! CHING! Bam! Ching! BAM! CHING!_

_There might've been a crunch in there, as well._

_The last bell gives a long ring, and I watch as with each hit, the man slowly lowers his head, and bites his other fist to keep from screaming. _

_Oh this is priceless, and I'm still trying to figure out if Tifa knows what she's doing or if she's just that lucky._

_The man slowly removes his hand, as Tifa's foot comes up again and gives the drawer one last kick before it finally clangs shut with one last ring. She dries off a glass as she turns, muttering._

"_Damn drawer got jammed **again**." _

_I barely keep from snorting. _

_The man turns, walking away from the bar._

"_Hey," Tifa barks, "Aren't you going to pay for your drink?"_

_The man pauses, and turns slowly pulling money out of his pocket with his good hand, and placing it on the counter._

"_Keep the change..." he whispers hoarsely, sweating and panting, before heading away._

_Tifa frowns, brow furrowed before shrugging and going back to serving._

_It's late when the bar finally empties, staying open an hour later than normal. I take responsibilities with the kids; supper, bath, entertainment, and then putting them to bed. I'm tired when they finally fall asleep. Neither of them could go to sleep, from the noise downstairs. They're all hyped up over the people, and I kinda wonder if the realize what the big fuss is about. All they know is that they don't have to go to school tomorrow, and that suits them fine._

_And also is included in the argument to let them stay up later._

_Which they do._

_Sighing, I help Tifa clean up around the bar. We work in silence, me working in front of the bar, her working behind it. _

_I finish what she wants me to, and I ask if she wants me to do anything else, and she shoos me away...tells me to go to bed._

_Which I don't._

_I stretch out on the couch, yawning again. It'll be a long day tomorrow. Everyone else has got the day off, but I don't. After all, with the anniversary, people will want things delivered to graves and memorials, or to family members in general._

_I should really go to bed, but I'm not ready to sleep yet. _

_There's a whole heaviness weighing down on me and Tifa, I can feel it, and I can tell she can to. So I don't want to leave her alone._

_I finger the velvet box in my pocket, mind wandering, and I yawn again, closing my eyes._

_Don't sleep, don't sleep, I tell myself, and keep replaying the image of Tifa slamming that thief's hand in the drawer over and over._

_It'll keep me entertained for awhile, and maybe I'll let her know what she did._

_I don't even hear her walk in, just feel something press down on my stomach. I crack an eye, looking down where her head is pillowed on the top of my stomach. Her chin is pressing into my belly button, and her eyes are hidden by the curtain of hair that falls from her head._

_I start to reach up, to lace my fingers in her hair, but pause. There's...something on my shirt..._

_Oh, oh no...Tifa..._

"_Tifa," it barely even escapes my lips._

_She doesn't respond, just bows her head farther down, shoving her nose into my gut._

"_Tifa," I repeat, and swallow._

_It's hard on us all, remembering. I...there for a while, Geostigma, I just thought of my own suffering, my own guilt...and not of my friends; my family._

_It's harder though, isn't it? To take on other people's suffering and their guilt._

"_Tifa," she still won't look up._

_I don't get why she's so scared to show me her tears, and there's no denying that she's crying. Silently, maybe, and softly, but tears are tears._

_And she shouldn't have to cry, not when I'm here._

_And she's not going to try and say she fell asleep and drooled on my shirt, because I wouldn't put it past her._

_So I sit up, her head sliding up, forehead pressed to the hollow of my throat. I feel heat rise on my neck, fine hairs standing, but there are other things that are more important than that._

"_Why won't you show me?" the words slip from my mouth._

_It's almost insulting that she won't cry in front of me, honestly._

_She lifts her head quickly, eyes dry, but tell tale signs of red on her nose, eyes red as well._

"_Show you what?" she asks innocently._

_I press my lips together to stop me from frowning._

"_Tifa,"_

"_I need to finish cleaning up."_

"_You aren't done?" I ask, surprised._

_She bites her bottom lip, "No."_

_Liar._

_She goes to stand, pushing her hair back, but I reach out and grab her wrist, pulling her back down._

"_Cloud..." she won't meet my eyes._

_She knows I knows she's lying._

"_Tifa...you said not to carry my burdens...carry it by myself...so why do you have to carry yours by yourself?"_

_Her head tilts slightly at my words, but she still doesn't look up._

_The box digs into my hip, a reminder of what I want...the commitment I've been looking at for so long._

_For something like that, we have to carry each other, don't we? She can't be the only one to be weighed down, right? She said it herself, that we could help each other. She always tries to help me..._

_But why won't she let me help her?_

_Then we're falling back as she flings her arms around my neck, knocking me off balance. My head bangs against the armrest of the couch and I wince, but I lie still as she settles down on top of me._

"_I'm sorry," she whispers, her breath tattooing my neck._

"_Don't be," heat flushes up my face again, and I have to close my eyes._

_My fingers slip beneath her shirt, brushing them lightly against her spine._

_I'm taking up the job of human pillow tonight...or mattress, which ever is more suiting. I don't mind, really, pillowing her head, brushing her hair from her face. She takes care of me, so I want to pay her back, take care of her for once._

_I'm good at comforting, aren't I? Okay, that was a stupid question. I don't necessarily have the words for comfort, but I do have the nice pillowy body, apparently. And it isn't all about words, that's what she taught me. She's taught me a lot, this woman. I owe her a lot, too._

_I give a content sigh, and she brushes her lips against the underside of my jaw. I feel heat on my cheeks and neck again, but ignore it. That isn't what she needs right now. She needs a big, human, breathing pillow that she can cry on, even if she won't cry. At least she knows it's okay to. She's too proud to cry, but she needs to know I'm available for the job if she ever needs one._

_She nuzzles my neck with her nose, grips my shirt with her fists, and I trace lazy patterns on her back until we both fall asleep._

**A/N: **I enjoy being cruel to customers...heh...this was a bit of everything, humor, fluff, a bit of brooding...But, it's one thing that I find that isn't ever brough up in fics, or I've just been missing out on it. no one ever talks about Meteor's anniversary. I dunno, seemed like a good idea at the time. And Tifa is too proud to cry in front of Cloud, or at least let him see it. Let's face it, she doesn't want to be seen as weak...The reason for my rather depressing writing, and lack there of? My grandfather passed last Wednesday night, so I've been rather ...distracted. But, writing helps get it out, and keeps me moving, so I'm grateful for you guys...and now you see the inspiration for "to the man that said goodbye"...but! Enough ramblings. **Vin! **dude, tis okay to live in a reality of your own..very popular now a days, too. **Tincent! **Good to hear from you again! And don't worry about it, I understand. Just glad you got to read! **Calistar: **Haruki! Aww, I'm sorry you suffer so, but I'm sure it's not that bad. and yes, Denzel made a temporary absence...ahem, ignore that. **lord FF7:** Don't fear it! Embrace it! You're probably just scared by Sephy, he's a bit violent at times. hmm, you might not be talking to the best person about writing. Sometimes, I just sit down and force myself to write, even if it's complete BS, and then I read it, and I'm like...that sucks, and get inspiration to right something worthy of reading. **Rhyssa! **Even I don't know if Tifa saw it! ; **Bianka! **more contemplating..and the past, tis dangerous for Cloud...but it is a part of him. **Taco! **Good to hear from you again! Oh, and before you tell me, I know pillowy isn't a word, so back off! Well, hope you all enjoyed this chappie, **Later loves!**


	36. Eyes Worth Smiling For

_Eyes Worth Smiling For_

"_You what?!"_

"_Yuffie, please, keep it down," I hiss into the phone._

"_Wait...you're actually calling **me** while **she's **close by?"_

"_Well, she isn't that close, but..."_

_Yuffie's voice goes low, "And just **what** do you mean by that, Cloud?"_

"_I believe he means you are excessively loud."_

"_Shut up Vincent! No one asked you for your opinion...morbid cl-_

"_Wait, Vincent?" I'm confused...I called Yuffie._

"_You called me when Vince and I were talking, so I just pulled him over into the conversation," Yuffie stated._

"_Wait...you can do that?" I asked._

_She giggled, "Well, not exactly."_

"_She's talking to us on two separate phones, Cloud," Vincent explained, "And she's got us on speaker-phone."_

"_Ugh, you ruin everything Vincent. I was really going to see how long it was going to take him to figure this out," Yuffie whined._

"_I think you've deviated from the original subject, Yuffie."_

"_Oh! Right! Cloud; so, you're taking her out to dinner..." Yuffie states slowly._

"_Yes, correct," I whisper into the phone, glancing over my shoulder._

_Maybe Yuffie was right; maybe I should've waited until Tifa was gone, or until I was gone...or something like that._

_But no...I like it difficult. I like that chance of actually ruining everything._

_Cause, ya know, that's just me._

_Right._

"_Where? Are you going to-_

"_I'm not going back there, Yuffie. Trust me," I cut her off._

"_Oh! Right, I get it." she states, then changes her voice to a whisper, "He's still traumatized by that whole cake throwing incident."_

"_I can still hear you," I growl._

_Why does the only other female I know have to be Yuffie? I could've called Shera...but then I might've had to talk to Cid._

_Cid versus Yuffie...that is a hard choice._

"_Dude, like seriously though...why are you calling me," Yuffie asked._

_Good question._

"_Because Yuffie, I need you to..." I sigh, "I need you to buy a dress."_

_There's a silence._

"_I thought you were past those days, Clo-_

"_Shut **up**, Vincent. It isn't for me."_

"_Oh thank goodness...I was a bit worried for a minute. I mean, I know I have good taste and everything-_

"_Yuffie, concentrate here."_

_I take another glance over my shoulder at the door to the office. I've been lucky so far not to have any interruptions._

_Seriously, difficult is the only way to go._

"_Oh, right...so why...?"_

"_Well, you bought that dress for her for her birthday...and I figure you have the correct measurements, and it actually was a pretty nice dress-_

"_You're rambling, Cloud," Vincent cuts in, "It was a good choice though."_

_Oh yes, Vincent, fashion guru that you are...keep talking...and watch where you point those shoes, they're more deadly than that claw._

"_Why thank you Vincent," She beams, and then growls, "You have little faith in me, don't you Cloud?"_

"_Let's take a look at your track record, Yuffie."_

"_Excuse me?"_

"_He means you steal, which leads to a lack in trust, which leads to a lack in faith-_

"_Thank you Vincent! I can figure that out on my own," she shouts._

"_Then why did you ask," Vincent queries._

"_My God, Vincent, you really don't get sarcasm, or just...like any type of humor," Yuffie states._

_Okay, we aren't getting anywhere at all here...and I'm wasting precious time._

"_Guys, hey guys-_

"_I don't think that's completely true."_

"_Oh, really, Vincent? Please, enlighten me of your humor. Give me a joke, please. I am waiting, and I really, really, **really**, would like to hear this...please," Yuffie continues._

"_Guys-_

"_Fine."_

"_G-..." Wait, I want to hear this too._

"_Okay, I'm waiting Vincent."_

_I hear him clear his throat, and I find myself pressing the phone into my ear almost desperately. I mean, really...I've never actually heard Vincent tell a joke...not even a knock-knock joke or anything. And...well, I mean, I know I'm not one for jokes, but I mean really. You have to know at least one joke._

"_A naked blonde,"_

_This is Vincent? There's a side to him we didn't know._

"_...Walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says, 'I suppose you won't be needing a drink.' Naked lady says-_

"_Cloud!" _

_Son of a-_

"_Cloud, where are you?" _

_Tifa!_

_I hear her footsteps getting closer to the door, there's a thud, and then she's knocking on the door to my bedroom._

"_Cloud? You in there? I've got laundry..."_

_Err... _

"_I'm in the office, Teef."_

_The door opens, and she smiles, studying me with her eyes. I can hear cackling coming from the phone. I press it to my ear frantically, hoping to muffle the sound._

"_What are you doing in here," she asks._

"_Uh, I'm on the phone..."_

"_I can see that, Cloud." There's mischief to her smile._

"_Oh, well...yeah...uh, just clarifying deliveries...directions..."_

_She smiles, "Okay...well, do you mind if I put your laundry in your room?"_

_I frown, "No, of course not."_

"_Okay, well, lunch is almost done...you know, whenever you're done 'clarifying' and what not."_

"_Okay, thank you, Teef."_

_She smiles, one that touches her eyes, "You're welcome."_

_Knees...jelly..._

_She closes the door._

"_Ehmagawd...they...are...so...**cute**," Yuffie squeals._

"_Yuffie, please," Vincent starts._

"_What? Can I not admire them? It's cute, okay? Damn fricken cute."_

"_Yuffie...you sound strangely like Cid."_

"_Shut up!"_

"_Hey," I start, "I didn't get to hear the end of that joke...can I hear it now?"_

_But they're too busy bickering._

"_Cloud...didn't you need something," Yuffie asks._

"_Yes, the dress," Vincent supplies._

_But what about the joke? You can't just leave me hanging like that, can you?_

"_Oh! Yeah, like...what kind of style we talkin, Cloud...like sexy scandalous? Or...like, sexy tease? Or...um, sexy conservative with slight teasing but not enough to draw too much attention?"_

_...What?_

"_Um...I like the not drawing too much attention."_

"_So, like, knee-length?"_

"_...sure?"_

"_Okay, okay," I think she's writing this down. "Like, with not too much attention...erm, we could probably go one strap-_

"_No."_

"_You're right, knee-length and one strap? A little much...you **are** good at this, Cloud."_

_Shut up!_

_She continues, "So like, are we looking for a pattern?"_

_Pattern? What? This is getting too complicated._

"_Not really..." I don't know!_

"_So, like, maybe a little something, but nothing overpowering?"_

"_...sure..."_

"_You don't sound sure, Cloud," Vincent says._

"_I am." _

"_Heh, Vince is right, Cloud. Not sure at all..."_

"_I guess," Oh this hurts to say, "I guess I'll just have to trust your judgement."_

_Another silence._

"_Ehmahgawd...that is like...somebody, please...tell me someone got that on tape. I need actually evidence, nay, proof, that Cloud Strife is trusting my judgement."_

"_It is a frightening thing to consider," Vincent replies._

"_Don't ruin the moment, Vince," she turns her attention back to me, "So, like...you're covering this, right?"_

"_What? Oh, yes. I'll pay...shoes, and the dress."_

"_Gas money?"_

"_What?"_

"_Cloud! I need transportation! Who knows where the hell the perfect dress is going to be, and you do want the perfect dress, right?" She asks._

"_...Yes...but I want receipts."_

"_You're no fun! So...I guess we're done here...and you can go eat lunch with your lover," Yuffie teases._

"_Yuff-_

"_Wait...what about the color," Vincent asks._

_Yeah, that would help._

"_Same as her eyes."_

_Yuffie snorts, "Cloud...you have...you can't be serious."_

"_What? Her eyes are the perfect color."_

"_No...please...you can't be that dense," Yuffie laughs._

"_What are you talking about," I ask, I'm starting to get annoyed here._

_Her laughter dies, "You're serious, aren't you?"_

_I nod, though it's futile._

_But I think she knows I nod, because she keeps talking._

"_You are...no, no way...geez Kuh-loud...you are an original, aren't you?" _

"_What..." stay calm, Cloud, "...is the problem, Yuffie?"_

"_What's the problem? Damn, I know Tifa can work any color, but brown? And especially for this occasion-_

"_Wait, brown?"_

_Whose eyes has she been looking at?_

"_Tifa's eyes aren't brown," I argue._

"_What? Yes they are! Do you know how peeved she'd be if you didn't know what color her eyes are?"_

"_Yuffie, her eyes aren't brown. I think I'd know."_

"_Well, obviously you don't...tell me, Cloud, what color are her eyes?"_

"_Red," I state, it's obvious, "...kind of like wine; they get little flecks of gold in them in the sun."_

_There's another silence before Yuffie replies._

"_God, Cloud...as poetic as that was...well, I mean, they aren't red...I mean, the only red-eyed person I know...well, I hope you aren't buying a dress for **him**."_

"_Yuffie!" _

_We pause, seeing that both Vincent and I yelled it at the same time._

_I don't know what to say. How can she be that dense? I mean, obviously her eyes are red, not brown...I swear, she's...she's a complete idiot._

"_He's right, though, Yuffie," Vincent's voice breaks the silence._

"_What? No he isn't!"_

"_Yes, Yuffie...he is. You just have to pay attention. Tifa's eyes are red," Vincent pauses, "...but they're only red when she looks at him."_

_What?_

"_What," Yuffie asks, "Is that even possible?"_

"_Apparently," Vincent replies._

_Yuffie sighs, "Okay, obvious you guys are color-blind..." I'm about to argue, "But! Since this is Tifa, and since you so totally want this night perfect, well..a red dress it is...with gold flecks in the sun."_

"_You know, Tifa was the only one he smiled at," Vincent says._

"_What are you talking about?" Yuffie asks._

_Even I'm curious._

"_When we fought Bahumut in Edge." My eyes narrow._

_I hear Yuffie gasp, "**Really**," she coos, "How do you know?"_

_Yes, how does he know?_

"_Tifa told me he smiled at her. I asked her what it was like to see him smiling again after he healed Denzel. She told me he was already smiling again."_

"_Holy crap, that is like...the most romantical thing I have ever heard. That is frickin adorable. He had his little brow furrowed, and those eyes just narrowed in determination, or at least he did when I saw him. But he took time to smile?"_

"_Yes," I can practically hear the smile in Vincent's voice._

_Must they speak as if I'm not even here?_

"_Awwwwww! That is so cute! He smiled, in the face of danger because of true love! That's like, novel worthy."_

"_Were her eyes red then, Cloud?" Vincent asks._

"_Red with gold flecks?" Yuffie adds._

_I hit my head against the wall; they won't let me live that down._

"_What was that noise," but Yuffie stops caring, "So, Cloud...is this like...the dinner? The question? The night? Huh? Huh? You have to tell me, or else I'm so totally not going to buy this dress for you. It's been what, a month, month and a half, since her birthday?"_

"_..."_

"_Even I'm curious, Cloud," Vincent adds._

"_I...don't know...it might be...too soon."_

"_Too soon? Too soon?! It's anything **but** too soon! You guys, have known each other since what, childhood? Okay, granted maybe not close, but still! And, you've...been like, living with each other for how many years?! And...you've had this immense crush on her for like...two...three...four years now? And aren't you in love with her? Stop me if I'm wrong."_

"_It isn't...that simple Yuffie."_

"_But you, you're ready, aren't you? You've been ready for a long time, haven't you?"_

"_Yuffie..."_

"_So what's the problem?"_

"_I don't know...if she's ready...I don't know...if I'm ready...I mean, that...it's a big thing."_

"_You've given this a lot of thought, Cloud?" Vincent asks._

"_Yes."_

"_You love her?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Then don't plan it," Vincent replies._

"_What?!" Yuffie screeches._

"_Take her out to dinner, that's fine. But...you'll know when it's the right time, if you're still unsure. Take it with you, it might be the right time then. It might not. Eventually, you'll know if you're sure, if she's sure, and when the right time comes."_

_Another moment of silence._

"_Okay." That doesn't sound so unreasonable._

_Yuffie sighs, "Okay, but you might be setting her up here. I'll get the dress for you. How much time?"_

"_Two weeks."_

_I hear a soft click, but ignore it._

"_Alrighty, consider Yuffie Kisaragi hired and on the mission!"_

_I imagine her punching her fist in the air, and shake my head._

"_Good. And...thanks, both of you."_

"_Hey, that's what we're here for," Yuffie replies._

_There's a grunt of response from Vincent, and I smirk slightly, feeling slightly relieved to have finally accomplished something._

"_What's it look like," Yuffie asks._

"_Can't you just wait?"_

"_No! I don't know how long I'll be waiting."_

"_Pearl, and silver."_

_Yuffie scoffs, "Oh great description!"_

"_It's in a little red box. Velvet and what not...It's Midgar Jewelers; it's a circle. Does that help?" I ask._

_I hear a soft gasp, and a thud._

"_Yuffie?"_

"_That wasn't you, Cloud?"_

"_Vincent?"_

"_No."_

_The color drains from my face._

"_...You're on...the bar phone?!" Yuffie whispers, yet some how manages to scream._

"_Hang up the phone, just hang up the phone," Vincent says softly._

_I quickly put the phone back on the receiver._

_Oh..._

_Great...just great._

_Someone is in on my ruse, and possibly the most important person._

_And I didn't even get to hear Vincent's joke._

_Dammit!_

**A/N: **Ah, it's a good day when you can mess with Cloud's head. And with YOUSE guys's head...heads...yeah. I didn't feel the need to continue Meteor's anniversary, just for the fact it'd be more brooding, blah de blah. Some brooding, okay, but not too much...and that was like, two chunk full chapters of contemplating! So Cloud got tortured. Completely makes sense. The whole thing with the red eyes? I dunno, Squeenix tried to make everything realistic, and one of Tifa's coolest things physically is her eyes. Because, like, they're natural (And I know what you GUYS are thinking. Eyes up, boys) Seriuosly, guys, ever want some brownie points with a gal, completely just surprise them with eye descriptions. Or, at least, that'd score brownie points with me.And I thought that was incredibly sweet when Cloud smiles at Tifa when fighting Bah.! He does, in case you missed that. And! another random AC fact, at the begining when the silver haired trio shows up, Loz and Yazoo trade places...like, when they go flying off the cliff after Cloudie boy. I thought it was interesting. Little things like that...they catch my attention, and I like to keep you informed. So many new people reviewed this time! Hello! It's always nice to know I'm getting new fans, and getting fans period...well, that's just awesome! And, of course, all the old fans, you guys are the great awesomeness as well.

**Cookies to the people that know where Vincent's joke is from...educate the world, people. Let those ignorant learn something important! EDUCATE!**

later loves


	37. Who Loves The World's Bitch?

_Who Loves The World's Bitch?_

_Breathe. Just. Breathe._

_We're okay. It's okay. ...breathe._

_The surprise wasn't ruined. Someone in the house just knows that I have something in a box that's circular, from Midgar Jewelers, and has silver and pearls on it._

_Nothing for anyone to be suspicious about at all._

_Nope, nothing at all._

_So...you can just take that first step. Go on. Tifa's lunch is waiting for you. Start moving. Step. Step. Step._

_MOVE DAMMIT!_

_Man, I'm not going to get far, am I? Even with my conscious coaching me and telling me it's all okay._

_Man, Strife, you're a real winner, let me tell you. It's one thing to have to ask for help from Yuffie..._

_But it's a completely different embarrassment when it all goes wrong, and you're the one to blame...and not Yuffie._

_So what if Tifa did hear? It could be a bracelet. Or...a necklace. It could be a really spiffy dog collar!_

_...or it could be a ring._

_So what if it is a ring? That doesn't mean it has to be **the** ring._

_But that doesn't mean it isn't._

_I sigh, and knock my head against the wall. _

_I fear rings. Every male fears ring. It's a rule. Rings mean commitment, and it's not that I fear commitment._

_Rings can either seal the deal, or just completely screw it all over._

_Honestly, contradicting myself is getting me nowhere. So, I think I'm actually going to try and move towards the door._

_Ahem...I said move towards the door._

_Finally my body complies, and my feet start moving normally. I reach the door, open it, close it, open it, cl-_

_JUST WALK THROUGH IT._

_Thank you._

_Anyways, close the door behind me, descend the steps and slowly turn towards the bar. Tifa's behind the bar washing some dishes, and there's four plates laid out on a table. Marlene and Denzel are poking each other where they sit, giggling and whispering._

_...do they know something?_

_They do know something, don't they? Little conniving mini-Yuffies. They know **everything**. Look at how they're whispering...definitely about me. Always. Me. Yes. And how I suck at life and doing anything right._

"_Hey, Teef." _

_Tifa jumps slightly, and puts a hand on her chest, "Cloud! Don't do that, you startled me!"_

_What, did my squeaking startle you? Or did she mean startle as in 'you may be hiding a circular object from Midgar Jewelers that could possibly be a ring...or a really spiffy dog collar'._

_She looks up at me, blushing, with her **red **eyes, thank you very much._

_Do they say, 'Come on big boy, ask me now!' or 'What the hell is he thinking?!'?_

_The world is cruel. That's the only thing I've learned from life. The world is freaking cruel, and just likes to see me suffer. That's it, and that's all. I'm the world's little mouse they send hunting through a maze for a piece of cheese...and every time I get anywhere near that **damn** cheese, there's a freaking plexiglass wall between me and it, and I run into it and smash my little mouse nose up against that freaking plexiglass wall...because the world hates me, and I'm its bitch._

"_Oh, uh...Cloud. I need to talk to you for a minute."_

_Oh..._

_No..._

"_N-...o..kay."_

_Crap oh crap oh crap._

_She yanks me into the storage room, unawares to the children. Clicking on the light above, she glances at me, then glances away, turning red._

_No! She can't know, can she? I mean...that would...be against all common sense. She didn't hear me, dammit._

"_Cloud...I want you to know...that..." she pauses, and takes a deep breath, "That..."_

_What?! What do you want me to know?! Spit it out, woman!_

"_Iounting," she mumbles beneath her breath._

_What? Did I hear an 'ing' in that, as in ring? Or, as in a spiffing dog collar. ...I don't even think that's a word._

"_W- _

_Get your voice under control, Cloud. Come on, no squeaking._

_I clear my throat, "W-what?"_

_She is blood red now, okay people? She is **red**, and I mean red. I don't think I've ever seen her blushing so badly._

"_I found something."_

_...she found something? Found something out? Or found an object?_

_Pat pockets discreetly, now!_

_Ring's still there. What did she find?_

"_You found something?"_

"_Yes," her voice is a hoarse whisper._

_She clears her throat, "Cloud...I mean. It's not that...well, I just need time to think about it."_

_My heart drops. She needs time to think about it? Are we on the same page? She isn't thinking about what I'm thinking about thinking about, is she?_

_...Okay, I didn't even understand that._

_But...she doesn't...want to marry me? Why doesn't she want to marry me? I mean, I'm a pretty good guy, I'm alright. I saved the world twice, you know. I...um...what else did I do?_

_Maybe it's because I'm the world's bitch. That's got to be a turnoff. _

_I think she sees the disappointment on my face, I mean, how do you hide that? I mean, I know I'm good at being expressionless, but I don't think I'm **that** good._

"_Oh, Cloud...well, we haven't even talked about it," she says._

_Okay, let's talk right now. Talk. Say something idiot. Not Tifa, this is your subconscious speaking. Use your mouth and annunciate some type of word._

"_Wh...what are we talking about here?"_

_She blinks, surprise written across her face, "About...well, when I was in your room...I was just putting up laundry...I didn't mean to..."_

_She heard me. Oh God she heard me and she doesn't want to marry me._

"_It's a spiffy dog collar," I mumble beneath my breath._

"_**What**?" she asks._

"_Nothing."_

"_Did you say something about a dog?"_

"_No."_

"_Oh," she drops her eyes._

_Does she want a dog? I can do dogs._

_Wait...I mean, I can get a dog...handle a dog, not do a dog._

_Erg. Yeah, walked right into that one._

"_Well, I guess I should give it back to you."_

_What? Give it back? Did the ring fall out of the box? _

_And I didn't notice?!_

_What kind of man am I?! No wonder she doesn't want to marry me! I'm not even a man! I'm a mouse!_

"_Here," she whispers, shoving something in my hand._

_She goes to hurry out of the room, but it isn't a ring she puts in my hand, it's a..._

_**Oh my God.** I am going to fucking kill Barret._

"_Tifa! Wait, Tifa...this isn't mine."_

_She whirls on me, "**What**? That isn't yours? Whose is it? I found it in your drawer."_

_I look down at the little square package in my hand, "I...I think Barret put it in my room...when, when he slept there."_

_I see relief flood into her eyes, "Oh."_

"_Yeah. I think...he just didn't want us to do something...and do something stupid...well, not saying that would be stupid...I mean, I just...think he wanted us to think it through, or at least be smart about doing it. Wait! I mean...not that...not that we should be doing it, unless you want to-to, but like you said, we haven't even talked about it...and..."_

_Shut. Up. Now. Idiot._

_She's turning red, and I'm turning red. Why is this so embarrassing, really? It's a safe precaution, although it really didn't help the situation at **all**. As in I thought she knew about her ring, which I'm pretty sure she doesn't now._

_I sigh, and pocket the thing._

"_Well...I'm...okay. Then. Alright. I just, thought we should talk about it, but since it isn't yours," she gives a nervous chuckle, "Or...rather, since Barret left it for us-you, it's okay. I just wanted to talk to you about it."_

"_It's up to you, Teef, you know that."_

_She smiled, blushed a little, looking pleased, "Thank you, Cloud."_

"_Of course, Tifa."_

_She turns to walk out, then pauses, "Oh, will you grab that crate over there for me, please?"_

"_Huh? This one? Okay," I turn away, stooping to pick it up, glad that whole awkward situation is out of the way._

_Barret dies the next time I see him._

_That's when I feel her hand on my back, "Well, Cloud...what did you think I was talking about?"_

"_Uh..." Good job suave, how are you going to talk your way out of this one?_

"_It's okay," she kisses my cheek over my back, and I hear her swallow._

_I slowly stand, crate in hands, but I'm not sure if I should move yet, because she's still behind me, and she's shifting on her feet, I can hear her._

"_Okay then...well, um..." she stutters around her words._

_I hear her walk towards the doorway, and I listen to her steps receding; they pause for a moment, and I hear her say my name under her breath. I strain my ears, trying to hear what she's going to say next._

_It was such a soft whisper, so delicate, I'm afraid to believe she actually said it. That she actually said those words, and I'm trying to figure out if she meant for me to hear them, or if she just said them under her breath, or what brought this about, or if she actually did hear me, and is just hiding it, or what the hell it's all suppose to mean._

_Still, even with all these doubts, these questions in my mind, it didn't change my reaction one bit._

_The crate full of wine bottles hit the floor and shattered about two seconds after I registered what she said._

_About two seconds after she told me she loved me._

_**A/N:** _Complete ass...I completely forgot to mention our milestone of 400 reviews...slap me, please. I feel bad for letting this sit for so long, but like, PLOT BUNNIES ATTACKED ME. I've been working on this one new story for like, four days. Erg, and neglecting everything else. Slap me, please. Dude...like, I didn't know where I was going to take this with the last chappie, but then, I just imagined that whole awkward moment w/ Tifa/Cloud about a condom. That's what it was, in case you were wondering. This story **is **rated T, guys. Anyways, so, you can all tell me what you think Tifa did/did not hear. Anyways, OMAHGOSH drooollllsss...I watched the trailer for Crisis Core...drool...I just fell in love with FFVII all over again. Seriously. Zack and Aerith...CUTE...so adorable, like, my heart just got all warm. Further proof that those two ditzes belong together. I mean, just the little details in body movement they put in. I want that music, too. Zack dies, leaves poor Aerith by her lonesome. But it's great, so watch it if you haven't. And we already know it's going to be such a tragic story. LOVE IT. And it's just a trailer. Gosh, I'm such a geek. **SHUT UP MEILI**...I did not do that, checks Ohmahgod I did...-.-;;;;;...ahem, we'll just say he wanted it to match her eyes...and got a new box...I love messing with everyone's head, and thanks for reviewing so much as of the late!...**Sephy:** T.T where did you go?! I haven't seen you in like, three weeks! T.T...this is me mourning you. **Vin: **hehe, Vincent does have humor. And I agree about him being dry. **Calistar: **We STILL don't know. **Rhyssa: **dude, like, Yuffie probably stole the ring while she was there, found out, and told Cid, and THATs why they completely pressured him about proposing. Yep. that's it. Ugh, my brain hurts guys...HURTS. I hate calculus, and physics. Anyone want to save me? I'll respond to reviews next time. My brain is mushy...mush...pleh

**I shower LAVVY in cookies for getting the reference. It was Breakfast Club, and there is no punch line to that joke. :P**


	38. Is This A Bad Time?

_Is This A Bad Time?_

_It's strange, really, how some things work out. How one minute you think you're the world's bitch, and the next you realize...hey, maybe world doesn't hate me so much. Hey, maybe, every now and then, after 'world' gets its laugh, they lift that plexiglass wall up and let me have a bite of that cheese._

_...That..._

_That or I take my mighty freaking sword and chop that freaking plexiglass wall down with my bad ass mouse self._

_Take that world...take that._

_Whose the bitch, now?_

_And maybe, I shouldn't be thinking thoughts like this after the woman I love just confessed her love for me..._

_Well, she didn't._

_No, wait...I mean, she did...she just didn't do it though._

_...You know, I've realized something else. Even though everything that happened before Geostigma was serious, and awful...have you realized how much I've been through **after** Geostigma?_

_Well, boys and girls, it all started with a date._

_Somehow, we've made it this far..._

_Here's a little recap:_

_I nearly busted my head open changing a light bulb, I compared Tifa to maps, I accidentally pulled the shower curtain on Tifa; I swear, it was an accident. I somehow managed to keep a secret from Yuffie, I managed a successful Valentine's Day, complete with kiss, I succumbed to nightmares, survived mini-Yuffies, read bedtime stories, had my girlfriend's underwear slung-shot across a full bar...with all best intentions, granted. I had cake batter thrown in my face, chased away scary customers, got related to the Turks' finest (That was a joke), got in a fight with Tifa, kissed Tifa in public, threw a surprise birthday party with two unexpected guests, an exploding banana, and a kamikaze cake._

_I've spent the night in Tifa's bed, woken up to play a deadly game of hide and seek with Barret, hung out of my bedroom window in blue boxers (now ashes), got lectured by Cid Highwind, got embarrassed by Cid Highwind, got conned into proposing to Tifa by Cid Highwind, and Yuffie(not that I mind), squashed by Cid Highwind and Yuffie, managed to miss out on one of the best eavesdropping opportunities, witnessed the death of a penguin and Vincent getting attacked by Marlene, got conned into telling Tifa I love her (again, not that I mind), called Vincent Valentine a morbid clown, and threw up all over the place. _

_I unconventionally told Tifa I loved her, found the ring I bought so many odd years ago, lived through another Meteor anniversary, witnessed Tifa cry, asked Yuffie for help, and possibly ruined the biggest surprise of anyone's life, discovered I was the world's bitch, discovered Barret's taking things into his own hands, and discovered that Tifa, does in fact love me._

_Now...I don't know, but I think that is a lot of bullshit to go through to get the love of your life to confess their feelings for you..._

_And she didn't even say it to my face._

_She abandoned me not even a half a second after she said it._

_She didn't even check on me when I dropped the crate, because, as I said earlier, it's strange how things work out._

_It was very strange when, about a second after Tifa told me she loved me, the power went out._

_**Then** the crate dropped, and the glass shattered...but then, there was an excuse as to why, other than the fact that Tifa had in fact just confessed her feelings to me._

_It's amazing the little things you fail to notice when agitated._

_Marlene screamed, whether from the glass breaking, or the thunder, I don't know._

"_Cloud?! Are you okay?!" Marlene yelled from somewhere._

"_Yeah, I'm fine," how did that come out without a squeak?_

_I sigh, the glass crunching beneath my feet as I turn. I've never been so grateful for steel-toed boots...else I might've been missing a few toes._

_I glance up, hearing someone stumble back into the storage room._

_It's Marlene, and its dark because there's no windows in the storage room, and the lights are out._

"_Marlene, stay where you are," I say, eyeing her bare feet, "There's glass on the floor."_

_I see her jump slightly, and shiver, "So you're okay?"_

"_Yes, Marlene. I'm fine. Where's Tifa?"_

"_I dunno, I saw her come out of the storage room, but lost track of her when the lights went out. Clllooouuuddd, what's happening?" she whines._

_Marlene is not a big fan of thunder storms._

_To prove this point she squeals when lightening flashes from the bar._

"_It's okay, Marlene...it's just a storm," I move quickly across the floor._

_Mako, does wonders for your night vision._

"_Come on."_

_She jumps slightly when I put a hand on her shoulder. It's amazing how dark it got so quickly. I swallow, it almost remind me of..._

"_Cloud..." she whines, clinging to my hand._

"_It's alright, Marlene...let's go find Denz and Teef, okay?"_

"_Okay," she whispers, tightening her grip._

_It's lighter outside of the store room, but still a darkness hangs in the air. Denzel's still sitting at the table, unperturbed, eating his lunch. I lead Marlene over, deposit her in her seat, and pat her head._

"_You're okay now," I state, rummaging around for some candles._

"_But Cloud! It's a storm!"_

_Honestly, I don't understand the child. Elmyra told me once that she just watched Meteor in pure fascination, not fear or anything...yet here she stands, frightened of a thunder storm...I don't get it._

_I light the candles for the two, "Don't touch them. If you need more light, get me or Tifa..."_

_I glance around, "Denzel, did you see where Tifa went?"_

_Denzel glanced up at me, "I think upstairs...or outside...I don't know, she moved so quick out of that store room, I couldn't tell where she went when the lights went off."_

"_Stay here. I'm going to find her."_

"_It's not like she could've went that far, Cloud," Denzel states._

"_Yeah, but, it's not like her to go running off because of a storm, Denz-el. Duh," Marlene snaps back._

_Well, we all know why she ran off._

"_Just stay here, please."_

"_Okay, Cloud."_

_I sigh, walking away. I'll check upstairs first. Sure, she isn't afraid of storms, but honestly, why would she run outside?_

"_Teef? You up here?" I'm surprised I'm acting as calm as I am. _

_I mean, the woman did just confess her love to me. Shouldn't I be elated or something? Shouldn't we be like, intertwined in hot passion or something? I mean, isn't that how it normally goes? Aren't you suppose to confess your love in like some romantic scene complete with bubble bath and scented candles? I mean, we've got candles, but they're for light...and as for bubble bath? Come on people...bath plus lightening equals bad news._

_Oh sure, something will be hot, but it won't be passion intertwining._

'_...I really...came back...at the wrong time...didn't I?'_

_...no...just your imagination Cloud. Ignore it. It will go away._

'_Uh, no 'it' will not, and I'll have you know, I'm not an 'it', I'm a man...a big strong man!'_

_Oh my God...he's back._

'_Yessire! I am! And what was all this about hot passion intertwining?'_

_No...oh no...please, someone save me!_

'_Zack, what are you doing?'_

_God it's both of them!_

'_Cloud, you okay?'_

_Guys, please...why are you here?_

'_Aw, Aerith, listen to him! He sounds so pathetic...course, judging by his earlier thoughts I can't blame him. Something that was suppose to involve hot intertwining passion did not happen.'_

'_...is this a bad time?'_

_Yes! No! I mean...dammit Zack, why couldn't you just keep your mouth shut!_

_I sigh._

_Listen, I'm looking for Tifa. I have something to talk to her about–_

'_Hot intertwining passion?'_

'_Zack, shut up. I want to hear this.'_

_I need to find Tifa...can you tell me where she is?_

'_Sure. She's outside.'_

_Outside?! In this weather?_

'_Cloud, what did you do?'_

_Nothing Aerith! For once, it wasn't me, I swear._

'_She did something?'_

_Yes! But not bad!_

'_How can it not be bad...you didn't get your hot intertwining passion.'_

_Oh make it stop!_

'_Zack...' Aerith reprimanded him, 'We'll come back later. Obviously you two have something to talk about.'_

'_But I wanna watch!'_

'_Zack!'_

_There was a sufficient Whack! And they both were gone. I was little shocked at how smoothly they came in. I didn't even realize it._

_Course, I am a bit preoccupied right now._

_So, down the steps, check the children, there they are, Tifa's patting Marlene's head, head outside, Tifa's patting Marlene's head..._

_Damn she is moving fast today._

_She glances up at me, blushes looks back down, "Power's out all over the block."_

_So is that your excuse for going outside? Don't think you'll get away with this that easily, woman._

"_Oh, really?"_

"_Yes. Don't know when it'll be back on," she's mumbling._

"_Hey, can we take some candles upstairs to our room to play?" Denzel asks._

"_But the storm will be closer!"_

_I don't get Marlene, really._

"_Why don't you two bring some games down here, okay?"_

_Denzel nods his head, "Okay. Come on Marlene."_

_Marlene stands quickly, and Tifa hands her a flashlight I didn't even know she had. Denzel glances up at me as he rushes by, Marlene hot on his heels._

_They both disappear upstairs, and I wait until I hear their door close._

_And so we are left in one helluva awkward silence._

_I mean it. Is. BIG._

_But, surprisingly, I'm not quivering in my steel-toe boots here...I'm actually a little mad. And Tifa won't even look up at me, she's too busy cleaning up from lunch...a lunch neither of us have had._

_I'm not very hungry now._

"_Tifa?"_

"_Yeah?" her hands are shaking as she carries the plates over._

_I'm there in three steps. I take the plates from her hands roughly, and set them in the sink, and turn back around in about two seconds._

_I'm surprised she didn't run, course, she's probably surprised I'm reacting this way...or that I even heard at all._

_My voice is firm, "You can't just say that and walk away."_

_She blushes even worse, "What are you talking about?"_

_She gives a nervous smile before turning to go collect more dishes, but not this time. I reach out and grab her wrist, not roughly...I don't want to hurt her, well, I mean, I probably couldn't hurt her physically by grabbing her wrist...if anything, it'd probably backfire and I'd end up with an assortment of bruises._

_I mean like, emotionally, or mentally. Women, they're unstable creatures. You don't know what the hell is going to happen until it happens._

_But I'm a brave man, and I'm grabbing her wrist dammit, and I'm not taking no for an answer._

"_You know what I'm talking about."_

"_Cloud, stop being cryptic," she narrows her eyes, before jerking her wrist away._

_Oh, oh no. Get your butt back here, woman._

"_Now just hang on a second, Tifa."_

"_What?" she asks irritably._

_...What if she didn't say it? What if it was just my imagination? What...oh my God. What if I just thought it up, and in the moment...what if?_

_She's marching away, up the steps. Hey! She didn't hang on!_

"_T–...Tifa!" I move quickly after her, blowing past the kids' bedroom._

_She's disappeared into her bedroom, and I open the door quickly after her without knocking._

_She whirls on me, a dangerous glint in her eye. Honestly, I'm fearing here people. Fear. Why is she so pissed off at me? Why does...why does she look so angry?_

_What do I do? She looks like she's about to jump at my throat and rip it out. What do I do?! What **did** I do?!_

_Honestly, why do my eyes have to glow in the dark? She can't see anything else, I know she can't. It's too dark for her, and I know she was just moving by memory. So all she's got to focus on here or my freaking neon-eyes here._

_I swallow. Her glare really is unnerving._

_Then she breaks the gaze and sighs, looking away. She starts to walk towards her bathroom, and she leaves me standing there._

_I hear the shower turn on, a thunder clap, and the shower turns back off again. Even from here, I can hear her pacing in the bathroom._

_I wait about fifteen minutes before she finally comes back out, now in her robe and slippers. She still can't see me, I can see her though._

_Of course, at this point and time, it doesn't even register that she can't see me._

"_Tifa."_

_She screams and flings a slipper in my general direction. Whoops. I don't think she was expecting me to still be here. The slipper hits harmlessly against the wall behind my head, and I cross the distance between us in a couple steps. I know she knows where I am now, but she still can't see me. This is dangerous waters I'm treading in._

"_Tifa," it's almost a whisper._

_I reach out, delicately touching her arm to let her know I'm there, and she doesn't even flinch. Lightening plays across the room, and she looks up at me, straight into my eyes._

"_I love you," and it isn't me who says it._

"_Yeah, I know," I reply before leaning down to kiss her. _

_It's a gentle kiss, and it's a new one, knowing now that she loves me. It's different, and it's the same, but it's better._

"_I love you too."_

**A/N:** Cue dramatic music! ...that was fun. Okay, so like, it's what chapter 38?!!?!?!! That's crazy you guys! It's great, but it's crazy! And as I'm writing this...467 REVIEWS! AHHH! I must be like, the luckiest cloti author ever. I LOVE YOU ALL! Okay, down to business now. Actually, my favorite line in this entire chapter was Aerith saying '...is this a bad time?' I dunno, I just loved it. Here comes the awesomeness!

**Sabith: **I was kind of worried if the awkwardness would be too overplayed, and thanks for reviewing so much!

**Niktastic: **dude! You've got to love the spiffy dog collar!

**Calistar! **You still don't know if Tifa heard! bwhaha...and I'm sure you're fighting the ultimate urge of squeeing once again. I was too earlier. Haruki can handle a good squee every now and then. Does the body good.

**saegae: **bwha! I'm surprised no one's realized it before.

**Vin! **Yes! You should've known! But I'll forgive you.

**kikyo-hime: **What do you mean how could I?! Cliffhangers are like, what I do. That's how I roll, don't cha know:P

**Lavvy: **Eh, I get that. Enjoy your cookies!

**Janetelle: **Dude, every now and then, like, I remember how sexy Cloud is...then I'm like...wow, Cloud IS sexy.

**anime girlie! **Yeah, I was like...that might be a bit much for a chapter title. still, glad you liked it!

**onewingedangel! **and so he does. Tifa had to run away first, but its all good.

**Andalite: **Dude, I'm going to love writing Barret's demise!

**tri17: **Oh yay! i'm glad you're letting me know what you think...just so I can prove everyone wrong in the end! Bwhaha.

**Ghostly: **I don't know...I guess it would be a bit startling to find one in your boyfriend's drawers...or it might not of been. But I couldn't resist.

**numbertwo! **OMAGAWD! CC TRAILER equals AWESOME. oh, I hadn't thought of that angle. Original! Nice job!

**Iskra Revoir! **ah, I have to make you wait until you can hear THE question! Where's the fun in that?! And you got another appearance of Mouse-Cloud. i want a mouse-cloud. OH! And for CC! Just go to and search for it. If you can't find it, I'll send you a link, no prob:P

**zaz9-zaa0: **I honestly can't see how cleri's want to seperate zack and aerith. They're TOO cute. And if you see the CC trailer, you totally understand that. Totally.

**lisilgirl! **oh don't hurt your computer! OMG, yes, I did want to know that. That is classic right there. I've seen those adds too.

**kurokumo14: **yay! Glad you love it, and Tifa was the first one...that's teh shocking part.

**Sparx! **hey! Tis alright if you don't review every chapter. I hope your school-soul theft problem is resolved soon, and I should be posting some new stuff this weekend. I still want to see the death of Pen-Pen...and maybe a mouse-cloud

**Toons: **okay, okay, I'll let it slide. I know, the poor wine...what a waste. Thanks!

**elebelly! **calm down! hee, it's okay! thanks!

**lelapa17: **I'm sorry I couldn't udate at that moment...but I tried to get it out ASAP

**chierian9el: **You STILL don't know!

**Teef Lockhart: **oh, I feel honored by your compliment! Thanks!

**Rend! **Well, did I succeed in getting better? Now I have an awesome excuse to go out and buy a PSP.

**Zenbon! **yes, it is a condom. I told you! XP


	39. Even With Rocks On The Floor

_Even With Rocks On The Floor..._

"_I'm carrying you."_

"_You are not, Cloud."_

"_Yes, I am."_

"_No, you **aren't**. I'm perfectly capable of walking on my own, thank you very much," Tifa crosses her arms, and holds her head even higher._

_I sigh, and shake my head slightly. Really, any other time I'd agree. But, it's been a long day._

_Let me tell you, the world really does hate me...because I didn't get my hot intertwining passion, and I **still** haven't, okay! So, as soon as we get another good kiss in after confessing our love for each other, the power comes back on. Okay, still got time for hot, intertwining passion._

_Wrong._

_Children._

_That's all I have to say._

_Seriously._

_They've been there all frickin week! And trust me, I normally do not mind them being there, but for some reason, they're just everywhere! And Zack and Aerith **said **they were coming back, and they haven't yet...so that's got me on edge, cause I know the moment those kids finally disappear for more than fifteen minutes, Zack's going to pop up in my head with some stupid snarky comment about hot, intertwining passion._

_Maybe I should bring you up to speed, you know, explain why Tifa and I are walking through the rain, and why she's in heels._

_So, like I said, children everywhere. Two days ago, we get a call from Cid. Guess what? A date's been set._

_So, me and Teef have got to go out to Rocket Town and start getting fitted for dresses and tuxes and what not._

_Barret's the best man, and Shera's sister is the maid of honor. Hell, we even met Shera's parents. Her father is scary. Very scary. I see clashes in future family gatherings. Beware, Cid, that's all I have to say._

_Anyways, so that passes without event, which is shocking, because most of the time, something bad happens, especially when the infamous Cid Highwind is involved._

_Wait, something did happen, but it's after we left._

_Here's what happened, really, that led us to our current situation._

_I'm riding on Fenrir, we're a ways past Junon, and it's late. Junon was the only port we could get to at the hour we got back. Why Cid couldn't be kind and just take us back to Edge on his airship? Because he's a meanie, that's why._

_Seriously, he is._

_So, Tifa's riding behind me, her arms wrapped around my back securely, and like I said earlier, I'm on edge. Marlene and Denzel stayed behind to visit with Barret. He's taking them to the Golden Saucer. Good luck, Barret. I salute you._

_So, we're on our way back, and it starts raining. Son of a bitch. I really am not in the mood for a cold, and I'm sure Tifa isn't either. Still, at least we're moving, and we're almost back to Edge. But life just likes to be a bitch._

_Fenrir...how could you? You never betray me...never...and yet, you do. The one time, man the one freaking time I needed you to pull through and you bite me in the ass...literally. He did, I'm serious._

_I don't have a freaking clue what happened, all I know is suddenly we're spinning out of control, and Fenrir goes down, and as a result, we go down. So, like were sliding along, and Fenrir hits a rock, and we go flying off of it, painfully I might add, and land on our ass. Well, Fenrir goes spinning around on his side, and his wheel (still spinning rather fast) bites my ass. Well, that's what it felt like. _

_And he would not start again. Apparently he was as traumatized as I was at him biting my ass._

_So, that's what resulted in the two of us walking down an empty street looking for signs of civilization, my butt burned, and Tifa in pain._

_Why didn't she bring more than one pair of shoes, really? I mean, I know Shera said Tifa needed heels to try on her bridesmaid dress with, but why, why?!_

_She's wearing these heels, rather sexy I must say, but damn she's in pain...and she won't admit it, because she's in one seriously bad mood...and I fear her._

_So, I'm trying to be the good guy, but she's being too proud to let me._

_Life freaking sucks._

_This is not the week after 'confess love' I expected. Man this sucks. One thing goes right, and about a billion other things go terribly wrong._

"_Wah!" _

_And she's down! _

_Tifa's heel twists and she falls on her back in the mud. She hisses as she sits up, propping herself up on her hands. And she just looks so pitiful, with her hair all muddy and plastered, and her clothes wet and torn. And she's in such a bad mood. I feel bad for her, really, but it's kind of funny._

_She won't let me do anything to help!_

_Still, I can't help but let out a little chuckle._

_Mistake._

_And there goes her legs, much faster than what I expected they could move in this much pain, and there go my legs out from under me._

_I wince as I land on my hip._

"_My hip," I mumble._

"_Take that," she mumbles back, rain still pouring down on us._

_And that's about the time my phone goes off. Tifa's eyes fling wide in shock, as do mine, and we both dive at my belt to try and retrieve the thing. My fingers fight with hers as we pry the thing from its holder._

"_Don't let it get wet!" Tifa tells me, standing over my shoulder as I fumble it out._

_We haven't had any service, so pardon us if we're a little desperate here._

_I place it up against my ear, "Hello? Hello!"_

"_Geez, Cloud, yell why don't ya," Oh God it's Yuffie._

"_Yuffie, listen to me. We're somewhere between–_

"_I've got something to tell you, Cloud, and I feel kind of bad–_

"_Edge and Junon. Fenrir's down for the count, and Tifa's in heels, and we're desperate here–_

"_It wasn't Tifa. It wasn't Denzel, or Marlene. It was Godo–_

"_We need you to send someone–...what did you say?"_

_Yuffie sighs loudly, "The old man is so obsessed with my life, Cloud. It's sickening, really. He's afraid I'm going to run off and marry someone who isn't 'royalty worthy'. So, like, when he was eavesdropping on me, he thought you were proposing to me, in some sick and twisted way. Or like, hinting at the fact you had a ring. But **then** he heard Vincent say something, and he so totally though you were proposing to **Vincent**...which was like uuber scary for me just **imagining **that...I mean...who would wear the dress? And then I thought about you know...us. I mean, I was like, ew, Cloud? Come on pops...really...and then he was like, Vincent and I'm like...omagawd, shut up. I'm not marrying that crazy emo clown–_

"_It's morbid."_

"–_Right, whatever...so like, he's still flipping out, especially when I went out and bought that dress...like, I know how you said you wanted s–_

"_Cloud, who are you talking to?" Tifa asks._

"_Not now, listen," I stop Yuffie in her tracks._

"_What do you mean 'not now'? I've got massive story telling here, man! And I've been trying to call you for like, the past hour."_

"_That's what I'm trying to tell you, Yuffie. We don't have any service, and we're stranded–_

_Ksshshsh!_

_...no...no!_

"_Yuffie! Yuffie are you there?!"_

"_It was Yuffie?! We're never getting any help!" Tifa yells, standing up._

_She tips her head back at the sky, "Forget you, rain! Who needs you! Go away!"_

_Wow...really, really bad mood._

"_Tifa."_

_She growls and shakes a fist up, rain still pouring._

"_I don't think it's working, Tifa."_

"_Thank you, Cloud."_

_Was that sarcasm?_

_She falls to her knees, "We're **doomed**. Someone has it out for us, I swear. I'm not going any farther...I'm waiting here for a car."_

_She's sitting in the middle of the road._

"_Tifa. We've been walking for miles. Not a single car has gone by. We still got a few miles till the next little bit of civilization, if you can even call it that."_

"_I don't care," she sighs, then yelps, "What are you doing?!"_

_I've slung her over my shoulder, where she smacks my back, "Put me down!"_

"_No. I can't leave you like I left Fenrir. I've got to take you. I can't just stick you behind a rock and take the keys out. You aren't that simple."_

_Shit Strife, are you that dense?_

_Whack!_

_Geez, the back of my head!_

_I wince, but don't drop her._

_She sighs, "Your shoulder is in my gut. It isn't comfortable."_

"_Are you going to behave, or do I need to take your keys out?"_

_She growls, and instead of putting her down on her feet, I sling her around my waist, and wait for her to grab my shoulders. She doesn't fight anymore, just slings her arms around my neck, and tightens her legs around my waist._

"_Well, this has just been a barrel of fun. I swear if the wedding is anything like this, I will burn something," Tifa states._

"_Your shoes?"_

"_They're the first victims. Then it'll be that stupid corset."_

_...she's going to wear a corset? Nice._

"_Then I'm burning down Cid."_

_I furrow my brow, "You're burning down Cid?"_

"_And then Yuffie, for not helping us and just running her mouth."_

_Really bad mood._

"_I'm sure it was an honest mistake."_

"_Yeah, right," I feel Tifa huff against my back, "What was she talking about anyways?"_

"_Oh..." _

_Erm, what do I say? I mean...she was talking about you possibly overhearing that I got you an engagement ring? No...I think that's not a good choice._

"_Something about Godo...and her marrying...someone...it was kind of statically."_

_That was...partially true._

_It was Godo...damn! All that worry for nothing! What the heck is up with that? Really?_

_...wait...but that means..._

"_Hmm...Godo...I thought I heard his name. Did she say something about a dress?"_

"_Yeah, she bought one."_

_Right...for you, Tifa._

_...I thought...that maybe she'd heard over the phone...and I'd thought she'd been spurred into telling me she loved me, because of...the ring._

_But since she didn't hear me..._

_She just told me because she was ready to._

_Warm fuzzy feeling in the chest. It's nice._

"_Cloud, hello Cloud."_

"_Huh, what?"_

"_If you get tired, just tell me, okay?" she says into my ear, resting her head on my shoulder._

"_I'm fine. I lug those swords around on my back, you're nothing compared to them."_

_She giggles, sending funny vibrations down my back, "Yeah?"_

"_Yeah," I smile, and I know she's smiling too._

"_Hey, Cloud..."_

"_Hmm?"_

"_...never mind."_

_I frown slightly, "What?"_

"_Nothing. I just thought, I saw something."_

_I glance over my shoulder. "Right, let me know. We don't know what's running around here."_

_...And since my swords are with Fenrir...son of a bitch._

"_...you left your swords with Fenrir, didn't you?"_

_Silence is her answer._

"_It's okay, we'll be alright. We've still got my fists."_

"_Yeah, and your inability to walk in heels, let alone fight in them."_

_That shuts her up._

_And so our little moment ends on that note, and we walk for another half hour. I know she's got this bored look on her face, because I know I've got one on mine._

_And just like that, I feel her head lift up off my shoulder, and we both peer up, a look of elation crossing our faces._

"_It's a truck!" she shouts, and laughs._

_I give a small smile, and feel her release her arms from me to wave._

_And here it comes, the rescue party. Yes...here it comes...here it comes..._

_...aaaannnnddddd there it goes._

_There it goes with a sweet parting gift of even more water flung in our faces._

"_What?! What?! You've got to be kidding me!" Tifa yells, and I know she's shaking her fist at the truck._

"_Can you believe that?! They just left us!" she yells._

_I sigh, "Let's keep moving."_

"_This is the thanks we get, you know for saving the world and everything. We can't even hitch a ride."_

"_It'll be okay, Teef."_

"_Hmm."_

_I continue to march on, and glance up towards some hills. _

"_Hey, a cave is up there."_

"_Where?" Tifa asks, pressing into my back._

_I nod my head in the general direction, "There."_

"_Uh..."_

_Oh yeah, neon-glow vision._

"_Come on, we'll wait there for the rain to let up," I start to march up the hill._

_The cave is **dry**. Amazing. I forgot what dry was like. _

"_Someone's been here before," Tifa points to the remains of a fire as she slips off my back._

_I squeeze my shoulder, "Yeah. Probably in a similar situation."_

"_After getting blew off by a truck."_

"_Precisely."_

_Tifa reaches into one of her pockets, and whips out a lighter. It's dry, amazingly._

"_You have a lighter?"_

"_Always be prepared," she says, kneeling by the left over kindling, "Besides, what would I burn down Cid and Yuffie with?"_

_After about five minutes she's got a fire going, and we shed our outer clothing. We aren't heathens._

_I take off my shirt, and lay it out to dry first off, and kick off my boots. Tifa sheds down to her tank top and kicks off her heels. She takes up my shirt once it's relatively dry, and takes off her pants._

_This is almost as good as Tifa in a corset._

_She's standing near the entrance to the cave, squeezing her hair out, my shirt just barely covering her hips._

_Drool._

_I like appreciating my girlfriend. NO! I am not an animal! I am a man._

_She walks back over, and sits beside of me, "I think we're going to be here for a while."_

"_Yeah."_

_She smiles at me, "Though, it's not that bad."_

"_What're you talking about? You've got blisters on your feet, and my backside got scraped to pieces by my own bike."_

"_Yeah...but, lately, we've been busy...you know? No time, none at all," she sighs, relaxing up against the cave wall._

"_Yeah."_

_Oh...**oh.**_

_She's thinking like me._

_She's an animal too._

_Okay, well, maybe hot intertwining passion isn't her words, but I bet it's close._

_So I lean over, and kiss her just where her jaw meets her ear, "I love you, you know?"_

_She giggles, "I know. I love you too," and she's blushing still when she says it._

_I haven't told Barret or Vincent yet, that we've exchanged our love for each other. This is our thing, and I'll tell them eventually...but not yet. This is still for us. And it's nice, you know? Getting the freedom to tell her I love her whenever I want._

_It's still amazingly cute to see her blush when she says it._

_So, I lean down, and she leans back, and is pressed to the floor. And I kiss her, trails of kisses, across her eyelids, and down her nose, to her lips, and she giggles and sighs, and she was right, it isn't that bad...not now._

"_W-wait..." she pushes back on my chest, and struggles to sit up beneath me._

"_What?" I ask, did I do something wrong?_

"_There's...there's a rock in...in my back-ahh...there we go," she yanks a sizeable rock from beneath her and tosses it to the side._

_Her arms wrap back around my neck, but I glance around._

_What do you know...caves have rocks...and lots of them apparently._

"_This isn't going to work, is it?" she asks, apprehensively._

_Instead of responding, I yank her from beneath me, and she gives a squeal that echos down the cave. I settle down against the dusty, rocky floor, removing any particularly painful rocks, before pulling her down on my chest, and I mean literally on my chest._

_She lays on her side, wrapping her arms around my neck, and her feet curl up to touch my knees._

"_You're...not uncomfortable?"_

"_I'm fine...trust me, this is fine."_

_She smiles, and kisses me, before burying her face just below my ear._

_Who am I kidding? We're both exhausted...and there's rocks on the floor...but this is more than I've gotten in a long time...and I'm happy...despite the fact Fenrir betrayed me, and I had to leave him behind; despite the fact Tifa's got blisters on her feet, and I've got scrapes and bruises all over my back; despite the fact I was soaked to the bone, and Yuffie has a five second attention span; despite the fact we got blew off by a truck, and there are rocks on the floor; despite all this, I'm happy. It's just me and her, even if it isn't hot and intertwining._

_It's enough._

_For now._

_And no, I did not pull her farther up, and accidentally upset the shirt on her hip area...and no, I did not get a good view before I fell asleep._

_It's true...ahem...right._

**A/N: **Because inspiration hit me, and I did just update that fast. AND IT WAS GODO! bet you didn't see that coming, did you? mystery solved...I love Yuffie's speech. None of you thought it could've been Yuffie's phone...after all, she does only have one cell phone, and Wutai is apparently connected...that or Godo is bugging his daughter's phone...excuse me...phones. Thanks for reviews!


	40. It's A Skilt

_It's A Skilt_

_"Ohmagawd...this angle...this is the one."_

_"Why–...for the sake of your future health, I advise against it."_

_"But **why**?"_

_...Voices...there are voices._

_"Do you really need to even ask that question?"_

_"But, I can like...so totally get him flat out groping her butt from this angle!"_

_...who is groping what butt here?..._

_...wait a second..._

_"Ohmagawd! He just squeezed his hand!"_

_My eyes fling open. _

_And I yell._

_"Vincent!"_

_"Cloud, I advise you remove your hand before Tifa wakes up and finds you both in this compromising position while Yuffie is in possession of a camera."_

_What?!_

_I look over Tifa's head, and see Yuffie standing there, camera aimed. _

_"Don't...even think about it."_

_She jumps, and hides the camera quickly behind her back, and smiles._

_I sit up slowly, Tifa mumbles incoherently and snuggles up against my chest, her arms still wrapped around my neck._

_"Did ya sleep well, sunshine?" Yuffie coos._

_I glare._

_"Yuffie, I don't believe now would be the best time to mock, tease, and or annoy them. So be quiet."_

_Yuffie scowls at Vincent's interruption._

_I sigh, "What time is it?"_

_"Eleven O' five," Vincent replies._

_I groan, and stretch what little I can with Tifa hanging off of me. My back cracks several times._

_"How did you find us?"_

_"With my great genius, of course!" Yuffie grins._

_"No, seriously. How?"_

_Yuffie scoffs, "I'm serious! I was listening...it just took a while to process what you were saying."_

_"Either way, you're here now. Fenrir is-_

_"Already got him," Yuffie chirps, "Vincent's been fixing it up for you."_

_I glance up at Vincent, "Thanks."_

_"You won't thank me in a minute."_

_I narrow my eyes, "Why? Did someone mess Fenrir up?"_

_Vincent studies me for a moment, "No. It has nothing to do with Fenrir."_

_"Then what is it?"_

_Yuffie snorts, and laughs out loud, and Vincent's eye twitches._

_"What?" I ask, "What is it?"_

_"Just...wait, Cloud. I'll...tell you later," Vincent struggles._

_I frown, this can't bode well._

_"Alright," I stand, slipping an arm beneath Tifa's knees, and face Vincent._

_"Come on, the truck's waiting," Yuffie says, leading the way out of the cave._

_I glare at Vincent, "That was the worst way to be woke up, you know?"_

_He stares back at me, "Just be glad Yuffie didn't get a picture in."_

_It only takes us about an hour to get back to Edge, and by that time Vincent has pretty much fixed Fenrir on the WRO truck they borrowed. I know plenty about bikes, but I wasn't aware Vincent did. Still, I can't help him, because Tifa still hasn't woken up, and she sat in my lap the entire way home._

_I carry her inside, and lay her down on the couch, followed by Yuffie and Vincent. After I cover her up, I turn to find Yuffie looking incredibly pleased, and Vincent incredibly displeased._

_"Is...this about what you were going to show me?"_

_Vincent doesn't say anything, and Yuffie merely replies by giggling and holding out a package._

_"You..." she pauses to laugh again, "You know how none of actually got to try on our stuff for Cid's wedding? Well, here it is. He decided to deliver yours, first."_

_I eye the package skeptically. It looks harmless enough, a normal, standard package. And I'm a delivery boy, I know packages. And this, just looks the right size for a tux. Might need steaming or something like that, but, I don't see why I should be apprehensive._

_I take the package from her, and I see **pity** in Vincent's eyes._

_"Just so you know, even though you got yours first...we all suffer. That means myself, Barret, Reeve, and you. It isn't just to mock you. I swear," Vincent closes his eyes as I tear the paper off the box._

_"It can't be that bad, right? Isn't suppose to be the bridesmaid dresses that are ugly?" I ask, tearing the tape on the box._

_"Hey!" Yuffie shouts, "My dress is very pretty."_

_"You haven't even seen it."_

_"Shut up, Vincent...and open your eyes, you know you want to see this," Yuffie laughs, pulling out her camera._

_"Is this necessary?" I ask._

_"Just open the box already!" Yuffie yells._

_"You don't know Cid's heritage, do you, Cloud?" Vincent asks._

_"Please, guys, it's just a tux–_

_There's a click, and a bright flash as I stare down at the terror before my very eyes. No...no this can't be. This **can not** be happening. It's a joke, right?_

_My mouth is hanging wide open, and I lift my wide eyes to Vincent and Yuffie, as she snaps another picture._

_"This..." I clear my throat, "This is some joke, right?"_

_Vincent groans people...he does, I swear, and he closes his eyes again in agony, and looks away._

_"Nope!" Yuffie replies cheerfully, "It's the truth. Even Cid's wearing one, but he's proud...cause ya know, it's his heritage and everything. Tradition, and what not."_

_"What kind of tradition is this?" I can't help but notice the high pitch to my voice._

_"Come on Cloud, you have to try it on...make sure it fits," Yuffie taunts._

_The box falls to the floor as I pull 'it' out. I stare in horror. This can't...be happening._

_"It's...it's..." I hold it out away from me, pinching it between my fingers._

_I feel my mouth curl up into a sneer, "It's a skirt."_

_Yuffie frowns, "It's a kilt. Don't dare call it anything else in front of Cid. Vincent's got the scar to prove it."_

_"It's a skirt."_

_Yuffie sighs, "It's a **kilt**."_

_"Skirt."_

_"Kilt!"_

_"Whatever it is, or whatever you call it...I'm not wearing it," I state firmly._

_"Yes, you are...or you can't be in the wedding. Cid's words...well, I left out a few choice words, but you catch the drift," Yuffie states, nonchalant._

_"There will be pictures," I state._

_"Yep!" she grins._

_"No. There won't."_

_"But Kuh-loud! You're in the wedding party! And what will Tifa say, if you don't go?"_

_I feel my lips press together tightly._

_Yuffie grins in triumph, "I knew that'd get him. See, nothing to worry about Vince!"_

_"Now you just have to convince Barret...and myself," Vincent still hasn't opened his eyes._

_"Tah, you know you want to Vinnie."_

_"Call me that again, and I will make sure Wutai has no heiress."_

_"You're no fun," Yuffie sticks her tongue out before turning her attention back to me, "So?"_

_"So what? I...I..." I' m at a loss for words here, people._

_It's a skirt._

_"If I hear one crack about this," I gesture to the skirt, "I'm not wearing it. Understood? Nothing about the past, present, or future when it comes to me wearing anything that could be mistaken for female clothing. Do I make myself clear?"_

_Yuffie nods her head seriously, "Crystal."_

_"Good. Until then, I'll consider it," I nod my head, and study the skirt again._

_Excuse me, kilt._

_"Oh my God."_

_I turn to see Tifa, still in my shirt, her hands flung up over her mouth, eyes wide._

_"...um..."_

_She turns her attention to Yuffie, "You already told him?!"_

_What?!_

_"You **knew** about this?!" I ask._

_She jumps, and blushes deeply, "I-I...um–_

_"And you...weren't going to tell me?" I ask._

_"No! It's not that...it's just, we **agreed**," Tifa glares at Yuffie, "That I would tell you...you know, soften the blow."_

_I grip the skirt, ahem, kilt, in my hand and dangle it in front of her face, "How could you of possibly softened the blow? Please, do tell."_

_She gasps, and narrows her eyes, "I don't **know**, but it would've had to been better than the way Yuffie told you."_

_"Oh, really?"_

_"Yes, really."_

_"And how long did you know I was going to wear a skirt?"_

_"It's a **kilt**," Tifa spats the word, "And I've known for three weeks."_

_"Th-three weeks?! You've known for three weeks and didn't even try to tell me? And you said you were going to soften the blow?"_

_She crosses her arms, and pouts, "I still hadn't figured out how I was going to yet. But! I would have!"_

_"Yeah...right."_

_It's about at this point and time I notice Yuffie lean over to Vincent, who has opened his eyes by now but is avoiding looking at the ski-kilt._

_"Lovers spat," I hear her barely whisper, but apparently it's enough to send Tifa over the edge._

_"Out! Out! Get out of my house right now!" Tifa yells, and points at the door._

_"B-but Tifa!" Yuffie protests._

_Vincent's already leaving. I swear, it's just to get out of the vicinity of the s-kilt._

_"No! I spent my entire night yesterday in the rain marching in heels! I'll be damned if I spend this day with two kilt-fearing men and a klepto-ninja! OUT!"_

_Yuffie doesn't protest, she runs quickly after Vincent, pausing at the door._

_However, this goes unnoticed by Tifa._

_"And you!" she turns her attention n me, "You **are** going to wear this thing. I don't care what type of therapy you have to go through before or afterwards, I will **force **this thing on, do you understand?"_

_...oh fear. Which is scarier? Wearing a s-kilt...or facing Tifa's wrath?_

_...hmmm..._

_I nod my head sheepishly, "Yes ma'am."_

_"Good," she forces out, trying to smile._

_Apparently she still isn't in the best of moods. Her feet are red, and look raw._

_"Now, I'm going to go do something for my feet, I suggest you do something for your back, and," she jerks the kilt out of my hand, "I'm taking this with me...in case you get any ideas. Yes, I **do** know what you did with those boxers. Those were my favorite pair too."_

_...they were?_

_Dammit!_

_Wait, she has a favorite pair of my boxers? Well, she does do my laundry._

_Tifa walks away, and that's when I hear a snigger. I turn towards the door quickly. Apparently Yuffie stuck around for that little fiasco._

_"Boy, are you whipped!"_

_"I will slaughter you."_

_She laughs again, "Oh, and Vince lied...I did get a picture."_

_She's halfway down the street hanging out the window of the truck by the time I get the door open. It was jammed with a couple kunai._

_"Bye Cloud! Oh! And Tifa will be getting a special package in the mail in three days! Good luck!" she shouts, waving._

_Oh great...just great. I asked Yuffie to bring me a dress for Tifa, and she comes back with a skirt for me._

_I can't wait to see what she picked out for Tifa._

_Not._

_**A/N: **For some reason, I find that Cid could possilby be Scottish...or would find it highly entertaining to see any of the FFVII boys in a kilt, and this was the perfect excuse. Could you imagine Sephy in one?! And no, I don't know what heritage in Gaia would be equal to Scottish in our world. But I do think kilts are rather sexy, at least in my opinion they are. I've been cheerful lately, so that's why I've been updating this story so much, and neglecting the others. Ahh, well, you can just wait. It won't be much longer, I swear! **Vin! **did ya not see I stole your word 'snarky'? i like to give little tributes to me reviewers...and for some reason that word popped into my head last chappie. **Andalite!** You can't be serious! You don't really hate me, do you? XP **onewingedangel** omagosh, I about died when I read 'I vote cave sex'...seriously, that made my day. Sorry, no cave sex though. **Sabith! **dude, blown blew...what's the difference? no, seriously, I couldn't think...I was like blowwed off...wait, that's not right...blew! then you said that, and I was like...der. I'm an idiot sometimes, I swear. And yes! Cloud is a cheeky bastard! **ChibiTeef:** Yes! you got the 500th review! Enjoy a cookie._

_**Thanks for all the reviews! 502 in 39 chapters! **What will you do for me this chapter? XP Later loves!_


	41. Stud Muffin

_Stud Muffin_

_Erg...the exhaustion. Who'd of thought driving would take this much out of you? At least Fenrir is behaving..._

_...for the moment._

_So, currently I'm heading in from a delivery job. My date with Tifa is tonight. I've got it all planned out...romantical and what not...all that mushy stuff._

_Yes Shera did help me._

_I am not that feminine...honestly, just cause you wear a dress once people start asking you for advice on interior decorating and shoving kilts in your face._

_...I can't help it if I have a good eye for wall paint and sofa fabric!_

_...yeah..._

_Ahem, anyways...so like I was saying...romantic dinner...surprise..._

_Yeah._

_I called in, and Marlene answered. Tifa's gone to the grocery store, and I know she'll be gone for about two hours. I timed this down perfectly. I've just got to get in, and get out._

_And if push comes to shove, I'll just have Marlene call Tifa on her cell to stall her...pick up more things, you know...that sort of thing._

_So I pull up to the bar, dismount quickly and head inside. _

_I pause just a step inside the door._

_It's quiet...**too** quiet..._

"_...Marlene?" I ask apprehensive, letting the door swing shut behind me._

"_Denzel?" I move towards the steps slowly, eying each corner._

_I feel like I'm being watched. I swallow, and shrug. Maybe they went out to play. If they did, there should be a note on the counter._

_I move towards the kitchen, and that's when it happens._

"_Flying ninja kamikaze stank bomb of **doom**!"_

"_Augh!"_

_I go down...was that...a cloud (heh, cloud) of green? And Denzel? Was he...wearing a gas mask? Where the hell did he get a–_

_...oh my God._

"_Oh! Oh man," I roll over onto my side on the floor, clamping my hands over my mouth._

_I lay there writhing for a moment. Shallow breaths, breathe through the mouth. Don't even think about inhaling through the nostrils._

_I gasp, the cloud has disipated, but the stench remains._

_...what **is **that?! It's horrible!_

_...wait...is there...something wet on...my arm?_

_Oh hell no, I know they did not. _

_I stand quickly, jerking my head around, my forearm pressed against my nose. I stumble, the stench making my eyes water and my vision blurry. I reach out, touching a wall, and recognize it as the doorway to the living room._

"_D-cough-Denzel!" _

_What the hell is this?!_

_Wait a second...I think I heard ninja in that war cry..._

_I'm going to kill Yuffie._

_DAMMIT!_

_I retreat to the upstairs, the stench following me...or is it me? It better not be me!_

"_Hi, Cloud!" it's Marlene, voice chipper as usual, but slightly muffled behind Wutai-styled gas mask._

_Oh you got to be fuc–_

"_Heh, home early, Cloud?" Denzel asks, appearing beside of her, in a matching mask._

–_king kidding me._

"_Woo, boy...do you smell, Cloud."_

"_...It's on me?"_

_Denzel bursts out into a fit of giggles, Marlene replying, "Is it on him, he asks? Is it on him?!"_

_...damn._

_I sigh, heavily, "Marlene..." my voice sounds strange through pinched nostrils, "How do I get it off? Burn the clothes? Is that the joke?"_

_Denzel is on the floor now, Marlene bent in the middle, tears watering up behind her mask, "...b-b-burn the clothes? Oh she was right!"_

"_How do you get it off, Marlene?" My patience is running thin here._

"_Y-you don't!" she cries, before joining Denzel on the floor._

"_...it better wear off then," I reply._

_That only spurs more laughter._

_...only one thing will get them to help me now, "I have a date with Tifa tonight."_

_Marlene freezes, and even though she's wearing a mask, I can see her pale behind it. She elbows Denzel in the side when he doesn't stop laughing._

"_Ouch! Hey, what was that for?" he glances at her._

"_It's a very...important...**date**." _

_Marlene swallows, "Uh oh."_

"_...oh boy," Denzel says, before jumping up._

"_Alright! We've got a code blue-forty two! Denzel! Get the tomato juice! I'll grab the car air fresheners. Put him the decontamination room! I'm calling in backup!" Marlene shouts._

_Denzel stands, saluting once, before they both rush off in opposite directions._

_...what the hell just happened here?! Blue-forty two? Tomato juice?! Backup!_

_Eep._

_And then Denzel's back, grabbing my hand, a bottle in one hand, and yanking me into the 'decontamination room', better known as the hall bathroom._

_He places me on the toilet. I think I'd normally be fighting this, or demanding an answer, but the smell has affected my brain stem, and I'm just so bloody confused._

_And then there's Marlene, rushing in with a package, phone up to her ear._

"_Yeah it's an emergency! Listen, I don't care what she's doing! I need to talk to her now!" Marlene shouts into the phone._

_Denzel...Denzel?!_

"_Denzel?! What are you doing?!" _

"_You were right, we need to burn the evidence...give me your shirt."_

_I eye him skeptically, before unzipping my shirt and pulling it off to hold it out to him. He reaches over to the counter where I'm assuming a line of 'decontamination tools' has been laid out, and picks up a pair of...are those the tongs I use to barbecue?_

"_Denz–_

_Too late. He's already grabbed the shirt with them, and shoved them into a plastic ziplock bag. He seals it before tossing it off to a frazzled Marlene, who then shoves the bag in a black trash bag._

"_It didn't get on your–_

"_No...it didn't get on my pants."_

_Not happening._

"_You've got an important date, Cloud."_

"_I'm aware, Denzel. Thank–_

"_Thank goodness! I told them it was important! I mean, how many people have your personal room number, honestly?" Marlene spits into the phone, "I know, I know...listen, we have a code blue-forty-two–_

_There's a shrill squawking sound of a voice on the other end._

_I shudder...it's **her**. And she understands the code speak! Hell, she probably was the one that designed the system._

"_Yes! We didn't know!...well, we've already got the bar prepped for destinkification, since you know how Tifa would react."_

_Destinkifi-what?! Is that even a word?_

_Marlene pushes on, "Yeah, we've got them...uh huh...right, right...what'd we use? Oh...well, two months worth of Denzel's sock sweat–_

_Fight the urge, Cloud...remember your last puking escapade?_

"–_six rotten eggs...moldy bread, you know, for sustinance; seven rotten banana peels, three deteriorated apples and oranges. We've got garlic, ten cans of–_

_I clamp my hands over my ears, and Denzel giggles. I give him a silencing look, and see Marlene's gone quiet, taking to nodding her head quickly. I move my hands back slightly._

"_Right right, standard super-ninja-stank bomb material...how'd we mix it? The blender."_

_Mental note: never use blender again._

_Ever._

"_Denzel?"_

_He looks up at me, "Yeah, Cloud?"_

"_Throw the blender in the trash bag with my shirt."_

_He gives me a puzzled look, before reaching over and grabbing the bottle of tomato juice._

"_What are you–_

_Squirt!_

"_Ah!"_

_Come **on**! You've got to be friggen kidding me here! This cannot be happening!_

"_Okay, thanks Yuffie. Will do," Marlene clicks off the phone._

_She reaches out to grab the bag of air fresheners, and rips it open with her teeth. She pulls out three tree shaped cardboard air fresheners, green with the word 'Minty fresh' printed across it._

"_No."_

_Too late...again. She's hung them on my ears, and slipped the other one around my wrist like a bracelet._

_No...no more! Please, why?! Someone save me! The one day...the one day!_

_The phone rings, and Marlene checks the ID. Her face goes pale._

"_It's Tifa," she whispers._

"_Answer it," I hiss._

_She nods her head once, "Hey! Tifa!"_

_There's a muffled reply from the other end._

"_T-the grocery store's closed?"_

_Son of a bitch._

"_Freak accident on the vegetable/fruit isle you say? Oh, some kids rigged a watermelon to explode...wow, kids these days."_

_Oh don't even try to play that one off, young lady. Wait till your father hears about this one._

_Wait...he'll probably laugh his ass off._

_Dammit!_

"_Well...I need...I need..." Marlene's looking for stalling, at least she's that smart, "...I need air fresheners! You know, Denzel's socks stink up our room...yeah? You'll stop by a convienent store? Oh...you're a life saver Tifa, thanks," she clicks off the phone, "We've got thirty minutes, tops!" _

_Denzel nods intently, "Look away Marlene." _

_She nods her head once, before turning swiftly, "I'm going to fix the downstairs now!"_

_...look away? Why?_

_Ouch! Damn! Who knew Denzel had an arm? Damn!_

_And I'm face down in the tub, Denzel standing over me, reaching out for the knobs. I'm miserable, covered in tomato juice, and air fresheners hanging off my ears._

"_What are– Gah!"_

_Scalding water to the skin! Ah!_

_I rear back, and bang my head on the faucet._

_I hiss, and rub the back of my head, and I hear Denzel wince in the background, but he's already moving on to the next object._

_Is that...? It is! It's Tifa's sweet pea body wash! No, Denzel! No! Don't do it!_

_...shit._

"_You owe me big for this one, Denzel," I say, feeling the glob land in my hair._

"_I'm sorry?"_

"_You're sorry and you still owe me big."_

_Ten minutes later, after a fresh, scalding shower, Marlene is standing on my desk chair in my room fixing my jacket._

"_See? A sports jacket is much better for this occasion...if you'd of worn a tie, like you originally planned, it'd seem to formal. This is a date, you're suppose to look good, and dress nice, but you got to be relaxed," she says wisely._

_I nod my head listening._

"_And black and blue, it looks good on you. You should wear this more often," Marlene states._

"_Yeah, if I ever go on a date again after this," I reply._

"_Hey! I told you, the stench is gone. All evidence gone. Denzel's already disposed of the trash in the dumpster two streets down. We're good."_

"_Even the blender?"_

"_Yes, the blender. You can explain that one to Tifa, though."_

"_Done," I reply as she steps off the stool._

"_See, you look good," Marlene states, as I turn to look in the mirror._

"_Not bad, but I better not smell funny anymore."_

"_The stench is gone, Cloud."_

"_Is the sweet pea?"_

_She giggles before replying, "Your manly cologne should cover it."_

"_By the way Marlene," I ask, pulling on the cuffs of my sleeves, "What'd you put in that soap Denzel brought me? It did work...good."_

_Marlene's eyes go wide before she calmly replies, "You don't want to know."_

_I glance at her dubiously, "It can't be worse–_

"_It can, Cloud. It can," and with that she walks away._

_I'm hidden out back when Tifa gets in, pushing Fenrir away from the bar so it doesn't alert her. I've made all my calls, and everything else should run smoothly tonight...as long as I don't get attacked by another flying ninja kamikaze stank bomb of doom._

_Or however the hell it went._

_As I'm pushing Fenrir away, I hear Tifa talking to the children through the cracked kitchen window. I pause for a moment, listening to her laugh with the children._

"_I got a package today? And a letter? Let me see," Tifa says._

_There's a rustle, and a pause before she says something else._

"_.Wait..is that...is that, mint and tomato I smell? You really were desperate for air fresheners, weren't you Marlene?"_

**A/N:** I don't know where this came from...actually, I do. I just had this mental image of Cloud sitting on a toilet, with air freshners hanging from his ears...next chapter: THE DATE! OH lord you guys don't know what I've got planned...oh, I was just reading over it...and I was like...God, Cloud really is Gaia's bitch. You just wait, people. Just wait. Who would've thought we've hit chapter 41 and he STILL hasn't proposed. Gosh, Cloud, you're such a slacker. XP. Anyways, just prepare...for the future brings changes, happiness, embarrassment (obviously but not just Cloud), and much, much more. **Calistar! **Sailor Moon rocks! Don't let Haruki tell you otherwise! XP **Ghostly **you made my day with that, seriously...it was _wonderful_...that is awesome. I've got to run, I'll reply next chappie, promise! I LOVE YOU ALL! WITH LIKE MASSIVE HUGS! peace loves XD!


	42. The Way We Are

**A/N: EPIC! **I said I was going to post this on the 19th. (It might not be the 19th where YOU are, but it is here! approximately 10 minutes in to the 19th XP) GUESS WHAT?! It's like, our...7 month? anniversary since this story started! I know I say this alot, but I honestly can't thank you guys enough. Seriously, you guys make it worth writing. No lie. And I'm trying to give back this chappie, but! Before I do, I'd like to point out that I got 4 reviews for chapter one in the month of august, I now have 14, and now we currently stand at 556 reviews at 42 chapters. That's unbeliveable, and you guys deserve massive brownie points. It rains brownies on you. Open your mouth, enjoy the chocolatity goodness...but you know what would be even more awesome possum? If we could hit 600 with this chapter alone. But, no pressure you guys. I'm just glad you like it! XP Enjoy!

_The Way We Are_

_Twitch...twitch...twitch..._

_Stupid eye._

_I glance at my watch again...7:02...it said that last time I looked at it! They're late! What happened?! Why aren't they here? Why?!_

_Twitch._

_Cool it man, keep it cool, Strife._

_Twitch._

_What if my watch is broken? What if it's really eight o'clock? What if my plan didn't work? What if–_

_...oh, the clock on the wall says 7:00...maybe I'm just...a little paranoid here._

_The waiter is eyeing me skeptically. _

_No cakes. I told him we'd have ice cream for dessert._

_...if she ever shows up._

_...twitch._

_Erg! Damn!_

_I'm resisting the urge to slap myself up the side of the head, like seriously. My hand is all clenched up on the table, and I'm just waiting for my eye to twitch so I can punch myself._

_...come on you stupid eye, I **dare** you._

_Twitch._

"_Mr. Strife."_

_I glance up; do not interrupt my war with my eye...bitch._

_It's the waiter._

_I'm not fond of waiters._

"_Yes?"_

"_She's arrived."_

_Twitch._

_Okay, I didn't punch myself that time, and I can't now, cause I got to look good for Tifa. I glance around the room. It's a nice restaurant, with candles on the table, and this peach-pink table-cloth. There's a tiny vase of white roses sitting on the table, and the chairs are cushioned with pink pillows._

_The walls are heavily draped and curtained; there's no one in here. I've got the place rented out for the night, so we should be good._

_And it was quite a bit, I must say...but it's worth it, for her._

_I glance towards the doorway, fiddling with my cloth napkin before looking up._

_I gasp, and drop the napkin...it's a good thing I didn't go for that sip of water instead._

_...There's no way in hell that's sexy conservative. No way, at all. Yuffie lied._

_She's looking around the room, amazed, her eyes still not landing on me yet. For someone who claimed that Tifa's eyes were brown, Yuffie did a great job picking out a matching color for her._

_Course, color is the last thing on my mind._

_The dress is like a halter-top, and the skirt flows out to her knees in...I guess...it would be like levels, of curvy fabric that sway and swing at each little tip of Tifa's hips._

_...wow._

_Her hair's done up halfway, some of it pulled back with a red, rose clip, and her hair is curled falling down her back, and framing her face. She's wearing these dangerous looking heels that match the dress, and I hope her feet have healed._

_She's wearing her pearls I gave her, too._

_And that's when I look up and realize she's staring at me with this little faint smile lighting her lips, and she blinks rapidly when I meet her eyes, gives a tiny little laugh._

_She moves delicately down the steps, and I stand as she moves across the floor. She giggles again, spinning around once, the skirt of the dress fanning out like a flower._

"_What do you think?" she asks, her hair slipping over her shoulders._

_I think I'm gawking because she's blushing now, averting her eyes, tucking stray strands of hair behind her ears. Her nails are done, too. Red, and curved delicately._

_...I think the waiter just snorted at my stupidity._

"_Perfect," I finally answer, and she beams as I walk over and place a delicate kiss on her cheek._

_She giggles again lightly as I pull out her chair for her and seat her, before seating myself. Alright, gentlemanly behavior...brownie points. _

_Tifa lifts up the menu carefully, flipping it open, "I thought it was strange when I received an anonymous letter telling me to get in the limo that would arrive at 6:30 pm sharp."_

_I blush, damn...that's right, now I owe Reeve a favor._

_...and Yuffie for getting the dress...Barret for taking the kids...Shera for giving me tips...and Vincent for getting the reservations._

_Yes, Vincent. Apparently he was quite the chef in his Turk days. His name is still well known around the kitchen._

_...Vincent...the chef...heh._

"_It was, though, even stranger when I opened the package to find a brand new dress, and shoes. Needless to say, I was quite flattered, and couldn't pass up the opportunity."_

_I blink, "And what if it hadn't been me?"_

_She sighed, eyes skimming the menu quickly, "I guess I just would've had to sit through an awkward dinner."_

_I think my jaw just hit the floor, "You–_

"_I mean, I would have to call a taxi and everything if I'd have declined, and I'm sure the gentleman would've given me a ride home–_

"_What if he was a stranger–_

"_Not to mention the fact I'd get a free meal out of it, maybe even a phone number," her face hidden behind the menu now._

_I clamp my mouth shut, narrowing my eyes, "Well, I guess that's a good thing then. I'm only here to give you away to him."_

_Her menu smacks the table and she looks at me with open shock. At seeing my face, she regains her cool composure, and takes a sip of her drink._

"_Well, I'm glad I have your permission."_

"_Of course," I reply._

"_Anything else I need to know?"_

"_Anything I need to know?"_

_The corner of her mouth perks slightly, her eyebrows raising at the challenge, "Well, I guess it's a good thing. You **were** getting kind of boring."_

"_B-boring?"_

"_Mm hmm," she motions to the waiter that she's ready._

"_How can you call me boring, really?"_

_Tifa shrugged, "I'd like the shrimp Alfredo, please."_

_The waiter took the menu, "And for you sir?"_

"_Chicken Parmesan."_

_The waiter takes the menus, retreating to the kitchen._

"_I can't believe you did that," I state._

"_What?" she asks, incredulously._

"_Trying to mess with my head. I see how it is. I go through all this trouble for this, and you don't even have a **clue**–_

"_Does it have something to do with air-fresheners, tomato sauce, and my blender?"_

_My jaw drops, really this time, "How?"_

_She smirks, "I found their gas masks, and they confessed after I threatened to call Yuffie and tell her that they had sold her stink bomb recipe to local reporters."_

"_Clever."_

_She lifts one shoulder lightly, "I try."_

"_Good to know you're putting in the effort."_

_She smirked again._

_And so the dinner went like this, with the two of us having light conversation about the children, our friends, and of course, our jobs._

_It was strange, really, I couldn't remember the last time we'd sat like this, and just talked. No children, no pests (other known as Yuffie and Cid), no friends, just us..._

_And that annoying waiter._

_Bitch._

_I'm trying to remember how I got this lucky. I mean, how did a guy like me end up with a girl like her? Why does she put up with me? _

_She's talking about something that Denzel did, a little giggle hitting her voice, her eyes glancing around the room; she takes a sip of her drink._

_**Because she loves you**, a voice echoes in my head. And it's my voice, but it isn't at the same time._

_It's strange, because I've known for a while that she's loved me, but just looking at her right now...it's so surreal, it's not even possible, but it's true._

_And I'm listening to what she's saying, but I also know on the other level that I'm completely zoning out. I can't help it, I just can't help but stare at her. She's beautiful. She's the woman I love. She's the woman I want to live with, to have and, well, to marry._

_I want to live with her, and I want to die with her._

_The waiter breaks the perfect picture before me, taking away our empty plates. That's when the peace shatters._

"–_cake."_

_I blink wide, "What'd you say?" I ask quickly._

_She blinks a couple times, startled, "I'm ordering Cheese cake."_

_...oh..._

"_Oh."_

_...cake._

_Fear._

_She gives me a funny smile, "Don't tell me–_

"_No, I'm not worried, nor am I afraid."_

_She laughs right out, her earrings swinging as she shakes her head, "You are," amusement laces her voice._

"_I'm not."_

"_Sure, Cloud."_

_I press my lips together, "No. I'm not."_

_She laughs again as the waiter returns with the cake, laying a plate out before both of us. Tifa takes a bite before looking at me incredulously, "You're not, huh?"_

_Sure, it landed safely, but what if I put my fork in it and it explodes?_

_I lift my fork slowly, cutting into it, and take a bite._

_Hmm, not bad._

"_See, you can do it, you big baby," she teases me._

"_I'm sorry, what? Did you say something about panties flying across the room?"_

_Her face flushes, "Cloud!" she tosses her napkin across at me, and I catch it easily._

"_Temper, temper, we're in a public place."_

_That doesn't keep her, however, from sticking her tongue out at me._

"_Mr. Strife," the waiter interrupts._

_Erg, what bitch?_

"_Yes?"_

"_Would you...?"_

_Oh, right._

_I nod my head once, confusion lacing Tifa's eyes. The waiter, however has moved away towards the wall._

"_Cloud...?"_

_The lights go out, and Tifa gives a little yelp of surprise. She's looking around wildly in the dim light the candles offer._

_I stand, holding out my hand, "Come on."_

_She eyes me warily, before taking my hand and standing slowly. That's when the curtains slide away from the far wall, catching Tifa's attention, she turns quickly and walks away; I follow much slower, hands in my pocket._

_She gasps as the curtains stop, swinging slowly in the moonlight. The wall, and ceiling were completely made of glass, giving a surreal view of the desert twilight, orange haze dabbling the horizon, stars twinkling in the inky darkness opposite._

_She moves quickly towards the wall, finding the door, and I follow once again, a few steps behind her. She pushes out the door, gasping against the cool air of the desert night, twisting around on the concrete balcony, eyes to the sky._

_Even though Edge isn't anywhere near as big as Midgar, the lights at night dim the stars; but here, on this cliff side, on this balcony, it's perfect. And I can see it in her eyes, the stars and the moon as the sun's waves finally disappear, plunging the desert into darkness._

_She finally finds the railing, leaning over it slightly, propping her head up on her elbows, head tipped backwards, "I didn't realize how high up we were..." she breathes._

_I move to stand behind her, hands still in my pocket, head tipped up as well. I'm afraid if I take them out, it'll show how nervous I am._

_Theoretically this would be the absolute perfect time for me to ask her, but I'm wondering, if we could just stay like this a little longer. Do we need that title right now? Married, engaged, dating, friends; do we really need a label? Can't we be all of those? The only thing that matters, is that we love each other, right?_

_I'm shook from my thoughts as her head bumps into my chest, her arms wrapping firmly around my waist. I blink, surprised._

"_Don't ever leave me, okay? You're perfect like this...you're all I need...so don't ever leave me," she whispers into my chest._

_I feel my hands free themselves from my pocket, my arms wrapping around her tightly, "I won't, as long as you don't leave me."_

_

* * *

_

_We stumbled into the house around midnight; the house was dark and quiet, and not reeking of stink bomb potential._

"_Where are the kids?" Tifa whispered softly, laying her purse on the counter._

"_Barret's watching them for the night."_

_Tifa eyed me wide, "Barret knew about this?"_

"_Yep; so did Yuffie, Vincent, Reeve, Cid and Shera."_

_She puts her hands on her hips, "And somehow I didn't find this out?"_

_I shrug lightly, "Somehow."_

_She narrowed her eyes, "The children didn't know."_

_I lift my hands up, defeated, "The children didn't know...until they smacked me with stank."_

_She giggled._

"_Consider it payback for the kilt," I say._

_She raises an eyebrow, "This is payback? Well, if that's the case, I guess I should just go out and buy you a whole new wardrobe."_

_I hang my mouth open, "I mean as in the secret part–_

"_We could share clothes! Though," she puts a finger to her cheek, "I'm not sure how you would look in red, though. I just don't think it's your color."_

"_That isn't what I meant–_

"_Oh, and we could have the cutest shoes! Just share a closet, you know. I'm sure there's plenty of chocobo dresses and what not to match your–hey!"_

_This seems...slightly familiar, Tifa draped over one shoulder in heels, her fist pounding on my back._

"_Put me down you oaf!"_

"_No."_

"_Cloud!" _

_I poke her waist and she squeals, thrashing her legs around._

_She gasps between laughs, "Cloud...don't...don't do tha-a-a-t! Cloud! Stop it!" she slaps my back as she scolds me._

_She's ticklish...it's a nice bit to know._

_I spin around in a circle, much to her protests, and one of her shoes flies off. She screams again as I spin once more, and my heel catches on the floorboard, and we fall backwards._

_I gasp when we hit the floor, Tifa's elbow driving into my stomach. She's laughing hysterically, though, rolling off my stomach on to the floor. Lucky her, she didn't cushion the blow._

_As my breath returns, I prop my head up on to my elbow, watching Tifa laugh even harder, little tears forming at the corner of her eyes from laughing so hard. She smiles a lot, and she laughs, but it's rare to see even this much laughter from her._

_I feel a grin split my face, and it's strange, not having to deal with anyone. I'm still expecting someone to pop up, and ruin the moment; just put us in a rut for the night, despite the fact that they all pretty much know this is a night for us._

_Still, that probably wouldn't stop them, depending on circumstances._

_Tifa's stood up now, kicking her other shoe off, and finding the other. She stands there, the shoes dangling from her fingers, hand on hip, a little glare on her face._

"_I'm going to go change, I'm exhausted."_

_I grin again, "Yeah."_

"_Yeah, that was...a nice dance," she turns and walks away._

_We had danced, after promising each other that we wouldn't leave. No music, but with a scenery we had, I don't think we really even needed music._

_I spun her around a couple times, just because she wanted to see her dress flare out. _

_I sigh, jumping to my feet, before stretching out my arms. It was a long night,...well, day. I mean, look at what I had to go through to get here?_

_Flying ninja stank bombs...really, who would've seen that one?_

_I move upstairs to change into my pajamas. My shirt's discarded on the floor, my pants in a heap, and I've gotten as far as to pull up my plaid blue pajama pants when she makes her way in. _

_She doesn't knock, and I turn swiftly, startled, and almost trip over my shoes I left lying the middle of the floor._

_She smiles slightly, her hair lose around her shoulders, skin pale in the soft moonlight. She's washed the make-up off, and opted for some thermal pants, and a tank top._

_I blink a couple times, looking side to side before meeting her eyes again, "What?"_

_She smiles softly again, "I...I just can't believe you did all of that..."_

_My eyes soften slightly, "Well...we don't get to go out much...so the times we do, it should be special."_

_Her smile widens, "Thank you."_

"_You're welcome. I mean, it was for both of us,"I state._

_She tilts her head to the side slightly, still smiling._

"_...What?"_

"_...I just don't get how...you can do that much, I mean, Cloud that couldn't have been easy for you to pull all of that off–_

"_I love you," And it's as simple as that._

_She stutters, caught off guard._

"_There isn't any other reason I need. I'll do for you what I can," I shrug, "All that I can."_

_She smiles slightly, stepping forward in the dim light, stretching up on her toes, a smile on her face, eyes closing, a hand pressed to my chest...and she kisses me._

_It's more, sweet and tart, tasting of her apple chap-stick, the smell of cinnamon on her skin; hair of silk that runs through my fingers like water, spilling off her shoulders in a cascading waterfall, and the tiny pressures of her finger tips along my shoulders._

_I stare at her for a moment, as she kisses me, eyes wide, and I'm not sure why I'm surprised really. I mean, I should at least get a kiss for all I did for her...I mean, that probably sounds kind of bad, but I think I deserve at least a kiss, if not more. I deserve several._

_And I think she knows this. She pulls me closer, and I find her waist, past the initial shock of it all. I still don't understand why I'm shocked._

_At some point and time, we stumbled towards my bed, falling back on it, and she giggles beneath me, muffled against my lips. I drag my fingers down her sides in a wispy motion, making her laugh again, twitch against my hold. I relent, though, hooking my thumbs around her hips, letting them rest there as I kissed her jaw._

_It's slow and lucid, the way we move, in a rhythm of our own. How each movement is in time, how we're in tune with each other almost. _

_Little delicate kisses along her collarbone as her shirt hits the floor; tiny nips along her neck as my thumbs hook under the line of her pants, dragging down. She growls a bit when she fights with the buttons to my pants; whimpers slightly as the catch is undone behind her back._

_And it's here, when she's pressed beneath me, my fingers lingering, darting on the edge of a realm unexplored that I expect it._

_It's her signal, that always breaks us apart. That little press of her palm on the left side of my chest; just enough pressure to stop me, tell me not yet, and for me to comply._

_...but...but it doesn't come, and I'm the one who breaks the kiss, flitting backwards, blinking, startled. _

_She opens her eyes, looking up at me, where I'm kneeling, looking down at her._

_And we just stare at each other for a moment, a moment in time of complete silence. _

_And she blinks. Smiles slightly, and I frown, just a little hesitant still. _

_Her hand wraps around my wrist softly, her fingers brushing the back of my hand soothingly and I understand. _

_I lean down to kiss her gently, softly._

_And she was all I knew._

**A/N: **So I lied, no responses. EX-hausted. BUT STILL! This should make up for lack of responses to your reviews. I'll respond next time...FOR REAL. I swear. I hope this was epic, because I was going for it...LONGEST CHAPTER EVAH. And they made love (sex as some of you heathens like to call it). And yes, Vince was a chef of awesomeness. That could come back, we'll just have to wait and see. And here all you guys thought I was going to torture poor Cloudie, and I didn't. Aren't you glad? He got the cheese. XD Later loves!


	43. You Should Rephrase That

_You Should Rephrase That_

_Ring. Ring. _

_Erg, what's with the dull, consistent ringing? Honestly, I just want to sleep. Stop the ringing...please._

_Ring. Ring._

_I'm not even going to open my eyes to see what's causing this annoying ringing. It's should just explode._

_Explode now._

_Ring. Ring._

_Damn._

_I scratch my leg...it still itches...I didn't..._

_Hmm, what's this? _

_With my eyes still closed, I can feel...I have an extra leg...no make that two, and...I have...I have breasts._

_Wait, what?_

_I open my eyes slowly, wincing at the sudden light. _

_...Oh...**yes**._

_Tifa...in my arms, naked. Naked Tifa in my arms._

_This has got to be the best morning of my life. Beautiful, beautiful, wonderful Tifa, in my arms, after a night that we made love._

_Beautiful, beautiful, wonderful, excruciatingly gorgeous Tifa, in my arms, after the first night we made love, hair shining in the sunlight, in my bed, with–_

_Ring. Ring._

–_with the persistent-ass ringing of my phone._

_I groan, no way in hell am I answering that. I pull Tifa closer to me, and she mumbles something incoherent, and curls up against my chest as I try to block out the ringing._

_It's a nice, warm sensation, lying next to her, her bare skin against mine. Our legs are tangled in knots, and my blanket has been dislodged from the bed. It's great._

_Ring. Ring._

_God bless, people! Leave us be! I just want to lay here with beautiful, wonderful, excruciatingly gorgeous Tifa in my arms and sleep, dammit._

_Ring. Ring._

_Tifa shifts in my arms, and sits up quickly, blinking rapidly. She rubs her eyes, as I prop my head up on my elbow, watching her._

_Ring. Ring._

_She yawns, opening her eyes towards me, catching me staring, and she turns red. She slowly pulls up the covers, making haphazard wrap out of the sheets before standing and crossing the room quickly to my phone._

"_Hello?"_

"_Tifa! Bout damn time, woman!" I hear the voice shout through the receiver._

"_Hello, Cid. What can I do for you?" she sighs into the phone._

_Cid's voice comes through muffled on the other end, and Tifa responds to each of his questions._

"_So, it'll be in one month? And we're staying in Costa Del Sol for a week? You're paying for this right?" she teases._

_She pauses a moment, her jaw hanging open, "You **are**? ...Well, yes I do find that hard to believe. If I so recall, you charged us for that airship ride–_

_Heh, cheapskate._

"_Alright! Alright Cid. What? Go on, ask," Tifa shakes her head at me, annoyed, and I grin wider at her._

_I watch as her mouth contorts into a shape of horror, and she drops the phone as she flushes red. It bangs on the ground and she scrambles to pick it up; I watched, amused, wondering what Cid said._

_She picks up the phone, a beep sounding from it, before shouting into it, "Cid! I cannot believe you! No wait! I can, you **dog**!"_

_I hear a chuckle emit from the phone, and Tifa's eyes go wide in shock. She hit the speaker phone when she picked it up. She struggles to turn it off, but Cid's voice only manages to get louder the more she hits the button._

"_So, I'm judging by your reaction you two finally did it. Hey Spike! Which bed you two in?" he chuckles again, and I scramble to my feet in shock, falling off the bed with a loud thump._

"_Listen, as lovely as it is that you two learned about the birds and the bees...what kind of expression is that anyways? The birds and the bees...who came up with that bullshit?" Cid continues, unawares, as Tifa still struggles with speaker phone button._

_I swear, she's so red she's almost purple. It'd be funny if Cid wasn't teasing her about us two..._

_Oh shit...Cid knows. That means everyone will know._

_Oh great._

_I wrench the phone from her hand, "Goodbye Cid," and I shut it fast._

_I sigh, relieved, and place the phone down on my desk. Tifa punches my arm, and I flinch backwards, rubbing it._

"_What was–_

"_Why did you say anything?! I could've played dumb! Now he knows you were in the bed–_

"_Tifa..."_

"_I mean, it's not like I don't care he knows, I just know he's going to annoy the hell out of me about it–_

"_Tifa...you answered my phone. He was going to know anyways."_

"_Oh."_

"_Yeah."_

"_Sorry, you know, about punching you then."_

_I smirk, "Not to mention you're the worst liar ever."_

_She stares in open shock, before huffing loudly and stomping away, gripping her sheet around her chest._

_I follow in disbelief as she marches out of my room, "You know it's true, Tifa. Come back with my sheet."_

_She shakes her head, "Oh, because being a liar is so great. You would know, cross-dresser...or maybe that wasn't a lie?" she glanced over her shoulder, "Maybe that was the real you."_

_Did she have to go there? Come on, that was one freaking low blow._

_Tifa marches down the steps, and I follow close on her heels, "Yeah, because you did a great job imitating a prostitute."_

_She freezes, cringing, and turns to look at me dangerously, "I cannot believe you just said that, especially after last night!"_

"_You started it."_

"_Oh!" she stomps her foot, and turns again, walking towards the kitchen, but I reach out, grabbing the trail of sheet she drags, and she yelps. _

_She grabs furiously at the knot around her chest as I pull her back towards me, and she fights it, wrenching at the sheet._

_But me, being the idiot I am, have completely forgotten how bloody freaking strong she is. Ouch._

_She grabs a fist full of the sheet, still turned slightly towards me and give a ferocious yank, pulling me forward. My foot catches on the floor, and I stumble forward, running into her. She yells again as we crash onto the floor._

_Somehow (with my bad ass swordsman skills) I manage to catch myself on my arms, preventing from full out squashing her. She slowly opens her eyes to see me bracing myself over her, and she shakes her head softly._

"_I shouldn't have answered the phone."_

"_You shouldn't have answered the phone," I shrug as much as I can._

_She giggles a little bit, and I lower myself slowly to kiss her once on the lips. _

_She pulls back, "Let's go back upstairs."_

_I raise an eyebrow in response, and she slaps my arm lightly before replying, "Not just that, pig. I'm talking about sleeping...completely ignore Cid's phone call. It was a dream–no nightmare. It was a delusion, so let's go back to sleep."_

"_Okay. It's only nine, anyways. Sleep could be good...or..."_

"_Cloud, you're such a guy."_

"_Good, at least you know that much. Don't ever bring up the cross-dressing again."_

"_I don't know if I can promise that."_

"_At least not in a fight...or public. And if I recall correctly, it was for a certain someone in a rather revealing blue dress."_

_She giggles beneath me, "Yes...alright, I'll give you that. It was a heroic cross-dressing moment."_

"_I'm glad you weren't a good prostitute."_

"_...I guess that's a compliment."_

"_It is," I reply standing to pull her up._

_She clutches at the sheet still with one hand, grabbing my other, "Well, I'm glad you weren't a good prostitute either."_

_I shrug as I pull her into my arms, kissing her cheek, "Good prostitutes don't get married, do they? So we'd be out of luck if we were."_

"_Excuse me?" she asks, eyes wide, pulling back slightly._

_Oh shit...did I say that out loud? Oh my God... why were we still talking about prostitutes?! Arg! It's suppose to be a romantic moment! Not when I'm reliving the most embarrassing moment of my **life**! Not to mention the fact we're talking about prostitutes here, people! Prostitutes! That's not exactly a marriage friendly topic!_

_This is definitely not morning after material here. I mean, aren't we suppose to be all cuddly upstairs in the bed? You know, cliche wake-up moment where she says 'Hi' and I say 'Hi' back? Why the hell is it always me that gets screwed over?_

_...well, I mean...okay, I guess it has to even out. I mean...last night...yeah...okay, well, I mean. Alright, fuck it, I'll deal with it._

"_Um...what I meant was–_

_But, I don't have to save myself from that moment. I'm still trying to figure out if what happens next is a good or bad thing._

_A key rattles in the door knob and both Tifa and I step away from each other, turning towards the door._

_Barret walks in slowly, depositing a couple bags at the entrance before looking up._

"_Oh fuck me," he mutters before crossing his arms, "Or should I rephrase that, Tifa?"_

_Tifa is about as white as the sheet before a red tinge slowly begins to spread from her cheeks all the way down to her neck. That's when I look down._

_Oh crap._

_I reach over slowly, grabbing a small bit of Tifa's sheet, pulling it across my waist, avoiding Barret's scrutiny._

_Tifa growls, before wiping the sheet out of my hand, "This is your fault," she hisses._

_I slowly take a step to my right, moving to stand behind Tifa, no longer fully exposed._

_Barret sighed again, rubbing his face with his hands, "You got five minutes," he said, before turning around and walking out the door._

_Well...that was awkward._

_Yeah, that was definitely a bad thing._

**A/N:** Holy jimeny cricket! I ...wow...I didn't actually think...I'd get 600 reviews...WOW...I'm...I'm speechless. Thank you guys, SO MUCH! Woot!

**Calistar Heir**: Oh Haruki! Let her have her moment of misty-eyed romance!  
**CanoeingCutie:** WHOA! Calm down, it's okay! I appreciate your vigor, though. It's great...squee away! I want to hear you! I totally love you too  
**Sabith**: I don't know if Cloud would agree about the whole perfect fairy tale, especially after this chapter...hehheh, thank you so much!  
**VinVal**! Yes! The cheese! don't worry about that, I understand busy. Oh I know. I fear the day I end this...but it should be for a while, I believe.  
**Rhyssa! **I know he hasn't! I swear, he's awful! Maybe soon...after all, Cid's wedding is only in a month! And, as for Barret...well, at least it wasn't the kids?  
**Summer Jasmine: **Thanks so much!  
**Eloa: **He's still working on the perfect moment to ask. that'll probably be epic, too. But don't worry! We'll get there!  
**Miss Murderess **Thanks so much!  
**Saegae/Sael **Thanks for reviewing so much! You really helped to get my goal! Love ya!  
**onewingedangel** hahahaha! Yes, DoC2 should so totaly be out Vinnie's mad cooking skillz. for sure  
**Frek** heh, neither can I. I fear the day this fic ends.  
**DemonLouLou **Aw! Thank you so much for reviewing! it means alot, but don't sweat it. I hope you enjoy this chappie!  
**True Heaven **He'll get there eventually...Cloud's a little slow.  
**bang on the head **Thank you!  
**tri 17 **Sorry for leaving it hanging! I should've updated sooner, ah well...hope it was soon enough for you.  
**Bianka! **I'm so glad you agree about the love scene. I don't think it would've fit with the rest of the story. thanks dear! And I loved the little soundtrack clip you sent me! Thanks!  
**Niktastic **It was epic?! Good! I'm so glad, like seriously. I worked my butt of that chapter. ...heh, guess it wasn't much fo a break, eh?  
**missysilivan **oh, I'm happy to be on your alert list, and happy to please! Enjoy!  
**Musically Gone **yes, the eye war, he should've stabbed his eye with a fork...that'd teach that stupid eye.  
**Zaz9-zaa0 **heh, Vin poisons the waiter? heh, I'll have to keep that in mind  
**zenbon **yeah, maybe Aerith was coaching Tifa in her comebacks  
**Only the best **Yes, no sex...use your imagination. I don't know, sex scenes can either make or break a story, and I felt i could very possibly break this story.  
**ishmaranara **life did, but only for a night. He's still Gaia's bitch, no matter what he does  
**MEILI! **erg! All you reviews! I love them all! That's one thing I tried to accomplish with this story, not just rushing into everything. I wanted to make sure that it actually made sense for them to get together and make love.  
**anarchic9 **...--...wow, megadeath + Fluff? You really do have a choice mind there...I'll have to try it sometime  
**Chickkie **One breath? Heh, that's 42 chapters of insanity. I'm surprised you haven't gone crazy. Thanks!  
**lelapa17** ah, we had to balance it out, though. A complete chapter of not messing up...well, I mean, look at this one. Barret saw him neked.  
**L. Duckie **Yes, I thought about it, but Cloud's had enough Cake trauma to last him a life time.


	44. Wait For Me

**A/N: **My advice, to get the full affect (or at least to get in the state of mind I was in) listen to IZ's somewhere over the rainbow. That's all I'm saying this chapter, sort of rushed trying to get this out before class (23 minutes) anyone else notice that chapters/profiles have been screwy lately? Thanks for reviews loves!

_Wait For Me_

_So now I sit, fully clothed thank you, across from Barret at the table. He's just **glaring **at me, like, with these laser-eyes of doom. I mean, I'm sorry it happened (well, not the whole thing with Tifa), I really, trust me, I reallllllly wished he wouldn't have seen us. That was bad._

_Very bad._

_He grunts softly and shakes his head, "Please tell me you used protection."_

"_I think that's personal."_

_He narrows his eyes at me, "Now you listen here, you little bastard–_

"_Yes, I did find the one you left me. No, wait, that was Tifa."_

_That shuts him up, but his glare only gets worse, more severe, more scrutinizing._

"_I just don't know if you're good for her," Barret growls._

_I blink a couple times, "What?"_

_Yeah, what?_

_Of course I' m good for Tifa!_

"_It was one thing before Cloud, but if you mess this up," Barret shakes his head, "There will be blood."_

"_Why–_

_The phone rings._

_Thank God someone is on my side._

_I walk over, picking up the phone and answering it as Tifa walks downstairs._

"_Well, the kids are settled in again," she smiles._

_Barret glares._

"_I need something delivered," a voice replies to me._

_Well, no shit, "When, and where sir?"_

"_Heh heh, Cloud...you just called me sir."_

_Oh, son of a– "Reno, nice to hear from you. What do you want?"_

"_I told you, I need...well, the boss needs something delivered," Reno says._

"_Okay, I got that much. Can you tell me the location now?"_

"_Listen, Barret...about earlier," Tifa starts._

"_No," he shakes his head, "No, I don't want to hear any excuses. I don't care if it's the truth or the lie. I don't care if it was strip poker or sex, or that he lost his boxers in the bottom of the sixth inning of pillow-ball. I don't give a damn. So please, for the sake of all of our sanity, let's move on."_

"_Okay...then," she turns red again._

"_First, we need you to go to Mideel...to deliver a package there, and then pick a package up there, to deliver it to Gongaga. Mideel is to Elena, and Gongaga is to Tseng."_

"_Tseng is in Gongaga?"_

"_Don't...ask. Seriously, just don't ask. Tseng will kill you with his doom glare. I'm one of the two survivors of that," Reno replies, serious._

"_And the other would be...?"_

"_Rude, but like...I mean, Rude's got the meanest glare. You have to know he does. That's why he wears his sunglasses all the time...to protect the lesser beings."_

"_Right."_

"_So, you think you can handle that?" Reno asks._

"_Yeah. When? I mean, that's going to be a pretty extensive trip, you realize? That's about three nights out, so I need to know when it needs to be delivered by."_

"_You need to get to Tseng by six o'clock tomorrow night."_

"_What? Listen, it'll take a day just to get to Mideel, and like half a day to get to Gongaga. That's pushing it, Reno."_

"_Then I suggest you leave now, else the big boss man...he'll be pissed, and blame me for it."_

"_Couldn't you have called sooner, you know, a bit more warning?"_

"_That's why he'll be pissed."_

"_Oh...procrastinator."_

"_Delivery boy."_

_I hang up the phone on that note, sighing before scratching the back of my head._

"_Who was that?" Tifa asks._

_I walk over, "Reno. I've got to go...he's got two packages he needs me to deliver, and I'll be crossing continents, so I need to get out of here as soon as possible."_

"_What? Can't you stick around for dinner? Barret's staying–_

"_No, Tifa. I'm sorry."_

"_It's okay," Barret starts in, "I don't think I'll have much of an appetite for a while, especially eating with you, Spike...we'll do it some other time." _

_Trust me, buddy. You weren't the only one scarred by that little incident._

"_Well, I'm going to go say bye to the kids," Barret says, standing, "And give you two some time alone. I'll remember to knock next time."_

"_Right, thanks," Tifa says, absent-mindedly._

_Barret heads outside to find Denzel and Marlene, while Tifa trails me up the steps._

"_So, you really have to go? That wasn't just to get rid of Barret?" she asks._

_I pull my bag out of my closet, "Yes, it wasn't just to get rid of Barret."_

"_When will you be back?"_

"_I don't know yet, Tifa. I have to be in Gongaga by 6 o'clock tomorrow evening."_

"_Well, that shouldn't be to hard."_

"_I have to stop in Mideel first."_

"_Oh."_

"_So I'll be pretty much going none stop. I might spend some recovery time in Gongaga, once I get the package delivered, so until then, I might not have much time to call," I sigh, that sounded bad, "But I will, just to try and check up on everyone," something else, "And to tell you I love you."_

_Her head bumps against my back, and I pause from packing as she wraps her arms around my waist. I turn in her hold, looking down at the top of her head._

"_Hey, I'll be back before you know it."_

"_It's been a while, you know, since you've had to make a long delivery."_

"_It would be longer, if they weren't rushing me."_

"_Be careful, okay?"_

"_I will."_

"_And you **will** call...even if just for a minute, understand?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Okay, well, I guess I'll pack you up some meals then."_

"_Thank you, Tifa."_

_Fifteen minutes later, I was on the road, driving by myself. Alone. By myself. No kids, no Yuffie or Barret...no Tifa._

_God this sucks. I forgot how much this sucks. I mean, I've been doing deliveries pretty constantly for a while now, but it's been a while since I've had to do an over-night stay somewhere._

_Man this sucks._

_I mean, it's worse when you know you're going to be out...that you've got to like...count down the days, hours, minutes...until you actually get to sleep in your own bed._

_Crap. With this schedule, I'm probably going to have to sleep on the boat. I hate sleeping on boats. The boat always hits that massive wave, and I fall on the floor, and get a bruise on my forehead where I clunked on that sharp-ass corner on the nightstand._

_And yes, that has happened to me more than once. I should get like, safety straps, or like, bars around my bed._

_Wait...then I'd be like a baby in a crib. No, no bars._

_Babies...marriage...prostitutes._

_Crap, every time I think of marriage now, I'll think of prostitutes...and Barret seeing me in the flesh...literally._

_Damn, he'll probably tell Cid, who will in turn tell Yuffie, who will in turn tell Vincent, and then Nanaki will know. It wouldn't surprise me if I came home in a few days and half of Edge is laughing their ass off about it. I'm going to murder Barret. I still haven't murdered him for leaving that condom in my drawer..._

_I still haven't murdered Cid for making me wear a kilt._

_And I still haven't murdered Yuffie for taking that picture...I should probably murder Vincent for not stopping her in time._

_I think that pretty much completes my 'people to die' list._

_Oh and Reno, for sending me on this stupid trip._

_I sigh, leaning over the handle bars of Fenrir. At least he's been loyal to me...at least, since that incident. _

_Listen hear you stupid bike, I don't have time for your games, so if you're going to mess up, do it now so I can fix it and be done with it._

_...No? Okay then, glad that's settled._

_...I hope._

_Holy crap I'm bored! So bored! I don't understand why, usually I enjoy riding Fenrir. I mean, I like to drive._

_So what the hell is wrong with me?!_

_I can't concentrate on the road, my mind keeps wandering._

_What was I thinking about earlier..._

_Marriage..._

_...shit...prostitutes._

_Arg! I need a way to change the correlation of prostitutes to marriage._

_Marriage...Cid's getting married. Alright, let's try and line up Cid and marriage._

_Cid...marriage...Shera...babies...mini-Cid's... tiny, little, midget smoking Cid's who curse by the age of four...trying to fly an airship. No wait, they'd get those little toy robotic airships, and eat candy cigarrettes, and they'd chase me with those damn little flying airships, while their father sat in the back ground and laughed. No._

_Let's try that again: Cid...marriage...prostitutes..._

_Oh my God...mental images! No! No! No! Get it out! Please, someone get it out! God, at least I didn't make a bad-looking cross dresser...but Cid? As a woman? _

_Oh I think I'm going to throw up...I need to pull over... oh God...stubble, and...long flowing locks._

_Oh...think think think something else...Barret...okay, Barret...in a kilt...for Cid's wedding-marriage-prostitutes-Barret in a dress._

_Agh! My eyes! They burn! Oh! They're watering...of all the things..._

_Alright! One more time...if it doesn't work this time, I'm stabbing myself in the foot...for real._

_Deep breaths, calm down now._

_When you think marriage, what's the first thing that comes to mind?_

_Tifa._

_Tifa in a blue dress...with yellow roses in her hair, and her pearls around her neck, her pearl ring on her finger. Tifa with a growing belly, in that same blue dress, slightly stretched, in a villa on the outskirts of Costa del Sol, watching the dolphins off the balcony...and me, as I sit in the sand watching my three year old son try and build a sand castle...which looks more or less like a hump...but I try to help him, and so does his older sister, five...she's got her mother's hair, and my eyes, and she picks out seashells to decorate my son's sand-hump._

_Okay...I can live with that one._

_Scratch that, I could die with that one. And look, here I am, already at the port..._

_...at the port._

_Cloud, no, Cloud...listen to me...six o-freaking-clock...tomorrow, Mideel, Gongaga, Rufus._

_Cloud, Cloud, the ship is leaving. Cloud...Cloud no! Cloud! Cloud no! Turn back around! What the hell are you doing?! What are you doing! NO! Two hours wasted if you do this! Cloud! _

_Shit._

_So, two hours back...back back back...I'm not going into detail here, but I'll tell you this much._

_My conscience put Cid to shame...that's all I'll say._

_I can't believe I'm doing this._

_No, I'm doing this. And then here's the bar, and I'm already parking. Walking in, and there she is...the bar's closed, why did she close the bar? She's washing dishes, she doesn't even turn around when I walk in._

"_Bar's closed today, sorry."_

_But I don't answer, I just walk up to her, and she turns, slightly startled, but even more so when she realizes it's me._

"_**Cloud**? Aren't you suppose to be–_

_And I kiss her. She waves her hand frantically, I've caught her off guard. She blinks rapidly as I pull back._

"_You're suppose to be...on your way to Mideel! What are you doing–_

"_Listen to me."_

_She blinks, startled then nods her head slowly._

"_I need to know something first before I can leave."_

"_You could've just called–_

"_No, I really couldn't have. I need to know something."_

"_What?" she asks, her eyes concerned, "Is there something wrong?"_

"_No, well...everything will be okay, if you'll just tell me this."_

"_What?"_

_I sigh, stating slowly, "I need to know that you'll be here when I get back...waiting for me."_

_She looks at me incredulously, "Of course I will, Cloud. I've always waited for you."_

"_This is different though, I need to know that you'll be waiting for me, okay?"_

"_Cloud, I still don't see what you're getting at," she says grabbing my hand._

"_I need to know," and she gasps when I slip the ring on her finger, "That you'll be waiting for me. I need to know that."_

_And I think I see tears in her eyes, but I'm to busy falling into wine, and she smiles, and nods her head, "Of course I'll wait for you."_

_And she kisses me, a melding sort of kiss that's warm and flows like honey, with her hand pressed against the back of my head, and it's right. It feels so right, that I might get my dream, my image of marriage._

_She breaks the kiss reluctantly, and presses her forehead up against mine, "You need to go," she whispers._

"_I'm sorry, I should've waited–_

"_No, it was right. It was perfect. I'll wait for you, okay? And...you'll call me, right?"_

"_Yes, and I promise I'll make this all up to you when I get back."_

"_I know, I love you."_

"_I love you too, but...can you do one thing for me?"_

"_What?"_

"_Will you buy a blue dress?"_


	45. Head Mess

**A/N:** I'm aware there are some non-real words in this chapter ...cohorting, sheetless, sheetful etc. Bite me. This is how I write. Unreal words are the awesomeness...that and the fact I'm lazy. I didn't want to post this until the updating system got fixed, but it's not a very important chapter...mostly humor, still, I've let this sit too long. There's a lot cursing in this chap, too. I was in a bad mood. Thanks for reviews loves! Enjoy the chappie!

_Head Mess_

_Rain sucks. _

_Seriously. It sucks bad...on an ocean, in a storm, when you're going to be late anyways._

_It suuuuccckkkksssss._

_Thank you for your time and attention. That is all._

_

* * *

_

_Ouch! Gawd! Bless! Dammit! What the f– _

_Oh, what do you know? I fell asleep and hit my head on the stupid night table._

_Again._

_Shit, this sucks._

_You know what else sucks? Turks. Turks freaking suck._

_Ass. Yes, that's it. They suck ass._

_

* * *

_

_Garg, Gongaga. Zack's parents use to live here. I heard they moved away about a year ago, don't know where though. I shoulder my sword and move down the streets to the inn._

_I don't even know what's in this package, nor do I care. Turks, course...what if they're up to no good? I should check it out...but that would go against my client privacy policy...thing...y._

_That, and if I don't know what the hell it is I can claim ignorance if it all goes to the shits._

_That and I really just don't give a damn right now...no good or good._

_Yeah, but still... how much 'no good' can someone do in Gongaga?_

_Yeah, it's harmless._

_I sigh, moving through the streets, before arriving at the inn. I move past the innkeeper and up the steps to the third floor. I don't plan on staying the night, and I'd rather make this pretty quick. I just left Fenrir on the ship. You'd be surprised at how tight they pack in bikes and vehicles back there. I should sue._

_But I'm not going to. Too much effort. Unless Fenrir is harmed._

_Here we are, room twenty-one._

_I bang on the door twice with a dull fist...dull fist? Kay, don't know where that one came from... Anyways, and there's some shuffling behind it. It creaks open slowly to reveal a less than pleased Tseng. I swear, he looks as about as happy as me._

_Which is kinda sad._

_Oh pun!_

_Or was it?_

_God my brain hurts._

"_You're late."_

"_Fifteen minutes," pretty damn good considering the crap I went through._

"_You're late."_

"_That doesn't mean it's free."_

_Bitch, I don't deliver pizzas. _

_I watch as he presses his lips together in anger, fighting to maintain that cool visage he __**always**__ has. I mean, you can't be that cold for that long, especially in Gongaga. He's probably ready to shoot himself._

_...or me._

_Yeah, leaving would probably be a good idea right about now._

"_You're bleeding."_

"_Had an accident; sign here," I forfeit the package and the receipt paper over, and he signs it smoothly._

_He looks up at me, even eyes, "You know, for as bad as a mood you seem to be in, you're happy."_

"_W-what?" What the hell? Who the hell says that? What the hell did he say? _

"_It's true, I can tell. You seem lighter."_

_Did you weigh me? What the hell does that mean? _

"_What happened? Did you ask Tifa to marry you?"_

_What the– How the hell? The bastard!_

"_What?"_

"_So, it is true."_

_How the hell does he– I'm so confused!_

"_When did this happen?"_

"_What?"_

"_When did you get engaged to Tifa?"_

"_How do you know– _

"_Do not question how I know, it's just a simple deduction."_

_Yeah right, piss off bitch._

"_Yesterday, before I left to do this job."_

"_Ah, so I was right."_

_Wait... "So you really didn't know?"_

"_Of course I knew."_

_What the fuck?! I'm running on about three hours of sleep, I've been slapped by fricken Elena to deliver it to Reno which will turn into a punch, __**and**__ I've got blood running down my forehead, and the woman I love and recently engaged to is not beside me. As if it's bad enough, STOP MESSING WITH MY HEAD. NOW._

_I shake my head once, I'm going to attribute this confusion with blood loss._

"_Am I actually having this conversation with you?"_

_He blinks, "What?"_

_Ha! Your turn to be confused._

_I hate you._

"_Excuse me?"_

_Shit, "I said, keep it to yourself. We're planning on announcing it at Cid's wedding."_

_He blinks again, eyes widening slightly, "Cid's getting married?"_

_I nod my head once, speaking requires too much effort._

"_I wonder who'll be next then, if all of AVALANCHE's old members are hooking up," a small smirk appears on his lips, "Perhaps Yuffie and Barret?"_

"_No, she's marrying Mr. I'm-not-really-a-vampire-just-manic-depressive."_

_Alright, Cloud two, Tseng...like...eight._

_Shut up I'm having a bad day._

"_Excuse me?"_

"_You can figure that out for yourself."_

_Slam!_

_Bitch-door-slammed in your face! That counts...as like ten. Cloud wins._

_Shut up I'm tired! Don't make fun of me!_

_Walk away, just walk away; that's the only way you'll salvage any dignity out of this moment. _

_Gah, I hate– _

_Oh shitwhatthefuck–_

_Is that...? It can't be...no...no! _

"_STOP FERRY STOP!" Oh shit oh shit oh shit! Fenrir! __**Home**__! TIFA!_

_It wasn't suppose to leave for another– _

_Five minutes ago! God! No! B...ga...ass!_

_I can't even __**think**__ right! Please, oh please, gil be in pocket and not in Fenrir._

_Dammit! The only money I have is just what I got from Tseng! Shit, shit shit! This isn't enough money for a ferry back, and a night at the inn..._

_Warm bed...transportation..._

_Warm bed...transportation..._

_...cold gutters...Tifa..._

_God bless._

_Maybe Tseng?_

_Yeah right, after that bitch-door slam in the face, he'll probably kill me. Still, Fenrir's on the boat, and I need Fenrir off the boat...it does no good if Fenrir is sailing around the ocean, or gets stolen...or or or..._

_What if the ship sinks? I won't be there to save him! He's my bike! Shit!_

"_Shit!" Must call Tifa._

_Send...Send! Hurry up and ca– _

_Oh sweet ringing. I stand there, twitching, my foot tapping. I keep shaking, this is not good._

"_Answer the phone, Teef...come on, answer it..."_

"_Hello, you've reached Strife Delivery Services and Seventh Heaven. Cloud, Tifa, Denzel, and Marlene are not– _

_Screw you, answering machine._

_Beep!_

"_Tifa...it's me, Cloud...listen, um...I ran into a little hitch– _

"_Hitch, Cloud? Oh ma gawd, that's about as lame as the time you said 'let's mosey'."_

"_Shut up Yuffie...anyways, my ferry left and Fenrir's on it..." Hell no...turn slowly, Strife...avoid the full shockage affect._

_Oh dear lord it's Yuffie..._

_And what the __**hell**__ is she doing sitting on Fenrir?! _

_She grins, blows on her fingernails like it's no big deal._

_Dammit, I'm stuck in Gongaga...with Tseng...and Yuffie._

_Life as I know it is over._

"_What are you doing here, Yuffie?"_

"_Barret called, said he found something interesting yesterday morning," she raises her eyebrows before giggling, "Care to elaborate?"_

"_No, now get off my bike," I move forward._

"_Ah ah ah," she sticks out her foot, "I don't think so. See, Barret said that he found a sheetful Tifa...so that means there was a sheetless you...explain. Now."_

"_No," It's a good thing Yuffie's so light really, else I wouldn't have been able to pick her up by her shoulders and drop her on the ground._

"_Hey! What are you doing?"_

"_Getting a room."_

"_Bastard! Aren't you even going to thank me?"_

_I stare down at her incredulously, "After everything you've put me through? The stink bomb? The kilts?"_

"_Hey, I was not the one who decided upon kilts."_

"_I don't care. You were the bearer of bad news."_

"_What ever happened to don't kill the messenger?"_

"_Maybe," I shrug my shoulders, "If you hadn't enjoyed it."_

_She scoffs, standing quickly and launching herself in front of me, "You aren't leaving. I'm not moving, not until you thank me."_

_I rev Fenrir's engine, "Good...it'll save me the trouble of chasing you down so I can run over you."_

_Her jaw drops, and she reacts quickly as I accelerate forward. She jumps to the side, landing on her butt, and I barely hear her call me an asshole over the wind._

_

* * *

_

_How did she know I was sheetless? She just said Barret told her Tifa was sheetful, so how did she...? _

_Maybe she's in cohorts with Tseng. I bet that's it._

_Why must I wake up to think of these things? It doesn't bother me __**that**__ much. Go back to sleep, self._

_...gosh..._

_Crazy cohorting Wutai people._

_

* * *

_

_There is a familiar weight on my side, though, this familiar weight is suppose to be non-existent at this point and time because this particular, familiar weight is suppose to be in Edge...and since I'm not in Edge, and on a completely different continent, it discerns me._

"_...Tifa?"_

_Sure enough, as I crack my eyes open in the dark, silent room, I find a familiar head resting on my chest, her locks splaying out, her hand resting beside her face on my chest. She sighs lightly, blinking before looking up at me._

"_What...are...?"_

_She grins sleepily, "I got your message."_

"_Oh," whoops, "Well, Yuffie– _

"_I know. How do you think I got in here?"_

"_What?"_

"_She picked the lock. She could've tortured you in your sleep, and you would've never known. For all you know, you could be bald right now."_

_I reach up instinctively, stopping though when she giggles, and I notice the familiar bangs in my eyes._

"_Oh."_

_She grins bigger, "I barely stopped her. If you don't believe me, your razor is over there on the desk."_

_I glance, shifting my head slightly, recognizing the small blade in the light._

"_Oh."_

"_You realize the only way she stopped is if I promised her you would thank her in the morning," she yawns, placing her head back down on my chest, "And, if you don't, then she'll shave my head...and personally, I don't know about you, but I like my hair."_

"_Oh," my mind races for a minute, "The children?"_

"_Barret."_

"_Travel?"_

"_Cid."_

_I feel kind of bad; she might've dropped something, well, I mean, stopped in the middle of something. I mean, I could've interrupted something or changed or plans. It's five fifteen, the last time I woke up was...like, three, and she wasn't here...which means..._

"_Cid brought you all the way here?"_

"_Nope, he dropped me off near the Golden Saucer. I drove here. I didn't know at the time you did have Fenrir with you, so I figured we'd need some type of transportation...and since you normally keep your wallet on Fenrir, I knew you'd pretty much be moneyless. You still haven't taken your wallet out of Fenrir?"_

"_I'm a low profile person. I only carry what I need."_

"_So...you carry three swords that weigh how much each? And yet you won't carry a tiny little leather flap in your back pocket. I really don't get you sometimes, Cloud Strife."_

"_I'm sorry, Tifa. You didn't have to. It's not like I've never slept outside before or anything."_

"_It's okay. I was looking for an excuse to come anyways."_

_What? But that isn't fair...I mean, she's exhausted. Worn out. If I had just seen Yuffie first, this whole escapade could've been avoided. She should be in Edge...asleep. Instead, she's here, exhausted from traveling for hours, and for what? Nothing, cause it turns out I did have Fenrir and I did have my wallet, thanks to Yuffie. Man, that sounds terrible._

"_I love you," she kisses me, nuzzling her nose up against my ear as she settles back in again._

_Oh...okay. It was for something._


	46. This Is Life

**A/N:** I felt drabbly...and Sabith you were right. I wasn't all there with the last chapter. The shortness of this chapter counteracts the speed of the update. If anyone objects...well, that's all you can do. Looks like you're out of luck. Forgive me of my scatterbrainedness last chappie, and hopefully this one will make up for it. 

_This Is Life_

_I wake with her warm presence on my left shoulder. I like how her hair feels against my chest, smooth and soft. She idly traces the scar just near my heart; it's a short, thin line that almost disappears in the groves of my flesh, in the dips of my muscles, barely noticeable. But...something tells me, she knows it by heart. It's easy to remember such a small piece of flesh, but there's something about the way she remembers it that makes it special. Different._

_I move my left hand, removing it from it's comfortable resting place on her shoulder to trace the line of flesh that breaks her skin between her breasts. It just barely nicks her collarbone, before sweeping all the way down across her rib cage. It still disconcerts me how she backed out of death that day...not that I mind...it's just this long strip of death across her chest; like a plague of nightmares has been stuffed inside of her and sewn up with this scar._

_It isn't right, that she had to suffer through that, and even more._

_The sunlight is streaming across the bed, slipping in through the gap in the curtains. It breaks across her face as she looks up at me. I let my hand slip back behind her, my fingertips just gracing across her lower back. She shivers in response, curling up against me, tossing her legs over mine. _

_Something cool and hard bumps up against my chest, and I look down, seeing a chain. I reach out, plucking it up gently between my fingers. There, suspended around the beaded chain, is that wolf ring I gave to her. It seems a whole lot more harsh, and cold compared to the ring she wears on her finger now. It's almost a bad memory, and I almost reach up to finger my matching earring._

_Is it a bad memory? It ties us, I guess, to the Geostigma...that and when we were apart and when I still wasn't sure I was myself._

_I think I'm myself now...I mean, no one can be this crazy. I broke the mold. I think I remember my mother telling me that once. I think I remember telling Tifa that once when we talked as kids. She told me it was my hair that did it. _

_The ring twirls, suspended in air, as the light catches the dull steel just barely._

_It seems a long time ago, really, that I gave her this. It was another life time, I think. Her finger grazes across my scar once more; that was another life time too._

_I feel more clear today. I was frazzled yesterday, my brain wasn't quite working, nor all the way there. As stupid as it sounds, I was skittish. _

_Well, three hours of sleep can do that to you._

_What time is it, anyways? Twelve...twelve o'clock...when was the last time I slept in this late? We need to go. Barret's probably needing to leave...the oil fields...and Tifa's got the bar, and I've got deliveries that are probably waiting on my voice-mail. _

_Yep, my little button is a blinking...that means many messages for Cloud...many places to travel, many people to see...much time spent away from where I really want to be._

"_What are you thinking?" she asks, kissing my chest lightly._

_I glance down, feeling heat spread across my body before clearing my throat, "How long have you been awake?"_

_She shrugs against me, and shifts to prop herself up on her elbow. She gazes down at me, a thoughtful expression on her face._

"_What's wrong?" she fiddles with the edges of the sheet, staring at me._

"_Nothing."_

"_Liar."_

_I sigh shortly, watch as she drops the sheet and settle back up against my shoulder, wrapping her arm around me again._

_"I had a bad day yesterday," I say, twisting a lock of her hair between my fingers._

_"Me too. Marlene accidentally broke the vase on the coffee table."_

_"The one Cid and Shera gave us from their vacation to Wutai?"_

_She nods her head, "The very one," she sighs._

_We sit in silence for a moment, and I study the wall across from me._

"_We need to– _

"_No. We don't need to do anything."_

_I wrinkle my eyebrows, frown, looking down to see her expression only to find the top of her head._

"_Tifa..." I reprimand softly._

"_We're on vacation."_

"_Tifa."_

"_Let me have my denial. Life can wait."_

_What are you talking about, Tifa? This is life, this right here...this is. I kiss the top of her head, relaxing back into my pillow._

"_Okay," I close my eyes slowly._

_I think we fell asleep, because when I opened my eyes again, the sky was red, and we only had ten minutes to get out to the Ferry._


	47. And This Represents

_And This Represents..._

_Man I'm tired...training has been a bitch lately. Speaking of which, what is he doing?_

"_Zack...what are you doing?"_

_I studied him from beneath my helmet, watching him as he struggled._

_He grunted in response, "What does it look like I'm doing, Cloud?"_

_There was sweat pouring off his face, his hair was matted, as he continued to lift the barbell weighted down. I blinked, I've seen Zack lift weights before, but he's never sweated this much._

"_I know you're lifting weights– _

"_Then why did you ask," he heaved again._

_I sighed, removing my helmet, "I was asking why because there's a pink ribbon tied to the barbell," I stated plainly._

_This caught him off guard, and the bar tipped. He struggled to right it, before placing it into his resting place. He glared up at me from the weight bench, the pink ribbon hanging delicately before his face._

"_Cloud," his breath was still heavy, "What have I taught you? Have you not been listening? Have you been ignoring my words of wisdom?"_

_What words of wisdom? "How long have you been doing that for, Zack?"_

"_Not important," he raised a finger, pointing up at me, "What is important is this," he tapped the pink ribbon._

_...Right..._

"_A ribbon...a pink ribbon is what is important..." and here he was talking about words of wisdom._

_He sighed, "Cloud Cloud Cloud...you're hopeless. It isn't the pink ribbon itself, but rather what the pink ribbon stands for."_

"_Which would be...?"_

"_Women, Cloud. Women. Man, you're clueless."_

_How does one make this correlation? Please, explain._

"_I don't get out as much as you, Zack. Do tell." I'm not the soldier who gets to run around the city and flirts with everything that...well...he just flirts...__**alot**_

"_Cloud," Zack regarded me seriously, "Women care about very few things in this world."_

"_Zack..."_

"_And in order to win over said women you must execute these things seamlessly."_

_I don't know if I like where this is going._

"_Exhibit A. Why would I be working my ass off here with a pink ribbon tied around the barbell which represents what, Cloud?"_

"_...women..."_

"_Good! Good! I knew you were a fast learner...anyways, what would this barbell have to do with women and me using it, Cloud?"_

_He can't be serious here._

"_Come on, Cloud. I know you can do it," he cooed._

_Sick._

"_Uh...women like...men..."_

"_Uh huh, uh huh..." he egged me on._

"_With nice bodies?"_

"_Precisely! Cloud! We may make a man out of you yet– _

"_Hey!"_

"–_but that is not the problem here today," he sits up, swinging his legs across the bench._

"_So what is the problem..."_

"_I obviously don't have nice enough of a body to get women."_

_Snort._

"_Cloud, I know you like looking, but your opinion counts for nothing– _

"_That wasn't what I meant," it's well known he's the biggest player around here._

"_Oh really," he raises his eyes in a mock suggestive way, "Then what did you mean Cloud?"_

"_I meant that I know for a fact you've had plenty of girls around the barracks."_

"_Pssh, they mean nothing," he said standing slowly._

"_But I thought– _

"_They're __**girls**__ like you said. I need women, nice, fine women who will cook for me."_

"_...you might not get 'women' if they heard you talk like that."_

"_That was just a couple things needed, okay? Don't call me a sexist pig!"_

"_I didn't, Zack."_

"_Sorry, habit."_

"_Uh huh."_

"_Shut up, Cloud. Anyways, so, in order to get women, I have to get a nice body," he pulled the pink ribbon off of the bar, "And I needed motivation. That's why I tied the ribbon around the bar. Women, it motivates me to do one more push, one more...so my body can be that much better for the ladies..."_

"_Right."_

"_Yep, that's the story, Cloud," he grinned wide._

_I paused for a moment, studying his grin which seemed too big and too forced for even Zack._

"_...she denied you the second date, didn't she?"_

_His face fell in an instant, "She's shrewd, man. Hope was my head, and she just sent it off to the guillotine without even a second glance back," he frowns, "It was for my birthday, too."_

"_A challenge for the great and almighty Zack?" I tease._

_He glares at me, "Don't mock me Cloud, this is serious."_

"_Obviously she's not. Playing hard to get?"_

_He threw his arm around my shoulder, "She's as slippery as a wet fish covered in oil."_

_I sigh, "Happy Birthday, Zack."_

_

* * *

_

_I hate you Zack._

'_Ha! And you thought I was wrong! What did I tell you? What did I tell you? Trust in the great Zack, man, and you never go wrong.'_

_I grunt, lifting the large barbell again._

'_Cloud, I don't think Tifa thinks you're getting out of shape.'_

_I appreciate the concern, Aerith...but I'll decide that for myself._

_Zack chuckles, 'Just don't over do it, little buddy.'_

'_Yeah, Zack showing up sore and disgruntled on my steps did nothing for our relationship.'_

_Ha! Backfired._

'_Shut up, kilt-boy.'_

_Bastard._

_I grunt, putting the barbell back into its place. It's been about three months since I finally finished this part of the basement. There was a storage closet down here for some of Tifa's wine, but I finished off an area all for myself._

_And I got a weight bench, too._

_Huzzah._

_I hear footsteps on the stairs, creaking. _

"_Cloud, what are you doing?" Tifa walks in the room, staring at me, "Have you been down here working out this entire time?"_

"_Yeah," I glance at her._

"_Why?" she walks over, sitting down beside of me as I sit up._

_Ouchkabibbles...shoulders are a little stiff._

_I roll one, holding it with my other hand, and shrug, "Just felt like working out."_

"_Well don't over do it," she states, rubbing her hand across my back lightly, "The others will be here soon."_

_My head falls, "I can't believe you invited them."_

"_I doubt I could've kept them away."_

"_They could've waited till Cid's wedding," We'll be seeing each other in what, two weeks again?_

"_Cloud," she reprimands softly, "They care about you."_

_I grunt in response, "It better not be like last year."_

_She sighs, smiling slightly, "We aren't going out in public. Just a nice, quiet dinner with friends."_

_Quiet? Don't kid me here. You remember the last time we all went out to dinner? Yuffie, does that ring a bell? She alone could bring down the whole restaurant. If there's casualties after this night, don't come crying to me._

"_They better not get me a dress again," I say, the wound still fresh in my mind._

_She giggles, standing and kissing my forehead lightly, "Come on, they've already filled that quota for the year."_

'_Man skirt'_

_Shut __**up**__ Zack._

"_Don't work out too much, kay? Don't want those muscles too big to fit in the sleeves," she squeezes my arm lightly._

'_Yeah, work out your thighs so you can show out how nice and muscular your legs are.'_

_Zack!_

"_Okay," I say, smiling at her, "I'll be up in a minute to take a shower."_

"_Good," she smiles again, kissing my cheek before disappearing out of the basement._

_I reach into my back pocket, pulling out the object slowly._

'_Is that...Tifa's hair band, Cloud? Why do you have that? Was that what you had tied around the barbell?'_

_Ask your boyfriend Aerith._

'_I knew I taught you something!'_

_God, I'm never going to hear the end of this._

'_But it worked, didn't it? Didn't it? Motivation, my man, that's all you need.'_

_Yes Zack, now stop gloating._

_He chuckles, _'_Happy Birthday, Cloud.'_

**A/N:** Another short chappie, but I spat it out while I could. Man I'm tired...I hope you enjoyed this one...a little bit different take, but not much. Prepare, for after Cloud's b-day, comes THE WEDDIN. Zomgoshes! Ah well, must get back to study time now. Later loves! Thanks for the reviews!


	48. If You Got It

_If You Got It..._

_There comes a time in every man's life when he realizes just how much he is mistreated and or abused._

_I unfortunately, have reached this conclusion on several occasions, at the results of several different people._

_Life hates me, and there lies the answer to everyone's question. Really, I mean, you can fix answer any problem with that bit of knowledge. I'm serious! Okay, for example, let's say…that…the world was in a crisis that involved the depletion of our water supply. How does life hating Cloud answer this? Why, like this of course! Life hates Cloud, therefore doesn't want anything to do with Cloud, so it wants to send Cloud to death…so it depletes the world's water supply in hopes of dehydrating Cloud to death._

_See? Point proven._

_Now, what has led us into this happy little speech? It's my birthday…which means I'm a year older…which means more things to deal with and less time to deal with them. Okay, granted, I'm not that old. Hell, I'm in my twenties…but you know what comes after twenties? Thirties…forties…and God forbid, fifties…eck…then sixties._

_Ugh, I can only imagine myself __**that **__old._

_"Kuh-loud!" Oh wait! I think I see a gray hair sprouting now._

_Yuffie flings herself in my general direction, and I easily evade her. She catches herself, turning to pout at me._

_"Geez, Cloud…you could at least let me hug you! It's your birthday for pete's sake!"_

_"Yeah, and I'd like to see another, so no death squeezes, please." That's right, back off bitch._

_She stomps her foot, "I'm not trying to kill you, Cloud."_

_It wouldn't stop you though, you fiendish little devil ninja, you—_

_"Hey hey! The party can begin, look whose here!" _

_Oh no…no no no no! Who the hell invited them?!_

_"Reno, Rude, glad you could make it," Tifa smiles at them from across the bar._

_Augh! NO! This is my birthday, and you know what?! Birthday boy always gets what he wants and I do __**not**__ want them here! They'll humiliate me! …well, Someone's going to humiliate me regardless, but with them here, it'll be like a double whammy._

_I move quickly towards the door, where Reno still stands, Rude just a step behind him._

_Reno grins as he sees me advance, "Hey, birthday boy! I think someone's due some spankings…is Tifa going to give them to you in the dead of night?"_

_BAM!_

_Bitch! In your face! _

_Reno grabs his forehead and his nose as the door bounces back off of it._

_"Ouch! My fwibben nobe!"_

_Oh get over it you big baby._

_"Cloud!" Tifa cries, "What are you doing?"_

_"There's something stuck in the door, Tifa…I can't get it shut," I prepare to slam it again._

_Reno throws up a hand in defence, "W-wait!"_

_Too late! I bring my arm back, preparing to do another smack down on Reno's face, but it gets cut short. I look up, seeing Rude brace his arm across the door._

_Oh come on, I didn't hurt him that much the first time._

_He's glaring at me from beneath his sunglasses, I can feel it. What was it that Reno said? To protect the lesser being? Take them off, I dare you…I'm not a lesser being._

_…God, I hate being short._

_Screw that, Rude's just too tall. I'm not short._

_"Cloud," Tifa hisses, and I glance over my shoulder._

_Shit…if anyone needs sunglasses to protect the lesser beings, it's Tifa. Doom glare...scary._

_I stare back, pressing my lips together tightly._

_She huffs, placing her hands on her hips, "They're just here to give you a card…and __**then **__they were going to leave."_

_…oops._

_"Erm…" Do I ask for the card now? That would be kind of rude…well…I mean, like slamming the door in Reno's face wasn't rude enough. _

_Speaking of humliation...look who did it? Me!_

_"Reno, do you need some ice for that?" Tifa asks, concerned._

_"Nah," he shakes his head once, putting down his hand, "I'm obay. Cloub's a panby anybway."_

_Oh! OH! A panby?! You freaking…oh if there weren't witnesses._

_…ahem, pansy, excuse me._

_I grip the door tightly with one hand, and I see Reno's eyes widen slightly. He thrusts a card at me._

_"Habby birfbay, Cloub." _

_I take it reluctantly, and shut the door gently behind the two Turks. I turn back around, face with Tifa's wrath. _

_"What?" I try to make my voice as innocent as possible._

_No sir, I certainly did not just break Reno's nose._

_She narrows her eyes, "Why were you so rude?"_

_…um… "Um…"_

_"It's because Rude was here!" Cid shouts from the bar, halfway drunk already._

_I smirk, as a chorus of laughs picks up in the room. Then I meet Tifa's eyes, and my smirk falls._

_Obviously she didn't think that was a very good answer._

_"Erm…I'm sorry?"_

_She shakes her head before moving away. Great, now she's pissed._

_Why did I slam the door into Reno's nose?  
_

_Oh yeah, because I detest him._

_That's why...and I didn't see him, scout's honor._

_"Hoo, boy, you sure did piss her off, didn't ya?"_

_She's like a cockroach, I swear._

_Yuffie grins, resting her chin on her hand, "You know, you still haven't thanked me for saving Fenrir for you."_

_"And you still haven't shaved Tifa's head."_

_She flicks her wrist, and there's a razor in her other hand. She raises her eyebrows, and smirks._

_"Just waiting for the right opportunity. Maybe tonight, though, when you two are all cuddley wuddely upstairs asleep, I'll sneak in and…well, the rest will be history," she grins wide._

_…grrr…_

_"I dunno, Yuff. Looks to me like there won't be any 'cuddley wuddely' tonight after the stunt he pulled."_

_I narrow my eyes…stay out of this Reeve…it's my birthday, and I can do what I want._

_Yuffie shrugs, "Doesn't matter to me…either way," she taps the razor lightly against her cheek._

_I turn my attention back to her, "Yeah. Just don't wake her up…she might kill you."_

_"Hell, she'll probably know it was you even if you don't wake her up, Yuffie," Reeve adds._

_Ha ha! Do it now! I dare you._

_She smirks, "Yeah, you're right…and then I can blame it on Cloud, since he never thanked me."_

_Bitch._

_I growl, verbally, and she snorts, "Th…" I hate you I hate you I hate you, "th-tha-nk…s."_

_She grins, beaming, "Very good Cloud!" and tosses the razor carelessly over her shoulder, "Won't be needing that anymore!"_

_They're all against me, I swear._

_"Alright you guys," Marlene's sing song voice interrupts the party, "It's cake time!"_

_Tifa comes out of the kitchen, carrying a small, circular cake precariously, a big '2' and '4' candles burning brightly. Someone hit the lights, and Tifa places the cake on the table._

_"Sing, please," Tifa smiles, before starting herself, "Happy birthday to you…_

_"Happy birthday to you…Happy birthday dear Cloud—_

_"Spike—_

_"Demon blonde—_

_"Blue streak—_

_"Chocobo head—_

_Okay, that last one was entirely too long for that one little phrase._

_"Happy birthday to you," the last line is shaky, and full of laughter._

_You guys suck._

_"Make a wish, Cloud," Tifa smiles at me, glowing in the candle light._

_I smirk, before blowing out the candles._

_Done._

_Tifa removes the candles, handing me a fork._

_"Um…"_

_"Well…not everyone likes this kind of cake," she smiles, as I take the fork hesitantly._

_"Um…" _

_"What kind of cake is it?" Yuffie asks as I dig a healthy chunk out._

_I take a bite. _

_Oh…oh euphoria._

_"It's an ice cream cake…orange sherbert."_

_She __**does**__ love me!_

_"Ew!" Yuffie squeals, "I hate orange sherbert."_

_Blasphemy! Oh who gives a damn! Look at this thing! It's beautiful! It's…it's…there's no way to explain this._

_"I didn't know they made ice cream cakes in orange sherbert," Shera remarks, as Marlene brings out another cake._

_"I know," Tifa beams, "I had to get it specially made."_

_"How?" Cid asks slowly, cutting the chocolate cake…the much less lower cake…the cake of the peasants._

_Hee! …wait, a swordsman does not say 'hee'…that's…just…wrong. Even if it is orange sherbert ice cream cake…_

_Joy._

_"..erm, I coerced them."_

_Barret raises an eyebrow, "…Coerce? You mean flirt, don't you..."_

_I drop my fork, and look up. Suddenly everyone's looking at me, and then Tifa, waiting for an answer. She flushes red._

_No…she didn't…_

_No! The cake is tainted!_

_"No," she fumbles, "I just asked, okay? The end."_

_Yeah, Barret, take her word for it. It's just cake, back off. She did it for me, anyways. _

_"Oh dude, you so totally flaunted it," Yuffie giggles._

_"Excuse me?" I ask, taking a precious pause from my now half eaten cake._

_"Well, you know…" Yuffie starts, "When you got it, flaunt it."_

_I grunt, and then Yuffie steps dramatically to the side._

_What's happening here?_

_She tips her head back and attempts to sing, "Show your assets, let them know you're proud. Your goodies you must push. Stick out your chest, shake your tush. Ven you got it, shout it out loud!"_

_"Yuffie," there's warning in Cid's voice as I stare at her._

_…no…Tifa didn't do __**that**...right?_

_Tifa pats my shoulder, "Cloud, just eat your cake…Yuffie's just confused."_

_I vaguely register Barret and Cid jumping Yuffie as she begins another verse, however I'm too enthralled at eating my cake to care._

_

* * *

_

_Oh…my stomach. Groan…I knew I shouldn't have drank all that whisky on top of that stupid cake. I can't even remember what my presents were. Did I get any presents?_

_Sherbert…how I curse you to be utterly irresistible._

_"Cloud?" Tifa's groggy voice sounds from my left, "You okay?"_

_Groan._

_She giggles, "Too much cake?"_

_"You did that on purpose."_

_She giggles again, "It was payback, for how rude you were to Reno."_

_"Please, don't mention that," I'm sick enough as it is._

_She sighs, before lying down to rest on my shoulder. My stomach makes a gurgling sound and she laughs._

_"Tifa…"_

_"Hmm?"_

_"Did…you really…"_

_She sighs, irritated, "__**NO**__, Cloud…I did not flaunt it."_

_I yawn, "…you only flaunt for me, anyways."_

_"What?" she bolts straight up._

_"Uh...I said good night, Tifa. I love you."_

_"Uh huh…and how much did you drink tonight?"_

**A/N: **Argh! Don't kill me! The fact of the matter is, is that there's a whole different opening to this chapter that I cannot obtain! Ah well...but I'm back! Gosh, I can't believe I didn't update for so long! IM SORREH! I felt bad everytime I looked at a review, especially recently...tagged with WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO UPDATE WOMAN?! Or at least, that's what I was yelling at myself this entire time. Ah well, anyways! I hope you all enjoy Cloud's birthday...it wasn't as epic as Tifa's. And there is nothing more awesome than orange sherbert ice cream...oh! And credits to _The Producers_, for Yuffie's little outburst. I love the producers...hee! Thanks for the reviews loves, and it won't be so long to the next update PROMISE!


	49. To War!

_To War!_

_"That's it! You have five seconds before I forcibly remove you from your beds!" Tifa's scolding the children…I can hear her all the way in my room, with the door closed._

_I'm thankful I have to wake up early on a regular basis, so this isn't as hard on me…the kids however…_

_"Cid will be here in approximately…" she pauses, and I know she's looking at her watch, "__**Three**__…do you hear that? Three! Minutes, and if there is one person who hates being late for anything, it's Cid! All you have to do is get up for a few minutes…just long enough to get to the airship…please guys!"_

_I move out of my room, dropping my bag outside my doorway, before continuing down the hallway to the open door of the kids' room. Cid's picking us up first, before traversing all over the planet to pick up the rest of the gang. I also understand that we'll be picking up a few of Shera' s family members. I've only met Shera's dad once, and all I remember about him was saying how 'The only good thing about that cussing air-sailor is that he's got an airship to pick us all up in...unless he crashes it...which he probably will.'. Happy guy, let me tell you._

_I peer into the room cautious, Marlene and Denzel sprawled across their beds, muttering at Tifa to go away, and five more minutes._

_It's not everyday you wake a child at five thirty in the morning. Try waking two._

_"If we're late, then everybody's late, okay guys?" Tifa's motivation speeches aren't working._

_Time to try a different tactic. I place my hand on her shoulder, and she sends me a pleading look, and I move to stand between the two beds, looking back and forth at Denzel and Marlene._

_Time to put the Strife Family Waking Technique number two to good use._

_"Alright, guys…time to get up…this is your last chance."_

_Mumble mumble mumble, blarg, go away, snort._

_Fine then…the hard way._

_"Up we go," I reach down, grabbing Denzel's arms and sling him over one shoulder, before reaching down and grabbing Marlene and slinging her over the other shoulder._

_The both cry out in indignation._

_"Cloud! Put us down!"_

_"I'm sorry…I can't hear you over the snoring," I move out of their bedroom, and down the hallway towards the bathroom._

_"I do **not **snore!" Marlene cries._

_"And we aren't even asleep!" Denzel adds as I move into the bathroom._

_I deposit them both gently into the tub, and place my hand over the knob, preparing to turn the water on and let the shower head rain out its freezing glory._

_Denzel looks up in horror, "You wouldn't dare…"_

_Oh I would, little buddy, I would._

_"No! Cloud! We're awake, we swear!" Marlene throws her hands up above her._

_I pause a moment, tapping my chin thoughtfully, before flicking my wrist ever so slightly._

_Marlene screams when the water hits her, and Denzel yelps. I cut it off quickly though, and they both glare up at me through damp bangs._

_"Wash your face, brush your teeth, change, and get your bags. Be in the bar in two minutes…understand?"_

_They both grimly nod their heads, and I move out of the bathroom._

_Tifa stares at me incredulously as I come out, both eyebrows raised in surprise._

_"…um…you've never…been that assertive before…especially with the kids. Where'd that come from?"_

_I shrug, "My mother did that to me every morning before school."_

_Tifa snorts, and clears her throat in an attempt to hide it as I narrow my eyes, "It's just…most people wouldn't admit that."_

_"I wasn't a morning person," I said coolly._

_She nods her head, frowning in that fake way that makes them think you think they understand…and that they are trying to cover up trying not to laugh, "Okay…okay…" she moves away, turning towards the stairs, before pausing, "I guess it was a good thing you were so small as a kid…it would've been a lot harder for your mom to sling you over her shoulder if not."_

_I cross my arms, "I was not tiny."_

_She barely keeps herself from cracking up, "…but you were short."_

_She's already running down the steps before she even gets the word 'short' out, and I find that there's another person that needs waking up. I chase after her quickly, and manage to catch her when she trips over her own bags waiting at the bottom of the steps. I waste no time in slinging her over my shoulder, where she once again pounds the ever lasting crap out of my back. I haul her upstairs, where the children are coming out of the bathroom door, both staring wide-eyed up at me._

_"Move."_

_They both step aside quickly at the command, eager to see Tifa get the same treatment as them._

_"Cloud! Cloud no! Cloud don't you __**dare**__ put me in that tub! Cloud!"_

_I drop her in the tub, and she crosses her arms angrily, glaring up at me. I place my hand on the shower knob._

_"Cloud…" she begins slowly, and I can already see the words forming on her lips._

_"Don't you dare say it," I narrow my eyes, the children still watching in fascination, but being completely ignored._

_She taunts me with her eyes, daring me, and I'm glowering. This could ruin my reputation…seriously. I turn the knob barely, just enough for a little bit of water to hit the tub beside her thigh. She raises an eyebrow in response._

_Shit._

_"Cloud…"_

_"Don't, Tifa."_

_She smirks, "You better not…Cloud—_

_"No, __**you**__ better not—_

_"...Maurice Strife…if you turn that knob…there will be hell to pay."_

_There's about a three second delay before both Denzel and Marlene burst into laughter. I narrow my eyes…that was a low blow…completely uncalled for._

_I send the two kids a glare, "Stay out of this."_

_That shuts them both up real quick, but a knowing smirk remains on their lips._

_I turn my head back to Tifa, where she still sits triumphant. Even if I do turn on the shower now, we're even…but not this time. Oh ho ho no, I'm so getting the best of her this time. _

_"Oh really…and what exactly will you do about it, Tifa—_

_"Oh crap—_

_"Mildred Lockhart?"_

_Another three second delay, but this time I let the children laugh. Cue evil laughter._

_The only satisfying squeak I will ever hear (as to the fact that squeaking reminds me of...shudder...Pen-Pen) is this one that's about to happen…the squeak of the knob as I shall turn it full blast! _

_"What __**are**__ ya doin?!"_

_My evil smirk falls, and we all look to the doorway. Cid's standing there, bracing himself with the doorframe, red faced and fuming._

_Crap! Not now! I've got to get my revenge! But…like Tifa said…if there's one thing that Cid hates, it's being late._

_And if I turn on this showerhead, than we will certainly be late._

_But…if I don't turn on this showerhead, than I will have tied and not won…and the exchanging of middle names cannot be left standing! There must be a victor or else Tifa will find time in the busy wedding schedule to rip me limb from limb…which she'll do anyways, but I mean...I've got to have **some **glory!  
_

_Squeaky!_

_I stare blankly at Cid as the water turns on full blast, where Tifa sits taking it not saying a word._

_"Um…we're going to be a few more minutes, Cid," I say, trying to smooth out one rough patch._

_He stares back at me, and I think he's going to lunge at my neck, but suddenly bursts into laughter. He bends at the waist, slapping his knees, and the children think it's okay to start laughing now, since they weren't the first. _

_Tifa remains quiet in the bath tub._

_Cid clears his throat, "The only reason…I'm angry…is cause ya didn't get the damn thing on tape!"_

_Damn, he's right._

_I've let my guard down, and if there's one thing you don't do around a martial artist glowering in a freezing cold shower while still dressed is let your guard down...but I do._

_It takes me a second to realize what it is squeezing my arm…and by the time I do, I'm in the shower, pulled in and landing on top of Tifa. I cringe as the water hits my back, and Cid's laughter only grows, accompanied by Denzel and Marlene._

_Damn that's cold!_

_Tifa smirks up at me triumphantly…so we are back to being tied…the battle of the middle names ended up in a tie. How anticlimactic. I smirk though, it was still a pretty damn good idea._

_Cid gives a gruff laugh, "Heh, way to go, Maurice."_

_Son of a bitch._

_"You both got five minutes…we still gotta pick up Barret, and Vincent, and Yuffie, and Nanaki…not to mention assorted family members. Shera's waitin for us all in Costa Del Sol, and we're already late enough as it is…but I'm telling ya, this is the one time I'll excuse it."_

_He ushers the kids out of the bathroom, and shuts the door behind him._

_Should I? I probably should…she hasn't said a word…and she's pretty pressed with the wedding plans and helping Shera out. It'll only get worse, too, when we get to Costa Del Sol._

_"Sorry…" I mutter, moving to stand up._

_I'm halted, though, when Tifa wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me in for a deep, soft kiss._

_Well…that was unexpected. I guess it really is true that an apology goes a long way…_

_Hmm…we should do this more often…what with the kissing the shower thing._

_Minus the freezing cold water and the being fully clothed part, though…and also the fact we need to leave in like…two minutes._

_And the fact that Cid knows my middle name…hell…that anyone knows my middle name._

_...still, somehow I get the feeling this whole 'battle' that took place here...it isn't over._

_Ah screw it…I'll deal with it later._

**A/N:** In hopes that you'll forgive me of my lack of updating...I updated super fast! So, this is the intro to the Cid and Shera's wedding chapters...and if you don't remember, this whole escapade is going to last a week...so, plenty of good time happenings, eh? **zenbon:** Yes...I am a girl, tis alright...obviously you aren't the first one to make that mistake...probably not the last, either **elebelly: **I KNOW! Producers rock! I'm a sucker for musicals, especially that one! **numbertwo** I was so totally thinking the same thing..cept, I don't think Cloud would actually say that...heh. **xxxangixxx **hello! Oh, you're too kind...and as for Let It Be? I know...scold me...I'm just trying to figure stuff out with that one...I'm so sorry to anyone whose waiting for that!

**So,** after talking to a few people, and at some suggestions, I've been thinking of holding an 'art' competition over on Deviant art. This depends on a couple things though. How many of you are over there, and how many of you would be willing to participate? I've almost thought of starting a club for Diaries over there. I like it when people draw scenes from my stories, and I'd like to keep a place where everyone could look at them. So, what do you guys think? PM me or leave a message in reviews giving me your opinion. Thanks loves! And the reviews are awesome! I LOVE YOU!


	50. Halfway Kinda Decent Good Side

_Halfway Kinda Decent Good Side_

_I'd have to say fear is the thing that's on my mind right now…there are few people who actually make me…afraid. Not the afraid as in death way, but more of…I don't know…_

_Idiotic way…_

_So, we're on the airship, and Cid is grouchy because we took too long in the shower. Marlene and Denzel found a room to crash in for the flight, and we'll be stuck on this stupid airship until this evening, __**if,**__ and that's a big if, everything goes according to plan._

_Of course, the question is, why would I experience fear? Well, I certainly don't fear Barret…I just find him annoying…which pretty much goes for the rest of our crew. They're all annoyingly annoying._

_Yes, repetitive, but if you met them, you'd feel the same way. They leave you without any imagination; they just suck your brain dry and leave you a soulless shell doomed to boredom and embarrassment. Okay, maybe that was a little harsh, but that's beside the point._

_The fact of the matter is that 'our crew' is not the only people attending this momentous occasion._

_Example one: Shera's father, Grant._

_Now, I've met the man once before, and he didn't strike me as a particularly happy person then, and he doesn't now. He's got these mammoth eyebrows; that's the only way to describe them really. And he gives the most smoldering glare, and makes you feel inferior…I swear. He's got a bum leg, too, and has to use a cane to hobble around on._

_Currently, I am subjected to his torturing scrutiny._

_Damn._

_He looks at you like a bird would; with one eye, and then the other…except, he uses his eyebrows…he raises one, then lowers it and raises the other._

_It's highly disturbing._

_I barely suppress a sigh; apparently they drive him crazy, before scanning the rapidly filling airship._

_Oh, here we go…example two: Benjamin Rollins, better known as Benny, Cid's nephew._

_He's Denzel's age, and likes to pull pranks from what I hear…but they aren't the lighthearted pranks Denzel and Marlene pull (okay, ninja-stank bomb and flying panties out of context here) they're more like evil. Surprisingly Grant has taking a liking to the kid._

_Oh yes, that's a surprise._

_Also, surprisingly, Benny looks more like Cid than his mother. I didn't know Cid had a younger sister…man, if Cid was anything like Benny I'm surprised she's still alive and sane._

_I happen to turn my eyes back towards Grant, receiving the mother of all glares._

_I swallow…don't…don't do it, Strife. Please…_

_Screw it, I can't help it, "What?" I ask._

_He narrows his eyes, obviously peeved at the fact I spoke…that or he was wrong on his assumption that I lacked the intelligence to speak…grr, evil._

_He grunts, "I'm just trying to figure out your hair."_

_I feel Tifa twitch beside of me, and she clamps down on my hand quickly before I can ball it up into a fist._

_"What…about it?" I ask carefully._

_He scratches his goatee, "It reminds me of something."_

_Tifa twitches again, trying to contain her laughter._

_She turns good naturedly towards Grant, "I always say it reminds me of a chocobo," she ruffles it lightly, "Is that right?"_

_"No," Grant snaps, before pointing at me with his cane, "Close…but I'd say it looks less like a chocobo than a chocobo's rear-end specifically."_

_Wait…wait…_

_What the hell did he just say?  
_

_Did he just __**say**__…that my __**hair**__…looks like…__**A CHOCOBO's BUTT?!**_

_A chocobo and its butt are two completely different things! And two completely different levels of insults! And that's just pushing it!_

_I feel a certain comeback filling up my lungs, and Tifa's practically convulsing right now, trying to hold in her laughter._

_"…Now—_

_But that's about as long as Tifa can hold it before she burst into laughter. My hand tightens beneath hers, and she laughs so hard she snorts, and mutters 'oh excuse me'._

_Dude! How beat up is it that my girlfriend gets a kick out my hair looking like a chocobo's butt?!_

_…wait…fiancé._

_Gonna have to get use to that one._

_I grit my teeth, and my jaw clenches._

_Relax…_

_"You should get it cut," he states, dropping his cane, not even bothering with the fact Tifa's cackling at my suffering…_

_…once again._

_"Scratch that, you need it cut," Grant says more sharply, if that's even possible._

_Tifa finally gets herself under control, "Hmm, yeah, it is getting a little long."_

_Okay change the subject, "So, Grant…what do you do for a living?"_

_Tifa gives a little scoff beside me, swallowing her laughter, after I shoot her a glare._

_She clears her throat, quickly standing, "Um…I'll leave you two to talk…I'm going to go check up on Marlene and Denzel," she smiles at Grant, "It was good to see you again, Grant."_

_"Mmm," he's __**still**__ studying me._

_I AM NOT A TEST SUBJECT._

_Stupid old man._

_"So, she your wife?"_

_"Um…no…"_

_"Girlfriend?"_

_"Recently engaged," aw shit, "But don't tell anyone…we're going to announce it at the reception."_

_"Uh huh…" He glances around slowly, "And the children?"_

_What the heck?! I asked about him, he should answer first!_

_"Erm, Marlene is our friend Barret's daughter…we're looking after her right now. We adopted Denzel a couple years back."_

_Are you done interrogating me?!_

_"Hmm…just making sure they weren't born out of wedlock…and it would've been at such a young age."_

_Obviously he doesn't know how often we get this one. It's a common misconception, really._

_"Are you going to have children?"_

_Arg! "Um…well, we haven't…really…talked about that."_

_He nods his head wisely. _

_See?! He makes you feel pathetic and incompetent! _

_"So, what do you do?" _

_"I'm…" Oh he's going to tear this right to shreds, "I'm a delivery boy."_

_Suprisingly his eyebrows raise…in approval?_

_"I can appreciate that. I was in the Wutai war unfortunately. That's how I got my knee busted up, shrapnel. There's no hope to fix something like that on a battlefield…especially when men were dying instead of crippled."_

_That…was unexpected._

_"They don't get too good of service on the PHS waves in some places around Wutai, what with the geography and what not. It was hard keeping connections up, and our side had runners to help keep up communications. I was one of 'em. I was out of commission after that, not that I mind though. Got to come home…and that war," he shook his head, "It was a terrific war…but a terrible one."_

_I blink, watching as his eyes get sort of misty. Wow…was not expecting that one._

_Then suddenly he's Grant again, snapping his head back up at me, "What about you?" he gruffly states, "You got any battle scars? Heard you fought with Sephiroth with my unfortunately soon to be son in law."_

_…that was blunt, "Yes…Tifa did too."_

_"Your girl? Well, son, you have to have some scar."_

_God, what a nosy old man._

_"Here," I tap my chest where Masamune pierced it so long ago…before…before it all, really. _

_That really was a lifetime ago._

_"Huh…what happened?" _

_"Got ran through…oh, here too more recently," I tap my right shoulder._

_He nods his head slowly, "Yeah…saw that happen a bit in Wutai, too."_

_I look up at him again, and he's glaring at me, but not with quite the intensity as before._

_Hell, have I gotten on his halfway kinda decent good side?_

_Cid walks up suddenly, cutting us off._

_A war ensues right before me. I swear, with those glares, angels dropped from the sky; tidal waves were born…I'm surprised the motor to the airship didn't flat out rot right out of us, and we didn't plummet into the ocean._

_I'm still waiting for some disaster to happen as they glare each other down, like a freak hurricane, and six tornados springing up on every continent. I mean…it should be like…raining bugs or something. Spiders, specifically…that's more gruesome. Oh, and a couple snakes, just for the heck of it._

_Finally, the silence is broken._

_"What is it, __**boy**__?"_

_Oh burn, Cid…you going to stand for that?_

_"Sorry to disturb your heart felt confessions, __**sir**__, but you're daughter, my __**fiancé**__, is on the phone," nice little insert there Cid, that's right…pour salt on the wound, it'll make it that much worse, "She'd like to speak with you."_

_Grant sighs deeply, before standing, leaning on his cane, "It was nice meeting you again, Cloud. Good luck," he states, walking away following Cid._

_It takes me a minute to realize he was referring about Tifa, and it was also only because she dropped into my lap in that second._

_"Hey," she smiled cheerfully._

_"Hi…" she's chipper, "Um…what's up?"_

_She beams, "I'm just excited, that's all. We only have to pick up Yuffie in Wutai, and Barret in Corel, and then we'll have made the full circle, and be in Costa Del Sol. I still can't believe Cid and Shera are getting married."_

_"I think Grant feels the same way."_

_She chuckles, "Hey, if we have time, we'll see if we can con Cid into flying us to the Golden Saucer one night."_

_I raise my eyebrows, "You think we'll have time for that?"_

_She shrugs, "I don't see why not…it's a celebration. Maybe we could do it for the bachelor party."_

_Oh crap I forgot about that._

_……dude…you…just…you can't…_

_She laughs at me, I guess I have a funny expression on my face, "Or not…I just really want to go. It's been awhile, huh?"_

_"Y-yeah. It has."_

_She tilts her head, "You okay?"_

_"Yeah, I'm fine."_

_She smirks, "Grant didn't rattle you that much, did he?"_

_"No…he's…actually…alright. I guess."_

_She raises her eyebrows, "Oh really, chocobo butt?"_

_"…Tifa…"_

_"Hey, you totally deserve it after that stunt you pulled," she sighs, "The kids are up, if you want to go take a nap."_

_"Will you join me?"_

_She laughs, and shakes her head, "If you think it necessary. I am tired, they were a handful this morning," she says, rubbing her eyes, "Correction…__**you**__ were a handful this morning."_

_"Hey, middle names…you brought that into the battle."_

_"You stuck me in a shower, Cloud."_

_"You called me short."_

_"Yeah, when you were a kid…we were all short then."_

_I glance off to the side, "I remember someone being freakishly tall."_

_She pokes me, "No…you were just freakishly short. I was perfect."_

_"Oh, modesty, that's a change."_

_"Oh ha ha, do you want me to sleep with you or not?"_

_Ah ha ha ha! Oh, she didn't catch that._

_"Tifa, I thought you were better than that. There are children around."_

_She frowns, before her eyes fling open, and she smacks my arm._

_Ouch._

_"You're horrible."_

_I am man…hear me roar._

_She sighs, standing, "I'm going to sleep. You can do what you want."_

_Aw, that's no fun…I follow her to the room, and we lay down on the bed, me flat on my back so she can rest her head on my chest._

_As I drift off into sleep, I hear a slight buzz. Must be a fly, but I'm too tired to care._

**A/N:** I feel a storm coming...can you guess what's gonna happen?! Ah well...so many new people reviewed this time. Leo's Katana Babe, Nisha, Miyami Amui Chan, General Dragon, Tsuyu ryu, so'mi, HIYA! (if I left anyone out, sorry...I'm a ditz)And to all the old fellas out there...hee, you're old, but I still love ya. I'm so tired, I thought summer was for relaxation. Pleh. **Nisha** have I seen you around on DA? You're name sounds familiar.

**We've **gotta couple people on board, but I'd like a few more for a commitment. I'm sure you're all talented XP!

So, after talking to a few people, and at some suggestions, I've been thinking of holding an 'art' competition over on Deviant art. This depends on a couple things though. How many of you are over there, and how many of you would be willing to participate? I've almost thought of starting a club for Diaries. I like it when people draw scenes from my stories, and I'd like to keep a place where everyone could look at them. So, what do you guys think? PM me or leave a message in reviews giving me your opinion. Thanks loves!


	51. Reverse! Reverse!

_Reverse! Reverse!_

_"Wachoo!" _

_Tifa flinches next to me, as I scratch my nose. _

_"…alright?" she mumbles, still sleepy._

_"Yeah, just need…nee-ne-n- ACHOO!" _

_Sniff._

_"Just need to blow my nose," I groan, standing up._

_"Kay."_

_She seems unperturbed. _

_Good lord, how long have we been asleep? I think I hear Yuffie's voice echoing down the hallway outside. I yawn, moving slowly into the adjoined bathroom. Sneezing is so bloody annoying. Though, it is kind of gratifying, sneezing. It's such a release when you sneeze…I mean, why else would you get pissed when someone stopped you just before that sneeze? That oh so gratifying sneeze._

_Sniff._

_They still suck though, despite redeeming qualities._

_I blow my nose, and toss the toilet paper in the trash, yawning, raising my eyes to the mirror and…_

_"AH!" Tifa screams beside of me, her hands flying up to her mouth._

_I narrow my eyes, looking towards her quickly, "What…" I ask suspiciously._

_She gasps, waving her hands and jumping up and down, "OH. MY. GOD. Oh my God! __**Cloud**__!"_

_I frown, annoyed, "What, Tifa?" _

_Honestly, what could be the problem here?_

_"What did you do to your hair?!" she screeches, before bringing her fist up to her mouth and chewing on her knuckle._

_It's a bad habit she does when she's nervous._

_I sigh, lifting my eyes to the mirror…_

_Ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit…_

_I didn't do it!_

_But I have no words…I can't speak. I can just point…point at this gaping hole in my hair. This can't be happening. This can __**not**__ be happening. What the hell is this?! It isn't…even like…I can't even explain it!_

_"Your hair has a valley, Cloud! It's a reverse Mohawk!" she rapid fires out of her mouth, before returning to chew on her knuckle._

_Finally, I find my voice, "Thank you, I'm aware," I manage to squeak out._

_It's true. Someone has buzz cut my hair straight down the middle. It is in fact a reverse Mohawk. This is wrong…this is so wrong. What the hell happened?!_

_She's staring at me with these big, wide eyes, but I don't know what to say! _

_I subconsciously run my hand through my hair, which obviously only serves to make me even more angrier, since…well, since there's freaking gaping hole in my spikes!_

_"…so I guess that's what that buzz was," Tifa mumbles offhandedly._

_I turn my shocked eyes to her, "Is that all you can say?"_

_"It's more than you!"_

_Hello! Let's focus on the problem here! My hair! This…just doesn't happen! _

_I'm panicking, and Tifa can see that, so she grabs my arms and guides me to sit down on the toilet._

_"It's okay," she soothes, "It's just hair."_

_I grab a lock of hers and dangle it in her face._

_She glares at me, narrowing her eyes, "Mine's different. It's a guy gets a buzz cut, it's manly. If a girl gets one it's freaky. Would you really like me to shave my head?"_

_I shake my head slowly._

_"So, we're okay…we'll just have to finish it," she starts fishing around in the drawers._

_"What?"_

_"Would you rather go out there like that, or with a buzzed head? Don't forget Yuffie will be joining our party soon."_

_Damn._

_"Who…"_

_Tifa shakes her head, "I don't know."_

_She's recovered quickly, lifting a razor up in one hand._

_"Are you ready?" she asks, extremely serious._

_Do I really have a choice?_

_I nod my head once, and she clicks the razor on, the familiar buzz filling the small bathroom._

_She leans in close, slowly lowering the razor, and the carnage commences._

_

* * *

_

_I exit the small bedroom a changed man._

_My __**hair**__…is __**gone**__. Buzzed so short it leaves an oh so fuzzy sensation when you rub your hand across it. For this reason, Tifa has lowered my now fuzzy wuzzy head to her cheek on several occasions to rub it._

_"At least it feels nice," she smiles._

_I stare._

_And she looks away._

_Awkward moment._

_We move down the hallway, back towards the crowd, but Tifa grabs my hand and stops me._

_"Cloud, before you go in there…"_

_And that's when I see __**him**__. And I know it's __**him**__ because I can see blonde flecks of what was once spiky hair on his blue t-shirt. That little devil spawn that looks oh so much like his uncle._

_Benny._

_I practically hiss the word, and Tifa blinks, cutting short suddenly._

_Apparently someone took Grandpa Grant's advise a bit to seriously._

_And as an excuse to completely mess with my freaking HEAD! Literally!_

_The boy freezes, looking up at me, a sudden grin cracking his face and falling in all of about three seconds._

_Doom, boy…doom._

_And he's running, and I'm running, and Tifa's shouting something about…well, who gives a damn at this point. The boy is mine._

_Damn, I wish I had that razor._

_He runs through the doorway at the end of the hall…lots of laughter and talking, and surprised shouts, but I keep going like the fool I am._

_I burst through the door, eyes wild, nostrils flared (they have a tendancy to do that when I'm angry), and muscles tense. My jaw is clenched tightly as I search the room, but there's something completely wrong with this picture._

_Everyone is dead silent, not moving…like some kind of freaky 3-D picture._

_And they're __**all**__ staring at me._

_Yuffie's jaw is hanging open, a disgruntled Reeve beside her, whose hand was frozen behind her head, obviously in keen position to smack her. Marlene is on Barret's knee jaws gapping as well. Denzel's with Nanaki, and Vincent, hell __**Vincent**__ is staring at me with open shock. Granted, his jaw isn't open, but Vincent is displaying this emotion openly in public._

_And the list goes on and on._

_There's a shattering sound to my right as Cid drops his tea cup, and that sort of breaks the spell. Someone pressed play._

_"Where's the boy?" I ask._

_Reeve smacks the back of Yuffie's head._

_"Ow! What the hell?" she shoots her eyes at Reeve, then looks at me, "What the hell?!" she gestures wildly…at me._

_"Boy. Now." I've resulted to Neanderthal speak. _

_"No. What the hell?! Now!" Yuffie sputters._

_I narrow my eyes, and Tifa rushes in behind me, clutching my arm to keep me in place._

_"They won't believe you," she leans into my ear, whispering fertively._

_"What?" I turn on her._

_"They won't believe you, not Cid's family, and certainly not Grant. Now is not the time, you have no proof."_

_"The boy has no alibi. I take him now."_

_"Cloud! He's a ten-year old boy for goodness sakes! Are you that conceited and vain to think that you can't survive without your spikes?!" she whispers, yet somehow manages to scold me._

_I feel my face burn._

_"No," I reply hotly._

_It's a matter of pride._

_"Lover's spat."_

_"Yuffie!" Tifa hisses, before turning back to me, "Listen…just…leave it. No harm done, right? It's okay…you needed a trim anyways."_

_"I didn't want to go bald." Anger anger anger._

_"I know, just…try…try and understand?" she asks, "You can't win this battle."_

_"I'll win the war."_

_"Okay, Cloud, okay."_

_Tifa sighs deeply, turning her eyes out to the crowd, still staring in open shock. _

_"What are you all staring at?" she bites vehemently towards them._

_"Nothing, nothing," comes the ashamed, scattered replies._

_Everyone quickly shuffles around awkwardly as Tifa cracks her knuckles. She grips my hand tightly in her own, before towing me over towards Yuffie and Reeve._

_Yuffie at least (surprisingly) has enough presence of mind to stare at Tifa. Reeve still stares at my now non-existent hair._

_"So…what's up?" Yuffie asks nervously, her eyes flicking towards me every couple seconds._

_Reeve blinks, "Your…hair…is…gone."_

_I glance at Tifa, "Can I punch him?"_

_She grips my arm tighter as Reeve flinches, "Cloud…please…calm down," she turns her attention to Yuffie, "I fell asleep with gum in my mouth, and it got stuck in Cloud's hair."_

_"Exactly what position were you in for this to happen?" Yuffie asks._

_"It doesn't matter," Tifa rolls her eyes, "I'm going to spread the word. Behave…all of you."_

_Tifa moves away quickly, trying to contain the problem before it spreads._

_"What the hell happened?" Barret hisses as he walks up._

_"Yeah, that was a load of bull—_

_"—shit right there, wasn't it?" Cid finishes Yuffie's sentence._

_"The boy," I say._

_"Benny," Cid gruffly mumbles._

_"You knew?"_

_"No…well…Benny…well, he's Benny."_

_"Benny is dead," I reply._

_"Cloud," Cid says slowly, "He's family."_

_"So was his hair!" Yuffie shouts, rubbing my fuzzy head, "Oh…soft."_

_I slap her hand away, "Yeah, what about my hair? What are you going to do about it Cid?"_

_He shrugs, "Nothin…ain't my kid," he scratches his chin, "I'm just ashamed I didn't think of it first."_

_Yuffie giggles and I send her a silencing glare._

_"But seriously," Cid grunts, "This doesn't seem like Benny's work…he's usually more creative than this."_

_…yeah…not going there._

_"Anyways, we've got about a half hour till we land, so get ready," Cid says._

_I sigh, shaking my head slowly. At least my hair grows quickly._

_"Hey," there's a soft voice to the left, "What's this?"_

_We all look over, glancing at Tifa whose picked something up off the ground._

_She stares at it…it looks like a Polaroid. She frowns, and then her eyes go wide, before she frantically searches the floor for more._

_Yuffie narrows her eyes, spotting one on the ground and picking it up. She flips it right side up, and lets out a snort, a couple words escaping. She quickly tries to mask it, but I already heard what she said._

_"Reverse Mohawk."_

_I narrow my eyes, wrenching the picture from her hand._

_…you've got to be freaking kidding me._

_Suddenly, the former members of the once great AVALANCHE have been reduced to scrambling around on their knees on the floor of an airship, trying to salvage all the pictures before anyone sees._

_I vaguely register Benny being dragged off by his mother, his ear pinched between her thumb and forefinger._

_Yuffie hisses at me, "We'll get **real **revenge this week, don't you worry."_

_I can only begin to imagine what she'll dream up._

_I glance around the room, watching as each of my friends decline help from Cid's family members, and Shera's, trying to salvage what's left of my pride._

_…huh…who would've thought these guys would've done this for me?_

_…that still doesn't fix the fact that this whole thing freaking sucked._

_Or the fact that they'll probably keep all the pictures for future humiliation._

_Bastards._

**A/N: **hehehehe, hope you liked the chapter. To anyone whose curious for more shaving head experiences, you should definately check out Galaxia Alpha's _There are three words in i love you_ or something like that...hell, anything by Galaxia. Course, the reverse mohawk was not inspired by that...that was actually a hairdo that me and my bud talked about once...XD so great. HOLY CRAP...did you know this story has gotten over 100,000 views?! THAT IS CRAZEH. So I want to thank you all for the views/alerts/favs/reviews. YOU MAKE MY DAy...hee...

Anyways, click it in teh profile for all those interested in a DevArt club...it's so sad right now! IT NEEDS YOUR HELP. Help it! Lurve ya!


	52. Eye Candy

_Eye Candy_

_"Wow…I didn't realize there were so many people on the airship until now," Yuffie says, leaning on the railing._

_Currently Yuffie and I are standing behind the safety of a railing of the outside deck watching the mass exodus of the airship. _

_I nod in agreement dreading the actuality that all of these people will be at this wedding. It's sheer insanity._

_"Oh look, there's Grant," Yuffie points him out in the crowd._

_"I think that's Shera's sister beside of him—_

_"Ehmagawd…who are __**they**__?" Yuffie cries, pointing to a small cluster of guys near Grant._

_I study the four guys, "I think they're Shera's brothers."_

_Yuffie's jaw drops, "Shera has brothers?!"_

_I nod my head._

_"Four brothers?!"_

_"I think there may be a set of twins."_

_"__**Twins**__?!" she cries._

_I blink, glancing at her. I forgot how annoying she could be._

_"What's the big deal?"_

_"Cloud," she leans on my shoulder, "See all those boys down there? Shera's brothers? They're like…the epitome of a perfect male specimen."_

_Oh my God._

_"And you're telling me," she taps her chest, "That there are two down there that look exactly a like? I mean, look at their bone structure. Oh wow. That one down there on the far left has got a green eye and a brown eye. Sexy!"_

_"You can see that from here?"_

_She ignores the question, "Quick, Cloud…give me some ages!"_

_"Uh…I think the oldest is twenty five, and the youngest is eighteen—_

_"Oh sweet…I can not wait to get down there. It's like a meat market, except they're men. Gawd, who would've thought Shera's family, was a hawt hunk of male mass?"_

_I have got to end this conversation, but I can't help but ask._

_"You're going to...date Shera's brothers…? You do realize that they'll soon be Cid's brothers."_

_"Oh crap, that's right…and anyways," she sneers, "Who said anything about dating?"_

_I sigh, turning my head away._

_"Oh come on Cloud! Weddings are like the ultimate way to hook up with people…you can always— Oh wait, you can't…you're taken."_

_"Happily, thank you."_

_She scoffs, turning once again to gaze at the 'hawt hunk of male mass'…that just sounds plain wrong. I shudder involuntarily. I thought guys were suppose to be the one all about the body…aren't girls suppose to be looking for lasting relationships?_

_"Hey Spike—oh…right…never mind."_

_Dammit!_

_I turn, sending Barret a withering glare. He holds up his hands in defense._

_"Hey, it slipped…sorry man."_

_"Oh quit moping, Cloud," Yuffie's still spying on Shera's brothers._

_Where'd she get those binoculars from?_

_"Your hair will grow back fast enough…if you want I can look around for a herb shop and make you up a Wutai concoction specifically designed for faster hair growth."_

_Barret and I look at each other, confused. Why the heck does she know a Wutai concoction specifically designed for faster hair growth?_

_Barret sighs, "Yuffie…why do you know—_

_"It's for a friend," she shrugs._

_"Cid?" Barret asks._

_"Cid is going bald?"_

_"Shh! Don't let anyone know!" Yuffie suddenly turns on us, "He'll kill me. And it's not even like it is significant loss or anything."_

_"Any hair loss for a man is significant," Barret replies._

_"Yeah, that was proven with Cloud's little accident," Yuffie says turning her attention back to Shera's brothers._

_Okay, first off...it wasn't an accident. No way in hell. Secondly, she's an animal…a dog…ha ha. You can make that connection yourself._

_Barret frowns, "What are you two doing up here anyways?"_

_I glance over my shoulder at Barret, "Yuffie's checking out the goods."_

_"What?"_

_Yuffie wiggles her hips, "I'm going to have so much fun this week," she says in a sing-song voice._

_"Oh…oh man! I did not need to know that, dammit. I'm going to go find Marlene."_

_"Warn them," I call over my shoulder at Barret._

_Surprisingly Yuffie agrees, "Oh yes! So that way, they'll try to resist my irresistible charm and fail miserably! Ha ha! Oh this is going to be a great week."_

_"I'm leaving—_

_"You're no fun," Yuffie pouts, "But don't worry! I've already got Operation Dye planned up."_

_"Die?" I asked, perplexed._

_"No, dye…never mind. You'll have your revenge yet, though."_

_Benny, "Yeah, just don't kill anyone."_

_"Well, duh! How would they suffer if they're dead?"_

_Now would be a good time to leave, "Bye."_

_"Hey, Cloud!"_

_Or not._

_I see Tifa walking across the deck, smiling warmly. However, my attention is focused elsewhere from her adoring face._

_"Biki…"_

_"What?" Yuffie asks, annoyed._

_I can barely keep myself from pointing, "Biki…"_

_"What?" Yuffie turns and glances, taking precious time from her binoculars._

_She smiles when she spots Tifa, "Oh," she grins mischievously, "Eyes up, buddy," she returns to her spying, "It's not like you've never seen her naked before anyways."_

_Man, she's blunt today…I don't even have half a mind to defend that claim, but still! This is different though! This is Tifa in a bikini!_

_"If this is the way you act right now, I can't wait to see what you'll be like when she takes off those shorts and you see the bottom half; speaking of 'checking out the goods'. Wipe your drool away, Romeo. It may look good on the two year old, but it just isn't flying with you."_

_Shut up!_

_"Have you ever seen her in a bikini before?"_

_I shake my head no. Trust me, if I'd had seen her like **this** before, then I would've remembered. It would've been stored in my head with the other 'Cloud's special moment's never to be forgotten'. Anyone have a camera? _

_"Hey," Tifa beams up at me, "What're you two up to?"_

_"Checking out the goods," Yuffie replies holding out her binoculars, "Here girl, you've got to take a looksie."_

_What?! No, my girlfriend has me! Erm, fiancé! Bitch! _

_Tifa takes them, "Holy crap…does that guy have a green eye and a brown eye?"_

_"Unique, eh?"_

_"Huh…those are Shera's brothers, right? Nice choice—Hey!"_

_I grab the binoculars, passing them off to Yuffie. Tifa gives me a perplexed look and I shrug._

_"Oh! Jealousy!" _

_Yuffie sucks._

_Tifa smiles, "Aw, Cloud! You aren't jealous, are you?" she pokes me in the side._

_I roll my eyes away, and cross my arms. I'm really not having this conversation with these two. How many guys sit there and watch their fiancé stare through binoculars at four male siblings that are apparently good looking?_

_"Oh he's totally jealous," Yuffie snickers._

_I'm about to walk away, but Tifa wraps her arms around me and stares up at me. She's in a really good mood, I can tell…else she probably wouldn't have gazed through the binoculars at Yuffie's targets. Or at least, I'm hoping she wouldn't…_

_Man this day sucks._

_But she is hugging me in a bikini, so she's pretty much forgiven and absolved of sins, but…she doesn't have to know that._

_Tifa reaches up, rubbing the top of my head, "Oh…I think your hair's already grown a bit more."_

_Yuffie laughs, "Yeah, you're still a blondie. The fuzz even reflects in the sunlight."_

_I glare at Yuffie over the top of Tifa's head, and she sticks her tongue out in retaliation._

_"What are you doing in a bikini anyways, Tifa?" Yuffie asks, back to spying._

_"Oh, I changed earlier and was sunbathing out on the deck. I knew it'd take forever for all these people to get settled, so, I put the time to good use," she turns her attention to me, "We need to go to the hotel soon, and get our room. Denzel and Marlene are with Barret. I think he said he'd share a room with them."_

_"So, it'll be us two?"_

_Tifa grins, "Uh huh."_

_Score! _

_"Pervert…" Yuffie mumbles under her breath._

_I glare at her over Tifa's head again, and Yuffie flips me the bird. Man I hate her._

_I place my hand on Tifa's back to begin to lead her away, "Later, Yuffie."_

_Tifa smiles at Yuffie over her shoulder as we walk across the empty deck, "Enjoy the show, Yuffs."_

_"Oh I will…you too, Cloud…you enjoy your show too," Yuffie laughs, going back to her binoculars._

_I rub my eyes with my free hand, and I feel Tifa press up against me, reminding me of the thin fabric that separates us._

_"What did she mean by that?"_

**A/N: **I realized something today. My wordcount on Word is different from this one...ah well. I need sleep...I had fun on my camping trip, but now its beddy bye. Enjoy.


	53. Hairspray

_Hairspray_

_"Welcome to the Dolphin's Tail Spa and Resort," the man behind the desk smiles brightly._

_Tifa smiles back, "Hi…we're here for the Highwind wedding party."_

_Dolphin Tail? Who the heck names a resort after the name of an animal, and not even a name of an animal…a __**body part**__, specifically being that of a tail? I mean, I don't know about you guys, but I do not find the phrase Dolphin tail refreshing or spa worthy._

_…Not that I'm going to the spa in the first place, but I'm thinking of Tifa here…Tifa who has unfortunately resorted to a thin, white button up shirt over her bikini. Well, I guess it's better than having random guys gawk at my girl's chest. Mine. Back off._

_"And the happy couple's name?" he grins brightly._

_"Strife," Tifa grins._

_The man types in something on the computer, "Ah yes, here we are. Your room is suite 403…it's a beachfront."_

_Tifa grins again "Thanks."_

_"And here are your keys, and a brochure on all the lovely things our spa and resort offer here."_

_Man he is too…giddy. Floppy wrist._

_"You just need to sign here," he hands over a sheet of paper, and a pen._

_Tifa grabs it and elbows me in the gut "Sign, Cloud."_

_I stare at her, and she sighs, "Because Cloud, it's your name, not mine."_

_Right. I take the pen from her and sign it quickly, and Tifa hands the paper back over to the man. __Thing._

_"Oh! Let me see that ring, darling," he cries, spotting Tifa's ring._

_She holds her hand out and he takes it, staring at the ring. Any other time I'd be bothered by a man holding Tifa's hand, but something tells me he isn't much of a threat._

_Or to be clearer, is playing for the other team._

_"Oh honey…you know, I was a little thrown off by the bald thing, but obviously he has good taste."_

_You freaking bastard._

_Tifa laughs, "Oh, it was an accident. He really does have the nicest hair."_

_"Yes, I can tell he's a blonde…how long does he wear it? Personally I find it hard to style my hair…I can't find a good styling gel."_

_"Oh," Tifa reaches into her purse, pulling out her wallet, "I have a picture of his hair…take a look, you won't believe it."_

_Holy crap! What?! Stop talking to this man about my hair! It's really starting to freak me out here!_

_The man looks at the picture incredulously, "Oh my Gawd…look at those locks."_

_Someone save me…please._

_"He never has split ends either…I don't know how he keeps his hair so healthy. He uses generic shampoo and everything," Tifa says._

_The man looks at me, "What kind of styling gel do you use?"_

_He's genuine in the question, but I can't help it…I'm so pissed off right now and uncomfortable on about twelve different levels._

_I glare at him, "I don't."_

_To most people, this glare would've shut him up for good...however, he's a little persistant._

_He gasps, "It's natural?! No way, honey…that can't be true!"_

_Tifa giggles, "It is…been that way since he was a kid."_

_The man hands back the picture, "See, now that it is darling. It's very rare you see childhood couples make it this far."_

_Find a happy place…find a happy place…find a happy place._

_God I want Bikini Tifa back._

_Tifa agrees expressively, "Isn't it true, though? It's so hard to stay in touch with people now a day."_

_"I know, sweetie…I can't tell you the last time I went out on a date. It's so hard to find a good man," he leans in close, as if I can't hear him, "Is he…?"_

_"Oh, yes," Tifa smiles brightly, "He's a pretty good guy."_

_Aw, thank you._

_"He has his faults,"_

_Alright you can stop now._

_"But everyone does."_

_The man leans in on the counter, "So true…so are you two married yet or just engaged?"_

_"Engaged," Tifa replies, "We're planning on announcing it at our friends' wedding reception. Well, at least sometime this week."_

_"That's wonderful! I love weddings, they're so great."_

_"I agree."_

_It's like listening to girl talk except one of them isn't a GIRL. Damn, I need an escape! Why isn't it busier? This dude needs to do his job, not gossip all day._

_I sigh, turning to see Cid walking towards us._

_He reaches us quickly, a bottle clutched in his hand, "Hey, having problems with the room?"_

_"No."_

_He narrows his eyes, "Then why are you still over here?"_

_I turn my head slightly, trying to listen in on where their conversation has taken them._

_"—you read that book? Wasn't it tragic though," Tifa coos._

_"Oh, I know dear…both lovers died at the end…it was so sad, I almost cried. When I saw the movie though, I __**did**__ cry…just something about it really touched me. Have you seen the movie too?"_

_I look back at Cid, seeing him stare past me, stunned at the two apparently now friends conversing._

_He looks back at me, "Oh…that's why," he shakes his head, as if to clear his mind, "Make sure he doesn't come to the wedding."_

_"Right."_

_"Here," Cid holds out the bottle._

_I frown, taking it. It's made of blue glass, and I lift the top, catching a whiff of strawberries and bananas._

_"…Cid...?"_

_He leans in, whispering, "I would've given it to you sooner, but…it's kind of secret…the whole hair thing. I mean, with me…obviously not with you."_

_I glare at him, "What?"  
_

_"It's this stuff I made Yuffie make up for me. It really works, Cloud, I swear, damnit. I think you need it more than I do, anyways."_

_"…It smells like strawberries—_

_"Would you rather be bald you little pansy? Man, you're one conceited son of a—_

_"Alright, thanks Cid."_

_"Yeah, right, whatever," his eyes move past me again, "You sure he isn't moving in on your woman? You know I heard that's the new tactic with some younger guys. Pretend they're…well, that way, and then bam! Hallelujah they've seen the light and go for the girl. They do that just to get close to 'em."_

_I glance over my shoulder, catching sight of the man, "Yeah…I'm not really too concerned about it," I turn back to Cid, "Oh, and you might want to hide Shera's brothers."_

_Cid's eyes widen, then narrow, "Shit…I knew I forgot something."_

_"So you knew…Yuffie…?"_

_"Are you crazy? Of course I knew she'd be freaking out all over them. I swear, she's like a freaking vulture! I tell you, never go anywhere with that little siren. I __**witnessed**__ it, and I still don't know how these men fall for it! It's insanity! If that's what our future men are, well, we're screwed!"_

_"So…um, how do I…or how much do I put—_

_"Man, just go ahead and dump the whole bottle on your head…seriously, see that bathroom over there? Hop to it. I mean, obviously, these two little best friends will be fine without you for a minute. Just rub it on, and wait."_

_"How…fast does it work?"_

_Cid laughs, and walks off. I stare at the bottle, and glance at Tifa and…her new found friend._

_Dammit._

_I take off for the bathroom Cid had pointed to, and walk in. I head over to the sinks, and take the top off again. I sniff it, a little dubious about the strawberry and banana mix, but sigh._

_I know it hasn't been long, but I miss my hair…but if this works, I'll owe Yuffie thanks._

_Dammit._

_"Hey man, there isn't much to style."_

_I glare over my shoulder at the offending guy, and he holds up his hands, "Sorry."_

_I wait for him to leave before dumping the contents of the bottle onto my head. Cold cold cold!_

_I shake my head, and stare up at the mirror._

_I have a wet head…and no hair._

_This was pointless. I chuck the bottle into the trash and head outside the bathroom. I pause to get something to drink, seeing Tifa still talking. I kill sometime outside, grabbing up our bags from Cid so when we actually finally go to our room, we'll have them. I drag them inside to the desk, and drop them beside Tifa._

_The man looks up, "…Ehmahgawd."_

_Tifa turns and gasps "Hair! You have hair!"_

_I have…hair! I have hair! Sweet day it's true! I have hair again! Granted, it's not very long…I can tell by running my fingers through it, its only about two inches long, but dammit that's two more inches closer to normal than ten minutes ago._

_Yes! _

_Tifa reaches up and hugs my head, running her hands through it, "How…?"_

_"Some hair tonic stuff…I got it from Cid, who got it from Yuffie."_

_Tifa stares up incredulously at me, "You…put something on your head that came from Yuffie?"_

_I shrug, "It was a risk I was willing to take."_

_She turns back to the man, "Look, Cecil. He has hair!"_

_"I know! Oh it will be a good week," he beams, and then frowns, "Man, looks like a rush is coming in. Come and visit me anytime Tifa dear! I'll send the bellhop for your bags. You two can go on up."_

_She grasps his hand once, "Thanks, Cecil!"_

_Cecil? _

_She grabs my hand and pulls me to the elevator. I glance over my shoulder, spotting someone in the crowd._

_…It'd be a shame for Tifa to lose a friend so fast…I really hope Cecil doesn't ask Vincent how he styles his hair._

**A/N:** In honor of Hairspray...I love musicals, and the original version of it. I wonder if the new one will be any good? I gave the summary an update too. It needed a little spice. Cecil is officialy the greatest OC ever. I love him. I can't imagine what Vincent would do if anyone ever asked him about his long lustrous locks. Thanks for reviews loves!


	54. Sandy Thoughts

_Sandy Thoughts_

_I've been thinking…yeah, I know, shocker._

_But I have been thinking, about a lot of things these past couple of hours. I don't know if it's the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, or the skin-numbing sun beating down, or the fact that Bikini Tifa is no longer in my line of vision, but at least one of these things has triggered the inevitable flow of thoughts._

_Damn you stupid sun, putting me in a contemplative mood. How is it that I can never really relax? I mean, I know Tifa is; she fell asleep about twenty minutes ago. But I can't…instead I have to think._

_I've done a lot of thinking for a man my age…I mean, I've been through a lot. Sometimes, it's easy to forget the things I've done, and have had done to me. Sometimes…it isn't. Sometimes they hit me out of the blue, a random object triggering an onslaught of memories. Lately though, they've been better memories, things that have happened as of the recently. Sure, some of them are kind of sucky (kilts) but, they're better than other memories._

_I remember when I was a kid, my mom would talk about saving up to go on a vacation to Costa del Sol. She never made it, as far as my knowledge goes. I don't know if she ever went to Costa del Sol in her life, and it was one of her dreams. I sometimes think part of my reasons for leaving her, was to make our dreams come true…that…that somehow through SOLDIER I could get her to Costa del Sol, that I could make her happy, and take her from a town that forsook her. I wonder sometimes, if my mother really actually did anything to get the treatment that she did… I know that parents aren't saints that we make them out to be as a child. I know that now, because I'm faced today with being a parent (or something like that) and I know I'm not perfect, nor am I sinless._

_I almost smirk, because it's thoughts like this that a year ago that would've driven me to Aeris' church. I know Tifa thought I spent my time there just because it was Aeris' place, but it wasn't just that. I mean, it was part of that, but it was also the fact that the church is just so out of place in Migar's ruins as it was when Midgar was still standing. It kind of felt right to be the outcast man in the outcast building…the building already damaged when I first arrived there…the building with flowers…the building that actually gave peace in a city full of hate and sin. _

_Still, I can't help but think how I possibly left what I had going for me sometimes. I understand the reasons behind it, and I don't…I think my brain and my heart like to fight._

_'Someone's being sentimental today,' she says in a sing song voice._

_Hey, I'm really just a big softy on the inside. You just have to get past the iron clad walls._

_But that's a toughie. Grr. _

_'Please. You know, I've heard the phrase Bikini Tifa today more times than I care to count…really friend, I know she's…well…I know she's…well...she's...well...'_

_Zack…you might want to watch what you say._

_'Oh, Aeris just knows I'm flattering your girlfriend.'_

_'Fiancé, and I think he wasn't talking about me. I think he was talking about himself.'_

_Bikini Tifa…joy._

_I can't help but glance over, spotting the darkened image of Tifa stretched out on her towel from beneath my sunglasses._

_'I hope you get raccoon lines.'_

_What?_

_'You know, tan lines of your sunglasses. You'll get this crazy ass white line across your eyes…it'll be freaking hilarious. I mean, since you aren't bald anymore, the wedding pictures have to be embarrassing someway.'_

_I'm wearing a freaking kilt. How much more embarrassed are we talking here?_

_'Oh, but that's just the price to pay.'_

_Pay what?_

_'Why, the meeting of Bikini Tifa of course.'_

_My eyes travel back over to Tifa…dammit he's right._

_I take off my sunglasses, and sit up slowly, careful not to disturb Tifa._

_'What are you doing?'_

_That reminds me…_

_I reach over, digging through my pants I wore out to the beach. I rummage through my pockets a bit before finally finding what I'm looking for. I pull out my cell phone, and flip it open, scrolling through my options._

_'What is he doing?'_

_'Hmm…he's a genius, that's what he's doing.'_

_'What? Wait, did he make a song out of Bikini Tifa? Is he singing a Bikini Tifa song? Man, I'm glad she can't read his mind.'_

_Ah, here we are. Okay, let me line her up._

_Oh wow, perfect. She's got her head lolled off to the side a bit, lounging luxuriously in her white bikini._

_Sweet!_

_I press the button on my phone, and I now have a new wallpaper. Forever shall I have Bikini Tifa with me. It is a glorious day indeed._

_'I told you…genius. He's having dirty thoughts…__**sandy**__ thoughts.'_

_'You two are such pigs.'_

_We're men…it's how we function on a day to day basis._

_'You know…marriage is more than bikinis.'_

_'How would you know? You've never been married.'_

_Aeris sighs, 'It's just something for you to think about.'_

_I know…okay…I know marriage is a big responsibility, but I think we can handle it. I mean, granted life hasn't been that serious lately…or at least, the level of serious I think we've become accustomed to. I mean, think about it…we have been living a rather easy life. Sure, we work hard, but…it's almost normal. It's strange, weird, but it's a normal life. If we've done all the things we've done together, I think we'll be okay with marriage. I think we can handle it…definitely._

_'You just destroyed your man moment.'_

_You know what? I don't give a damn, porcupine ass—_

_"Cloud?"_

_I start, glancing down at Tifa._

_Yes, Tifa…she isn't Bikini Tifa…she isn't my fiancé…she isn't my love; she isn't the woman I live with and adore._

_She's all of those…and it's…normal. It's strange, but it's normal for a man to love a woman._

_'Now __**that**__ was a man moment," Aeris says proudly._

_"Cloud, what's wrong?" Tifa sits up, leaning close to my face._

_"Er…"_

_She tilts her head, smiling in confusion, "You're just staring…why'd you take off your sunglasses?"_

_"Er…Raccoon lines."_

_She giggles, "Right," then her eyes widen, "Oh! I've got a surprise for you."_

_I raise an eyebrow, watching with interest as she scrambles to dig into her bag she brought out with us._

_She rummages around, "Close your eyes."_

_I begin to ask why but she cuts me off, "Just do it! It's a surprise!"_

_I sigh, and comply, listening to her rustle around some more. It's another few seconds and she giggles and says, "Okay…open them."_

_Good lord, it's better than Bikini Tifa._

_It's Tifa in a blue dress; one that hugs her hips, and flares out around her knees…Tifa with a big, white sunhat, and no shoes, standing in the sand on Costa del Sol._

_God, it's Tifa in a blue dress._

_Before I realize it, I reach out, grabbing her hip and pull her down. She lands on top of me in the soft sand, and her big, floppy hat blocks out the world as I kiss her._

_She giggles, muffled up against my lips, "Geez…if I'd known I'd get this reaction, I'd have gotten this sooner."_

_I smile against her lips, feeling her hands reach around to find mine. Her fingers close over my phone softly (crap) and she pulls back, lifting up my phone._

_"Why'd you have your phone out?"_

_"Uh…" I reach out to stop her, but she flips it open._

_I watch as her jaw drops, and she turns red. Crap! I turn my head away, averting my eyes, waiting for the scolding._

_Instead, she falls up against my chest, knocking me back into the sand. Her dress is soft, smooth, and my hands slide across it easily._

_"Ya know," she says, pillowing her head on my chest and running her hand through my restored hair, "I think you need a trim, chocobo butt."_

**A/N: **Good times. I'm glad everyone aproved of Cecil XD. This was a quick update, a little short, but I think it's such a cute chappie. I want to thank you ALL so much for reading this story. We've passed teh 900 mark, and I'm so happy everyone enjoys reading this as much as I enjoy writing it. It was a rough night (I fear a friend will be in deep trouble for lying) but I managed to squeeze this out...and yes, Cloud's hair saga is over. Short, but oh so sweet. I love you all! I hope everyone who's ever read this sticks around to the end...it'll be a while though, so I hope you're all in for the long haul.

I love you!

Teh Horkster


	55. Lord of the Dance

_Lord of the Dance_

_"…and one two three four, one two three four. Come on people! All eyes will be on __**you**__! Each step, each angle of your pinky toe must __**be right**__! There is no room for error! No room for mistakes! The happily married couple's first dance must be perfect, and you guys still can't come in on the right time! They have to dance for the first song, and then twelve counts into the second is when you come in! Work with me!"_

_God I'm going to kill Cecil. No pressure, right? You've just got to dance, and it's not that complex because we aren't allowed to overshadow the happily married couple._

_Only one problem: I can't freaking dance. It's like…impossible, and I cannot see the freaking purpose in dancing. At all…none…what so ever._

_Torture…pure torture._

_"Ow!" Tifa hisses._

_…maybe it's more torture for Tifa since she's my partner and her feet have just been subjected to being shattered. Again. Her poor toes are exposed since all the women decided to practice in their heels, a punishment cruel enough in itself._

_"Sorry," I mumble, keeping my voice low._

_"__**Strife**__!"_

_Damn that man! One minute he's oozing gushy feelings to Tifa and the next he's a freaking dance boot camp instructor! DAMN HIM._

_I don't even say anything; just turn my eyes grudgingly to Cecil._

_"What is that? The twenty eighth time you've crushed poor Tifikins toes?"_

_Tifikins? Tifikins? What the hell!  
_

_"Thirty second," Cid says from somewhere on the side._

_Bastard getting to sit out whenever he wants to! Course, I guess paying for the bill helps him to rule Cecil._

_I hate this man._

_"It can't be that hard, Strife. All you have to do is move your feet!"_

_Yuffie snickers. God, poor Vincent, I think Cid purposely stuck her with him just to drive him absolutely mad. Well, I guess if Yuffie ever gets to bad he can always stab her ankles with his shoes._

_Barret on the other hand is in an even more awkward situation with Shera's younger sister. And coincidentally __**tiny **__sister. She's like a mini Shera, except she's realllly mini, so it's sort of off set by the massiveness of Barret. _

_Course, Cid's older sister is stuck dancing with Shera's little brother, which happens to be one of the twins which also happens to be one of Yuffie's targets. So, when Cid's sister is looking around, and Shera's brother is innocently moseying along, Yuffie sends him these…looks. He's turned about seven different shades of red in the past five minutes._

_Oh look, he's purple._

_"Strife!"_

_Damn you Cecil!  
_

_"What?" I ask, annoyed._

_"Err, Ce…" She's given him a nickname now too, great! "Don't worry about Cloud, I'll make sure to spend enough time with him."_

_Cecil eyes me, "Right…I'm trusting you Tifa. He's a loose cannon…you might want to wear your steel-toed boots to the dress rehearsal."_

_"Wait, dress rehearsal?" Barret asks._

_"Of course! All weddings have dress rehearsals. You'll be in your—_

_"You son of a bitch, Cid! You told me I'd only have to wear that damn kilt once!" Barret roars._

_"Oh? You're wearing kilts? How festive," Cecil says._

_"Festive my ass!" Barret shouts._

_Cid scoffs, "You have to wear it! It's a dress rehearsal!"_

_"That don' mean I have to wear a dress!" Barret shouts._

_Go Barret! You tell that crazy kilt wearing bastard!  
_

_"Oh suck it up you big pansy!" Cid shouts, "And __**you**__ Vincent! You aren't wearing those damn shoes, either!"_

_"I think I will," Vincent intones, "They protect me from Yuffie's feet."_

_"They're freaking metal!" Cid shouts._

_"He does got a point," Barret says, "She's got some damn big feet."_

_"Hey!" Yuffie screeches, "Like you've got enough to say you big oaf!"_

_"At least I'm proportional!" Barret shouts._

_"That's a big word for your vocabulary!" Yuffie bellows._

_"The fact is you aren't wearing those damn pointy shoes, Vincent! And Barret, shut your mouth! We know about Yuffie's abnormally large feet! Why do you think we had to special order her shoes?!"_

_"Hey! That's personal!" Yuffie retaliates._

_"So was my hair loss, brat but you sure didn't have a problem telling everyone else!"_

_"Bastard! I didn't tell anyone!"_

_"Oh yes you did!" Cid yells._

_Shera puts her head in her hands._

_"Goodness," Tifa mutters, "We should've never brought Shera and Cid's family here. They didn't need to know that we're like this…ignorance is bliss."_

_"We're?" I ask._

_She giggles, "You're wearing a kilt too."_

_"Last time I remember you don't have abnormally large feet."_

_Something else is abnormally large though. Heh…_

_"I heard that bastard!" Yuffie screeches._

_God she's a freaking banshee._

_Now, something happens in this moment that I wasn't aware of cause I was too busy looking at Tifa._

_But it's pretty easy to figure out what happened whilst ignoring the thorn in my side._

_"Yuffie…" Vincent says lowly._

_"Yuffie! What the hell are you doing?! Put your shoe back on!" Cid yells._

_"I'll show you abnormally large!" she shouts._

_Whack!_

_Thud._

_"Ah! Cloud!"_

_…Do you know that little pressure point on the back of your neck?_

_…Guess where that bloody shoe hit…_

_I dropped like a bloody rock._

_"Holy crap Yuffie knocked out Spike!" Barret yells._

_"With a shoe?!" Cid laughs._

_"Cloud?" Tifa asks._

_God! What the hell?! A shoe hit me in my neck! I freaking blacked out for two seconds! A shoe! A SHOE! _

_Yuffie's cackling in the background and I slowly realize that everyone in this stupid rehearsal is laughing at the fact that a shoe just took me down._

_I slowly stand up, a little light headed. Tifa puts an arm on my shoulder; she has a little grin, though._

_"You sure you okay?" she asks._

_I nod my head slowly, spotting the enormous heeled shoe on the ground._

_Payback._

_I pick it up slowly, holding it my hand. Damn, they're right. Yuffie does have huge feet._

_Yuffie's still cackling, so she doesn't realize when I turn swiftly and chuck the shoe back at her. _

_Yuffie squeaks, spotting the shoe and ducks. It hits Vincent in the chest, and he loses his balance, falls backwards and takes out Mini Shera. Barret catches her, stumbling backwards and hits Cid's sister, and the Twin. The Twin tumbles and somehow lands on top of Yuffie who wasn't there about two and a half seconds ago._

_And if that wasn't enough to take the cake, the shoe has somehow ricocheted off of Vincent and bounced off Cecil's arm, slid across the floor to timely take out the oh so helpful cane of our dear hobbling father Grant._

_Oh crap._

_And daddy Grant goes down!  
_

_"Daddy!" Shera screams, and the Twin is up, his apologizes that Yuffie had hoped he would deliver momentarily forgotten at the fact that Papa Grant is on the floor. _

_Tifa gasps, her hands flying over her mouth. Somehow she's the only one unscathed from this little battle._

_"Daddy? Daddy are you okay?"_

_Grant grunts, slowly sitting up on the floor, the Twin returning his father's cane._

_"What the bloody hell happened?" Grant asks._

_Vincent is standing slowly, a bit winded after taking a direct hit from Yuffie's shoe. Yuffie is lying dejectedly on the ground, obvious disdain at being forsaken for an old cripple man. Yes, obviously she needs the help and attention more than him. Mini Shera is blushing profusely as she untangles herself from Barret, and Cecil is rubbing his arm. _

_"Oh Daddy, one of the girls shoes…got flung off in one of the dances. It sort of left a path of carnage," Shera hastily explains._

_Grant lifts the shoe, "Damn…what's a girl wearing a shoe like this?"_

_Yuffie's head bangs on the floor loudly, but everyone's to busy watching Grant struggle to stand._

_"I'm fine, really Shera, James. Go back to your dancing…I want to watch…see how we're coming along."_

_"Alright, Daddy," Shera says, nodding at Twin now dubbed James._

_James walks back over to Cid's sister, and Vincent drags Yuffie up by her elbows much to her disdain, and then suddenly Cecil is playing music again and we're right back to where we started._

_I'm failing miserably once again._

_"Ow! Ow! Cloud! Foot! Toe!" _

_"Oh, sorry," I mumble._

_"Strife!"_

_Damn you people!  
_

_Grant's yelling at me. The man who can't walk is yelling at me! Well, I guess I can't dance, so…_

_This sucks!  
_

_Grant's hobbling over towards us now, ignoring Cecil and Shera's protests._

_"Get out of the way, boy," Grant shoves me with his cane, poking me in the side._

_Is he going to dance?_

_"Start the music, rainbow fluff!"_

_Cecil gasps, but complies, restarting the music._

_Poor Cecil, even he can't catch a break with this guy._

_Tifa stands there hesitantly, not knowing what to do. Grant puts one of her hands on his shoulder and the other on top of his on his cane._

_This is comical, really. Tifa's about five inches taller than Grant and Tifa isn't that tall in the first place._

_I almost start to smirk until I see that Grant, the crippled man, that's right, the crippled man with bushy eyebrows and shorter than Tifa, is dancing better with a bloody cane than I on my own two feet. Man, talk about embarrassment._

_Tifa smiles, they don't move much but at least he isn't decapitating her toes._

_Man, I really suck at life._

_After watching them through one agonizing song, Grant finally acknowledges me._

_"Alright boy," he waves at me with his cane, "If a crippled old man can do it, so can you."_

_I bet he didn't step on her toes because he has three legs. Well, two legs and a cane. Course, that's one more thing for him to watch from killing her toes with…_

_Dammit._

_I step up slowly, taking Tifa's hand and putting my other hand on her waist. Grant slaps my feet with his cane._

_"Spread those feet apart, boy!"_

_Tifa's smiling at me, but I'm telling you, this is bad because this is erasing the shoe massacre from everyone's minds._

_I can't dance man! Give it up._

_"No, that isn't right, move this foot," cane down on right foot, "Then this one!" cane down on left foot._

_Ouch._

_"Now you know how it feels, so maybe you'll stop doing it to the lady!" Grant grunts._

_Why me?!  
_

_"Start the music, tooty fruity!"_

_"I never!" Cecil gasps, but starts up the music anyways. _

_Tifa closes her eyes in preparation for the pain…but…it never comes. Grant shouts orders at me and I follow them, and by the end of the lesson I can dance without stepping on Tifa's toes! Course, it isn't a very good dance, but its better._

_Grant's talking again, "I tell you, I could do a mean Tango with the missus back in the day, rest her dear soul…shame I can't walk without my cane, else I'd steal your girlfriend for the dance! Hell knows you can't do that boy, even with me and razzle dazzle coaching you!"  
_

_"My name is Cecil!"_

_Tifa grins down at the man, "I would love to Tango; Salsa and Swing dancing are my favorites. It is a shame, I would've been honored."_

_Damn the old man! Quit wooing Tifa!_

_But the old man does seem a bit happier…I guess he really does like dancing._

_"Well, thank you for teaching Cloud how to dance, Grant. I appreciate it."_

_"Dance?" Grant scoffs, "That looked more like a petrified Chocobo with fleas!"_

_Stupid old man._

**A/N: edit: **I changed the title.Razzle dazzle tooty fruity rainbow fluff. Poor Cecil! Ah well, that was fun. Shoe of Carange...beware! Thanks for all of the reviews, loves! I need to respond to you guys, but I'm so busy with just writing! But never fear, I will eventually! I love you! I also posted a new story...check it out if it tickles your fancy. Till next time!


	56. Pink Wedding

_Pink Wedding_

_There is such a level of discomfort that I think we should all just walk away…really and forget this ever happened._

_"Don't any of you bastards __**dare **__look down," Barret says gruffly, eyes on the ceiling._

_"Like I want to see your bare legs, Barret," Reeve retorts, his eyes too at the ceiling._

_"Did you remember to shave yours, pussy?" Barret growls._

_Vincent is unmoving, his eyes closed, but a line is forming on his brow and growing deeper by the second._

_"I think Vincent's about to have a stroke," Reeve says._

_Barret glances down, looking at Vincent._

_"Vincent…you alright buddy?"_

_Vincent's eyes slowly open, "Mental preparation."_

_Barret grunts, looking at me._

_"Spike! Oi, why aren't you wearing yours?"_

_I blink and stare at him. Does he really need to ask this question?_

_"Its dress rehearsal, you have to wear the dress—_

_"It isn't a dress, it's a skirt," Reeve says._

_"No, it's a damn kilt and what the hell Barret's right…where is your kilt, Cloud?" Cid's growls from behind us._

_I turn, frozen on the spot. Barret's right, keep the eyes to the skies. No way I want to see a bunch of hairy men legs._

_"Er…"_

_"Cid, there you are!" Tifa smiles, walking in from another room._

_"Girl! What's with your boy?" Cid gestures to me._

_I still have my eyes up, so I don't see Tifa or anyone really._

_"Oh…I told him there would be snacks and stuff…he didn't want to spill something on his kilt, or mess up his shoes dancing. You know how he is with dancing," Tifa laughs._

_I hear several disbelieving curses behind me, and almost smirk. That's right bastards, who's smart? I'm smart. Hell yes. Or…Tifa's smart. Either way I win. The end._

_"Oh…" Cid grunts, "Still…whatever. Anyways, what are we waiting on?"_

_"Shera had to try on her dress…she's taking it off now."_

_"Why?" Cid asks._

_I spare a glance down, noticing that Tifa isn't in her bridesmaid dress._

_Tifa gives a little laugh, "Come on Cid, you know the superstition. The groom can't see the bride in her dress before the wedding! Plus, none of us want to mess up our dresses. We tried them on, just to make sure we could walk in them, and sit in them. Other than that, this dress rehearsal is a figure of speech. Didn't you know that, Cid?"_

_"Holy shit," Barret says from behind me with relief._

_I glance over my shoulder, suddenly noticing the lack of three other men. Apparently they follow in my lead._

_"Cid…" I say slowly, "I think you're missing your grooms and best man."_

_"Those sunovabitches. I'm going to kill them," Cid shuffles on his feet; "Still…you have a good point Tifa. It won't take us long to get changed."_

_Cid leaves, a bit disappointed, and I glance over at Tifa. She gives an encouraging smile, and I think what it may be like doing this for our wedding._

_Man that's weird._

_I follow Tifa out into the area where the wedding will take place. It's empty right now, long lines of pews stretching up to the dais ahead. They'll be bringing in flowers and stuff like that today after we get done…or tomorrow morning before we start. I don't know, and I don't care._

_Cid enters behind us, followed by the rest of the men and women in the wedding party…or most of them._

_"Alright, listen up…we got to get this right else that ball of fluffy goodness Cecil will kick my ass…don't get it cos it's my wedding, and that fruitcake shouldn't care."_

_"Cid…" Shera says softly, and he continues._

_"Back to business… Best man is Barret…any complaints? Kiss my ass it's my wedding and if you want to be the main man in the kilt, then by all means, I'm sure Barret will resign his position. One of you bitches may be lucky enough to be halfway hidden behind some flowers, but not the best man."_

_Barret looks like he could kill._

_"Maid of honor is Shera's sister, Wendy, so those two are paired up. Course, we got Tifa, Yuffie, and my sis Carla for the other maids. Cloud, Vincent, and Reeve are the grooms."  
_

_Barret glances at Reeve, "Where were you when we had dancing lessons?"_

_"I heard about Cloud massacring everyone with Yuffie's shoe. Must have been like a carnival game. Anyways, I already know how to dance. Midgar Ballroom champion three years in a row. I've had practice," Reeve says._

_Barret grunts in disdain, "Why not four years?"_

_"Bloody Tseng, that's why," Reeve mutters bitterly._

_"Tseng ballroom dances?" Yuffie squawks._

_"__**Anyways**__," Cid growls, "Benny's the ring bearer, and of course the only small female we have around here other than Yuffie—_

_"Bastard!"_

_"Is Marlene…so little Mar is the flower girl."_

_"Where is Benny?" Shera asks._

_"Marlene's on the beach with Denzel and Cecil," Barret says, "Good guy, Cecil."_

_"The hell, Barret? You fallin in love?" Cid asks._

_"I will kill you."_

_"He'll get a nice look at your legs tomorrow, better watch your back Barret if you catch my drift," Yuffie grins._

_"Don't push me, girl."_

_"Oh I know what'll push you—_

_"Enough!" Cid shouts, "Let's get this over with. You people are too crazy to spend this much time with."_

_"Hey man, we still got the bachelor party after this, don't start complaining now," Barret grunts._

_"Is Cecil coming?" Yuffie grins._

_Barret takes a menacing step forward, and Tifa intervenes, "Actually he's coming to the bachlorette party." _

_"Scary," Cid mumbles._

_"Speaking of Benny…where is Carla?" Shera asks._

_Cid shrugs, "Who gives a damn? They know what to do. Let's get this over with ladies."_

_The practice goes by rather smoothly, or as smoothly as something can go with these people._

_After we finish up, we gather round talking and Cid tells us there are refreshments in the back. We begin to move towards the door, but I pause, looking around as the others exit._

_My gaze rises, catching Tifa standing alone in the light from one of the windows at the dais. I move slowly towards her, stepping up beside of her as she gazes around the room._

_"You know," she says, "I can't imagine having a wedding in this place…it's so huge. Do we know enough people to actually fill all these seats?"_

_I shrug, seeing what she means._

_"I mean, it's different with Shera and Cid. Shera has a sister and four brothers…and Cid has a sister. It's amazing seeing a family so big, especially like Shera's. I think…it'd be strange, growing up with five siblings."_

_I nod my head in agreement._

_"I think it'd be nice though…you'd never get lonely."_

_I glance at her out of the corner of my eye, her gaze still roaming over the large room._

_"A big family…" I say, not voicing the question, but she hears it anyone._

_"Yeah," she smiles, "I think a big family would be nice."_

_"…three?" Man this is hard to talk about. Awkward…_

_She laughs, blushing, "We've already got two."_

_"I know."_

_She turns then, grinning at me large. She reaches up and pulls me down for a kiss._

_Now this is what I'm talking about…perfect way to start a big family if you ask me…_

_"Rah! It was you! I know it was you! Get back here!" _

_The sudden scream breaks us apart, and I glance towards the entrance to the way._

_Yuffie comes tearing into the room, grinning maniacally. Cid follows, and so does his sister Carla, but she's holding a big pink blanket—_

_Whoa…operation dye has been commenced and executed._

_Yuffie flings herself down the isle, Cid hot on her heels, his sister stopping halfway._

_There's a bawling, pink Benny in her arms, and I'd almost laugh if he didn't look so pathetic. Course I'm thinking Cid and Yuffie's showdown will be much more interesting._

_They're facing each other at opposite ends of the pews. Cid lets out a battle cry, rushing down beside the pew. Yuffie darts down a couple pews, rushing in the opposite direction. She's going for freedom, but Cid won't have that._

_Cid places his hand on the back of the pew, and in a swift movement launches himself over it and onto the next pew. Suddenly he's hopping from pew to pew, closing in on Yuffie._

_Yuffie glances over her shoulder, squeaking and dropping in between two pews. Cid reaches the pews, staring down yelling and cursing._

_"Brat! Get your ass out here! I do __**not**__ want a pink ring bearer!"_

_There's a high pitched laugh from beneath the pews somewhere, and Yuffie shouts back._

_"You can't get it out! It's that special thief detector and it'll last for at least two days!"_

_"Yuffie!" Cid screams, his face red. _

_He starts running across the pews again, and Yuffie crawls out for freedom. She reaches the isle a few pews before Cid, and Cid spots her, yelling another war cry._

_"Stupid crazy Wutai bitch!"_

_"Fat balding pilot!" Yuffie screams over her shoulder, taking off down the isle and out the way they came._

_Cid jumps from the pews, landing in the isle and takes off after her. His sister scoops up Benny, and she rushes him down the isle, his pink face, and pink arms, and pink hair…_

_Yuffie's a genius._

_Tifa's standing there with her mouth open, "Good lord…"_

_She glances at me, and I look down at her._

_She meets my eyes seriously, "Let's have a small wedding."_

_"Definitely."_

**A/N: **It's a nice day for a white weddin...obviously Billy Idol missed that memo...Pink is totally the new white. My Disjointed Life ended...so sad, I love that story. I hope he publishes it (I'm sure most of you know who I'm talking about) Anyways, **DC **Dude, I wish I would've thought about that...carnival points...Reeve's comment was just for you. **GeneralDragon: **Ha! If I hear rainbow fluff, I'll know who spread it. **zenbon zakura** I know I know...Yuffie's feet are small in AC, but the real Yuffie (not the CG one) definitely has feet of doom...godzilla feet. I just thought it'd be entertaining since she's so little, she needs to balance it out some how. My brother's head is so big we have to special order hats for him...how sad is that? **onewingedangel **AHAHA...I was hoping someone would say something about that line...heh **zaz9-zaa0 **Tifa is definitely the dancing queen. Dude, that would be great, Vincent walking around with a table stuck to his toe. Classic. Anyways, thanks for reviews everyone! I LOVE YOU!


	57. One Day

**A/N: **Any OOC ness can be attributed to the drunkedness...enjoy!

_One Day…_

_Go get more drinks, Cloud…we'll be right here when you get back, I swear…_

_Bastards. _

_How come it is that I'm the one who gets shipped off to get more beer when Cid doesn't show up? Who knows what the hell they're doing now…_

_I last left Barret, Reeve, Vincent, Nanaki, and Shera's brothers and a few other assorted people on the bonfire out at the beach. I know about the time I was leaving Barret was pulling out some fireworks, and since then I've heard many screams (Of joy and pain) and there has been exploding colors in the sky._

_We initially sent Cid out to get the rest of the beer. Hey he offered to. Since then he's been missing, and Barret and Reeve aren't exactly one to wait on their beer. They're still bitter I didn't wear the kilt. _

_I move up to the bar at the edge of the beach, still bright and full of people. _

_The bartender nods at me, "What can I get ya?"_

_"Uh…I need about…" I cut off, glancing down the bar._

_I blink wide at the sight, and turn back to the bartender, "Just a minute."_

_I move quickly down the bar lifting up the head of Cid whose murmuring incessantly._

_"Cid?" I ask the muttering head._

_"Mother…what am I doooinnngg, Cloud?" he whines, his voice near incomprehensible._

_Damn Barret, screw him for sending me up here to deal with the drunk man with last minute jitters._

_"Cid…you're getting married. Tomorrow…or later today," I reply sitting down beside of him._

_"I __**know**__ that moron…I meant why? Why am I marrying Shera?"_

_I blink, this is going to be one freaking long night._

_"Cid—_

_"I said! ..." he pauses, trying to remember what he said._

_It takes him a minute._

_"I said! I said that I'd never…let a woman, one of those things…I'd never let a woman rule my life!" he slaps his hand on the counter with conviction._

_"Cid…Shera doesn't rule your life—_

_"Yes she does! The woman smacks me with books, a-and…and…what the hell else does she do?"_

_"Make tea?" I suggest._

_"Yeah! She makes…tea…Cloud," he whines, "That isn't helping me to convince me that I need to run away!"_

_You can't run away…you're too old and drunk._

_"Why are you so scared?" I ask._

_I'm not going to be like this before my wedding, am I?_

_He looks away from me, sipping his beer, "Spike…do you know what it's like to disappoint a woman?"_

_What?_

_"I mean…really, really, really disappoint her? I'm a sorry excuse for a husband. I won't be what she wants or-or needs."_

_I frown, "Weren't you the one who told me to respect my woman? Maybe you should give her judgment a bit of credit."_

_"Are you freaking crazy? You remember how she got into this whole mess! She was willing to put her damn life on the line just so I could go into space! She's a crazy bitch! Why would she do something like that? Why would she say yes to some washed up pilot? She's crazy, I freaking tell you," he throws his hands up in the air in exasperation._

_You're not to far from the asylum yourself, buddy._

_"It was her dream too, for you to go into space."_

_"That didn't give her the right to do sometin studip like that."_

_Stupid Cid, not studip. Ew, stew dip…that sounds nasty._

_He sips on his beer again._

_He looks at me, his eyes a little unfocused, but it doesn't keep him from talking some more._

_"I mean…she'll want me to be a father! She'll want to have __**kids**__. I don't do good with kids. I'm a mean bastard, and I'll hit them with a wrench or sometin studip like that."_

_Stupid Cid! Stupid!_

_"No you won't."_

_"Yes I will! Have you looked at me lately? I'm a mess, a freaking mess. I smoke…I curse…I can't even iron my damn handkerchiefs without singeing them!"  
_

_Where the hell did that come from?_

_"I can't make them lunch, or-or tell them bedtime stories. I'll…I'd be the worst father ever…and I can't change. Hell knows I've tried. But I'm Cid, and Cid is Cid and that's Cid…Cid…" he sounds a bit confused._

_This is going to take more effort than I thought._

_"Cid…think about it."_

_"What?"_

_"Barret's a father. If he's a father, then you can be a father too."_

_"Point," he grunts, "But Barret was married before he was a father…he…he knew things."_

_I shrug, "Then you have to get married to be a father…"_

_Crisis solved._

_He shrugs, "I guess so."_

_"Well, you can wait a couple years if you aren't ready for kids."_

_"No we can't."_

_I give him a perplexed look, and he grins._

_"Shera's already pregnant."_

_I cough, nearly choking on my beer._

_He laughs, "Weren't expectin that, were ya chocobo ass?"_

_I'm going to overlook that._

_"This isn't the reason…why…"_

_"Hell no. I asked her to marry me long before this happened. She just found out before we got here."_

_I nod my head slowly, "Congratulations."_

_Though I can kind of see why Cid was so worried…man…Cid as a father…I hope Shera can make up for that._

_"You can't run away now," I say._

_He glances at me, "Why?"_

_Uh…well duh, Cid, "She's pregnant."_

_"Oh, right. I guess you're right," he stares off for a moment, then smirks, "So what about you, Spike-o?"_

_I shrug._

_"When's it happenin?" I don't question how he already seems to know about mine and Tifa's engagement._

_"Haven't set a date yet."_

_He nods his head, "Yeah, figured as much. You know that bet was a joke, right?"_

_I glance up suddenly, narrowing my eyes._

_"Me and Yuff didn't actually think you'd get it done, but ya did."_

_"The dress?"_

_He chuckles, "I already knew I was payin for that. It's just fun to mess with your head. Too easy sometimes, really."_

_Bastard!_

_"But…don't ever tell Tifa about it. She'll doubt your engagement for the same reason you doubted mine and Shera's…thinkin it was for some other reason than love."_

_I almost smirk, "So you do love Shera."_

_He shrugs, "Wouldn't say that."_

_I do smirk, ever the proud, Cid._

_"You scared of being a dad, Cloud?" Cid asks._

_I shrug, "I probably will be…"_

_He chuckles, "Chicken."_

_What the? Alright, no more open talks with Cid. He's too much of a bastard even drunk._

_"Course," Cid says, "We're all cowards…else we wouldn't get married."_

_I stare at him until he answers._

_"Who wants to get old alone? Scary, that shit is."_

_"Cid…you're already old."_

_"Shut up you scrawny bastard. If I'm old, you aren't too many years off yourself."_

_"I'll never be old."_

_"Bitch, you gonna start losin that muscle one day. You'll be flabby, and Tifa will be like bitch, you flabby and dump your ass."_

_I shake my head, smirking and he laughs again._

_"At least I won't be bald."_

_"I can always call Benny to take care of that problem."_

_"I'll threaten him with pink."_

_"So, Denzel good to be the ring bearer?"_

_I nod my head, "He'll be good."_

_Cid chuckles, "I even offered to let Benny still do it, but I'll be surprised if he even shows up for the weddin. That Yuffie…she'll be the death of us all."_

_"Or the pink of us."_

_He shrugs, "Either way, it'll suck. Getting married, having a baby; strange feelin, bein nervous. One day…you'll feel what its like," he looks at me out of the corner of his eye, "And I'll be there to smack the shit, or the sense, into you. Or out of you, if we're talking shit. What are we talking about again?"_

_I smirk, "I think you need to go rest, Cid."_

_"Fuck that, it's my bachelor party…" he looks around, a bit confused, "Where the hells is my party?"_

_"Back where you left it."_

_He scratches his head, "Bump that…I'm stayin here."_

_His head suddenly falls forward and hits the table, knocked out in his drunken stupor._

_Damn him._

_I sigh deeply, wondering how long I should just let him lie there. I would leave him here all night if he wasn't getting married in the morning. I don't want him to be late…but he's going to have one hell of a hang over._

_"Cloud?"_

_I turn my head quickly, catching Tifa staring at me._

_…or rather a tipsy Tifa._

_She giggles like the sight of me is just amusing in itself._

_"Tifa…?"_

_"Yep. It's me. I came to get…stuff…drinks…" she shakes a finger at the bar._

_"How much have you had already?"_

_"More than you probably," she retorts, moving to the bar._

_She's about to order when she glances down and sees Cid._

_She grabs him by the hair and lifts his head up, "Cid? Yep…it's Cid," and she drops his head back down on the bar._

_I flinch as he hits it, but he doesn't even stir, just snores. It makes Tifa giggle again._

_"Teef…can you help?" I ask, gesturing to the unconscious man._

_She shrugs, "Can't see why not…though the girls will be displeased when I do not return with their drinks."_

_"Isn't Yuffie underage?"_

_"Shh!" She smacks my arm, "D-don't tell anyone, Cloud!" _

_I shrug, lifting one of Cid's arms and throwing it over my shoulder. I watch Tifa do the same, and she wobbles a bit. …I wonder if this is a good idea…_

_Too late now seeing that Tifa has already lifted Cid and began to drag him away while I'm still standing here. I scramble to catch Cid's arm again. Tifa forgets how strong she is when she's intoxicated._

_"I thought you weren't going to drink," I say as we cross the boardwalk and the street._

_"When'd I say that?" she giggles._

_"When you left the room…"_

_"Oh," she giggles, and hiccups, "I lied…well…I didn't realize at the time I was lying, but now I am cos I did drink but Yuffie spiked my drink and it was all down hill from there, and when…crap, what happened?"_

_I blink, a bit startled wondering what the hell Yuffie put in her drink to get her this confused._

_She looks at me suddenly, serious, "Did you know that you're suppose to pee on someone if they get stung by a jellyfish? Apparently it takes the sting away."_

_What?  
_

_"Cecil told me," she answers the unvoiced question._

_"Was he at the bachelorette party?"_

_She giggles as we make our way into the hotel, "Nope," she points with her hand, "There he is. I just said that so no one would say anything about Barret and CeCe."_

_Cecil standing at the desk looking rather bored, but perks up when he sees us._

_"Oh dear," he says when we reach the desk, "Our groom has passed out. Better now than on the beach."_

_"He almost did," I mutter._

_Tifa grins, "CeCe…will you be at the weddin tomorrow?"_

_"Oh honey I can smell you," he pinches his nose, "Don't know yet; it depends on my schedule. But I'll be sure to stop by."_

_"Okay," she grins, ignoring the smell comment, "What room number is Cid again?"_

_Cecil types something into the computer, "Six one nine. You got that hun?"_

_"Nine one four, got it," she grins._

_Cecil gives me a doubtful look, "Please tell me one of you is sober."_

_"Close enough…six one nine," I say._

_"Thank goodness," Cecil says, and we move on._

_We somehow make it onto the elevator, and up to the sixth floor. Tifa barely reaches the door and I fish Cid's key out of his pocket. We unlock the door, and make it to his bed and toss him on it. Tifa's motherly nature takes over even drunk, and she moves to try and get his head on a pillow, and takes off his boots. Personally I won't go anywhere near Cid's feet. Who knows what lies in wait there._

_Tifa brushes her hands, and grins at me. I lead her out of the room, leaving Cid's keys on the nightstand. We get on the elevator, and I push the four button._

_Tifa frowns up at me, "But the party is on two…and …the bachelor…is…"_

_I stare down at her, "No…you need rest."_

_She sticks her tongue out at me, but her head falls against my chest as we descend. When the doors open she makes no move to walk, so I reach around, and pick her up, careful to not bump her head or feet as I maneuver out of the elevator._

_I move down the hallway to our room and Tifa digs her key out and unlocks the door from my arms._

_I stumble inside, the few drinks I had making me a bit woozy. I move quickly to the bed, and place her on it. She proceeds with the difficult task of pulling off her boots. I lock the door and get her some water. She drinks it, even in her drunken state knowing that it'll be worse in the morning if she doesn't._

_I sit down beside of her on the bed, and sigh, glancing at the clock. It says two thirty, and I run my hair through my hand._

_"You aren't mad at me, are you?"_

_I glance at her, confused, "Why would I be?"_

_"Cos I lied," she says pathetically, downing the rest of her water._

_I take the glass from her hand, "If it involves Yuffie, I don't blame you."_

_She giggles, sliding down the bed so she can lie down. Apparently it's time to sleep._

_I turn out the lights, crashing onto the bed beside of her, and she rolls to face me. She stares at me for a minute, before shutting her eyes slowly, sleep finally taking over._

_I watch her despite my want of sleep, trailing my fingers down her arm, and onto her hip._

'Getting married, having a baby; strange feelin, bein nervous. One day, you'll feel what it's like…'

_I run my hand across her stomach, and she mumbles in her sleep, rolling against me, and fitting her head beneath my chin._

_One day…_

**A/N: **that was fun. HOLY FISHSTICKS BATMAN! WE HIT 1000 REVIEWS. (Certain thanks to a particular zealous reviewer Cough sael cough hee, thanks bud) Man, this site has been screwy today, hasn't it? Ah well, I need the sleepage. Enjoy this fast update if you even get the update alert or if it'll let you open it. Hopefully all this craziness tis fixed. Till next time loves! THANKS AGAIN! wooo 1000! and three, technically. but still! 1000 XD happy days


	58. Falling In Love With You

_Falling In Love With You_

_I twitch…there's something highly uncomfortable about…well…feeling the cool breeze between my legs. Damn Nanaki…doesn't have to wear a freaking kilt or dance. Bastard._

_God I hate my life._

_"…do you, Shera Willow take Cid Highwind to be your lawfully wedded husband?"_

_Shera grins, "I do," she says softly._

_The wedding party looks funny, complete with a rather large, bulky one armed man, a sulking, morbid clown wannabe, and a rather unpreturbed three time ballroom champion cat novelty collector in man skirts. _

_Oh we're completely ignoring me. No way am I actually standing up here in this plaid skirt. _

_Life sucks._

_"And do you, Cid Highwind, take Shera Willow to be your lawfully wedded bride?"_

_Cid's about as red as a tomato…oh entertainment._

_"I do," he mutters._

_My eyes lift, roaming towards where I can see Cecil, Grant, the twins, and other assorted Shera and Cid relatives all watching with these reactions: tears, anger…happiness, sorrow…_

_I'd say it's a pretty mixed reaction, this wedding._

_Still desptie the fact that I am currently wearing…I can't even __**think**__ it…anyways, despite my sorrow currently occuring, I give a tiny smile._

_Cid married…scary._

_My eyes travel away from Cid and Shera._

_"Then I now pronounce you…" _

_Tifa's grinning, she's practically glowing, standing there with Yuffie, Carla, and Wendy. Her hair's been pulled back, and there are flowers in it. All four of them are wearing burgundy dresses that match our...dammit…our s-kilts._

_Tifa's grin gets bigger, eyes on the happy couple_

_"… husband and wife…"_

_Tifa's eyes move as these words are said, connecting with mine for the umpteenth time this ceremony, but I think there's something different about this._

_I think somethings going through both of our heads…how this will be us one day, and Cid and Shera will be in our places._

_"You may kiss the bride."_

_There's a moment of silence, and then a loud applause. I know why everyone's clapping, and I know I should be clapping, or at least watching, but I can't, cause Tifa's still watching me. This is their big day, and all I can think about is Tifa. _

_She doesn't take her eyes off of me until the preist begins to speak, then she blushes, and breaks the contact, looking towards the newlyweds._

_Oh damn Cid's married. I repeat: scary thought._

_"I present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Cid Highwind!"_

_There's another round of applause, and Grant struggles to stand on his cane. There will be a lot of talking now…and a lot of shaking hands and taking pictures. Then there will be more talking and more taking pictures and more shaking hands at the reception. At least there will be food._

_But I'll have to dance. Damn. Actually, damn for Tifa because she has to dance with me. I know last time I didn't mess up, but who's to say this time won't be a complete disaster?_

_Which it may very well be._

_I move to walk back down the aisle, Tifa looping her arm through mine, her other hand clutching her tiny bouquet. _

_"I almost fainted," she whispers out of the corner of her mouth yet somehow mangaing to still smile._

_"I told you not to lock your knees."_

_"I didn't," she hisses, "It was so hot!"_

_"It wasn't that hot."_

_"Hey, my dress is longer than yours," she mutters._

_I have a half second falter in my step before recovering. She giggles, squeezing my arm._

_"Excuse me…your kilt is shorter than my dress."_

_I glower at her, but she just grins innocently back up. It will take many hours of bikini Tifa to make up for that one._

_Somehow I manage to survive it through photos, and shaking hands in the chapel, and the wedding party finally makes its way to the reception area. I can see now why they chose the Dolphin Tail Resort simply for the area of the reception. Grant has got to be loaded to afford all this._

_The ballroom that's been rented out has vaulted ceilings, and is done in stone work. There's a dance floor, and a long table set out for the wedding party, and an assortment of other tables. Large candelabras are all along the wall, and it makes a nice affect as sunset is approaching outside. There's large open archways with french doors that lead out to a balcony that wraps around the ballroom. It overlooks an expansive garden, and the ocean._

_There's lots of people in the ballroom when we arrive, and the first thing they're going to make us do is dance._

_Damn them._

_Cid and Shera get out on the floor by themselves, the guests gathering round to watch the two dance for the first time as an official married couple._

_I don't see what the big deal is…course, I guess it's different if you're the one getting married._

_Cid doesn't step on Shera's toes once. I'm jealous._

_Shera's dress is pretty simple, still…it's a bit unnerving to see Cid's hairy man legs beside her pretty white dress. _

_…which shouldn't technically be white.  
_

_Oh burn!_

_Tifa squeezes my arm. What? What's going on?_

_Oh crap she's taking me out on the dance floor! No! No! I don't want to dance._

_Dammit._

_She puts her hand on my shoulder, and grabs my other hand, and we sway back and forth to the music._

_Everyone's watching us…well, not just me and Tifa, but us as a group. I hear Yuffie in the background snickering to Vincent about how I'm going to mess up, and I grit my teeth._

_Tifa shakes her head, "Just ignore her."_

_Yeah, like that's possible._

_She squeezes my hand, "Don't worry…the guests will be joining us soon, and not watching."_

_How soon?_

_She gives me a reassuring smile, "Here they come."_

_And she's right. People are starting to poor out onto the dance floor. I let out a sigh of relief, the dance going by a lot faster than I remember._

_…maybe it's just because I didn't step on her toes. Once. I am the man, the dancing man._

_In a kilt. Man, it just hits me at the oddest times. It's kind of easy to block out, then bam! You're in a kilt!_

_Grr…_

_"May I cut in?"_

_I glance, looking up at Barret._

_"No."_

_"Move your ass, Spike before you step on tha poor girl's toes!"_

_Bastard._

_I relent my hold on Tifa, who's laughing, and I move away from them._

_But peace is above my reach right now it seems._

_"You got burned," Marlene pops up from nowhere._

_"What?"_

_"You got owned. Papa just owned you," she grins._

_Does she even know what that means?_

_"Marlene…?"_

_"Will you dance with me?"_

_I blink, "What?"_

_She huffs, putting her hands on her hips, "I said, will you dance with me? Denzel's off dancing with that stupid flower girl, and daddy's dancing with Tifa, so will you dance with me?"_

_I scratch the back of my head._

_"Uh…I might…kill your toes."_

_She grins, "Don't worry, I know how too. You won't be able to step on my feet."_

_She grabs my hand before I can protest and drags me back onto the dance floor. I watch as she lifts up her dress a little bit to see her feet, then she steps forward to balance on top of my toes._

_Huh…this is easy._

_She grabs my hands, and I start moving my feet._

_Heck yeah! She was right…I can't kill her toes._

_Yuffie and one of Shera's brothers sways past me. I can hear her cackling laughter._

_Marlene grins up at me, raising an eyebrow, and with a swift move of my foot we both step on Yuffie's toes._

_…which isn't that hard to do since Yuffie has giant feet._

_Yuffie's face turns red, and she shoots us a look, but Marlene sends her an innocent smile._

_More people are laughing at us now, but I don't mind…because the first one was Yuffie and Yuffie's…well…Yuffie laughs because she's mean._

_The other people laugh cause they think it's cute._

_"I'm stealing your partner...Rainbow fluff is dancing with Tifa."_

_Dammit Barret! Make up your mind!_

_He doesn't even give me time to protest, just picks Marlene up off of my feet and puts her on his._

_He glares at me, before swaying around into the crowd._

_Dammit._

_Ah well, who wants to dance anyways?_

_I join Vincent on the wall watching the swaying crowd._

_"Dancing not really your thing?"_

_"No," he replies, not even looking at me._

_I nod my head…it's kind of more awkward than it would be if we were wearing pants. Instead we're wearing kilts._

_Dammit, the kilt brain is back._

_The dancing ends after the next song, and apparently there's fun games to be played, and cake to be eaten._

_Yay cake._

_Of course as it is with any wedding, the bride shoves cake up the groom's nose for being a man, and the groom can't shove cake all over the bride's face because she gives him that look that says 'if you get icing on this dress I'm going to slaughter you, husband or not' or something of that affect._

_So, after cake and food, Cid gets the honor shooting Shera's garter to all the bachelors._

_I stand aside, knowing that I'm getting married regardless. Wow, that's a weird feeling._

_Yuffie pushes Barret, Nanaki, Reeve, and Vincent out onto the floor. Barret lets out a few curse words, and Yuffie threatens to lift up all of their kilts if they don't stand there. _

_Cid stretches the garter back, and it goes flying into the crowd._

_Annnndddd…_

_Hits Nanaki in the eye…his good eye._

_Ouch. _

_There's a loud snarl and Nanaki charges after Cid. Yuffie tackles Nanaki, and Cid hides behind Shera._

_Shera decides it's time to throw the bouquet._

_Good call, Shera._

_So, for retribution Nanaki forces Yuffie to stand out there on the floor. _

_Shera tosses it, and Nanaki shoves Yuffie into the path of the bouquet. Yuffie catches it, and there is a moment of silence._

_"Damn you Nanaki! I'm not getting freaking married! Ever!" she screeches, tossing the bouquet towards Tifa._

_Tifa laughs at her, and Nanaki shrugs, moving on. I think Yuffie may have just blown her chances with Shera's brothers who coincidentally are now Cid's brothers._

_Scary._

_And now it is time to mingle…weddings…mingling…what's the point? Really._

_So I escape. _

_I move outside through one of the many doors finding the balcony surprisingly deserted. I sigh, leaning forward onto the railing of the balcony watching the sunset over the ocean and garden._

_Inside I can hear Barret's voice pouring from the doors delivering his duty as best man._

_"…So, the first time I met Cid…well, you guys won't believe the story…but anyways, we were in a lot of trouble with a certain company. Anyways, so, Cid…he always makes quite the first impression on people I have to say. I'm sure all of you know that. He's got a mouth, he demands tea, he likes to smoke—_

_"I'm quitting bastard!"_

_Barret chuckles, "See what I mean? And you aren't going to quit, face it. But Cid…he's a good man even if he doesn't want to be one. I mean, look at him. He had to of done __**something**__ right for Shera to be stickin around. Not every man gets as lucky as him to marry a great gal. Keep her, close, Cid. It's your job to take care of her, now."_

_I frown, the first thoughts of Barret's wife entering my mind. This must be rough on him…I really wonder what was the last wedding he's been to…if the last wedding he was at was his own._

_"Are you hiding?" Tifa asks from behind me._

_I glance over my shoulder, and she smiles, joining me at the railing._

_"You are…"_

_"Mingling isn't really me…" I say, and she loops her arm through mine._

_"Ya know…you need to dance with me again."_

_I frown, "Why?"_

_She scoffs, "Why? Because, Barret stole me, and you went off and danced with another woman."_

_"…I danced…with Marlene. You danced with Cecil."_

_"That's not the point."_

_"Are you really going to make me…?"_

_"Don't doubt me, Cloud. I will force you to dance with me."_

_I shrug, "Fine…but when I step on your toes…don't blame me."_

_She laughs again, pulling me away from the balcony._

_"There isn't any music."_

_"Hasn't stopped us before," she grins, wrapping her arms around my neck._

_Cid's voice is coming in through the doors now, "I have an announcement to make for a few close friends…dammit, where are they? Anyways, I'm sure most of you know my good friends Cloud Strife, and Tifa Lockhart."_

_There's a chorus of yeahs, and a whoop from Yuffie._

_"Well, I thought I'd have the honor of letting you know that sometime soon Tifa Lockhart will be becoming Tifa Strife."_

_"Ehmahgawd!" Yuffie squeals._

_There's a loud cheer and a yell, and I hear people calling our names._

_Cid's still talking though, "So to those two love birds…where ever the hell they are, this one's for you. Don't waste it, Spike and don't crush her toes."_

_'Wise men say  
__Only fools rush in  
__But I can't help  
__Falling in love with you.'_

_Tifa laughs, her head falling against my shoulder._

_"We still have a lot to figure out before I become Mrs. Strife."_

_I grunt in response._

_'Shall I stay  
__Would it be a sin  
__If I can't help  
__Falling in love with you.'_

_"You know, when we were up there…I couldn't help but think that one day…that'll be us…"_

_I nod my head._

_'As a river flows  
__Surely to the sea  
Darling so it goes  
Some things were meant to be.'_

_The sun is setting over the ocean now, the world orange and red around us._

_She smiles up at me, "I didn't think life could turn out this good."_

_"What do you mean?"_

_She shrugs, looking towards the sunset, "After everything that's happened to us…it's hard to believe we're all moving on and living our lives. It's hard to believe that finally after everything that's happened, we're happy."_

_I kiss her forehead, surprising even myself, "I've been happy…for a long time."_

_Her head falls up against my shoulder, and I feel her sigh, "When?"_

_"Soon, I promise."_

_"Small…remember?"_

_"Big family, I remember that."_

_"You just want the means to getting there," she giggles against my chest._

_I want it all…_

_"What do you think…" I say slowly, "About…moving out here? Not now…just…one day…"_

_I feel her nod against my chest, "When we start our family."_

_"Okay."  
__  
__'For I can't help  
Falling in love with you.'_

**A/N: **I LOVE that song. Only Elvis can sing it and make it right. Before you say, well Horky, Elvis isn't in Gaia...Elvis is freaking everywhere. He went to their world after he was abducted by aliens. Heh, but really now, I know I didn't use all the lyrics, but still...I lovvvvveeee this song. And I love you guys! Thanks for the reviews! You're all so nice! I love you!


	59. Oh SNAP

_Oh SNAP_

_Gah...math sucks. I need an accountant._

"_At the rate you're going? I'd say about five years give or take a bit," Reeve says, scribbling some numbers on the corner of a napkin._

_I nod my head slowly, glancing around the beach for familiar faces._

_Reeve lays down the pen, picking up his coffee and sipping it._

_He sighs, licking his lips and putting the cup back down on the table, "So...if you don't mind me asking, Cloud...why do you need to save up so much money? Well, I mean, technically you've got quite the amount already saved...but what's the purpose?"_

_I slowly turn my gaze to look back at him. He swallows nervously, and glances around before taking another sip of his coffee, and plasters a fake smile on his face._

"_So, um, kind of weird, isn't it? What with Cid and Shera actually married and gone."_

_I nod my head curtly, glancing around._

"_They went to some private cabin about fifty miles down the coastline," he gives a chuckle, "Wonder what they're doing, right now..." _

"_Something personal," I mumble, twisting in my seat to look around._

"_What's up with you?" Reeve asks, "You're acting weirder than normal."_

_I turn my flat gaze back on Reeve, "Thanks."_

"_Seriously, though, you seem...antsy."_

"_I have a bad feeling," I say, shrugging it off._

_Reeve's eyebrow raises, "A bad feeling? What could possibly happen?"_

_Don't say things like that dumbass; after people say stupid things like that its when 'what could possibly happen' happens. Der._

_I narrow my eyes at him, and he changes the subject again._

"_So...the airship should be ready to go in a little while. It's surprising that Cid is actually letting his crew fly it without him."_

"_I don't think Cid knows."_

"_Oh...that's why you think something bad is going to happen."_

_I shrug my shoulders, "Whatever. Thanks, Reeve...can I take that napkin?"_

"_Oh, uh sure thing. If you want a more accurate answer, stop by my office sometime this week, and I'll give you the details."_

"_Right," I say, standing slowly._

"_You sure you're okay, Cloud?" Reeve asks._

"_Yes, I'm fine," I say, turning and walking away._

_I give a wave over my shoulder, heading back towards the resort. _

_Inside the resort I can see Yuffie talking with Tifa and Cecil. Grant is one corner talking to his offspring, and Barret is keeping Denzel and Marlene entertained. Vincent and Nanaki come off the elevator and move towards the desk to check out. That's right, I need to do that. I take a step forward, but am stopped by a small presence._

_Benny._

_He glares up at me, the slightest rosy pink hue on his skin; not to mention the pink tint to his blonde hair. At least Yuffie did one thing right in her lifetime._

"_What?" I ask the boy._

_He narrows his eyes in what he believes a menacing glare before replying, "If this isn't gone by Monday, you and your stupid evil friend are going __**down**__."_

_Empty threats, how I laugh at thee._

_I cross my arms across my chest and glare down at the little pipsqueak._

_He swallows, but stands his ground, "I'm serious. If I have to go to school looking like some type of cotton candy fluff ball, you're both dead."_

_Listen kid, you brought this on yourself. Not my fault._

"_Right," I say, walking past the kid._

"_I'm serious!" he yells as I head for the desk._

_I make it to the desk where Yuffie and Tifa are leaning on it talking to Cecil._

"_Hey," Tifa smiles warmly; she's wearing her blue dress._

_I nod my head at her, and turn to Cecil._

_I pass everything over to Cecil to check out._

"_Oh! I've got to do that too!" Yuffie says, rummaging through her bag and placing a wad of paper on the desk._

_Cecil stares at in disbelief, "Er..."_

_Yuffie grins wide, "Come on, Ce, you can handle it."_

"_I'm going to go see if we're ready to take off," I say, turning from them._

_Outside I learn that it's going to be another half hour before we take off. I sigh, taking our bags up to the airship, and rest on the railing to observe the beach._

_It's a nice moment of peace, but of course when Yuffie is around, such peace is not meant to last._

"_...um...Cloud?" she asks hesitantly, coming to stand behind me._

_I glance at her over my shoulder._

"_Uh...I've done something bad."_

_I narrow my eyes; this does not bode well._

"_What?"_

"_Well..." she pulls on her fingernail._

_...dammit what the hell did she do?_

"_You remember...back when...you and Tifa got stuck in that cave and I had the camera and Vincent said I didn't take a picture but I said I did."_

_Oh hell, "Yes..."_

"_Well...I kinda did take it..."_

_And your point being?_

"_And, well, when I took all that stuff out of my bag, I think it was with that."_

"_Wait, why did you even have that picture?"_

"_To mock you of course, but anyways. So, I went to ask Cecil if he found it, and he said he didn't, but...there had been someone messing with it before he could go through it..."_

_Oh hell, "Who?"_

"_Well..." Yuffie bites her lip._

"_Hey you guys," Tifa comes up beside of us grinning._

_Oh crap oh crap oh crap, "Hey..." _

_Tifa tilts her head, amusement in her eyes, "Your voice squeaked."_

"_No...it didn't," I swallow._

_Damn my squeaky, betraying voice._

_She puts her hands on her hips, "Okay, what's going on...?"_

"_Er..." Yuffie twists to face away from her._

_Oh hell no, I am __**not**__ getting blamed for this crap._

"_It's Yuffie's fault."_

"_Hey!" Yuffie yells, and smacks my arm._

"_Whoa, slow down," Tifa steps between us, "What did you do, Yuffie?"_

"_Hey! How come you automatically assume that it __**is**__ my fault, and that I __**did**__ do something?"_

"_Because you always do something. I'm just trying to figure out if it really is your fault or not," Tifa sighs._

"_Oh," Yuffie says softly, "Well..."_

"_Um, Cloud?"_

_I turn, looking down, "What is it, Denzel?"_

_He glances around frantically, eyeing Tifa nervously, "I...need to talk to you in private."_

_Tifa raises an eyebrow, "Oh?"_

_Denzel shrinks under her gaze, but he grabs my arm and pulls me away from the two. He pulls me around a corner, and ducks his head._

"_Denzel? What's wrong?"_

"_Er...ya see...I um, overheard Yuffie talking about the picture–_

"_What?"_

"_And I know where it is."_

_Oh bless the child, "Where?"_

"_Well," Denzel averts his eyes, "That's the problem. Benny's got it."_

_Oh._

_**OH.**_

_SNAP._

_My teeth grit together, "Where is the boy?"_

"_Ehmahgawd! Benny's got it?!" Yuffie screeches._

_Bitch! She's eavesdropping! Stupid ninja!_

_I turn the corner, almost running straight into Yuffie and Tifa._

_Tifa's brow wrinkles, "Benny's got what?"_

"_Er..." Yuffie mumbles._

_Dammit._

"_It's a picture of you and Cloud in the cave!" Denzel rushes._

_Tifa frowns, "What picture?"_

_Dammit that's right, she was asleep._

"_Uh..."_

"_Cloud, why don't you tell her what picture?" Yuffie asks, crossing her arms._

_You took it bitch! You tell her!_

"_Uh..."_

"_It's a dishonorable picture, that's all I know. I haven't seen it, but that's what Benny said," Denzel says._

"_Wait, wait," Tifa shakes her head, "What cave– oh...no. Wait. Not...the rock cave?" she looks at me with wide eyes._

_I nod my head slowly._

_She's shaking now, "What...does that...picture...?"_

_Yuffie clamps down on Denzel's ears, and barks out, "You're in Cloud's shirt and __**only**__ his shirt and he's squeezing your butt!"_

_Which I bet was kind of flashing the camera._

"_And you could kind of see the cheeks!" Yuffie tacks on._

_DAMMIT._

_Tifa's turning very pale, very, __**very**__ pale. She's shaking now, and she looks at me._

"_Did you know...?"_

_I shake my head._

"_Bullshit! You were awake when I took that picture!"_

_Tifa turns on Yuffie, "So you took it?!"_

"_He squeezed your butt and he was awake!"_

_She looks at me, and I'm at a loss for words._

_I didn't mean to!_

_Well..I didn't mean to right when Yuffie was taking a picture!_

_Crap._

_Tifa glares at me with fire in her eyes, with impending doom for a certain blonde-haired, blue-eyed male._

_I think that's me._

_She's got that 'I'm totally busting out my gloves for this one' look all over her face._

_Oh son of a bitch! Are those her gloves?! Where the hell did she put them in that dress?!_

_As every great warrior knows, there are some battles you know you can win, and some battles you know you will lose. In the second case, you haul ass and get the hell out of there._

_RUN AWAY!_

"_I...have to go ...to the bathroom," I say, grabbing Denzel's shoulder for protection and moving quickly across the floor._

"_Oh no you don't!" Tifa spits, "Get back here Strife!"_

"_Run, Cloud," Denzel hisses out of the corner of his mouth, "I'll hold her back."_

_Denzel, so brave, but I can't do that to him._

"_I can't."_

"_Go!" Denzel hisses._

_Bam! _

"_Oof!" _

_Looks like I didn't get much say in the matter. See, what happened there? Tifa tackled me. We end up on the floor, and my head swims for a moment before I feel a sturdy force on my waist._

_Now she's straddling my waist, and any other time I'd be fine with this, but considering circumstances..._

_This may not end well._

_Now I know why I had a bad feeling._

_She grabs my shirt, "Why didn't you tell me she took a picture?"_

"_It didn't seem important at the time–_

"_What?! I'm a highly respected mother figure in the community, and that scandalous picture is now in the hands of prepubescent boy!_"

_Denzel glances at Yuffie, "What does prepubescent mean?"_

"_You're not old enough, that's what it means," Yuffie mutters._

"_You have got to get that picture back! Both of you! I don't care what it takes! I don't care if he shaves both of your heads!" Tifa says._

"_What?! Why me?!" Yuffie yells._

"_Because you took it! Oh! Oh no! Do you realize that my butt has been exposed to a young boy?! I'm doomed!" Tifa's head falls forward onto my chest._

"_Tifa," I say softly, touching her arm._

_She flinches, her voice muffled through my chest, "Don't touch me."_

"_...You're sitting on top of me."_

"_Shut up, Cloud."_

_I clamp my mouth shut._

"_So! This is how my son got this picture!"_

_Oh bloody freaking hell._

_Tifa sits bolt up, and practically falls off of me._

"_Carla!" Tifa squeaks._

_Yes, it is Carla, dragging her son in by his ear, and a photo clinched tightly in her other hand._

"_I cannot believe you two conduct yourselves this way! And in front of another boy!"_

"_Oh, please, Carla, it...we were asleep! Our friend did it as a joke–_

_Carla covers Benny's ears, "Practically handing out pornographic pictures to small children!" _

_Tifa flushes bright crimson, "It is __**not**__ that extreme."_

_Denzel looks at Yuffie, "What's pornographic mean?" _

_Oh dammit. I am not ready to have that conversation._

_Yuffie squeaks._

_Tifa stands suddenly, "You're just as bad! See what you've done? Exposing my son to that!"_

"_Son?" Denzel asks._

"_Son?" I ask._

"_Son?!" Yuffie squawks._

"_If anyone needs to learn how to be a mother, it is you, ma'am. Discipline your child so that maybe people wouldn't have to dunk him in a vat of pink dye! Maybe then he'd learn it is wrong to take people's things, __**and**__ that it is wrong to shave people's heads!" Tifa vehemently preaches, "Now, me and my family are going to go down stairs, and I'll take that picture!"_

_Carla holds it out blankly, and Tifa takes it sharply._

"_Thank you," she says tartly, "Have a nice day. Come on Cloud, Denzel."_

"_What about me?" Yuffie asks._

_Tifa doesn't even glance over her shoulder, "I'm not talking to you."_

"_I'm still coming!" Yuffie says, darting around Carla._

"_Fine," Tifa grumbles._

_That's my girl...she don't take shit from nobody...nobody._

"_Cloud! Hurry up! I still have my gloves on!"_

_Especially not from me._

**A/N: **I am SO SO sorry it took so long to get this out. I want to hug all of you in apology! I AM SO SORREH! It's just been getting into a grove w/ classes, and drama shrama. UGH. For some reason I find Cloud saying 'Oh snap' highly entertaining. Anyways, I love you all! I'm so tired; I've got to get up at 7, and it's 12:20..ERK! BED TIME. Good night!


	60. Wanted: Rug

_Wanted: Rug_

_Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!_

_Dammit all._

_Beep! Beep! Beep!_

_Alright you stupid alarm clock! Death to alarms everywhere! _

_I lean over, slapping the button to the alarm clock. Back to the normal, daily life of Cloud Strife. Hey, heh, that rhymed. I'm skilled. _

_Mad props...ha._

_I sit up slowly, groaning as I do. It is too early for anyone to be awake. I glance at the clock; it reads four._

_Dammit._

_I..._

_Dammit._

_I can't even think straight yet. I'm thinking diagonally. UGH._

_I yawn, running a hand across my face before swinging my legs off the bed._

_Son of a! Damn, I forgot it's colder here in Edge than Costa del Sol. I need a rug, or some slippers. Freaking cold wooden floor freezing my toes._

_Crap, now I've got to make it all the way across to my bathroom. This will be fun._

_We've been back in Edge for approximately half a day. I know it's going to be hell for Denz and Marlene. They haven't been to school in like a week. Good luck with getting them up, Tifa. Surprisingly enough the trip back to Edge wasn't that eventful. Of course, that's post picture discovery, but that's not important._

_What __**is**__ important is how I still feel guilty about it, and I shouldn't even feel guilty! Yuffie was the one that took that damn picture, therefore, I am absolved of all responsibility. _

_Dammit..._

_Tifa even says she forgives me (though I have no idea what she did with that picture) but I still can't shake it. Sad, huh? I mean, it wasn't even my fault! Stupid ninja..._

_Carla even apologized to Tifa when we were about an hour out from Edge. They talked it over for a while, and when Tifa told Carla that Yuffie was behind it, well, Carla forgave us. She still hasn't forgiven Yuffie, for neither the picture or the pink ball that was her son...course, can't really say I blame her. We've __**all**__ experienced the dangers of one Yuffie Kisaragi. You know, it's strange, you'd figure for the heiress to a country that little scrawny ninja would be a bit mature. But no, of course not. While Wutai is full of traditional, responsible, sensible people, we of course get the crazy one. After generations and generations of great rulers we get stuck with Yuffie._

_It's just my luck, I know. It's all my fault. _

_I sigh, finally standing despite the freezing temperature of my floor. Damn it, rug. I need to put that on a check list._

_If I woke up in Tifa's room, I could stand on a rug..._

_Hmm...there's a question for the books...when are we going to start sharing a room? Should we keep it chaste for the children (and so Barret doesn't kill me) and wait until __**after**__ we get married? Or should I just go hop into her bed tonight when I get home?_

_Questions, questions._

_Anyways, time to get ready._

_Hot shower here I come...I should grab some socks first so my feet don't freeze to the floor, though._

_I think life seems a bit surreal right now. It's very, very strange to imagine Cid and Shera married. They weren't exactly the couple of the year when we first met them...I guess they've come - wait, scratch that. I guess Cid has come a long way since then._

_Oh great, they're going to have a kid too! Crap...I hope it's a girl...or even if it's a boy I hope they take after Shera. I really don't know if we could handle another Cid running around._

_Holy crap, what if __**Yuffie**__ had a kid? That would be terrible...that would be horror movie worthy. Not only can I not see Yuffie having kid, but raising one?! The terror...she would be teaching that kid how to terrorize me from birth. The first words that would come out of their mouth would be 'Torture Cloud'._

_Dude, I hope she never gets married...or never has a kid._

_Dammit..._

_Or what if it was Vincent having a kid? Oh yeah, that kid would be one freaking ray of sunshine right there. I'm at least hoping if one thing goes right with that is that he doesn't take after their father's fashion sense...golden pointy shoes and all._

_Course, I can't really say anything about Barret...either he is a really good parent, or Marlene is just gifted on her own because no kid should be that smart, or perceptive especially after being raised by Barret. Really, it's infuriating what she can figure out before the rest of us._

_...wonder what my kid will be like?_

_...okay, that's just weird...kids...mine...weird._

_Hopefully they'll take after Tifa._

_Anyways._

_It takes about half an hour to get dressed and showered. I have to be quiet about it, if I don't, then I know I'll wake up Tifa. She can be a light sleeper, especially on those mornings I have to leave early, or those nights when I get in really late. I have a sneaky suspicion that she waits up for me on most nights when she really shouldn't. _

_I tiptoe down the steps; I need coffee...awaken me beany substance of delight._

_It is too __**early.**_

_I sigh, waiting for the coffee. I suppose I could try and make breakfast...or settle for a nifty cereal bar._

_...or cereal._

_Woo hoo!_

_Cereal it is._

_It's amazing simple pleasures in life...sugary bits of cereal is one of these. Okay, so it isn't very manly and it really doesn't seem to be the breakfast of champions, but, well, it works..._

_I could blame Zack for my obsession with the sugary, decorative marshmallows. Choco puffs are really good, too; chocolate first thing in the morning is always good!_

_Yeah, right. _

_I think I eat more cereal than Denzel and Marlene put together._

_Don't get me wrong, I enjoy Tifa's cooking as much as the next person, but it's not like I'm going to wake her up at four forty-five in the morning and ask her to cook me breakfast. That's just rude, and inconsiderate._

_...hmm..._

_I should leave soon...I need to be out of here by five. I'll probably end up leaving early, though. Even if I only have to wait around ten minutes, I'll be bored and antsy out of my mind. I hate doing that, waiting for just a few minutes. It's so annoying._

_...still..._

_No, Cloud, don't. You'll wake her up, and she needs her sleep._

_Yeah, but...dammit._

_Just leave._

_No._

_Why not?!_

_Because I need to make up this past week to her, that's why..._

_Dude, and like waking her up before the crack of dawn is really going to help?_

_Shut up dammit._

_I make my way up the steps slowly, poking my head in on the kids. Marlene and Denzel are sleeping peacefully; I hope I never have to wake them before six again._

_That was a chore._

_I shut the door softly, and move into Tifa's room even quieter if that's possible._

_I open the door slowly, peering in to see her in her gown standing by her dresser. She turns quickly; lucky, she's got slippers and a rug._

_I frown, and she smiles at me, her eyes still squinting against the little light from her lamp._

"_Why are you up?" I ask, moving into the room._

_She yawns deeply, "I was going to try and get up early enough to make you breakfast and see you off. I didn't succeed," she grins._

_My frown deepens, "You didn't have to."_

_She shrugs, "Oh I know you can fend for yourself, but I thought it would be nice."_

_I move over towards her, taking her elbow, "Go back to sleep."_

"_Hmm?" she asks blearily._

"_I said go back to sleep...you don't need to be up."_

_She makes to protest, but I lead her over to her bed. She sinks gratefully back into it, slipping her slippers off, and curling up on her side. I watch her for a moment until her eyes close peacefully._

_She sighs deeply, and I brush a bit of hair from her face, causing her lips to perk slightly._

"_You'll be late," she breathes, not even opening her eyes._

_I glance at her clock, dammit, she's right. I knew I shouldn't have come up here for the fact that I wouldn't be able to leave._

_Dammit._

"_I won't be able to go to sleep until you leave," she says in a sing-song voice._

"_Why's that?"_

"_Because, you'll be in late this week mostly, and I have to be awake when you're here while I can."_

"_You won't go to sleep when I leave...you'll get up."_

_She grins mischievously, catching my hand with her own, "But I'll __**tell**__ you I went back to sleep cause that's what you'll want to hear."_

"_And I won't believe you."_

_She grins wide, her eyes opening slowly, "You're going to be late...and if you're late leaving, you're late getting in."_

_My lips press together in a thin line, "Go to bed early tonight."_

"_I'm not going to go to bed till you get home," she yawns._

"_Tonight, just one night."_

_Her brow wrinkles, "Why?"_

_I shrug, "Just because."_

_She raises an eyebrow skeptically, "Am I getting something out of this?"_

_I shrug again, "Won't know till you try."_

"_I better," she grumbles._

"_So, will you really go back to sleep?"_

"_Won't know till you leave," she challenges._

_I give a tiny smirk, leaning down and kissing her temple softly._

_She sighs contentedly, "Fine," she breathes._

* * *

_It is nearly one when I get home, the lights off except for one, and the house is silent._

_I take a quick shower, and change quickly...quicker than I ever done._

_I make my way slowly to my bed, sitting down softly and slipping beneath the covers. I roll softly onto my side, slipping my arm around her waist, and resting my face next to hers._

_She stirs, "Mmm...Cloud?"_

_I grunt in response._

"_What time is it?"_

_"One_._ You didn't wait up."_

_She yawns, rolling in my arms, "You told me not to."_

"_Was it worth it?"_

"_Mmm hmm," she breathes, snuggling deep against my chest, "But I won't be able to fall asleep until you leave..."_

_I sigh, "You'll have to get used to this, then."_

"_Why?" she asks softly, her eyes still closed._

"_Because," I kiss her forehead softly, "I'm going to be here tomorrow night..."_

_She grins, "What about the next night?"_

"_That one too."_

"_And what about the nights after that one?" she asks._

"_Every night."_

_She blushes in the night, but her grin is solid, "Good...question, though..."_

"_Hmm?" I ask, closing my eyes._

"_What if I wanted to sleep in __**your **__bed every night?"_

"_Because this is my bed."_

"_Kuh-loud. You know what I mean," she huffs._

"_Because," I murmur sleepily, "Your room has a rug."_

_And now I can steal your slippers._

**A/N: **If you didn't get that last bit, it was basically Cloud has decided to now sleep in Tifa's room. Why her room? Cos she's got a rug, and slippers he can steal in the morning time when he ventures off the rug. That'd be picture worthy, especially if Tifa has girly slippers. I do, I have monkeys that wear crowns with a hearts on them. THAT would be interesting. Heh, anyways, thanks for the reviews everyone! Do you guys realize we are quickly making our way to our one year anniversary? That's right! Diaries is almost a year old, and now has 60 chapters. We've even got over 1100 reviews! How exciting is that? Hee//Huggles for everyone// Anyways, I have to go finish a couple papers now, so I'll leave you in suspense until next chappie. Love ya!


	61. Genius

**A/N: **Happy anniversary everyone!..er, I know it's a little early but I'm sure you have no complaints XD!!!!!

_Genius_

"_What are you doing?" _

_Tifa glances over her shoulder from the couch, grinning up at me._

"_Not much," she says, slyly closing the magazine in her lap._

_I narrow my eyes, leaning over the back of the couch, "What is that?"_

"_Don't look! You can't see it!" Tifa squeals, clutching the magazine to her chest._

_Yeah, like that's going to stop me._

_I try to grab it, "What is it?"_

"_No! Cloud, stop it. __**Stop**__ Cloud."_

_I sigh, leaning on the back of the couch, "Just tell me what it is."_

_She flushes, looking off to the side, "It's a wedding magazine."_

_I narrow my eyes again, "So why do you have to hide it?"_

"_Be__**cause**__ Cloud, I've circled some of the dresses I like, and I don't want you to see what dresses I like."_

"_Because they're so expensive?"_

_She slaps my arm with the magazine, "No, because it's bad luck for the groom to see the dress."_

_I thought the bride had to be in the dress..._

"_Can't you just let it be a surprise?" she pouts._

_Damnit...the pout. Must...resist..._

_Crap I can't._

_I sigh, straightening, "Fine."_

"_Good man," Tifa grins, folding the magazine beneath her arm and standing._

"_Can you do me a favor?" she asks, poking my chest._

"_What?" I ask._

"_Could you go check on Denzel and Marlene? They need to do their homework...I'm going to go get in the shower."_

_I nod my head, "I'll open the bar for you, too."_

"_Well, aren't you just the gentleman? Thanks," she grins, kissing me once before heading up the steps._

_I follow behind her, going into Denzel and Marlene's room. Marlene is sitting on her bed over some papers and books, and Denzel is at the window._

"_What are you two doing?" I ask._

_Marlene looks up, grinning, "We're doing our homework...well, Denzel is procrastinating. __**I'm **__doing my homework, though."_

"_Denz?" I ask, not even having to elaborate._

"_Fine, fine," he grumbles, turning to sit on his bed._

"_Thanks," I say, keeping my eyes on them as I take a step backwards._

_Marlene glances up, "Cloud! Watch out!"_

_I glance down, spotting Marlene's dollhouse in my path. I step over it, prepared to be successful in my endeavors...but I forgot...I'm Cloud and the world hates me._

_It seems as if Denzel needs a new place for his skateboard, instead of right behind Marlene's bloody dollhouse._

_My foot lands for about three seconds on the skateboard, and I feel myself about to pitch backwards, but I can't do that cause I'll land on Marlene's dollhouse and that'll be tragic; therefore, I have to throw my weight forward, and I go down, Denzel's skateboard shooting out from beneath my foot like a missile._

_There's a crash, and the another crash as I fall forward on my face. Like literally, right on my chin. Ouch._

"_Oh mah gosh! Cloud are you okay?" Marlene puts her hands on her knees and gazes down at me._

_Does it look like I'm okay?_

"_Ew you're bleeding!" Marlene squeals, rearing back._

"_Dude! My skateboard put a hole in the wall! Sweet!"_

"_Denzel!" Marlene yells, "He's bleeding. Ew! EW!"_

"_Calm down Marlene," Denzel says, heading towards us, "Hey, you okay Cloud?"_

_I'm fine...except for my pride. That's a little bruised._

"_Dude, your chin is like, flooding with blood. It looks so cool."_

_And my chin, apparently._

_I put a hand to my chin, feeling the blood on my hand, before standing slowly._

"_Finish your homework," I grunt, moving out of the room._

_I hold my hand to my chin as I move into Tifa's...our room, heh. Tifa comes rushing out of the bathroom with a scanty towel wrapped around her body._

_Score; see, this is what I'm talking about._

"_What happened?" she asks, eyeing my hand on my chin._

_I take my hand off and she winces, "I fell."_

"_I'd say so," Tifa frowns, grabbing my clean hand and pulling me into the bathroom._

_I wash off my face, and Tifa rummages through the cabinets, before holding a band-aid out to me._

_Whoa...I'm not putting a band-aid on my chin, "No."_

_Tifa sighs, putting a hand on her hip, "Cloud, at least until it stops bleeding. Then you can take it off."_

_Dammit. _

_I sigh as she reaches up and puts the band-aid on my chin. My chin...dammit. That's embarrassing._

_I wrap my arms around her as she throws the package away, and she squirms in my hold._

"_You're bleeding," she says, twisting in my arms._

"_You put a band-aid on it," I say, and she frowns._

"_I need a shower."_

"_And..."_

"_Cloud."_

_I lean down, kissing her softly; she kisses me back. Hell yah she can't resist my kisses cause I'm good like that. _

_And all she's got on is this towel..._

_She giggles against my lips when I tug at the knot; not much farther now._

"_Whoa..."_

_Dammit!_

_I break off quickly, Tifa gasping and clutching her towel around her, "Denzel, what is it?"_

_Denzel cackles, "Dude, look at your chin."_

_Tifa grins, pushing me back out of the bathroom, "It is kinda funny, isn't it?"_

_Denzel nods his head, laughing._

"_I'll go open the bar," I grumble, pushing past Denzel._

_I get downstairs, open the bar, and decide to just wash dishes. Seems monotonous enough._

_The door opens, but I don't look up; I'm going to hide my chin._

"_I need to talk to you," I glance up at the voice...dammit._

_Yuffie._

_I narrow my eyes, scrubbing the inside of the glass I'm holding._

"_Why?"_

"_Where's Tifa?" Yuffie squeals, "I've been calling and calling and she won't answer her damn phone!"_

_I stare at her, "Tifa's in the shower."_

_Yuffie suddenly blinks, staring at my face, "What happened?"_

_Dammit, she noticed. _

"_...I fell..."_

"_Why'd ya fall?" Yuffie asks, leaning on the bar._

_Keep up idiot, "I slipped..."_

"_But why?!" _

_Because I'm gravity's bitch and gravity was like, "Hey bitch! Get down here!" That's why!_

_I glare at Yuffie, my eye's narrowing, "Did you want something?"_

"_Yes! I told you I wanted to talk to Tifa, but she's in the shower so I can't!" she yells, tossing her arms up in frustration._

_I stare at her, rubbing on the glass, and she stares back at me, breathing heavily._

"_Well, aren't you going to ask me?"_

"_Ask you what?"_

"_Why I'm so distressed!" she screeches, "I need womanly advice and the only damn woman I really know is Tifa and she's in the shower! Geeze, Cloud, haven't you been listening at all?"_

"_What about Shera?"_

"_Oh she's corrupted," Yuffie leans on the bar, defeated, "She's married to __**Cid**__ of all people...and she's married! And there's only one thing I hate almost as much as I hate marriage and that is weddings, and she made me attend a wedding and wear a dress! So no, I cannot talk to Shera."_

_I pick up another glass to wash, just staring at her._

"_Just ask me! Please! I need to rant!"_

_Dammit...what do I do? If I don't ask her, she's going to keep nagging me...but I'm afraid if I ask her it'll never stop... I don't know if I want to know what's wrong or what has made her this distressed._

_Dammit, screw you curiosity, "What, Yuffie?"_

"_Reno __**hit **__on me!" she screeches._

_My eyes go wide and I drop the glass._

_It bounces on the counter, and I scramble to right it and catch it. _

"_What?" I hiss._

_Yuffie's eyes are wide, her fingers clutching the air desperately, "YES! He __**hit**__ on me!"_

_I stare at her, "How?"_

"_He __**hit**__ on me!"_

_I understand that! Tell me what happened idiot! How did he hit on you?!_

"_H-he-he saw me at the movie theater, kay? So I'm all like, listen pal, what's up? Cos I don't really care about Reno, I mean, he's Reno, and he __**knows**__ not to hit on me cos I'm Yuffie, and that's just how one and one goes together and he __**hit on me**__."_

_You saw him at the movies...now what?_

_But really, is it that shocking? I mean, Reno...well, he's a man-whore. _

"_But...Reno...always..."_

"_I know he flirts with anything that has two legs and a pair of breasts but I don't!"_

"_Don't what?" I frown._

"_Have breasts! They're tiny! Look at these things!" she shouts, pointing at her chest, "I'm like a freaking 'A'. Hell, I'm not even an A! I'm a bloody 'barely A'! I don't even need a bra!"_

_Dude, where did the 'Reno hit on me' crap go? How did we get to talking about her bra size? I don't care about her chest, or lack there of!_

"_What happened?"_

"_He hit on me! He said...flirty things!_"

"_...is this a bad thing?"_

"_Yes! It's bad cos he's Reno for pity's sake! Re-e-e-no!"_

_Yeah, I got that much...I guess that's a good point. I mean, it is Reno...I don't want Yuffie to date Reno...that would be a little too close to home for me._

"_So what did you do?" I ask, my curiosity getting the best of me again, which is never a good thing when Yuffie is concerned._

_Yuffie looks at me incredulously, "Well I called him ShinRa scum and I punched him on the nose of course! Anybody would've done the same thing!"_

_She did...what?! Go Yuffie! You've done something right for once!_

"_You punched him?" I ask dubiously._

"_Yes! Don't you believe me? I freaking punched him on the nose!" she yells._

_She suddenly puts her elbows on the counter, and buries her hands in her hair in desperation and she groans._

_Something is not right._

"_Uh...Yuffie?"_

"_Why did I punch him?" she moans._

_Wait...wasn't this a good thing? Weren't we celebrating this a moment ago?_

"_What?"_

_Yuffie's head shoots up, "I said, why did I punch him?"_

_Because he's Reno and we all hate him?_

"_Uh..."_

"_I mean," Yuffie sighs, turning sideways before glancing at me, "He's the first guy that's hit on me in ages, and I mean __**ages**__, Cloud, like you wouldn't believe."_

_Yeah, but... "He's Reno..."_

"_Exactly! Have you looked at Reno lately?"_

_What? "No..."_

"_He's hawt stuff! Suddenly Reno is desirable!"_

_Why? Since when is drunken, chain smoking, sloppy Reno any type of desirable? I'm not even a woman and I understand this much._

"_That doesn't make any sense," I say._

"_I know," Yuffie's eyes flash expressively, "That's why I'm so damn confused! He shouldn't be desirable! What do I do, Cloud? What do I do?!" she pleads, dropping her head on the bar, and clasping her hands before her face._

_Why? What do I do? I mean, I don't know how to handle these situations!_

_Tifa! Tifa save me!_

"_Uh..."_

"_I mean, Cloud, he's...he's Reno! I should hate him! I don't know what to do!"_

"_Uh..."_

"_Maybe I should call him back? No, he wouldn't answer...I could apologize I guess, but I don't think...I just don't think he'd accept it..."_

"_Uh..."_

_Her eyes brighten suddenly, "Maybe I should hit on him!"_

_WHAT?! No!_

"_Uh...why?"_

"_Because Cloud, I haven't been hit on in ages!"_

"_What about the wedding?"_

"_That doesn't count," Yuffie waves her hand, dismissive._

"_Why not?"_

"_Because that was a __**wedding**__, Cloud. No one that hooks up at weddings stays hooked up, kay? Get with the picture, geeze."_

_Sorry if I'm not educated in these types of dealings..._

"_I'll hit on him, turn the tables on him! Make him feel what it's like to be completely emotionally upchucked like that!"_

_Doesn't that defeat the purpose, though? I mean, didn't she want to prove to him that she doesn't want to be hit on by him? Isn't that like mixed signals or some crap like that?_

_I'm so confused..._

"_Hey Yuffie, what's up?" Tifa smiles, stepping behind the bar beside of me._

_Her hair is wet, and she smells like strawberries._

"_Tifa, ehmahgawd I'm going to hit on Reno!" Yuffie squeals._

_Tifa's eyes go wide, "What?!" _

_Finally! Someone that sees the light! Talk her out of it, Tifa! _

_Tifa grabs Yuffie's arms, a big grin splitting her face, "That is __**awesome**__."_

_What?! No! Tifa stop! That is not awesome! It's anything but awesome! That's like...ex-awesome! No!_

"_I know, right?"_

_Wait...wait, what?!_

_I stare at them perplexed...I've missed something here._

"_When?" Tifa asks, her eyes bright._

"_The next time I see him!"_

_What the hell is going on here?_

"_What's brought about this?" Tifa asks, leaning on the bar._

"_Well, I already told Cloud. He's the one who told me to hit on Reno."_

"_What?" Tifa squawks._

_Yeah, what she said!_

"_Well, not really," Yuffie says waving her hand, "But he hit on me and I punched him on the nose."_

"_Who hit on you?" Tifa asks, "Cloud?"_

_What?! No!_

"_No!" I say before Yuffie can get it out._

_Don't insult me like that woman!_

_Yuffie snickers, and Tifa shrugs, turning her attention back to Yuffie._

"_So, what are you going to do?"_

"_I have no idea," Yuffie says, shaking her head dramatically, "I don't think the normal flirtation will work on him..."_

"_Or, it might work __**too**__ good. He's such a flirt himself," Tifa says, sighing._

"_Really?"_

"_Well, it's mostly just when he's drunk. When he's sober, he can remember that Cloud and I are together and Cloud would willingly kill him. It's when he's drunk that he becomes a man-whore."_

_See, I told you he was a man-whore, but besides that, how often has Reno been stopping around here? And what does drunk Reno forget? Should I stick around more often?_

"_Really?" Yuffie asks._

_Yeah, really?_

_I should learn Reno's drinking schedule...prevent these encounters from happening..._

"_Sure. Oh, oh look, Rude's coming in...maybe...maybe we can get Reno in here today..." Tifa says, spotting Rude through the window._

_Rude walks in, pausing at the doorway; he's probably a bit unnerved by the way Yuffie and Tifa are staring at him and whispering._

_He makes his way slowly over towards us, sitting down beside of Yuffie cautiously. Yuffie and Tifa are still staring at him._

"_Want the usual, Rude?" Tifa asks finally._

_Rude gives a silent nod of his head as Tifa reaches beneath the bar to get his drink._

_Yuffie glances at Rude slyly, "Speaking of the usual, where's Reno?"_

"_Uh..." Rude is at a loss._

_Tifa returns with his drink, leaning onto the bar. Yuffie and Tifa both stare at him with the most ...I can't even explain it. It's like the ultimate puppy dog look, except it's coming from both of them. Rude's a goner._

"_Say, Rude, can you do us a favor?" Tifa asks, pouting._

_Stop pouting! _

"_Sure, I suppose."_

_No! Say no! Fight the pout man, fight it!_

_I glare at Rude from over Tifa's head, shaking my head slowly as to not alert Yuffie. I can't tell if he's even looking at me though, dammit, since he's got those damn sunglasses on!_

_Yuffie grins, "Could...you uh, ya know...call up Reno for us?"_

_Rude frowns, "Why? Reno will be here in a minute. He's meeting me here."_

_It's like a whirlwind; they brush past us and head to the other end of the bar, conspiring with low whispers and paranoid glances._

_Oh great...here they go._

_Rude turns his head towards me, "What's...going on?"_

_I guess Reno didn't tell Rude about Yuffie punching him._

_I best answer truthfully, "I have no idea."_

_I have no idea why anyone would want to hit on Reno._

_...ew._

_The door opens, and I glance up towards it. It's him, Reno, he's here and he has no idea what's going to happen to him. He's going to be pounced on. I have half a mind to chuck the glass I'm holding at him...maybe that'll scare him away._

_Reno saunters into the bar, a hand in his pocket, and the other one grasping a slushy_. _He slurps on it loudly as he makes his way over to the bar._

_Suddenly Yuffie is beside of him, beaming up at him. He flinches, staring at her. Tifa moves up beside of me, leaning on the bar to watch with interest._

"_I don't know if this will work..." Tifa says softly._

"_Why? Because he can't forgive her for punching him on the nose?" I ask._

_Rude swiftly turns his head to look at us, and Tifa sighs._

"_Nope," she says shaking her head, "Because she's Yuffie and she's bound to mess this up."_

_That was harsh...but probably true._

_Rude turns his head back to watch the proceedings._

_Suddenly it looks like Reno's accusing Yuffie of something (surprise surprise) and Yuffie's saying something vehemently._

_It happens in a split second. One moment, Reno's slurping on his slushy, the next..well, the next it's sitting on Yuffie's head._

_Yuffie screams, and Reno flinches, but holds his ground. They exchange heated words, and we all stare in disbelief. After a minute, Yuffie stomps her foot loudly._

"_Fine!"_

"_Fine!" Reno says, tossing his hands up into the air._

_He turns sharply, heading for the door as Yuffie takes the cup off her head, crushing it in her hands, and heads back over to the bar._

_Tifa frowns, "Oh, Yuffie...I'm so sor–_

"_I've got a date Friday night!" she grins wide._

_What?!_

_Rude chokes on his drink._

"_Really?" Tifa asks dubiously._

"_Yup, and all thanks to my genius."_

_Yeah, right...your genius. That's __**exactly **__what it was. That's why you ended up with a slushy on your head._

"_Dude, Tifa, can I thieve some of your sexy clothes?"_

_No, you may not thieve Tifa's sexy clothes. Tifa, say no._

"_Sure! Come on! Cloud, watch the bar," Tifa says, grabbing Yuffie's hand and jerking her towards the steps._

"_We need to wash your hair first."_

"_Oh, can I use your strawberry shampoo?"_

_No! Stop! Stop! I don't need you to wear Tifa's clothes and try and smell like her!_

"_Oh sure, Yuffie."_

_Dammit..._

_I sigh turning to face Rude as I scrub on a glass. How long have I been scrubbing this glass?_

_Never mind that; Rude's freaking staring at me._

"_What?"_

"_Cloud..." Rude speaks softly._

"_Huh?" I grunt._

"_What happened to your face?"_

_I sigh; bastard. I had forgot about that._

_Man...forget this. I'm going to go kick Yuffie out and tell Tifa to put the towel back on._

**A/N: **So, I wanted to do something special for the anniversary...but I didn't know what...so Yuffie and Reno magically popped up and were like rawr. It was fun, and I tried to make this chapter long. Originally it started out with Yuffie coming in the bar, but I added on. I fell the other day. I scraped my foot up. It hurt. I had to go out and buy giant ass bandaids. It was an adventure. Anyways...SURPRISE!

**zenbon zakura: **Heh, I need new slippers; and Cloud will eventually get around to theiving Tifa's!  
**Sabith: **I hope this was special enough! I couldn't think of anything else Thanks alot!  
**AzNAnGeL07: **If you can find a priest to wed you to this story, I suppose that's fine by me! XD  
**Altais: **It's okay! I'm glad you like it!  
**annomynous: **OMG I know...Yuffie w/ a kid is scarrrrrrry! Not as scarry as the wrath of Barret though O.o  
**sam: **Thanks so much! I'm glad to motivate the inner cloti in anyone. It's fun XP  
**Alice001: **He isn't a morning person; I hate getting up early too.  
**Summer Jasmine: **Quit giving me ideas! Oh man, that would be pure torture for Cloud...not to mention the fact she'd probably be carrying a camera  
**x.one.winged.angel.x: **Pink bunny slippers...big fluffy ears. Oh yeah, that's manly  
**Toons: **I'm glad you understood that! I wasn't sure if it was clear or not. I wish I had squeaky slippers...or slippers that used to squeak!  
**Admiral Andalite: **Heh, was this torture enough for him? I hope sure hope so for his sake.  
**Tibbar Sabertooth: **Fluffiness is good for the heart though: ). Thanks!  
**Duderman: **Thanks so much! I'm always glad when people say Cloud is in character  
**ishmaranara: **Oh? Cold is good...it's finally a bit cool here. I'm so happeh! I hope one day you enjoy snow; everyone should XD  
**Zaz9-zaa0: **HAHA! I couldn't put Cloud in my slippers; I like them too much to give 'em up!  
**Shugoshin No Sora: **That's a good idea; I'll have to work that in somewhere XD The Morning of the Slipper Wars Cue dramatic music  
**Kohryu: **Thanks so much!  
**karin23: **Thanks! I hope you enjoy this chapter!  
**lady Alexas: **Thanks!  
**Raito Akuma: **Glad you love it! XD  
**Princess of Queens: **It would : )


	62. Super Freak

_Super Freak_

_I hate my life._

_Well, not really, but really...okay, that doesn't make any sense what so ever, but what else is new? And who the hell cares whether or not the inner workings of my mind are not sensible? I don't care. _

_Tifa is sitting at the bar, thumbing through a book; Cid's here too, sipping on some drink. He looks sort of forlorn. I guess I'd be too if I had to leave the sunny shores of Costa del Sol for Rocket Town. HA! Cid's married...that's an entertaining thought._

_I'm behind the bar; how the hell did I get behind the bar once again? I have no freaking clue, but I am. I guess it's cause there's next to no one here. Tifa's too busy waiting on Yuffie anyways._ _Yuffie went out with Reno last night...yeah, can't wait to hear this one. If they started the relationship with bodily harm and slushy throwing, one can only imagine the carnage they caused actually going on a __**date.**_

"_Teeeefah," Cid drawls._

_I think he's had one to many._

_Tifa glances up from her book, "Yeah Cid?"_

"_I need mo'," Cid makes a crude gesture at his empty glass._

_Tifa sighs, lifting her book back up to her eyes, "I think you're good Cid."_

_Cid grumbles something before staring down at the empty glass._

_Huh, the last time I saw Cid drunk was at his bachelor party...oh yeah, like that was lots of fun, dragging his drunk ass up to his hotel room. I supress a sigh as I pick up another glass._

"_Cloud..." Cid says slowly, "Cloud...Cloud...Cloud...Cloud..."_

"_What Cid?" I ask._

"_I need more," Cid gestures at his glass again._

"_Cid–_

"_Why are you behind the bar anyways? Isn't that Tifa's job? Isn't she the bartendin' gal?"_

_Tifa sighs, pushing off her stool and putting her book on the counter. She reaches across picking up Cid's glass._

"_No more."_

"_You aren't the bartender, Cloud is. He can tell me when I can't have any more, ain't that right, Spike?"_

_Hm, "No more."_

_Cid slaps the counter, "That's not fair!"_

_I shrug, turning my attention back to the dishes._

_Tifa walks up beside of me, bumping her hip against mine, "Thanks for doing the dishes. I'll take over after Yuffie gets here and gets done talking."_

_I shrug; it's been kind of quiet around her lately. Barret took Marlene and Denzel out for the day, and obviously Yuffie's been too preoccupied to show up around here._

"_So you two decided on a date yet?" Cid asks, suddenly sort of sober._

_I narrow my eyes, Tifa glancing at him._

_She gives a little smile, "No...I don't think we're in a hurry."_

_Cid snorts, glancing around, "Yeah, right..."_

_I narrow my eyes and Tifa just shakes her head._

"_I hope you get married soon so I won't be the __**only **__one stuck in this thing called marriage."_

"_How is married life, Cid?" Tifa asks._

_Cid snorts again, and Tifa gives a sly smile, "Oh you know you love it Cid, don't try and lie."_

"_I just gotta stop smokin...I'm about to go bloody crazy, you have no friggin idea," Cid growls._

"_Oh that's right," Tifa smiles softly, "How is Shera?"_

"_Bloody moody...Spike, when you gonna knock her up so we can suffer together?"_

"_Hey!" Tifa shouts, her face flushing._

_...I can't even begin to process that information right now._

"_I just wanna be able to make fun of this guy more than usual, that's all," Cid shrugs._

_Gee, thanks Cid...thanks a lot._

_Tifa sighs, putting her hand on her hip, "Cid, being married is special, so is having a baby."_

"_Special? Yeah, I guess that's one thing to call it..."_

_Tifa shakes her head and prepares to say something else, but that's about the time Yuffie bursts through the door. All three of our heads snap up as she stands there with the door against the wall; she's got one hand gripped on the door frame, and the other is still up against the door. She's about to hyperventilate I think..._

_It's kind of strange seeing her dressed like a normal girl...I mean, she's wearing jeans...when was the last time I saw her wearing jeans? I mean, I know I saw her in a dress at Cid's wedding (which was scarring enough) but she's carrying a purse...a bloody big purse too, some deep, purple leather purse that looks like it could be big enough for Conformer to fit in. Actually, it wouldn't surprise me if Conformer was in there and that was the only reason why she was carrying it._

_Cid just stares at her before reaching across the bar and grabbing a drink from beneath it; I don't even think he knows what it is...or he might just not even __**care**__ what it is._

"_Yuffie?" Tifa asks tentatively._

_That seems to break the spell. All the blood rushes to Yuffie's face and she suddenly stops breathing, her body still tense._

"_Yuffie?" Tifa asks again._

"_Oh. My. God. I. Will. Kill. Him."_

"_Yuffie?" _

_She suddenly lurches forward and stumbles into the bar. Tifa flinches backwards as Cid pops the cap of his beer off._

"_Hey brat," he mumbles at her._

_Yuffie makes her way to the bar, before collapsing up against it, ignoring Cid's degrading comment._

_Tifa leans over the bar, her brow wrinkled with concern, "Yuffie, are you okay?"_

"_Who ya going to kill? Mullet boy?" Cid asks, and chuckles at his own joke._

_I pick up a glass and begin to dry it. I swear, our lives could possibly be the most entertaining thing ever. There's never anything normal about it. Everyone I know is crazy._

"_Yuffie, what is it?" Tifa puts a hand on her shoulder._

_Yuffie snaps._

"_He's such a bloody frickin tease! The asshole! I __**hate **__him!"_

_HA!_

"_So, I take it no second date?" Cid grunts._

_Yuffie's sudden rage dies as quickly as it's born. Her face falls, and she frowns, deeply perplexed._

"_No...some how...some where...there was a second date planned..."_

_Cid's eyebrow raises, his lips still on his bottle, "Orly?"_

"_What?" Yuffie hisses._

"_Oh really?" Cid ventures, snickering slightly, "You got conned by Reno, huh? What'd he do? Make ya pay for dinner?"_

"_No..." Yuffie breathed, "He was the perfect gentleman...I __**hate **__him! He should've been rude or crude or said nasty things or stared at the waitress and he didn't and he led me on and when I tried to kiss him he __**denied me**__. Me! ME?! Yes, me! __**He**__ denied __**me**__. Where in that picture does that equation go wrong boys and girls?!"_

"_Wait, slow down," Tifa says, waving her hands._

_Wait, yes, slow down...I think I heard something about a second date and kissing denying...or something like that._

_I don't even think I can form words at this point and time._

"_Wait...you kissed Reno?" Cid asks._

"_Tried," Yuffie sighs, defeated._

"_Why?" That was me...yep, I just had to open my big mouth._

_Yuffie's teeth grind together; I swear I think I heard them crack._

_Suddenly she's launching herself across the bar, her feet hanging off the ground so she can lean her upper half across the bar. She then proceed to pummel me with her big purple purse._

"_You!" Whack! "Jack!" Whack! "Ass!" WHAM! "I'll!" Twhack! "Kill!" Whack! "You!" _

_Killed._

_Ouch._

_SON OF A BITCH._

_Weren't you supposed to kill Reno?!_

_Tifa pushes Yuffie back, where she hits the floor with a soft thud. Yuffie huffs, slinging the straps of her purse onto her shoulder, and crossing her arms._

_She seethes at me._

"_I __**tried**__ to kiss him because he sent me all the right signals," she huffs. "That's it...I'm not going on a second date with him. I'll just ignore his phone calls and see how he likes having all the right signals and not the right product."_

_Well, then what was the point in going out him with the first place? You should've just skipped the first date and went straight to ignoring him. Sounds like a plan to me._

"_Yuffie," Tifa starts slowly, "Are you sure you went out on a date with...Reno?"_

"_Yes!" Yuffie's voice raises an octave, "I know it's hard to believe, but he took me on a date and he didn't try and get in my pants!"_

"_Wonder why," Cid mutters into his bottle._

_I had forgotten about him._

_However, Yuffie seems to react to this about as well as me asking her why she even attempted to kiss Reno. Ew._

_Yuffie's face turns red again, and she draws up her entire five foot ...no inches, her five foot stature and begins the ultimate smack down. I swear, that purple purse is a more effective weapon than Conformer ever was._

"_You idiot!" She brings the purse up over her head, and brings it down over the back of Cid's head._

"_Ow! Scrawny bitch!"_

"_You jackass! I hate you all! Mocking me like this!" Yuffie screeches, continuing her beat down. _

"_Listen, it's not my fault he didn't find you appealing!" Cid shouts, holding his hands out to protect his head._

_Yuffie freezes, dropping the purse onto the ground suddenly, "Ehmahgawd you're right."_

"_Hell yah I am," Cid slowly comes out from the cover of his arms._

_Yuffie gives another defeated sigh, glancing around, "I'm an __**idiot**__. He just did that so he could...date me, and say I've been with the great ninja Yuffie Kisaragi."_

_Cid shrugs, "Then why didn't he get in your pants?"_

_Yuffie glares at him, "Like I would've even __**let**__ him," she sighs, "I guess he knew I'd kill him when I found out he played me, and actually touched me."_

"_Right, that's it," Cid grunts sarcastically._

_Cid, you're probably about to die._

_Yuffie's eyes light up mischievously, "So, Cid, how's married life?"_

_Cid snorts, "Ha! Married life..."_

_Cid reaches into his back out, slipping out a pack of cigarettes, and a lighter._

"_Cid, I thought you were quitting," Tifa says, crossing her arms._

"_I am," Cid shrugs, before grinning, "Inside the house. My first cig in two weeks...I'll tell you what's married life, not escaping her fecking hormonal fueled nose that can smell cigarette smoke three miles away."_

"_You shouldn't smoke that," Yuffie sings._

"_Does it look like I care?" Cid asks, slightly muffled by the cigarette hanging out of his mouth._

_Cid picks up the lighter with shaky hands, running his thumb across it once...twice...thrice...failure!_

_Cid growls, putting his cigarette and lighter on the bar, "Tifa, you got a lighter I can use?"_

"_Uh," Tifa reaches into her back pocket, "Yeah here."_

_Tifa pulls out her lighter and Cid takes it gratefully. He reaches down for his cigarette but only touches smooth wood. He doesn't look down, just slides his hand across...of course, after about five seconds of this he realizes not only is his cigarette not there, but his lighter, and his pack of cigarettes._

_Oh crap._

_There's a soft 'shck!' and the smell of cigarette smokes wafts into the air._

_Cid's fists clinch, and he turns slowly, his nostrils raising slightly at the scent. He spots Yuffie leaning against the far wall, his pack of cigarettes in one hand, the lighter which is working by the way, held to the cigarette in her mouth._

_Cid turns purple._

_Yuffie takes a deep drag on the cigarette, before blowing it out through her nose, and gives a triumphant yet lackadaisical look at Cid._

"_Man," she gives a dramatic sigh, dropping the barely used cigarette to the floor, "I __**really **__needed that...after all that stress...man, talk about your stress reliever."_

_Toe down...grind, grind-ground._

"_Hey, watch my floor Yuffie," Tifa scolds._

_Has she not even noticed Cid? I mean...he's purple, as purple as Yuffie's bag and–_

_Oh God he's gone._

"_Cid!" Tifa yells, but it's too late._

_Here...let me explain this better._

_If some innocent customer were to walk in the door right now, they might see this..._

_An aging, balding pilot whose currently purple and cigarette deprived chasing a crazed, manic ninja with a klepto complex that may lead to her death; they also might would see poor Tifa chasing the two of them trying to reduce the destruction to her bar, and then they'd see me._

_Me who is standing behind the bar drying a glass with about as much interest in this as paint drying._

_I mean, really, yeah, it's entertaining but how the hell is this surprising? I mean, it's expected that these people are going to act idiotically._

"_Yuffie! You little–get back here! I'm going to slaughter you! And you're indifferent boyfriend bitch!"_

"_Ha! You have to catch me first! Hear that wheezing?! That's because of these babies!" Yuffie yells, shaking the pack in her hand._

_I can't handle this right now._

"_Ah ha ha!!" Yuffie cackles, rushing past the bar, Cid following close behind._

_Tifa has given up; she sits down at the bar to watch along with me._

_I have an idea._

_Since the towel plan the last time Yuffie was here didn't work, well, I'll make it work this time._

_They're coming around for another lap; I step out from behind the bar, Tifa watching me with a confused look._

_Yuffie's charging at me, a big grin plastered on her face._

_She isn't expecting this._

_As she rushes past me, I reach down hooking my arm around her waist, and pinning her beneath my arm against my side. She screams, more shocked than anything, and I have time to reach down and grab the cigarettes and lighter out of her hands._

_Cid's coming now, too fast to stop._

_That's okay._

_I take a step to the left, and leave my foot out. He hits it, and does a face plant onto the floor, sliding across it._

_That'll probably leave a mark._

_Yuffie begins to yell obscenities as I head for the door. I kick it open, registering the fact that Cid has now regained his footing and is charging at me. _

_I drop Yuffie on the ground where she shouts indignantly before I throw the cigarettes and lighter out onto the street._

"_Bastard!" Cid screams, diving out the door after them._

_I pick up Yuffie by the collar of her shirt, and dump her out onto the sidewalk._

"_Hey!" Yuffie screams, but she's cut off as I slam the door in her face._

_I flip the lock, but that's about the time that a ring tone starts up from the giant purple purse._

"_...That girl is pretty wild now  
__The girl's a super freak  
__The kind of girl you read about  
__In new-wave magazine  
__That girl is pretty kinky.  
__That girl's a super freak  
__I really love to taste her  
__Every time we meet.  
__She's all right, she's all right  
__That girl's all right with me, yeah  
__She's a super freak, super freak  
__She's super-freaky, yow!"_

_I resist the urge to curse as I see who is calling._

_Reno._

_I answer "Just one moment."_

"_Strife?" he asks, confused._

_I unlock the door and open it, surprised to see Yuffie still sitting there in shock._

_I throw the phone at the back of her head, and drop her purse on the ground beside of her._

"_Ow! Bastard!"_

"_Reno called," I say, and she squeals, diving for the phone._

_Now I shut the door and lock it for a final time, flipping the open sign to close._

_Tifa watches me from across the room with her eyebrows raised, an amused expression on her face._

"_That was a little...extreme..." she giggles._

_I walk straight up to her and she smiles again._

"_Why did you lock the door?" she asks._

_No need for explanations I feel. I think it's pretty easy to figure out._

_Without a word to her I wrap my arms around her and sling her over my shoulder._

"_Cl–Cloud! Put me down! Cloud what are you doing?! Cloud! Cloud!"_

_Tifa flops around, smacking my back as I head up the steps._

**A/N: **Bwha! I'm alive! I know, it's been awhile, but classes are kicking my ass. And! I went to the beach this past weekend! Talk about heavenly...though, I think I gained three pounds. My grandma must stop cookin the sweets...UGH! Also, my birthday was the 8th! Yes, Horky is officailly 19. Woo, celebrate. There were some problems apparently w/ last chapter and Denzel speak. I see it as little boys find blood and destruction fun...thus the 'dude' and 'sweet'. He's a hippy LMAO I don't remember who said that but I about died...twas great.

Anyways, this chapter was spontaneous...all that in the begining was just a prelude so that I could get Yuffie stealing Cid's cigs. I don't know if the coupling w/ Reno and Yuffie will continue. I don't care, this isn't they're story. I might mention Yuffie's romantics in passing, but I really don't know how that's going to go. Sorry if ya don't like it, but since it isn't a main focus I hope you all stick around. Also, that last bit, I hope you got that. Cloud was lusting (o la la!) I always felt that if Cloud wanted the smexes and just got suddenly lustful, he'd just pick Tifa up and carry her off...not even tell her...just take her. Course, I'm sure this would happen only if they were in a regular sexual relationship. I don't think it'd be like that if they were just chillin at the bar one day as friends, and Cloud just picked her up silent like and carried her into the bedroom...though that might be friggin hilarious XD

I can always tell when you guys get impatient for another chapter cos the view count for chapter 61. was like 200 more than 60. LMAO, I'm sorry guys, I'll try and be better about it. I love you! Thanks for all the reviews, lovelys. You guys rock my world. XP


	63. GO GET 'EM TIGER

_Go Get 'Em Tiger_

_Rocket Town is unusually quiet today I note after I head out of the Inn. There are no noises coming from Cid's shop for some reason, and that perturbs me. Cid is a pretty scheduled guy, and about this time daily he should be out in his shop tinkering with something._

_But he isn't..._

_So what __**is**__ he doing? I suppose I could be neighborly and stop in and see him. I wonder if this has anything to do with Shera's pregnancy..._

_Possibly._

_I shrug before heading over to Cid and Shera's house. It appears quiet from the outside, but one can never tell anything by appearances when it comes to Cid. That's for sure._

_I sigh before hesitating and knocking on the door._

"_Comin'!" I hear Cid shout through the door._

_Great...he's here._

_The door swings open and my brow furrows._

_Cid grunts, chewing on a plastic spoon, "Spike...what are you doin all the way out here?"_

_I stare at him, before gesturing vaguely over my shoulder, "Delivering a package..." _

_My eyes widen slightly, "What the hell are you wearing?"_

_Cid glances down, "Oh yeah...forgot about that."_

_Over his normal attire Cid is wearing an apron...and it's not just any apron, it's a yellow one with ruffles and across his chest is written 'Coffee, tea, or me?'_

_...yeah...I'm taking that as some sexual connotation right there._

_Ugh...mind obliterated._

"_It's Shera's...got it for her for her birthday last year."_

_So why the hell are you wearing it?_

"_...uh..."_

"_Just taking a little break...she was feeling a little tired, so I'm making her some tea and biscuits."_

_Damn this is wrong._

_Cid in an apron that offers himself..._

_Oh crap mental images._

_And since when does Cid play the dutiful husband? Making biscuits? Does Cid even know how to spread butter?_

_Butter...smooth Strife, smooth like butter. Heh, forgot about that one._

"_Get in here idiot...I gotta favor to ask ya."_

_Shit._

_I head hesitantly into the house, Cid leading me to the kitchen still in that creepy apron. Cid pauses at the table to take off his apron, er, Shera's apron, and hangs it on a hook. There's a little plate of biscuits and a cup of steaming tea. Cid motions for me to follow him again before he picks up the plate and cup._

"_Wait right here," he says out in the hallway, before going through one of the doors._

_I nod my head in response, before glancing around the empty hallway. I can hear Cid and Shera's voices muffled through the door, but something is distracting me. I smell something...something rather strong and it isn't tea or biscuits. Hell it isn't even coffee or Cid._

_I take a couple sniffs trying to figure out what it is. I lean further down the hall, the scent getting stronger as I sniff._

_Wait here he says..._

_...screw it._

_I need to figure out what this smell is._

_I move further down the hall and to the last door on the right. My hand hesitates over the door knob, before twisting it and opening the door. The thick, overwhelming scent of wet paint feels my nose, and I gag slightly. The windows are shut, no wonder._

_I move across the room and ease the windows open slightly._

_The room is painted a soft pink, paler than Aerith's dress. They can't already know it's a girl, can they? I mean, it's too soon. I'm certainly not a pregnancy guru, but I'm pretty sure that thing inside of Shera pretty much resembles a sea monkey right about now._

"_You can't freaking wait for anything can you, punk?"_

_I turn quickly._

_Cid raises an eyebrow, "What?"_

"_Girl?"_

"_You better fecking believe it."_

"_How do you–_

_I don't get the sentence out though. Cid chucks a paintbrush at me._

"_Get to work bum."_

_Well crap._

_I'm assuming this is the favor._

_

* * *

_

_How did I get into this situation? How do I get into these situations __**period**_

_Oh yeah...I forgot._

_I'm the world's bitch._

_Cid grunts, straightening before slapping the paint brush against the wall...the pink paint splattering slightly._

_The bastard has gotten my entire clothes splattered in paint. Pink freaking paint...paint doesn't come out of clothes to easily. I'm almost scared to bring these clothes home to Tifa, if not for her scolding of getting perfectly good clothes covered in pink than for her teasing that it's bloody __**pink**__. I'm tempted to burn these...they can join the ashes of the blue boxers._

_Bastard._

_Bastard._

_Bastard._

"_You say somethin?" Cid growls, chewing on a toothpick now._

"_No," I grumble back._

_When I arrived here today in Rocket Town I hadn't expected to be in this situation. Course, usually one never expects to be in the situations I get in. _

_I was just delivering a package to the inn here, and I decided to be sociable and stop in and see them._

_And now I'm painting a room pink._

_I still don't know how Cid talked me into this._

_Maybe it was Shera..._

"_What happens if it's a boy?" I ask, bringing the roller up against the wall._

"_It won't be..." Cid growls, "Everyone in my family has called what the child is. I call a girl, it'll be a girl. Carla called a boy, and we got Benny."_

_Demon spawn._

"_My parents called a boy, and they got me."_

_Demon spawn._

_Cid glances at me with his gruff eyes, "I say girl...it'll be a fecking girl."_

_Or a gay son...which ever._

_He could be like Cecil, only Cid-ified._

_Haha...gay Cid. That would be hilarious._

_Why does he want a girl, anyways? I'm trying to imagine Cid as a girl._

_Creepy._

"_You worried?" Cid asks, painting slowly around a window._

_I glance at him out of the corner of my eye, "About what?"_

_Cid chuckles, "What do ya think?"_

_What? He's too cryptic..._

_It's Cid...that's weird._

_I glance at him, and he meets my eye and laughs again. And it's not so much that he's laughing that bothers me...I just know he's laughing at me._

_Bastard._

"_About marriage idiot," he says, twisting the toothpick in his mouth._

_I swallow...well, I hadn't really thought about that lately...been a little busy with the whole Reno and Yuffie weird thing._

_Crap...now I am worried._

_I mean, marriage usually comes with the association of children, and while we have Denzel and Marlene we haven't had...well, __**babies**_

_...weird._

_Babies..._

_WEIRD._

"_Yo Spike, you listenin' idiot?"_

_I snap back into reality. I hadn't even been painting I was so lost in my mind._

_I glance at him, and he chuckles again._

_Bastard._

"_Don't be worried," he focuses on the wall before him, "I figured I'd have already scared ya shitless at the bar the other day."_

_Well, he was kind of morbid on the topic of marriage._

"_I was just drunk and in need of a good smoke. Smoking...damn these fecking toothpicks."_

_Focus Cid._

_I swallow, moving to paint again, "What about...marriage?"_

_He shrugs, sniffing, "S'not so bad...not as bad as I thought it'd be."_

_I swallow, here's a question though._

"_How's it different...than before?"_

"_Whatcha mean?"_

"_You and Shera have been living together for years..."_

_Cid chuckles, "Yeah. I guess that's got your feathers ruffled, eh chocobo?"_

_Unnecessary hit there buddy._

"_It's different. I mean, yeah, I guess it was the same with me and Shera as it is with you and Tifa...so, it's the same, but there's a definite change."_

_Marriage... Tifa and I already live together...we've started sharing a room together. We have to children in our care. We do everything together...pay bills, shop, eat, sleep, talk...some other...stuff too._

_So how is it different? I mean, she'll still be Tifa..._

_Course..._

"_There is nothing like having a woman respect you enough, and love you enough to put up with your shit and take your last name. There isn't a feeling quite like it, kid."_

_Don't call me kid._

_But I guess he's right... I guess I'll have to wait and see._

_I don't want to wait though._

_I'm nervous...always scared I might not be the best thing for Tifa. That I might not be a good husband or father to our kids, to Denzel and Marlene. I'm usually one for second guessing myself, but I think this would be bigger than anything I've ever done before._

_And maybe that's why Cid is actually talking to me about this in a sort of semi serious way._

_I mean, it is Cid. He isn't exactly a psychiatrist or anything even close to that. I appreciate the effort there._

"_Hey bitch listen to me."_

_Thwack! _

_I sigh, my grip loosening on the paint roller._

_The world hates me...or at least, Cid does._

_He just smacked the back of my head with a paintbrush...with pink paint on it._

_Great...so this is what Benny sort of felt like._

_I hate you Cid._

_Maybe this is some sort of retribution for Benny..._

_Thwack!_

"_I said listen to me dammit."_

_I glance at him, and he gives a crooked grin._

"_You'll be alright...you love her, she loves you...it won't be easy with you two idiots...but, it'll be alright."_

_I blink, staring at him, "Will it be worth it?"_

"_Definitely."_

_I glance out the window; it's getting dark._

"_I need to go, then. Sorry," I gesture to the half finished room._

"_Meh," he shrugs, before throwing his paint brush at me._

_It smacks me on the chest and sticks there for a moment before falling on the ground. I glare at him._

_He grins triumphantly, "Go ahead and paint me pink...I'm in my own house, buddy. __**You**__ on the other hand have got to drive how many miles looking like you just got upchucked from Marlene's closet?"_

_He folds his arms, chuckling._

_I hate losing, and even if he is right I'm still going to chuck that paint bucket at his head._

_Whatever, "Thanks..." I guess._

_"Sure thing. Marriage is worth it...heck, I've got a daughter on the way. Also the perks are great too. Any time, any day... If I'm in the mood, she's much more...well, willing."_

_Wait...what did you just say?_

_"I bet you and Tifa don't even have that freedom. I mean, with the kids and all. Hell, you'll never get your peace like me and Shera."_

_Stop! For the sake of my mental stability please STOP._

_"Or are you two just going at it all the time regardless?"_

_I HATE HIM. _

Though his words have gotten a rather recent memory to come up...carrying Tifa up the steps-

_I feel the blood rush to my face and I focus way too much on the paint brush before me._

_"Oh! I see, you're like rabbits, aren't you? Young and vigorous. Heh, I remember those days...good days."_

_What is **wrong** with him?_

_"I mean, you and Tifa **are **like that, correct?"_

_Too personal. Must avert eyes. Must leave...leave, door...go for door, now. Just don't...look...back._

Shit.

_He chuckles, "That's what I thought. Go get 'em tiger!"_

**A/N: **OMG IM SORREH. So LONG! I know! My updating as all but died this past month. Bows in forgiveness. I've just been so freaking busy. Classes, work, other crap that I have to deal with. UGH! I'm so tired! But, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. **VinVal** You were right, Cid came off as very negative towards marriage. I came to this correction. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and Benny's revenge...sort of. Kudos to those who see ALL the past references.

**Thanks **for the reviews soooooo much! I love reading them all. They're awesome. I'm glad everyone loved Cloud's lustiness. LUST RAWR GO GET EM TIGER


	64. Is That My Ring?

**A/N: **There is something special at the bottom. AND DONT YOU DARE SCROLL AHEAD TO LOOK! Heh

_Is That My Ring?_

_I practically drive at the speed of sound to get home by my usual hour..._

_And yes also because I'm covered and pink and the way I see it if they just see a pink blur they won't be able to tell __**who **__the pink blur is... not that I'm exactly sure who 'they' are, I just know they're watching..._

_Paranoia!_

_Anyways..._

_I pull up the bar, and it's busy, as to be expected since it's around seven. The bar is in its peak hours...so maybe the best idea wasn't to go rushing home to a place probably full of burly men getting off of manly work..._

_Since I'm pink and everything..._

_I pull into the garage; at least I'll get a little reprieve, though I'm pretty sure I heard some snickering from the alley. Still, let's try to minimize damage as it is._

_I kick down the stand on Fenrir, and stand slowly, stretching my arms. The dried paint cracks as I move, and I swallow, staring down._

_Alright...let's formulate a strategy here..._

_I open up the garage door; down the hall I can see the bright lights of the bar, the opening to behind the bar, and the steps on the left. All I need to do is make it to the steps...covered in pink._

_I'm trying to figure out which will cause a bigger show...me in pink, or me shirtless. Still, there's pink on my pants...splatters, but hopefully they'll be more distracted by the fact that I'm shirtless instead of pink._

_Not that I want to be shirtless in front of these people, by weighing my options is kinda taking a toll on my brain right now._

_Shirtless wouldn't be so bad... I'm sure Tifa wouldn't mind–_

_Oh __**shit**_

_It's Reno._

_Now anything I do will be announced to the whole of Edge, and probably the world. Crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap–_

_Maybe I should wait until he leaves..._

_I check my watch; if I don't enter soon Tifa will call me, and then what? I answer her while I'm in the garage and tell her I'm where?_

_Crap._

_This is way too hard._

_How bout this? Yeah, that'll work._

_Five minutes later I make my way down the hallway fully clothed, and fully armed. Yes...what bastard dare make fun of the man covered in pink paint with six swords strapped to his back?_

_NONE._

"_Cloud?"_

_Shit, except Tifa. Well...except she isn't a bastard but you get the idea._

_I glance over my shoulder. "Hmm?"_

"_What...happened?"_

_Reno is staring at me bug eyed, biting his tongue; I can tell. There's no way he dares to laugh at me because of this. I broke his nose when he gave me a birthday card...who knows what in the hell I'll do if he makes fun of my pink state of being._

"_I helped Cid paint...he threw a bucket at me."_

_Tifa gives a little laugh. "Well, go get changed."_

_She leans in close to kiss my cheek, and grins into my ear. "So any particular reason you're carrying all your swords on your back?"_

_Damn...she knows me too well._

_I flush slightly. "They need cleaning...sharpened..."_

"_Right." She grins wide, but releases my arm to go tend to the impatient bar crowd._

_I head upstairs. I barely make it up before I hear Reno roar with laughter._

_I hate him._

_I take a quick shower, throwing my clothes in a heap in the corner of my room..._

_I should probably pick those up. Tifa might not like my pink clothing on her floor...our floor._

_Still._

_Ah who cares. I think after the suffering I've dealt with today she can stand to have some pink clothing on her floor._

_I sigh, slipping into some comfortable clothing before heading downstairs. Marlene and Denzel are in the back coloring pictures on the table._

_Denzel grins when he sees me. "Hey Cloud!"_

_I grunt in response, heading to the fridge; I just want a cold beer... And thank freaking everything holy that I'm in a bar because that's pretty easy to come by when you're in one._

_Woot beer! _

_I pop the cap on the bottle with my thumb and glance at the kids. They're staring at me. I take a deep drag, and glance over my shoulder. "How long has Reno been here?"_

"_An hour or so." Marlene shrugs, going back to coloring._

"_Hn."_

"_Why are you late, Cloud?" Denzel asks._

_Yeah, it's probably a good thing that Denzel or Marlene didn't see me in pink paint. Marlene probably would try to con me into her tea parties if she saw me so...girlish._

_Not that I would actually __**let **__that happen, but that's beside the point._

_I hear Reno's voice echo down the hall; it might be kind of dangerous approaching him so soon after seeing me in pink, but who the hell cares. I feel like seeing Tifa, and besides...he's a damned- I mean, claimed man._

_Haha...he's Yuffie's bitch._

_I pat Marlene's head and ruffle Denzel's hair before heading out towards the bar. It's packed, filled with the usual crowd and some other strangers. There are jackets strewn across tables and chairs; I keep forgetting it's October already. I wonder when we'll set a date? Or better yet, when that date will actually be. And where..._

_Another rowdy crowd makes its way into the bar, joining a party already seated around three tables. It shakes me from my reverie and I head behind the bar to where Tifa is mixing drinks with a practiced deftness. She sighs blowing her bangs up out of her eyes as she hands out another drink._

"_Need help?" I ask softly._

_She almost jumps out of her skin, and sends me a withering glance. "No...I'm just a bit behind."_

_A bit? Pssh._

"_I can–_

"_You can't mix drinks," Tifa cuts me off. "Remember last time?"_

_Yeah, let's not go to last time._

"_I mean, really, I don't know how you took out three people, and I really don't want to replace another window just because you can't hold onto the bottles."_

_I can do nifty bar tricks..._

_So what if I lose my grip sometimes?_

"_But–_

"_Cloud." She sighs, turning to face me. "It's fine, really."_

_This is why you need to hire help woman._

_She glowers irritably at me, "I do not need hired help."_

_I don't know why she's so determined to do everything on her own._

"_Because I __**can**__ handle everything on my own."_

_Quit reading my mind!_

"_I can't help it your responses are so predictable."_

_Dammit I hate it when she does this._

_And I am not predictable._

"_Your crowd is getting impatient."_

_She glances over her shoulder, and sighs. "Shoot...you're right." She sighs again before thrusting a tray of drinks into my hands. "Take these to that big party in the left corner, and ignore Reno. The last thing I need is for __**you**__ to start a bar fight."_

_I nod my head, taking the tray and turn around._

_I can tell it's been a long day on her. She is a bit frazzled, and short tempered. She really should hire someone, but really there's not that many people in Edge that want this job are...well... let's just say Tifa's first applicant replier was a male stripper._

_Yeah...that wasn't exactly what she was looking for...at all._

_I suppress a sigh, dodging the rowdy bodies as they celebrate the week's end. Can't say I really blame them._

_I glance up from my intense concentration on the tray as I arrive at the tables._

_Well great._

_It's about fifteen women, mostly drunk if not all the way. I think it's a bachelorette party. _

_They laugh over something, and then go silent as they see me standing before them._

"_Uh..." Drinks anyone?_

"_Ooh," one of the women mumbles, and they all stare._

_I hate it...it's like I'm in a fish bowl or something._

_Great, now they're ogling. _

_I'll just leave these here. _

_I sit the tray of drinks on one of the tables. I feel like I'm surrounded by a pack of wild animals... Since when did Tifa agree to host bachelorette parties?_

_I turn to leave as they begin to snicker._

"_Oh shoot! Sir?"_

_Shit._

_I turn back to them, and one of the women pouts. "I dropped my earring...see? It's right there by your foot." She points at the ground._

_I glance down; it's about a foot in front of me._

_Uh._

"_Could you get that for me? Since you're already there and everything." She gives a mischievous grin._

_...something's not right. But what's the harm in picking up an earring?_

_I turn away from them and bend forward to pick up the earring._

"_Ahhh..." A collective sigh emits from the tables, and I glance sharply over my shoulder._

_Shit I just got played._

'_Good thing you aren't wearing a kilt, boy toy.'_

_Screw you Zack._

'_No __**you're**__ about to get screwed...just don't make eye contact. They can smell fear.'_

_I pick up the earring and turn quickly, standing, eyeing the women. The animals._

_I feel so...violated. I think they're undressing me with their eyes... of course Tifa freaking sends me to the drunk bachelorette party. _

_I wonder which one is getting married..._

'_The one with the veil... the one that dropped the earring.'_

_Crap._

_I hope this isn't what Tifa will do when she has her bachelorette party. Well, knowing Yuffie she'll probably hire the male stripper Tifa almost hired that one time._

_Great._

'_Dude...what if they think __**you're **__their stripper?'_

_Shut up Zack!_

_I've been standing here for too long as it is._

_But I've still got to give her the earring back. I'll just put it on the table, that's what I'll do–_

_Crap, now she's holding out her hand. _

_That would be rude..._

_But who the hell cares about being rude? After everything they've done I should just throw this stupid earring at them. _

_And people wonder why I'm antisocial and don't go to bars._

_I enjoy my privacy._

_I move to drop the earring on the table, but the woman pushes her hand out farther to take the earring. This could be a trap._

'_Evasive maneuvers! Abort mission! ABORT!_'

_So close..._

'_She's going for your wrist! RUN MAN RUN!'_

_No!_

"_Oh, is that my ring?" Tifa's voice comes from behind me._

_I almost drop the earring, and the woman hesitates. I take the time to drop the earring into her palm without touching her._

"_Uh..."_

"_No." The earring woman's voice is scything. "It's __**my **__earring."_

_Tifa gives a little laugh...which would sound innocent and completely harmless to untrained ears, but luckily I know better._

"_Oh." Tifa smiles in a good nature. "See, I thought it was one of my rings... but silly me, I forgot I put my ring on this necklace that you gave me Cloud." She pulls out the chain with the wolf ring on it. "To, you know, make room for my engagement ring." Tifa wiggles her fingers to show off her ring. "And I certainly didn't want to lose my wolf ring...since it matches his earring and everything. Sort of symbolic, you know."_

_Ha! You just got owned lady._

"_Anyways, sorry for the interuption ladies. Enjoy your night." She turns to me, and smiles. "Thanks for handling these drinks, baby."_

_Baby? Ha, she's really laying it on thick._

_She leans forward and gives me a long kiss on the lips, before breaking it and winking at me. She then flounces back over to the bar leaving a stunned and silenced group behind her._

_I swallow once, glancing at the women before following after Tifa._

'_Well, that went a lot better than it could of.'_

_Shut up Zack._

'_Good thing you got Tifa to watch out for your defenseless ass and all.'_

_Shut __**up**__ Zack._

'_I mean, without her, you could've had all your innocence taken away in one fell swoop.'_

_I hate you. _

'_I forgive you...after such traumatic moments people alwa_ys _say things they don't mean.'_

_Oh trust me, I freaking mean it._

**THANKS TO EVERYONE SO FAR!**

( ) - that was an anonymous reviewer…their name was space, -.XxX.Alone-4eva-Solita.XxX.-, .Angel.x.In.x.Disguise, .winteroverture, 0-0-K-I-T-T-Y-0-0, 0xShelkyx0, 1frickingirl, 234Lily234, Admiral Andalite, Aiden Strifehart, AirGrl, AkimaDoll, Albedo's Will To Power, Alexia Alexendra, Alice001, Altais, Alyde, Amaranthos, Ameria-chan, AmoebazFantasy, AmyRoseAi, Ana Luminita, Anansay, Ange De Crystale, AngelofWrath, Anonymous, Anonymous x Writer, Arie Under Presure, Arisa K, Artemis Maxima, Ash Ai, AzNAnGeL07, AzurePlague, Basia Lynn, Bells of Requiem, Bianka-chanBinkledup, Bio, Biskitty, Bloo.Chocolate, Blue Paper Crane, Bluishorbs, Bytemite, C2-Chikaru, Calistar Heir, CanoeingCutieCardcaptor Hikari, CerberusL, Ceressky, Chaotic Arcadia, Chaotic Symphony, Cheapy Corp., ChiCkkie, ChibiTeef, ChieriAn9el, City of Dis, Ckeffer, CloudForTifa, Cloudti123, CrazyKidDeath, Creative Spark, CreepyCuteness, CrimsinRed, Crying-Nocturne-IX, DarkxKunoichi, Darkness Eternal, Dark Angel, Daylight, DC, DemonLoulou, Devils'kin, Dragon D., DrugFreeBoy, Duderman, Eleidin, Elentaria, Eloa, ellumina, ErekLich, Excelr8.Speed48, FFVII-AC, Faelia, FairyIce, Fall of Normality, Fenrir X), Fenrir21, Fiery Diamond, FinalxHeaven, Fire Behind Your Eyes, FlowerGirls, Free The Dancing Lamas, Frek, G.M.Potter, Gabriela Black, Galaxia Alpha, GaleBread, Garnetstartif, GameConsoleMaster, General Dragon, Ghostly, Gition, Hakubaiko, Heartless, Hitokiri no Makka, InjuredPelican, Iskra Revoir Jaci, Jade003, Janettelle, Jezzi, JingYee, Just Mystical, Just.Short. Jyaistha, KairiGirl, KaryuuNoHaneKata, Katherinne McKay, Katrita, Kay-Mika, Kazaam, Kenjustsu Princess, KenYasha, Kimmae, Kingdom-Keys16, Kiome-Yasha, KiraGS, Kinghtlight-01, Kohryu, KonataRawrs, Kuldian, KuroKumo14, Lacus Lockheart, Lady Demure, Ladypadfoot1, Laura, Lavvy, Le Pecore Nere, Lethal Duckie, Legendary Phantom Thief Taco, Lenore Hepburn, Leo's Katana-Babe, Lily of the Prairie, Lisilgirl, Lizzie8, LockhartVII, London Winchest, Lord and Master of FF7, Lord of the Rings Master, Lord-Rchard-Rahl, Lord Sparta, LuvinAniManga, M, Magus Sister Mandy, MaharajaClinton, MakoRain, MamaRosa, Matamis-bata, Maymer, Mayura-Hikari-090, Meline, Meliona, Mena Madvin, Miko102, Mikoaya, Minnami, Miss Murderess, Missyesque, Mister Bigbucks, Miyame Amui chan, Mocassin, MorbidXAngel, Morgan, Mrs. Sarah Weasley, Mystic Dragon Eyes, Naomi Nakano, Natalie, Natural Disaster, Navi366, Nefertieh, Neo-Queen Serenity, Nephythys Snape, Nicole, Nitastic, Niquie, Nisha, NorseFTX, Nova Dragon, NRGburst, Only-the-Best-Fanfics, Orphen4, Oxygen Pirate, Paintball Willie, Pepsi216, Phoenix flame01, PiningOverPadfoot, Poetic.Abortion, PoutingCutie, Primela-chan, Princess of the Queens, Prozacfairy, RaeRikkuStrong, Raika-chan, Raito Akuma, Reivly, Rend, Rhyssa Fireheart, Riku-Phoenix, Rin, Rue It Hard, Ryuusui, S.K., Sabakku-chan, Sabith, SAEL, Sam's Wolf, Saphyre Inferno, SAVEXXTHEXXRAVE, SEPHIROTH2021, Serina Tsuki, ShadowofDarkness92, Sheiky, Shinigami Kira, Shugoshin No Sora, Sienna03, SierralaineWalsh, SilentWhisperWolf, Silhouette, Silver Angels of the Moon, Silver Fenrir, Silver Metallic Dragon, Siriusly Sick Synapses, SonicPhatom01, SparrowStrife, Suicune1000, Summer Jasmine, Sutzina Zion, TamariaTangoo43,Thall, Teef Lockheart, Teefie, Teyke, The Sparx Alchemist , TheNoLifeQueen, TheSkyIsCalling, TheWhiteDevilDexus, Tibbar Sabertooth, Tincent, TiooneDawnstar, Tolle7, TomboyishFF, ToonsTri17 TrishBratt006, Trooper987, True Heaven, TsukiKousei, Tsukisamu Sayako, Tsuyu ryu, Twixy, Unorthodox Enigma, Untold Secrets, Ur1Nonly, Verona Sage, Valentine'sNinja, Victim of Mako, VinVal, Vidication San-chan, Vulcan Halps, WomanOfHeart, WorldsoFragile, Wyaline, Xathorial, YS, Z7777777, Zaz9-zaa0, Zaire, Zhangman's Shadow, Zili, ZoneShifter D, Zonic The Zone Cop, anarchic9, anime girlie10, anonymous... 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	65. The Incident Part II

_The Incident Part II_

_That was nice._

_My eyes open slowly, hearing birds singing outside of my window; that's a nice change. Usually I hear the dump truck. I guess they're running late this morning... I glance at the clock; or I am, at least. Wow, been a while since I've slept in this late. Course, it was a tiring night...after that whole thing with the stupid bachelorette party. And...other activities. Ahem...yes, moving on._

_It's warm in the bed. That's one thing I've always loved about Tifa's bed. She's got a kick ass bed. I'm like, swallowed in her blanket. I don't see how she can get out of it every morning._

_However I am alone._

_And this perturbs me._

_Greatly._

_Usually I wake up before Tifa or with her so I can at least get a little moment. By moment I mean just laying there while she sleeps in my arms._

_Yes I can be a sap. So sue me._

_I take a deep breath, relaxing back down into my pillow to listen to the house. I can hear someone in the shower. It must be Tifa. I also hear movements downstairs. I'm surprised the kids haven't woken me up yet. Tifa must have let me sleep in, or kept them from waking me up. Or something more interesting got in the way. _

_Well...if it's like __**that**__ then..._

_Heh... I guess I'll go say good morning._

_I sit up quickly, because if I give myself time to think about actually getting out of bed I won't get up. I scratch the back of my head, finding my pajama pants and putting them on. I stand slowly and slip on Tifa's slippers (fuzzy, bright purple ducks. I can work these...I'm damn sexy) and shuffle across the floor slowly out of our room and towards the bathroom. Out in the hall I can hear Denzel and Marlene laughing about something; they sound excited but more importantly I know it's her in the shower._

_I open the bathroom door slowly, peeking my head inside. The shower is going steadily, but before I make my presence known, I'm going to brush my teeth. Nothing like a nice good morning kiss tasting like I barfed in my mouth._

_Nice._

_After brushing my teeth, I tiptoe up to the curtain smirking slightly. I'm going to scare the crap out of her. She'll try to kill me, but I won't give her the chance. I'll woo her with my sexiness. I tell you, I'm rocking these slippers._

_Okay, not really, but that's beside the point._

_I really need some slippers. Or some bed socks. _

_That sounds stupid though..._

_What the hell am I thinking about bed socks and slippers for? I have more important things here at hand._

_I reach up slowly, placing my hands on the curtain and in one swift and unthinking movement I yank the curtain back._

_OH! Ouch! My eyes! No! I'm blind! _

_Why?! Why me?! Why freaking me?! What did I do to __**deserve **__this shit?!_

_You never freaking learn, Strife. If it didn't work the first time, it probably won't work the second time. _

_That is most certainly not Tifa._

"_Huh?"_

_I'm like a deer caught in headlights. Hell, it's like a car wreck. You want to look away but you can't. It's just that __**bad**_

_There's a moment of silence and stuttering, jaw dropping incomprehension._

_And then...then it clicks._

_Oh shit._

_OH __**shit**_

"_WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"_

_I am reduced to sheer, animal instinct in order to escape with my life, and all my body parts intact._

_Run run run run run-run for your freaking life-run run run run run–_

"_You bastard! I'm going to kill you!"_

_I tear out of the bathroom at top speed, well, as much speed as one can get in about four feet. I bounce off the wall to keep my speed up, wincing when the wood cracks beneath my shoulder. I can hear the shower being turned off, but more importantly (because this has to do with me keeping my life) loud, thunderous footsteps getting closer._

_Run run run run-what is wrong with you?! Run faster you idiot-run run run–_

"_**Spike**__!"_

_SHIT run run run run run run run–_

_I thunder down the steps, taking them two at a time. I'm surprised the slippers have survived so far. These things are weak; I should've burned through the soles at the speed I'm going._

_I'm just glad I didn't think about reaching out and grabbing 'her' when I opened the curtain. That will save me some grief._

"_I'm going to tear you apart!"_

_Or at least some limbs._

_I hit the bottom floor running, but my slippers fight for a grip on the slick floor. In that moment of stationary running...well, more like frantic scrambling, I see Denzel and Marlene staring at me with open shock and what do you freaking know? Why it's Tifa, and she's standing before the stove with a confused look on her face and __**not **__in the shower. That would've been useful information about five minutes ago. _

"_Nice slippers Cloud." I hear Denzel say before I take off towards the door._

_Yeah, I'll get you back for that comment later. I'm just a tad bit busy right now keeping myself alive. You know, priorities and everything._

"_Stop him! Stop his stupid ass!"_

_Shit shit shit shit._

_And of course the dutiful daughter does stop me. Thanks a lot Marlene._

_And she's awfully conniving about it._ _Marlene extends her leg and kicks a chair out in front of me only just so slightly. I go down __**hard**__ and roll onto my back._

"_Daddy's here." Marlene says sweetly staring down at me. "I think he wants to talk to you."_

_Thanks for that memo, Marlene. _

"_Cloud? What on earth is going on?" Tifa asks, heading towards me._

_She stops short though as a giant, white and black blur appears in the doorway._

"_Oh hell no!" Barret has arrived on the scene wrapped in a large, fluffy white robe. "Don't you __**dare **__protect his scrawny little ass! He's going to __**die**__." Barret pauses, spotting Marlene. "__**And **__he made me curse in front of my little girl. His death will be a painful one," he spits, his eyes practically on fire._

_Trust me buddy, I did not appreciate the view. It certainly was not what I was expecting._

"_What happened?" Tifa asked, planting her hands on her hips. _

_That's right...please stick up for me. Protect me long enough so that I can escape unnoticed._

"_He–_

_Barret cuts off, turning red, and lowers his voice. _

_He hisses, "He opened the curtain..."_

"_What?" Tifa asks, confused._

"_He __**opened**__ the __**curtain**__. I think you've experienced this at least once...and probably more judging by his behavior."_

_Hey in my defense I thought it was Tifa. Honest mistake. It's hard to tell the difference between a thin, brunette woman and a large, burly man when there's a curtain in the way, okay?_

_No I wasn't paying attention to the silhouette so shut your mouth._

"_Wha–...oh. __**Oh**__. Cloud!" Tifa spits, turning her glare towards me._

_I didn't do it on purpose, I swear! Who __**would**__ do that on purpose?!_

"_What?" I ask._

_Great job, mouth. You just dug our hole deeper. _

"_What? What do you mean what?" _

_What is what I mean, woman._

"_Cloud!"_

_Fuck...mouth to mind filter did not work on that one._

_Barret crosses his arms smugly_. _"Yeah, now ya going to get it."_

"_Shut up Barret. You stay out of this."_

"_Yes ma'am."_

_Ha! Told! You got told._

_Well, crap, now it's my turn._

"_Cloud, you just don't go around opening shower curtains on people, and don't you dare call me 'woman' in that tone."_

_Great, I'm getting treated like a four year old by my fiancé. That's got to be promising._

"_Wait...why was Cloud opening shower curtains in the first place?" Marlene asks, looking genuinely confused._

_Awkward..._

"_Er..."_

"_Um, he was going to clean it, Marlene. He didn't realize your papa was in it."_

_Nice lie, Tifa. That's totally believable._

"_Yeah, sweetie, it was just an accident." Barret tries to reassure her._

_Marlene gets a stern look on her face. "Then you shouldn't be giving him such a hard time, papa," she scolds. "It was just an accident after all."_

_Hell yes Marlene. Thank you. It was an accident. I meant to open the curtain but not on that. Ugh. How have I not hurled yet?_

"_Accident...wrong curtain if you ask me," Barret mutters. _

_I glare at him._

_It was the wrong curtain...well, right curtain wrong person._

_**Wrong**__ person._

_Ew._

_Shudder._

_Shit, now I'm thinking about the time I pictured Barret in a dress which is not helping these mental images at __**all**__. Yeah, can't burn that one off the skull. It's imprinted there for life._

_It's not fair! It doesn't matter if he's seen me naked, I'm better looking, and younger._

_It's Barret for crying out loud._

_Who do you honestly think suffered more here? I was expecting to see Tifa. Ti-fa. Not Barret. Shit._

"_Why don't you two go watch some TV, okay?" Tifa prompts. "I'll call you when breakfast is ready."_

_That sends the kids running to the other room quickly without question._

_But it also returns all attention to me. I'm getting tired of the spotlight, people._

_Barret points a menacing finger at me. "I'll get you back for this."_

_I'd find that more intimidating if he wasn't in a robe._ _Course if I tried to intimidate anyone in these slippers it probably wouldn't work very well either._

_I probably would've gotten away with it if wasn't for these damn slippers. No traction what so ever._

_Barret turns around and heads back up the stairs, cussing and muttering the entire way up._

_Tifa glances at me and sighs. _

"_You're crazy," she says, turning back to the stove._

_There's probably some truth there. I won't deny it._

"_It was an accident."_

"_I believe that." _

_Burn._

_I sigh. She won't even help me up. It was an accident! It's not like I opened the shower up on another woman–_

_Oh...woman._

_I should just stay on this floor and rot cause I'm obviously not succeeding at anything else. _

_I scratch the back of my head nervously. I've insulted her, and no one will hold a grudge like a woman. I just called her what she was! She __**is **__a woman, and that wasn't even supposed to go to my mouth. That was supposed to be stopped at 'Things you don't even think about fucking saying'. This is dangerous if my mouth-to-mind filter is broken, though. _

_Crap. One more problem to fix._

"_...sorry..."_

_Tifa t urns slightly. "Did you say something?"_

_Oh you heard me woman, you know perfectly well I said something._

_Oh thank God that one filtered._

"_I said sorry," I sigh._

"_For what? You should be apologizing to Barret, not me."_

_Oh drag it out, get your fill._

"_Sorry..."_

_Tifa sighs, glancing at me again. "Fine."_

_Fine what? Fine I'm forgiven? Fine I'm sorry but sorry you aren't forgiven?_

"_Fine?"_

_She shrugs. "Fine."_

_Don't be difficult! I've had a trying enough morning as it is!_

_Question._

"_Why was Barret in the shower?"_

_Tifa gives a little laugh. "You missed it. I was making pancakes, this is my second batch. Marlene accidentally gave her father a pancake batter bath."_

"_...how?"_

"_She was aiming for Denzel."_

"_Oh." Shouldn't we be trying to teach our children not to throw pancake batter at each other?_

_She sighs. "I know I should've woken you up this morning, but I knew you were tired and you looked so content sleeping."_

_She glances at me and smiles, and looks away._

_Forgiven._

_She shakes her head. "I swear Cloud, I don't know what to do with you sometimes."_

_Accept the fact that I'm an idiot? And a tad bit crazy?_

"_Are you ever going to get up off the floor?"_

"_Oh...yeah." _

_I stand slowly heading towards her. "You know...it was an accident."_

_Tifa rolls her eyes. "Duh. Of course I do. Think things through...I know that's hard for you."_

_Ouch. Maybe I'm not quite as forgive as I thought._

_"Just be more careful next time, okay?"_

"_I don't think there will be a next time."_

"_Why?"_

"_I think he'll remember to lock the door."_

**A/N: **BOWS down to the awesomeness of her reviewers. BOWS! I got 49 reviews for the last chapter. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. I can't believe we're almost to 1300. That's insanity! But I love insanity, so it's all good. At first it actually was going to be Tifa in the shower, but where's the fun in that? And obviously the "Incident Part II" should make more sense. Once again, I apologize for such a LATE update. I'm sorry, it's just been so freaking hectic! Those of you that know school and work will understand this. I'm always looking at these stories like, why don't they update?! But I understand, it's a crazy world. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and as always, I love you guys, and your reviews! Till next time, loves!

Also thanks to those who read Rita Boltspirit XD


	66. Milkshake Mamas

**A/N: **Thanks to Captain Wee for chapter title...rock bottom my ass XD

_Milkshake Mamas_

_Tifa rolls over in her sleep and slaps me, groaning. I jerk awake, blinking wide as I try and piece things together._

_When I envisioned us sharing a room, I didn't think to calculate the cons into it. It was all pros for me; Tifa all the time, any time. I mean, I guess I should've thought about smack sleeping._

_Beat down!_

_And it's not like getting slapped by Tifa in one's sleep is like getting slapped by a feather. It's like a friggin brick wall just dropped out of the sky and landed on your chest. This woman can embroider pillow cases, yet she chooses to smack me around like a punching bag. Crazy._

_She sighs, and then snuggles up into my armpit. Yeah, that's right...payback. Smell my stinky pits...well, they aren't too stinky. I did take a shower. I'm not a complete heathen, you know._

_Damn...foiled again._

_I can't say I really blame her, she's been sick these past couple of days and hasn't gotten much sleep until tonight, so I'll put up with the abuse. Plus I love her, and I'm pretty much putty in her hands. Damn... I'm a softy._

_Like a milkshake. Cold yet soft...such an enigma._

_I'm complicated like that... hard to understand, I mean... not hard to get along with. I think I'm a pretty likeable guy. Hell, I just compared myself to a milkshake, and everybody loves milkshakes._

_Well, I guess people who are lactose intolerant don't like milkshakes... or can't eat cheese...and milk...and other dairy products. I suppose they could like milkshakes, but couldn't have them. _

_You know I used to think that it was 'lack toast and tolerant'. I mean, what the hell does that mean? I can't eat cheese...therefore I lack toast... and I am tolerant of this fact. I have come to terms with my toast lacking, even though toast is not a dairy product and has nothing to do with cheese. I guess if you butter your toast, you can't eat it because it, like cheese, is a dairy product, therefore containing lactose, and if you're lactose intolerant than you're screwed._

_I'd be pretty damn depressed if I couldn't eat cheese._

_More so if I couldn't eat ice cream._

"_Cloud?"_

"_Hn?" She wakes. The beast stirs...brick wall fists and all._

_Smell my pits._

"_What are you mumbling about?"_

_Mumbling? I, mumbling? I wasn't mumbling. I was holding a intelligent conversation in my head._

"_If you keep talking about toast and cheese you're going to make me hungry."_

_Oh, midnight snacks are the greatest. I should get some ice cream, and eat that thing to the floor... since I'm not lactose intolerant and all._

"_Are you listening?"_

"_Hn?"_

"_Thought so."_

_She shifts, snuggling her nose up beside my neck this time and sighs._

_Ice cream, that would be a bitchin' late night snack. Great, now I can't stop thinking about ice cream... orange sherbert... milkshake. I've never had an orange sherbert milkshake. God I want a milkshake now. It would hit the spot._

_I could slip on her slippers, and slip my way down stairs and into the fridge. I could make a milkshake, we've got a blender... a new one, and not a stink bomb infested one, either._

_I'm not going to be able to fall asleep now. I've got a one track mind, and it's tracking milkshakes._

_...with cherries._

"_Cloud!"_

"_What?"_

_Tifa sits up, propping herself up on my chest and glares down at me._

"_Are you going to talk all night?"_

_I stare at her, wide eyed. "I didn't even realize I was."_

"_You keep muttering ice cream, and milkshakes. Are you trying to make me go get you one?"_

"_...no." But if you want to, I won't stop you._

_She sighs, and gives a little smile. "You're hopeless."_

_I just need something to distract me from milkshakes._

_She leans forward and plants a big kiss on my lips._

_Oh. Distracted._

_Screw milkshakes. With this sort of distraction I could be lactose intolerant._

_xxx_

_This is a war of will. A great will, a fight of strengths within one person. I am strong, and will resist. I will triumph, I will win._

_Cos I'm bitchin' awesome._

_I relax my muscles, laying back on my bed. The corner of my mouth twitches, and then my eyebrow. I ball up my hand, making a fist, and flex my arm three times._

_Fight it, Cloud, fight it._

_This is war. This is not going to beat me._

_Oh screw this._

_I sit up quickly, scratching my forearm with my finger tips. It would work better if I had nails, but I really don't have long nails. Stubby, little nails that don't go past my fingertips. They can't hit the skin that way._

_Ah! Sweet relief. Scratching that oh so annoying itch._

_I sigh, and lie back down on the bed._

_...crap._

_My arm itches again, and worse._

_I scratch my nose, and then my chin._

_I have an itch compulsion. As soon as I itch in one place, I itch in twelve other places._

_I must start the war over again. The first battle goes to the itch, but the war is not over, not by a long shot._

_I should probably get out of bed soon...do things. Like work. That might would distract me from the itching._

_Tifa got up like...an hour or so ago...and I'm a lazy bum, staying in bed. Oh well, my arm itches...I have a good excuse. Good reason..._

_Man my arm itches._

_My phone rings, though, distracting me. I reach over, fumbling for it before flipping it open._

"_Hello?"_

"_OH MAH GAWD Kuh-loud! How could you not __**tell **__me?"_

_I hate it when she does this. "Tell you what, Yuffie?"_

_She scoffs. "Only the greatest, most awesome news ever, you dipshit."_

_Ouch._

"_Uh."_

"_I mean, I thought we had gotten pretty close after the past few months, especially how you've helped me with all the Reno drama."_

"_How is that?"_

"_Reno? Oh, I totally played him the other day. I asked Rude out on a date. You should've seen how quickly his tune changed. He sent me a dozen lilies."_

"_Aren't lilies the flower of death?"_

"_How the hell do you know that? Shut up, I don't care."_

_Isn't it wrong to toy with a man's feelings?_

_Wait, it's Yuffie...she has no sense of morals. Duh. And it's Reno...why should I care? _

"_But still, Cloud! I'm hurt! The greatest news of your life, and you keep it secret from me. My heart...it weeps."_

_This is getting old real fast. "What are you talking about?"_

"_I can't believe you're still playing this game."_

_Game? What the hell...I didn't ask for this._

"_I mean, to keep something like Tifa's pregnancy a secret–_

_Holy hell... what the hell did she just say?_

"_You can at least tell me if it's a boy or a girl."_

"_..."_

"_Cloud? Are you still there? Kuh-loud! Hell-o-o-o! I'm asking you a question."_

"_How..."_

"_Oh, I was in Edge yesterday, and I saw her in the Maternity Clothing store. She was looking at a cute dress."_

_I try to form words, but my voice cracks._

"_I mean, she could at __**least **__go shopping with me. I mean, I can kinda understand you not saying anything, but Tifa? This is big ass news, ya know?"_

_She's pregnant? Why the hell hasn't she told me? ...maybe this is why she's been sick._

_Holy shit I'm going to be a dad... is that a good thing? I mean, I don't mind being a dad, but... I don't know if I'm cut out for this._

_I can't stop twitching. This is BIG. This news...is huge...I can't contain this...I need to buy baby things...like cribs and blankets and bottles! And not liquor bottles... baby bottles. __**Milk**_

_What if it's a boy?_

_Holy crap what if it's a girl? Sixteen years from now I will have to regulate dating patterns...forbid male company... I'll have to have talks about __**sex **__and __**drugs**__...I can't do that! I can't handle that type of responsibility! Can you imagine how a sex talk will go with my daughter! _

_Bump that, I'm sending her to a nunnery._

_I'm going to have to teach him-her-it how to walk, and talk... I'm going to have to change diapers, and clothes, and give baths...and deal with burping and puking and pooping._

_I can't... I... I'm too...too me to reproduce._

_Well, too late for that._

_I kinda already have._

"_...but I was all like, why hasn't Tifa said anything, unless she's planning a surprise or something? So I was like, I'll call Cloud, he'll know what she's planning. So what is she planning, Cloud? How far along is she? When's the baby shower? Come on, give me some juicy bits."_

_My voice squeaks again._

"_God, Cloud, you're acting like you didn't even know–...oh. Oh. Shit. God...I feel like an ass... I hope it's yours, after all."_

_My voice just went up another octave._

"_Wait! No! I didn't mean...it like that! I mean, you know Tifa...wouldn't be with anyone else. I mean, she couldn't hide that from me, so it's definitely yours. Definitely. Yep."_

_WHY WOULD SHE SAY THAT!_

"_Uh..yeah, so congratulations and everything! Got to go!"_

_Click._

_Bitch._

_...I hope my kid doesn't lack toast._

**A/N: **WOOOOOOOOOOO! I live. PREGNANT! TIFA! WHAT A TWIST!¦lt;/p

Lots of news. So, I know it's been months (God help me) but it's been a rough few months. I need your prayers (and not meaning to religiously offend someone) but my best friend of 12 years and roommate's mother suffered from a brain aneurysm this past week, and is in the hospital in critical condition. She's got a chance of making it, but she also has a chance of not... so if you could say a little prayer for her, I would appreciate it greatly. I know it doesn't seem like much maybe to some of you, but it would mean the world to me. Every bit of support is appreciated.

On a lighter note, I'm going to Cali this summer and I'm going to be at anime expo a few days with my (go figure) Asian friends. This is a big trip (I'm on the east coast) and I'm so excited, and they want me to dress up as someone but I can't make up my mind. Suggestions would be appreciated, preferably long brown hair ones. But all are appreciated!

Thank you all sooooo much for the reviews etc. etc. I read them all, and enjoy them. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and hopefully I'll have another one out sooner. Till next time loves.


	67. A Grown Ass Man

_A Grown Ass Man_

_I have managed a full successful three days of bullshiting._

_Screw you, it's not a word, I don't fucking care right now._

_Do you understand? Could really anyone understand why my fiancé is keeping one of the greatest things ever from me?! Could anyone really?! _

_...pardon me if I'm just a tiny bit stressed out right now, on the wire, on the ledge if you will end of my rope crap._

_Run on sentences suck._

_But see, today I cannot escape. _

_For the past three days I've been in this house for about six hours a day, and five and a half of those are spent sleeping. That's right. I've taken on a buttload of deliveries, keeping myself busy so I don't think about that lying woman that I love._

_Babies._

_Dammit._

_I've been getting in at about one in the morning, sleeping till six thirty, getting up and rushing the fuck out. Of course I've called in and checked up on everyone, and of course I've called at those times when I __**know**__ Tifa won't be around. I'm afraid if I talk to her I'm going to blurt something completely irrelevant out, and just mess everything up...not like I haven't been messing stuff up, but you know–_

_Babies–_

_DAMMIT. See?! That's what I'm talking about! My mind is so sporadic right now I can't trust myself to speak more than two word sentences! Even to Marlene when I'm talking to her on the phone I'm like, okay, yeah...well...I'm usually like that anyways, but this is serious._

_Today, though, since I upped my intake of deliveries an infinite amount, I sorta...maxed out...my customers for a bit. See, I have regular customers that I make deliveries to once a week, and I usually hit them up on the same day, just keeping it spaced out and even._

_I made about sixteen deliveries early these past three days._

_And now I'm out of deliveries._

_So I've kinda...been hiding all day. Usually on a day when it's slow and I have no deliveries, I'll help Tifa out around the bar...but I mean, you can obviously see why I don't want to do that right now. Too much tension...too awkward..._

_So, instead, I've been working out like a mad dog in the basement. I haven't worked out this much in a long, long time. I yawn, placing the weight back into its rest, before sitting up on the bench._

_I'm itchy again...I think it's stress. It has to be stress...I mean what the hell else could it be? Who in their right mind itches this much with absolutely no reason? My face, my chest, my friggin legs. I feel like I'm on fire. That's all I've been doing...lift a weight, scratch...lift, scratch...lift scratch._

_I need a new routine._

_I sigh, folding my hands together to stare at them._

_What am I playing at here? Why hasn't she said anything? It's driving me crazy... I can't take much more of this, but I don't know how to bring up the topic of her pregnancy. I mean... what do you say?_

_Hey, I heard you were pregnant and since we make love on a regular basis, I was wondering if it was mine... If you could let me know, it'd just be a great weight off my chest, ya know._

_And then I might stop itching!_

"_You still down here?"_

_I flinch, glancing to the right. She's standing in the doorway, leaning against the wall._

_... I'm afraid to speak._

"_Listen, dinner is going to be ready soon...just thought I'd let you know."_

"_...thanks."_

"_Are you okay?" Her head tilts to the side, and she frowns slightly._

_She looks the exact same. Aren't pregnant women suppose to glow or something like that?_

"_Cloud?"_

"_Oh...yeah, I'm okay. Just tired."_

_She gives a small smile. "I bet; you've been going pretty hard these past couple of days. Just take it easy, alright?"_

_I nod my head. _

_Though, babies cost money. Lots of money._

_Babies..._

"_Well, head up in a bit, if you're hungry." She turns to head back out of the room._

_I sigh again, before leaning back._

_CLANK!_

_MOTHER FUCKER!_

_I hiss, rubbing the back of my head furiously._

_Of course only I, after spending seven hours down here, could possibly forget about the stupid metal bar right behind my head!_

_...babies._

_DAMMIT._

_xxx_

_Supper is sort of quiet. Marlene and Denzel chat enough, Tifa smiling and throwing in her own words when prompted. I sit silent and watch. _

_I don't think I'll quite ever understand why Tifa is hiding something so monumental from me. This is half me... this is half my doing. I deserve to know. I have a right to know._

_So why the heck do I not know?_

_Well... I know...but, I mean, I don't __**know**__...as in, Tifa hasn't told me._

_I pick at my food, stirring a macaroni across my plate. Tifa smiles at something Marlene says, and stands, picking up her plate. She maneuver her way to the kitchen, with a juicy little sway to her hips she doesn't even realize she has– and disappears through the doorway._

_This isn't...fair._

"_...yeah, I totally kicked her butt at hopscotch. She shouldn't have even tried." Marlene says wisely._

"_Instead of wasting your time on hopscotch, you should've been watching __**me**__ play soccer. It was awesome. I totally kicked this awesome goal and–_

_Thud._

"_Uh...Cloud?"_

_Thud._

"_Cloud? What on earth are you doing?!" Marlene asks._

_What does it look like I'm doing? I'm banging my head on the table. I have no life...nothing left if my fiancé doesn't even __**tell **__me we're pregnant._

_That's right. We're... You know, I've never understood the term of 'we're pregnant'. I mean, technically I'm not pregnant. A budding baby is not growing in my tummy, nor do I even posses the proper equipment to carry a...child._

_Man that's weird._

_I lift my head up slowly, and Marlene bursts into giggles. _

"_Cloud! There's a noodle on your face!" Marlene taps the center of her forehead._

"_Cloud," Denzel cackles. "What's __**wrong**__ with you?"_

_I glare at him. _

_That is the question of the century, Denzel, one that will never be answered._

_No...wait...the real question is 'what isn't wrong with me'._

_I hope he doesn't ask me that._

_I peel the noodle off my forehead. "Just don't tell Tifa."_

_My face itches like...well, like someone threw itching powder all over it._

_They break into giggles again and stick noodles on their faces until Tifa comes back in and scolds them._

_xxx_

_Tifa would be a good mother._

_She is a good mother. _

_She's had no training...so I don't see how she does so well with Denzel and Marlene. She just has this... presence about her that says 'I'm a damn good mother even though I'm technically not a mother'... if that makes any sense._

_I don't think I'd be a good father. As much as Tifa would say if she is the mother to Denzel and Marlene, then I am the father, I don't think I can see myself there._ _I more or less feel like the older brother...like a child sometimes. _

_I'm a grown ass man, dammit... I'm getting sick and tired of these insecurities._

_I think part of the reason why I'm so insecure, and so freaking out about this whole...baby situation is because Tifa hasn't told me, and since Tifa hasn't told me, I figure there has to be a good reason why Tifa hasn't told me... and the only good reason I can think of is that I'd be a shitty father._

_I mean, I've never had that father figure, and any type of male figure I could've had in my childhood hated me. My village hated me...and no one was going to take me under their wing and teach me how to be a man. I think that's part of the reason why I went to join SOLDIER. If anywhere you would learn to be a man, it would be there...that's what I thought. My mother...she brought me up, and she was good to me, better than any other mother could've been...but... she wasn't a man._

_The only father figure I guess could be Zack...but...he wasn't much of a father figure... an older brother, a best friend... but a father? Zack? Yeah, right._

_So... I'm like the least experienced father figure you can get..._

_No wonder Tifa wouldn't want to tell me she's pregnant._

_Footsteps echo on the floorboards._

_Tifa grins as she leans over the back of the couch. "There you are..."_

_She walks around the couch, and sits down on the opposite end, stretching her feet out to my chest, and leaning back on the arm of the couch._

_She sighs deeply, and snuggles down into the cushions. _

"_You know...I'm glad you finally took a day for yourself...seriously for yourself. Usually when you have a day off, you always shadow me around the bar. I appreciate that, but you deserved a day to yourself. You deserve several."_

_Too bad I spent this entire freaking day mopping._

_I pick up her feet with out asking, and start to rub them._

_See, I know she's happy for me, but she just made me feel guilty. Her feet are always killing her at the end of the night, and I just lounged here on the couch._

_Great. Now I feel like a complete and total ass._

"_Ah...thank you."_

_I grunt, shrugging._

_She stretches, and wiggles her toes in my face. _

_Oh, that's right. Now I have to start learning how to count piggies. One piggy goes to the market...that's all I remember._

_...the other piggy went to...to... the weapons dealer? _

_Yeah...that's a great nursery rhyme. _

_This little piggy went to the market, and this little piggy went to the weapons dealer, and __**that **__little piggy fought for his freaking life, but gratefully the other little piggy was a healer, and the last little piggy fire 3'd the other little piggies asses all the way home. _

_Yeah...I'm sure that'll put the baby right to sleep._

"_What's wrong?"_

_Great. Here it comes._

_Just spit it out. _

_You freaking pansy._

'_Speak.'_

_I'm not ready...I'm still brooding._

'_Speak!'_

_I'm not a dog!_

'_SPEAK!'_

_Dammit–freaking–I hate you._

_I study her foot as I rub it, concentrating deeply._

_Here goes nothing..._

"_You..."_

_She raises an eyebrow, but I focus on her toes._

_She sighs, narrowing her eyes, her face showing concerned. "What is it? You know you can tell me."_

_I swallow, and pinch my lips together._

_1..._

_2..._

_3..._

"_You...aren't...pregnant, are you?"_

_She freezes, and stares me down for a moment, her eyes wide open._

_Then she snorts._

_And starts laughing._

_Wait...what?_

_I stare at her, confused. I just asked a serious fucking question. Why the hell is she laughing at me?_

"_What?" I ask, and she just laughs harder._

_I sit up, mad. "Yes or no."_

_She rolls to the side, holding her stomach, and opens her mouth. _

_And wheezes._

"_What?"_

"_No!" she cries out, laughing._

_WHAT!?_

_I– can't! Not processing— brain no longer...functioning._

_WHAT THE HELL?! _

_She takes several deep breaths, and calms herself. _

"_Woo..." she breathes out sharply. "Was __**not**__ expecting that."_

_My jaw drops._

_She looks at me, and giggles. She clears her throat though, seeing that I'm freaking mad as hell!_

"_Uh...why...did you think that...?"_

"_Yuffie called the other day...she said she saw you in the Maternity Clothing Outlet."_

"_Ooooh," she says dramatically. "Wait...why did you listen to Yuffie?"_

_Dammit shit..._

_Why did I listen to that idiot?_

_I have no freaking clue._

"_Wait right here."_

_She stands quickly, and rushes out of the room. She returns in a moment, carrying a pink bag back in._

"_Look." She reaches in and pulls out a dark blue maternity dress. She holds it up to her shoulders in the dim lighting._

_So __**that's **__what she would look like if she were pregnant._

_Hot._

_Wait–_

"_I got it for Shera's birthday. It's coming up, you know...well, you might not have, but you do know Shera, and you know she isn't going to get anything nice to wear while she's pregnant...so, I was walking by, and I thought it'd be nice to give her something to go out in with Cid... Or, with other people...cause Cid probably doesn't go out too much."_

_She folds the dress back up and puts it back in the bag._

_She sighs, sitting down on the edge of the couch._

"_Cloud..." She smooths back a few stray hairs from my face and tilts her head to the side._ _"Don't you think I would've told you?"_

"_Why do you think I've been stressing out for the past four days?"_

_She smiles softly. "If I ever get pregnant–_

_When woman...I'd like to know I'm fertile._

"– _you'll be the first to know. I promise. Okay?"_

"_Even if it's not mine?"_

"_CLOUD!" She flushes deeply. "I won't ever tell you if it's not yours, because that'll never happen. It will always be yours...and only yours. You shouldn't even doubt that– _

_She cuts off, studying my face. "Oh I see...payback."_

_I smirk, lifting a shoulder._

_She leans in and kisses me sweetly on the lips._

_She pulls back though, and frowns. _

_She places both hands on the sides of my face and tilts my head towards the light."Have you been itchy lately?"_

_Oh yeah, the itch...at least I won't itch anymore because of stress. Ha ha, yeah bitches._

_Since she isn't pregnant, I won't have as much stress..._

_So why am I kind of disappointed?_

"_Cloud?"_

"_Oh...yeah. I think it was because of all the stress."_

_She tuts, shaking her head no. "Nope. It's because you've got poison oak. You're sleeping down here tonight...there's no way I'm letting you touch me till this clears up."_

_WHAT?! Not fair! Not fair at all! That is cruel and extremely drastic! I suffer, you suffer!_

_I grab her wrist before she can stand though, and pull her back down._

"_Ack! Cloud! It's all over your face! I swear, if I start itching_–

"_Then don't scratch."_

_She narrows her eyes, seething at me._

_But then she smiles and rolls her eyes. "I guess I can distract myself. So...do you want to practice?"_

"_Practice what?"_

_She leans in and whispers in my ear._

"_Making a bay?"_

_Game!_

**A/N: **LOL! I cannot believe you all fell for that! I mean, I surely thought at least one person wouldn't believe it! If you did, you stayed silent...course, I'm sure as you were reading Tifa's explanation, you were thinking the same thing as Cloud 'Why **did **I listen to that idiot?' It's okay, though. I was kinda happy to trick you all. Cue evil laughter.

Anyways, I want to thank you all for the support you gave me, and my friend and her mother. Just to let you know her mother is scheduled to move out of the ICU on Monday, and into a regular room. She's eating solids, and is doing awesome. I'm pumped cuz I get to see her Sunday. I cannot thank you enough for all the prayers, and good wishes. I know it helped : )

Anyways, I really hope you enjoyed this chapter (and the fast update) I'm in an awesome mood now, and felt bad about leading you all own (LOL– sorry) Thanks for all the lovely reviews! I remember reading one review that was like 'I love how Cloud lives in the early 90's' referring to Cloud's BITCHIN' moments... I about _died_...but then I couldn't find it... DX But it was hilarious...I love you guys!

BTW thanks for suggestions for Expo... I'll prolly end up going as Tifa. Aeris is too much work...and too much pink and too much girly which is NOT me... at all. Seriuozly. Some people suggested guys...but anime guys are like stick figures!...I've got too much up top, and there's not enough binding in the world to make that convincing XD but I do appreciate all the suggestions.


	68. Ultimate Suckery

_Ultimate Suckery_

_Well…this has got to be the most embarrassing thing I've worn since Cid's wedding. _

_Maybe I should back up…_

_"I'll only be gone for a week," she says...like a week is so incredibly short…like I can survive a __**week**__ with two children on my own._

_She obviously doesn't know me as well as she thought she did. _

_Whose bright idea was it not to hire a maid? Well, when Tifa is here I suppose she's the ma—_

_Okay…it's probably not even a good idea to think that. That idea is going to float off into the abyss of 'bad ideas' located at the back of the mind. She probably felt it though… I bet she's getting Cid to turn around right now and bring her back home so she can punch me in the gut._

_Tifa is not a maid._

_She's a bartender._

_I don't know how that helps…if that helps… _

_How about…Tifa is the hot, sexy, woman that I'm going to marry._

_There…she won't punch me in the gut for that._

_Moving on…_

_Eventually I'll figure out this whole not thinking like an idiot thing._

_"Kuh-loud!"_

_God, she's like a bullhorn, I swear. How does so much noise come out of such a little person?_

_"Don't yell up the stairs Marlene!" Great…now I even sound like Tifa._

_"But __**you**__ are too, Cloud!" _

_She's too smart… I hate smart kids. They make me feel like a stupid adult._

_Denzel glances at me from the table. _

_I point the spatula at him. "Eat your breakfast."_

_He swallows, picking up the toast, and taking a healthy bite._

_That's one thing to chalk up to successful execution. Toast! I no longer burn it._

_I think the score is like… Cloud – 6… World – five thousand…_

_Woo! I'm catching up! _

_Trust me…sarcasm is the only thing that makes life worth living._

_Well…one other thing makes life worth living…and I'm kinda missing the most important part for that to happen._

_Yeah, you try and figure that out all on your own._

_"Ouch! Son of a—_

_"Cloud! I've been calling you for like…five minutes! Where is my purple sweater?!"_

_I hate hot pots… you know one thing I've noticed? Men hate little pains. They can't take them. We smash our fingers…knee sharp corners…cut ourselves shaving…_

_And it freaking __**hurts**__._

_Women are just like… Oh? You're pouring hot wax on my hair so you can rip it off? Go right ahead. Cause, I do this on a regular basis, and this makes perfect sense. Yes I will take pain if it means no hair on my upper lip._

_RIP IT BABY!_

_Ahem…okay, so maybe that's a bit extreme…but you get the idea._

_I guess the reason why little pains don't bother them is cause they've been doing it a lot and on purpose. Beauty is pain…at least Yuffie told me that once._

_Don't know why she would know that… I don't exactly thinking beauty when I think Yuffie._

_Low blow, I know, but if she was teaching your kids how to make stink bombs then you'd be a little harsh as well._

_"Cloud!"_

_Speaking of children…_

_"I don't know Marlene… if Tifa didn't wash it before she left, then I doubt it's clean."_

_"But I really wanted to wear it! …why are you wearing Tifa's apron?"_

_Oh right…that…_

_It's hard to make aprons manly…especially when someone embroiders pink roses and sunflowers on the hem._

_How the hell do I even know that word? Embroidery… at what point and time did that enter my vocabulary? Wow…I really need some guy time._

_Denzel answers for me. "It's because Tifa comes home soon, and he's out of clean shirts…so he's trying to make this one last until she does."_

_Marlene smiles. "Well good! You can do some laundry, then, and wash my purple sweater."_

_"Uh… I don't think you want him to do that, Marlene."_

_"Why not?"_

_"Well," Denzel clears his throat, glancing at me. "He did his own laundry about two days ago…"_

_Marlene's eyebrows rise. "So why is he out of clean shirts?"_

_"Well, technically he has clean shirts…but they'd probably only fit your teddy bear, Chester."_

_Marlene giggles. "Awesome…new clothes for Chester!"_

_At least he'll be stylish… though I gotta say, I'm getting tired of people talking about me like I'm not even here._

_I'm right here. I could've sliced my finger off and they probably would still talk about my laundry skills… or lack there of._

_Marlene joins Denzel at the table. "Cloud, Tifa's going to be home in like… two days—_

_"Tomorrow actually," Denzel corrects._

_Marlene sends him a withering glare, and looks back at me. "I got that rehearsal for the school play tonight…and Denzel…" She glances at Denzel. "Well, Denzel just isn't capable."_

_"Hey, I'm perfectly capable."_

_"Of what, Marlene?"_

_"Cleaning this place." She states it as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. _

_"Cleaning?"_

_"Oh wait… you're right. I'm not capable. You're on your own Cloud."_

_"Yes, __**cleaning**__ Cloud. Have you swept once this week?"_

_… what?_

_"Swept?"_

_"How about the dishes?"  
_

_Bam, got that. "I washed the bar glasses last night." Tifa always does that… __**I **__can do that._

_"Uh…Cloud… what about the plates we eat off of?" She holds up Denzel's empty plate._

_Oh…_

_I was wondering why we were running out of forks.  
_

_Whoops._

_"Uh…"_

_"Did you make up your bed this morning?" she asks. "Tifa always makes up the bed."_

_"Did you?"_

_"Duh. I made mine up like… half an hour ago. Even Denzel did."_

_God I'm incompetent._

_"You can't even wash your shirts! And that's like…fool proof! Tifa's going to come home from her trip to a dirty house. Instead of unpacking and relaxing, she'll have to clean up your mess. It's one thing to take that on a day at a time, but you unfiltered for a whole week? That's a little overwhelming."_

_They way you're making me feel is a little overwhelming… damn…I hate getting put in my place by kids that haven't even reached the big one zero. That's a ten, people…keep up._

_"Fine… I'll…figure it out. I'll take the day off and clean up."_

_"But Cloud… I thought you had that delivery for ShinRa…" Denzel says._

_"ShinRa's not important… go to school."_

_Marlene puts her hands on her hips. "He financed our school, Cloud."_

_Where does she learn these words? Probably the same place I learned embroidery._

_"Not important. Leave."_

_Denzel stares at me blankly. "If school's not important, then why do I have to go?"_

_"__**Leave**__."_

_xxx_

_I still haven't gotten to the most embarrassing article of clothing since the skilt… Wearing a bandana around one's head can usually be considered bad ass… too bad mine's fuchsia with magenta flowers… or at least that's how Marlene described it. Trust me… I do not know those colors without the help of a female._

_Listen…my forehead's sweaty, and my hair is a greasy—after the whole 'you have to clean though you aren't capable' speech from Marlene…well, I had to clean…neglecting personal hygiene._

_Gross. Well, I spent a few months camping out with the gang…I should be used to feeling kind of gross…but I have become spoiled. Tifa's bathroom is like a heaven of smell good things, and bubbly concoctions. _

_Moving on…_

_Currently I'm washing the pile of dishes about three feet high. How do I not notice these things? How does Tifa do these things and take care of the bar? _

_The door bell rings._

_I don't have time for this…I'm elbow deep in dish detergent!_

_…how the mighty have fallen._

_"Cloud! There's someone here!" Denzel yells._

_"Kitchen!"_

_A few seconds later a lady enters…I think she's our neighbor._

_I suck with names._

_…and faces… and people in general._

_I just suck. I am the ultimate suckery._

_"Hey Cloud…"_

_"Hi…" Crap what's her name? Tifa would know her name…_

_"It's Julia."_

_"Yeah, I know." Nice recovery, asshole._

_"Could you deliver this to Kalm?" She holds out a package._

_"Uh… not today…I'm…" What's the word? Oh yeah. "Cleaning."_

_She laughs. "Yeah…I noticed the headwear."_

_Son of a bitch, I don't need that leaving the house._

_Denzel walks into the kitchen, adding a glass to my pile of dishes._

_"So I hear you and Tifa are finally getting married. Have you set a date?"_

_Please leave… I can't handle strange people right now asking questions—_

_"A month," Denzel says._

_"A month?!" Son of a bitch! What?! When did we set the date! I'm too freaked out to even notice the octave jumping! Holy—mother—I can't—_

_Julia is staring at me with wide eyes… I guess a man should know his wedding date… especially when it's only a freaking month away!_

_I clear my throat. "Yes… a month." Another smooth recovery. I'm on a roll._

_Crap… that's right._

_The night before she left for this trip… one month. This trip was so she could finalize a bunch of stuff for the wedding…meet up with Yuffie, and Shera. Oh son of a bitch! Where is my head?_

_"I'll show you out," Denzel says, leading Julia from the kitchen._

_Man, I sure am a freaking asshole. Not only do I trash our house while Tifa disappears for seven days, but I also can't even remember my freaking wedding date._

_Yep. I'm most certainly ready for marriage._

_Not._

_"Wow…are you stupid or something?" _

_Thanks Denzel… thanks a lot._

_"Just grab my wallet…go to the store and buy… flowers." I nod my head towards my wallet, sitting on the counter top._

_"Flowers? You think flowers will make up for forgetting your wedding date?"_

_"She won't have to find out."_

_Denzel rolls his eyes. "Yeah right. You just told __**Julia**__. She's like… the mouth of Edge. Seriously. Who do you think spread the rumor about you and the blue boxers?"_

_My God I thought it was Cid._

_Denzel crosses his arms smugly. "That's right. This'll be out in two minutes. Probably already is…she's been outside this bar for about thirty seconds. Plenty of time."_

_Son of a freaking bitch. "And truffles. Buy truffles."_

_"That's all?"_

_Uh… "Wine… buy wine."_

_"Cloud… I don't think a fake I.D. would work. Plus, this is a bar."_

_I knew that. I work well under pressure._

_"Just go!"_

_"Fine!" Denzel grabs my wallet and runs out of the kitchen._

_Crap… I need to make the bed. Denzel can do these dishes when he gets back._

_Hehehehe. No I am totally not bumming my work off on small, defenseless children. Denzel is definitely not defenseless. He's got Yuffie on his side._

_I turn around, and rush upstairs to our room. It's been kinda lonely in here, I have to say. I'll be glad when she gets home. _

_I turn to face the window. This is the window that I fell out of into the dumpster into the alley. Something catches my eye, and I push the window open, and lean out. _

_There she is… Julia._

_Crap, she's talking to another woman…scratch that, several women._

_…If I lean out a bit… I can almost…_

_"…he freaked out when he heard it was in a month. I always thought Tifa could do better than him." _

_"Definitely," Strange woman number one says. _

_"She had such a rough time when the boy had Geostigma," Strange woman number three says._

_"You know how hard it is to raise two children? Let alone support them? Being a single mother is tough…I know," Strange woman number two growls._

_Those __**bitches**__ …are probably right._

_Maybe that was a little uncalled for. Still…talking behind my back?_

_"Well, I know the boy is at least his…" Julia starts. "They act so much a like."_

_What is she talking about?_

_"I think the girl is theirs too…though I've seen pictures in Tifa's room of another woman who looks a lot like the little girl. Sometimes I wonder if she's from a previous marriage with Cloud."_

_… previous… marriage? I'm so confused. I'm just now getting married. How can I have a previous one? _

_"Oh yeah! I've seen those," Number three says. "I've thought that too. Maybe that's why he has such commitment issues."_

_I do __**not **__have commitment issues._

_I do not have issues period._

_These women have issues. They need lives…I'm not that interesting that I should be the center of their confusing conversation._

_"Which one is older…the boy or the girl?" Julia asks._

_"I'm not sure," Number one shakes her head. "They're so close in age."_

_"How young did Tifa have to be to have her? That has to be early teens… imagine getting pregnant that early."_

_Tifa's never __**been **__pregnant. I know this. I'm the one who would cause this to happen…and it hasn't._

_I can't wait till Tifa gets home…she can beat the crap out of the gossiping biddies. _

_I have half a mind to yell at them. I mean, they're talking in plain sight, right outside of the bar!_

_I go to maneuver my shoulders out the window, but I get stuck. I jerk back, trying to free myself. My elbow hits the sill, and the next thing I know… I know nothing._

_Cryptic, huh?_

_xxx_

_"…hey! I'm home! I know I'm early, but really… Cloud! Cloud…come out! I want to thank you for the flowers!"_

_Oh my head… what the hell happened?_

_"Cloud! Cloud— Oh my God! Cloud!"_

_Where am I?  
_

_Am I stuck in the window?_

_How the hell did I manage that? Why do I even ask anymore? If someone can do it, then I will._

_Tifa's hands are on my back, and she pushes the window up, freeing my neck, and right arm._

_"Ow…"_

_"Cloud! What on earth!" Tifa's leaning in my face, helping me to the bed._

_"Ow." I can't turn my neck._

_"Cloud…are you okay?"_

_"Yeah." Ow. Little pains suck ass._

_She smiles. "Good… at least your poison oak has cleared up…but this house is a __**mess**__."_

_"Welcome home."_

_She kisses my cheek, grinning. "It's okay. I expected no less. I'd feel pretty useless if you could keep everything in order."_

_"Who is Julia?"_

_Tifa frowns, blinking. "She lives across the street."_

_"She gossips."_

_Tifa nods._

_"She thinks you've had children."_

_Tifa nods again. "She thinks Denzel is our illegitimate love child that we had when we were teenagers, and are just now getting married. She thinks Marlene is yours and Aeris' child, and that you have issues because she left you."_

_"Are you serious?" I totally didn't get that. Wow. _

_I…_

_Wow… My mind can't process that. _

_"Yeah… I've stopped trying to straighten it out."_

_"I think she should shut her trap."_

_"Be nice, Cloud… thank you for the flowers, by the way."_

_"Oh…right…"_

_"You did one thing right while I was away… buying chocolate is always the answer…and a big stuffed animal always helps too."_

_Nice improvisation, Denzel. _

_She sighs, pressing her forehead up against mine. "One month, Cloud."_

_"Yeah…" At least I'm not freaking out like the last time I heard that. "By the way… I'm going to need a new wardrobe."_

_"I told you to stay away from the washing machine."_

**A/N: **OMG OMG I LIVE! I've surfaced from beneath the depths of school work and work, and moving and other crap, and I emerge to write! There are so many nice people on this website XD there are annoying people too, but I take those with the nice people and accept them for who they are. I thank you, reviewers, readers etc. for being so patient with me. End of school stress is a beast, don't cha think? I don't think this chapter is quite up to my standards, but it really has been tooooo long since I updated this. I need to get back in the Cloud Zone. BTW I do know when this story is going to end, and yes, the wedding is in a month (roughly) not like, a literal month, but you get the idea. So, I'm debating on whether or not to warn you guys when this story is going to end. I could be nice, or I could be mean (MUHAHAHA) but I haven't decided yet. It'll be a while, though, and I've got an AWESOME ending planned.

Till next time, loves! Thanks for the reviews (Broke 1400, DAMN YOU GUYS ROCK)


	69. Twilight

_Twilight_

_"So how did shopping go?" I'm flipping through the newspaper. The new highway in Junon is finally supposed to be open, and that will cut down delivery times exponentially to that area._

_Tifa blushes radiantly, resting her pen against her lips. "Great. Yuffie's freaking out, as usual."_

_I shrug. That's a given._

_Tifa's got a notepad up against her knees, curled up on the couch beside of me. Every now and then she reaches out and pinches me with her big toe. It's like a bloody crab is sitting next to me... a freaking cute ass crab with a great tush._

_"I've started making a list of guests... I figured you want to keep it small... I mean, I do. You do still want a small wedding, right?" She glances at me from across the couch._

_I raise an eyebrow. I mean, how many people do I know that she doesn't know? And still, how many of that selected few would I actually want to invite?_

_She puts the pen to the notepad. "That's what I thought..." she mutters. "Obviously Denzel and Marlene are going to be the ring bearer and flower girl respectively. You stlil need to pick a best man."_

_"Have you choosen a maid of honor yet?"_

_She narrows her eyes crossly. "That's beside the point." She jabs the pen at me menacingly. "I asked you first."_

_"I'll...choose soon."_

_She smiles, and pinches me with her toes again. "Let's see...we should definitely invite..."_

_This whole notepad is like the planner to our entire wedding. She and Yuffie have stapled and taped magazine clippings, fabric samples, napkins, invitations, envelopes, and wax flowers(obviously they'll be fresh for the wedding...they just want to keep track of what they like) all into the pages of the notepad. It looks like a nest of all things wedding...-ly. _

_Some pages are forbidden to me i.e. the pages about the ...**dress**. Hell, they've got me excited with all the secrecy they have around these specially marked pages. Red pen, not black._

_Currently Tifa is holding a black pen. Black means Cloud friendly. Red means if you catch Cloud even glancing at this page whilst across the other room beat the ever lasting crap out of him._

_Or so Yuffie says._

_I mean, don't get me wrong. There isn't alot of red ink pages. Tifa's trying to keep me as involved in the planning as possible. Unlike Cid, who just threw all wedding suggestions at Shera. I mean, Cid doesn't want to plan a wedding, not even his own. That's just not Cid..._

_Don't think that I'm not manly though, just cause I want to have a say in my wedding and how it goes. I don't think that's too much of pansy behavior._

_I'm happy with the small contributions I make... Tifa is letting me take care of the tuxedo stuff. She said it was all up to me, though I secretly think she hired Yuffie to stay on my ass the entire time. Yuffie, I believe, is the only person who has a complete vision of this wedding since she's stalking me about tuxedos and Tifa about every thing else which kinda pisses me off._

_Well, Yuffie just pisses me off..._

_There has to be some way... some how I can embarass Yuffie at my wedding. It's only fitting since she delivered the news of the dreaded kilt. That's the third time a woman has told me I needed to wear a dress of some kind for a friend... The skilt incident...well, that was close enough to a dress and if I remember correctly Tifa threatened me bodily harm. the other obvious one being for Tifa at Don Corneo's. Aerith always was a genius..._

_Yeah... those were the good old days... _

_I mean...well, not exactly. I don't consider cross dressing a good old day... nor chasing around a mass murderer... but the people... they were..._

_Ahem... well, moving on..._

_I can't embarass Cid...I mean, I could force Cid to be the only one to wear a kilt to the wedding, but, he might do that anyways... I should ban him from wearing the kilt... and anyways... as much crap as Cid gives me, Yuffie gives me tenfold. Yuffie...is like... the spawn of all darkness. She is the root of all evil and I need to think of a way to make her pay for what she's done to me over the years. But... it's not like telling her to wear a kilt to my wedding will do much good. A kilt is practically a dress, and she'll do anything to show off her legs... especially if Reno is there-_

_WAIT. STOP. Why the **hell **did I even just think that? That's ridiculous. I mean, why in the world would Reno even be considered to be invited to our wedding?_

_"And I guess if we invite him, it would be awfully rude not to invite the rest of them..."_

_My eyes snap up from the paper. "The rest of who?"_

_Tifa blinks, frowning. "The Turks. Weren't you listening?"_

_Uh. No._

_"We're inviting the Turks?"_

_"Yeah, and Rufus."_

_"**Rufus**?"_

_"Well, it would be rude to invite Reno and them and then not invite Rufus-_

_"Why are we inviting Reno?"_

_"Cloud!" Tifa's eyes are wide. "Because...Yuffie is dating Reno now. It's only fitting that we should invite her boyfriend."_

_It's only fitting that we should murder her boyfriend **and** his boss._

_"Oh..." Do you not remember what happened the last time I saw Reno? I broke his nose with the door and that was on my birthday when he was trying to give me a card and be nice. I don't think the preacher will take to kindly to me inflicting bodily harm on our wedding guests. And I know I **really **won't take kindly to a wedding guest hitting on my bride. I mean, he might not even get drunk before he hits on her. Yuffie will probably be standing right beside of him too, laughing and being like, 'O M G (yes, she would actually just say the letters) Reno, stop! You are so-o funny. He's such a flirt.' All the while Reno is oogling Tifa in a wedding dress._

_...it doesn't matter. I'm not inviting him anyways._

_And if we do, I'll just break his nose with the church's door._

_"You can't hurt him this time."_

_Damn...I forgot she can read my mind._

_"But...what if...they break up between now and then?" Since when were they a declared couple? I thought Reno was playing Yuffie! That was the only way I'd ever have respect for that man and he just went and blew it! I respect anyone who can even slightly torment Yuffie._

_"I don't think that's going to happen..." Tifa says, flipping a page in her notepad._

_And why not?! "Really?"_

_"Yeah...well, according to Yuffie she's been blabbing to Reno about all the wedding plans...and that kinda is what got them on the boyfriend/girlfriend track."_

_They aren't getting married are they?!_

_"Though, I have to say that neither one of them strike me as a serious couple sort. I can never see Yuffie getting married, Reno or whoever."_

_Mr. I'm-not-really-a-vampire-just-manic-depressive. Hehehehe._

_"Why are you smiling?"_

_"No reason."_

_She grins mischeviously. "Are you that excited about Reno coming to the wedding?"_

_I glare._

_She laughs. "Come on Cloud...be a sport. Think about it...if I don't do this, when Yuffie gets married she won't invite you to the wedding. She'll just invite me."_

_"You just said you could never see her getting married." And who said I'd want to go to her wedding anyways? I feel sorry for the poor soul that gets locked to her with a gold band. She'll probably get a tracking device placed in it so she can find him when he runs for his life. _

_Scratch that... maybe she and Reno **should **get married._

_Evil thoughts are wrong...but oh so right._

_"Cloud."_

_"Sorry."_

_She tilts her head to the side. "Is it really that bad for you?"_

_I sigh, putting the paper down. "We just...don't get along." That's the understatement of the century._

_She frowns. "Well, couldn't you at least try?"_

_I have tried! Well...maybe... not really... But... I mean...how do you exactly expect me to get along with this guy? He's insane! I hate him._

_She sighs, and turns her head away. Her forehead furrows in concentration._

_Wait... what are we doing here?_

_Why are we sitting on this couch debating about wedding guests? Shut up... we still have like a month. Get over it._

_The kids aren't here... we're alone. Why are we just sitting here?_

_I toss the paper on the coffee table and stand. "Come on."_

_She looks up at me. "What?"_

_I sigh. Sometimes she's slow._

_...or maybe I should just work on my comunication skills._

_"Up." I hold my hand down to her._

_"Where are we going?" she asks cautiously. She takes my hand slowly and I pull her up._

_"Out."_

_"Will you use more than one word in your sentences? And where to?" She follows me as we walk through the kitchen._

_She should be used to my one word sentences by now. "'Come on' had two words." I open the garage door and head towards Fenrir._

_"Cloud..." she growls, and stops._

_I turn to face her, frowning. Now she's got me brooding...she should feel guilty. _

_Fenrir is lonely and needs a sexy woman to sit on him. That's where we're going. ...her hands are on her hips, though. I probably shouldn't say anything that involves the word 'sexy' right now. Be romantic... be be romantic!_

_Yes I do have to chant a cheer to be romantic... how else am I to subtract my manliness willingly?_

_"Just trust me, okay?" I swing my leg over Fenrir, and hold my hand out to her again._

_She sighs and rolls her eyes before taking my hand and climbing on behind me. I hand her back her goggles...yes, I officialy bought her a new pair of goggles for this purpose only... too bad they haven't gotten much use yet. She straps them over her eyes, and grins goofily at me. I start Fenrir, and roll out of the garage slowly._

_There is no hesitation as her arms wrap around my waist and no surprised jump from me; even still, I let my hand linger on hers before gunning it out in traffic._

_I think it's hard to believe it all sort of started out this way...riding away from Seventh Heaven one night for a picnic...granted the only food I've got on Fenrir tonight is a granola bar and a bottle of water, but still. Me and Tifa are getting ready to get married, and we haven't had a lot of alone time lately. There's always something with the bar, or my job, or the wedding, or the kids, or our freaking insane ass friends... alone time is few and far between, and I have had hardly any time to really take Tifa out in the first place._

_The bitter wind is starting to bite into my shoulders... twilight is here, and I can see the small pinpoints in the sky starting to appear. I should've brought a coat... there might be a blanket in Fenrir somewhere..._

_She sighs when we roll to a stop, seeing where we are... the same clearing we had our first date on. Oh yeah, I can be romantic bitches._

_I rub my arms, and neither of us move from Fenrir though. She squeezes my waist tighter, feeling how tense my shoulders are._

_She kisses my shoulder. "What is it, Cloud?" she asks, resting her chin on my shoulder._

_I don't look at her... of course it is I, Mr. Anti-social of the century that drags her out her on a freezing night cause I can't talk about anything without putting fifty miles between me and the nearest stranger... or close friend... I'm sure you can figure out who I'm talking about..._

_I hold her hands in mine, and stare at her ring. "I think... ... ... ..."_

_Long pauses suit me... Shut up! Don't make fun of me!_

_"You think..." she coaxes, pressing her nose into my ear._

_Yeah, that's going to help me think straight._

_Not._

_"I think...I haven't picked a best man because my best friend is dead." I say slowly. _

_Woot! I got it all out in one try! _

_Man this is a crappy thing to be talking about, and no, I do not have mood swings in my head._

_She sighs, and presses her forehead into my back. "Oh Cloud..."_

_Great...now I've depressed her and myself. This is why I try not to open my big freaking idiotic mouth._

_She laces her fingers with mine. "I was hoping it wasn't that...but...I guess I knew."_

_I knew she was a psychic._

_"I kind of understand... we lost a lot of friends... you know. After...it began in Nibelhiem I had a hard time trusting people. I never had really any close friends until I met Barret and Marlene. It was still hard for me to trust them...because of my naiive trust I had as a girl. I did make close friends, but I lost a lot of those too...and it wasn't until after I saw how everyone had my back, and protected me when we were on our journey fighting together that I truly trusted them. I envy you because you were able to trust someone enough that they became your best friend."_

_My head raises at this... I never thought...anyone would ever envy me for anything I was. Maybe for something I had... like the kids, or Tifa, or our friends... even our house or my damn sexy bike...but never for who I was, or had been able to do. I had trusted Zack, and it got me through one of the toughest times in my life. He was an easy person to trust... he never broke a promise..._

_Well, there was one..._

_"That probably didn't sound right..." Tifa says, more to herself than me. I allow a small, sad smirk. "I think...well, I know I lost a close person to me...who might've been my best friend, but at that time I wasn't able to make that judgement."_

_"Mmm."_

_She sniffs, and puts her cheek againt my shoulder blade. "You know what, though?"_

_"What?" I glance over my shoulder at her. She's smiling, keeping the tears from falling._

_"You're my best friend now. I don't doubt that, not one bit. I don't think I could if I tried."_

_I smile. "Yeah?"_

_"Mmm hmm." She grins, nodding her head._

_"Are you sure? Cause I can be a pretty nasty guy."_

_"I don't think you're as bad as you think you are... you're a big softie under it all." She pokes me in the side._

_"Ouch."_

_She giggles. "That's not necessairily a bad thing."_

_I squeeze her hand, facing forward again. After a moment I find my voice...I can't believe I'm saying this._

_"Reno can come."_

_"Really?" I hear the astonishment in her voice._

_I nod my head swiftly. "Yes. It doesn't matter who is there or who isn't there... it isn't about them. It's about us..." I look at our hands again. "Besides...they'll be watching."_

_"Yes... they will."_

_I turn my head, and look her in the eye. My neck is about to break, but I manage to lean in and kiss her full on the lips._

_First uninterupted kiss in for FREAKING ever... well, maybe not that long, but it sure feels like it._

_She sighs against my mouth. "Do you want to go?" I ask her._

_"No... I want to watch the stars a little longer... with you."_

_I grin._

_'GO CLOUD YOU DAWG'_

_For fuck's sake he's like a child!_

**A/N: **Snarky Zack... I love him. Hello my lovlies! Prepare for a super long A/N... SERIOUSLY I HAVE ANNOUNCEMENTS. Good news first.

Anime Expo WAS AWESOME. I had such a blast running around as Tifa... it was so much fun, cept i tripped on my cape running through the hotel and got MAD carpet burn... I figured out how to run in it after that. TIFA WAS DOWN but she got back up. I was surprised so many people asked me for a picture...I must have done her some justice. Yay! Unfortunately, my goal (this is slightly bad news) of taking a picture with 20 hot clouds and zacks did not come true (cry for me people) there really weren't that many clouds and zacks there (and not all of them were male (not that I have anything against that I just didn't want the Fems (although one made a really good cloud (and no Cloud does not look like a woman in the first place)))) Ahem... unfortunately I didn't see anyone (well, I might have saw you but not know you) from here! Weep... ah well, hopefully I'll go again next year and see somebody. I'll post some pictures somewhere as soon as I get them... my friend has them

Avatar came to an end the other night (I'm assuming some of you have heard of this little show) I personally did not enjoy the hunky dory ending, but it is nickolodeon, and that couldn't even say katara's mom died. They had to say she was GONE and they weren't taking prisioners! Oh wait, it's a kids show...my bad! Ahem... I'm really not a fan of kataang (or what ever the hell it is) I like Zutara (is that right? dont kill me!) but I detest absolutely with a passion Zuko's girlfriend Mae... like seriously...she strikes me as a bad write in Mary-Sue... I'm sorry, I said it but that's what I think. I hope I didn't offend anyone. And I also hope Zuko and Katara have a love child. SCANDAL

In other unfortunate news, we recently had to put down my dog... which was a reason for the delay. Thank you for all the condolences, and good wishes. He was 14 years old, and led a full life. He will be missed greatly.

And finally, I'm probably going to ruin your day with this Diaries will end...

Can you guess when?

After the wedding. I'm sorry to announce this as this has been my favorite story to write by far, and I love everyone's reviews, and appreciate the support...but my brain is running low for fuel of this, and there are other stories I want to work on. Plus I've never been married (THANK GOD that hasn't happened yet) so I feel like that experience will come in due time. Maybe six years down the road when I've found my hubby, I'll do a sequel to diaries about marriage. If you're truly faithful (and if I am too) you'll stick around for that. No I do not know how many chapters it will be before it ends (cuz I never right the chapters out) but I haven an **EPIC** ending planned...like seriously... IT WILL ROCK YOUR WORLD. I hope.

Till next time my loves! Don't kill me yet! Wait till I finish the story at least!

**OMG **this was 2700 words before I wrote this...now it's like...3300 I'm sorry XD


	70. The Bachelor Party

_The Bachelor Party_

_Tifa sits at her vanity, putting her earrings on._

_I sulk sitting on the bed, watching her. She looks up, catching my eyes in the mirror, and turns to look at me._

_She raises her eyebrows. "What's wrong?"_

_I sigh, looking away._

_She narrows her eyes, and then a smile spreads slowly across her face. "I know what it is..." She stands slowly, walking slinkily over, her little black dress riding up on her hips deliciously. She wraps her arms around my stiff shoulders. "You're mad because I'm kicking you out."_

_I grumble something inaudible, I'm not even sure what I'm trying to say._

"_Cloud, come on!" Tifa releases me, leaning back. She brushes a few stray hairs from my face. "You'll have a great time tonight, I promise. Barret, and Cid worked so hard to plan this party for you! Not to mention, I want to enjoy mine, too, and I can't do that if I'm worrying about you. Just try to have a good time."_

_That's not it._

"_I'm not worried about Cid or Barret."_

_Tifa looks relieved. "Good. Every other man is pumped for their Bachelor party... I'd be kind of worried if you weren't. But, if that's not it...then what is it? I mean, if anything I should be upset because you guys are going to a rival bar to celebrate."_

_That's only because you ladies are kicking us out._

"_Hey. Yuffie was the one who planned mine... not me. I __**still **__don't know what the night holds, ok?"_

"_Then why are you dressed up?"_

"_Because Yuffie told me to. You know her...she's unpredictable."_

_Yeah, well, she better not have hired any strippers._

_She wouldn't...right?_

"_So if it isn't the actual party, what is it?"_

_Are you kidding me? Really? You __**know **__what it is! You just don't want to admit it!_

"_I mean, I know Yuffie helped Barret and Cid with the party, are you worried she like planned some ridiculous outing? Sure, she's crazy but she's not–_

_She cuts off, realization dawning on her face. "Oh. She invited Reno, didn't she?"_

"_She invited Tseng, Rude, and Rufus, too."_

"_**Ooooh**__. That's why you're mad."_

_Duh._

"_Oh. Well, if it makes you feel any better she invited_ _Elena to mine."_

"_She's a bridesmaid." I don't know how I'm controlling my voice right now._

"_Yeah, but..." She looks away, defeated. "You don't even know if they'll show up!"_

"_I don't have to." It's bad enough she invited them._

_Tifa looks up at me slowly. "Is that all you can think about, though?"_

_Oh...now I've pissed her off._

"_Of course not."_

_She stands excitedly then. "Listen. After tonight it's going to get serious, so you might as well enjoy it while you can."_

"_You'll be a slave driver, won't you?" _

_Tifa frowns. "I didn't mean that... it's just... well, I won't see you until we get to Cosmo Canyon, and then there will be so much to get ready and set up! It's happening Cloud..." She smiles, and I can tell she's doing everything not to cry. "We're getting married."_

_I grab her hand, squeezing it. "Yeah. We are."_

_She smiles sweetly, and I lean in to kiss her._

_BANG! _

"_Alright! I'm freaking tired of waiting! You're __**late **__Cloud! Tifa!"_

_Our heads snap apart, and I have time to catch Yuffie sliding across the door._

_Tifa looks up, startled. "Yuffie! Come on, give us one more minute!"_

_Yeah, we were about to hit a great make out session fueled by deep feelings of love._

_And lust._

_Woo._

_And __**you **__ruined it! You always ruin it!_

"_Yeah," Yuffie scoffs. "I can see you two were __**real **__busy." Yuffie reaches down, grabbing Tifa's arm and towing her away from me._

"_Hey!" Bring her back! She's mine!_

_I stand quickly, following as Yuffie tugs my bride to be down the steps._

_As they reach the bar, I see a gathering of women I recognize and don't recognize. I freeze, like a deer caught in headlights. This is not happy territory for me._

"_Oh good, you followed like a good boy." Yuffie looks at me, putting a hand on her hip._

_That was rude. "Listen–_

"_Shut up!" Yuffie pushes me towards the door, poking my sides. "Go! Go!"_

"_But we were–_

_Yuffie glares at me gravely. "You'll have plenty of time for making out when you're married." She lifts up her leg inhumanly high, and plants her giant foot on my chest. "Now OUT!" She kicks me out the front door. I sprawl backwards, stumbling out onto the street. Yuffie slams the door shut._

_I just got kicked out of my own house._

_Nice. Real nice._

_I sigh, slowly heading for the garage and climb onto Fenrir. I guess I am late, but... there are more important things to me than my bachelor party. I'm worried, especially if Yuffie had a hand in both mine and Tifa's party. Who knows what to expect?_

_I start Fenrir up, drowning out the girlish laughter coming from the bar, and ease my way out of the garage. By the end of this week, I will be married._

_WOW._

_I shiver... it shouldn't be that big of a deal... I mean, Tifa and I almost act like a married couple now. Well, I guess. I don't really know many married people other than Cid and Shera, and I sure as hell hope I don't act like Cid. The only other people I know would be some people I deliver to, but people are all the same, and all put up these images that the picture perfect family would be. There are a few families where chaos is usually prevalent. Those_ _are usually the one with the children._

_I know that chaos to an extent, with Marlene and Denzel... but some of these families have kids that are like three or two._

_It's a chaos that scares the living daylights out of me, but one that I think I'll be happy to see._

_Marriage and love do strange things to people's minds._

_I'm going to get married._

_Holy crap! A bachelor party is definitely within need! I need to drink myself into a stupor, a great enough of a stupor that will make me forget that the Turks are there._

_And Rufus._

_Shit._

_The bar that we're going to is only about 100 blocks away, or five miles. But still, I don't want to walk a mile let alone five. I'm not in the mood._ _Plus if Yuffie doesn't hear me leave, she might come out here to chase me away. She wouldn't put it pass me to skip my own bachelor party because of the guests._

_I arrive in about five minutes because of retarded traffic lights. The bar seems pretty quiet; it is a Monday night. Cid, Barret, Vincent, Nanaki, Rude, and even freaking RUFUS is sitting around a few tables. They're already drinking, and I think if they were all sober they wouldn't be having as hardy of conversation that they are right now._

_Cid is sputtering to Rude about something, and then they all laugh._

_I can't do this. I'm not the normal guy that begs for strippers (have you seen my fiancé? She's HOT) or mass quantities of alcohol ( I really don't want the Turks to know I'm a bit of a lightweight). That, plus the fact that I'm just not a social guy, really. Oh well._

_I'll get through this night, and I'll have a good time, for Tifa's sake._

_Cid laughs when he spots me walking sulkily towards them. "Hey! Bartender! Another round of shots!"_

_Vincent gives me a withering look; I'm sure his social ability has been put to an ultimate strain already. But he's here for me, so I appreciate that._

_Barret grins shakily, shoving a shot glass into my hand. "Drink up, pretty boy. Tonight you drink as a single man. It's your last night as one."_

_I'm not single... I'm getting married. I shrug, though, and tip the shot back into my mouth._

"_Hey there Spike-O!" A hand slaps into my back, and I choke on the burning liquid. I cough, spurting up the shot, and my nose burns. I think I lost some nose hair._

_I turn around, my eyes watering from the burning sensation. _

_Reno grins cheekily. "What's wrong? Getting emotional about your impending marriage? I'm sure it's a very touching moment for you."_

_I wipe my eyes furiously, and glare at him. My fist comes up reflexively, and I swing it forward._

_Someone catches my wrist and Cid grins. "That's no way to start a party! Come on, Cloud! The night is young! Drink up!"_

_Cid gives me another shot, and I glance at Reno warily as I take it smoothly this time. Reno just grins back at me._

_Barret looks at me seriously, his eyes bloodshot, and shakes a finger at me. "Getting married is serious business, ya' here?"_

"_Yes." I think we've only had this conversation like, a million times._

"_You know, when I got married...times were different. We were living in a suppressed world."_

_Rufus coughs into his hand._

_Barret glares at him. "I know yo' punk ass is there. You can't deny it though."_

_Cid groans. "Hey...hey. Let's not get political! This is supposed to be a celebration!"_

"_Or a condemning." Reno smiles wickedly over a glass. I glare at him, but he ignores me. "How long have you guys been drinking, anyway? Barret looks like he's about to collapse."_

_Cid shrugs. "Dunno. We got here early, and your punk ass was late. So was his" Cid points at me. _

"_How can you be late for your own bachelor party, really?" Reno asks. "We've got some great stuff planned for you. Me and Yuffie took care of it... it'll be a great night."_

_I roll my eyes. I'm sure._

_Barret glances at me. "You two need to catch up. Even Rufus has had more to drink than your pansy ass."_

_Reno grins. "I got a good game... chandeliers. Everybody grab a glass and something strong. It's going to be a __**long **__night. Nanaki, you playing?"_

_Nanaki stares at him. "Does it involve lifting glasses."_

"_Well, ya gotta chug."_

"_I don't have apposable thumbs. Get me a bowl."_

"_Hells yah!"_

_Reno puts us through a game that involves chugging...not one of my fortes. Not to mention he's making us chug screwdrivers which seems a little extreme. I mean screwdrivers are made for taste. Why chug them? Why dilute the alcohol?_

_Yes...my personality tweaks with the addition of alcohol, like every other person!_

"_So...so then Yuffie says... 'Well, by that time I had managed to dislodge the-the cactus from his butt, but then he was __**really **__screaming so I– so I– _

_Reno snorts, gasping for air. "So I punched him on the nose and told him to quit his bitching!"_

_Barret roars with laughter, and Cid has tears in his eyes, and he bangs the table, making the glasses rattle. I snort, trying to keep the high pitch giggle quiet. If they ever heard that, then none of them would let me forget it._

"_What about you, Barret? Did your wife ever do anything crazy?" Cid asks, leaning forward._

"_Of course... she married me didn't she?!"_

_The group busts into laughter again. It isn't that funny, but were beyond tipsy at this point. Anything will be remotely entertaining._

_I don't think even Reno can piss me off at this point._

_Reno sighs, looking at his watch. "Man... where the hell is she?"_

_Cid waggles his eyebrows. "Who fire crotch?" _

_Reno chucks an empty beer bottle at him, and Cid cackles. _

_Barret stares at him with watery eyes. "You... you cheatin' on Yuffie?"_

_Rufus grins, elbowing Rude with a knowing look. "There's now ay Reno could ever cheat on Yuffie. He's in love."_

_Reno punches his boss on the shoulder. "Shut up! No! I'm not cheatin on Yuffie, but I do appreciate the differing eye candy that women's bodies can vary."_

"_What?" Half the table asks._

"_I like look at women." Reno glares at us. "And I ordered you a stripper. She should've been here–_

"_Whoa! Stop. Go back." Reno glances at me. "You ordered me a __**stripper**__? What made you think I wanted a stripper?"_

_Reno chuckles. "Big boy, you're gettin married. This is the last woman you technically should see naked. I'm not saying Tifa's ugly, she's anything but– calm down! I'm not hitting on her! It's just, a true man can appreciate the many forms a woman's body can come in."_

"_Still!" I didn't want a stripper! There's only one woman I want to see strip!_

"_Listen." I stand up violently, my legs wobbling. Cid chuckles._

"_No, you listen." Reno stands too. "You'll thank me later, just like Tifa will thank Yuffie."_

_Barret frowns, his brow wrinkling. "Why would Tifa thank Yuffie because you got Cloud a stripper?"_

"_Yeah? Why would she?" Cid leans on his elbows._

_My hands start to shake, and I point at Reno. "You... you didn't."_

_Reno grins. "I __**didn't**__. Yuffie did. I just gave her the number to the place I used. Quality people."_

"_You asshole! You're girlfriend ordered my fiancé a stripper?!"_

"_Come on... calm down Cloud. You're getting one!"_

"_I...don't...want...one," I say through gritted teeth. I pick up a full whisky bottle, take a quick swig from it and point at Reno. "You."_

"_Me?"_

"_You're coming with me and fixing this."_

"_You can't go there! Yuffie will kill you! She'll kill me!"_

"_Don't you care that your girlfriend has a stripper?!"_

_Reno shrugs, infuriating me. "Hey. She doesn't care that we got one, am I right fellas?" Reno chuckles._

_That's when I grab him by the shirt collar and start to haul him across the bar floor. "Hey! Lemme go!"_

"_No. You're comin with me."_

"_Hold on." _

_I stop, jerking around, and swaying. Vincent's standing up._

"_You... cannot stop me."_

_Vincent nods his head. "I know. But you aren't driving. Hand me your keys." _

_I frown, pressing my lips together tightly. But I dig around in my pockets, tossing him the keys to Fenrir. _

_I sniff. "It's not like I was going to let this asshole ride Fenrir. Take care of him, Vince."_

_Vincent nods his head, pocketing the keys._

_I drag Reno outside, and we stumble out into the cold air. _

_Reno grumbles as we start down the street. "Five miles you asshole. Five fucking miles. Can't let her have fun can you?"_

_I push him into a wall._

"_Can't keep your nose out of my business, can you?"_

"_Hey. Yuffie's my girlfriend."_

"_That was your poor decision making. Tifa is my fiancé. You caused this problem, you're helping me fix it."_

_Asshole._

**A/N: **:D This ought to be an interesting five miles... dont cha think? Prepare for some friggin laughs next chappie. So sorry for the late update, but I really do appreciate all the reviews. 1515?! You guys are so awesome. Also, thanks to **Iskra Revoir **for helping me decide where to marry these two off. That was delaying this chapter. BLAME MY INDECISION!

Till next time, loves!


	71. Let's Never Mention This Night Again

**A/N: **This is to kyd I would love to respond to your message accordingly but I can't figure out who you are (i'm terrible) so I have to reply here (I'd actually prefer specifics that cause you to feel this way. I'm not mad! And no one is allowed to attack you!) The reason I think Cloud seems OOC sometimes is because it is his head, which doesn't get projected to anyone else. I like to think Cloud's a bit more wild and expressive in his head...and remember I am a girl...I try my best to get a guy's mind right, but...I can only do so much. SO I really would appreciate it if you could just let me know what specificly makes him sound that certain way. I don't think he does (If I did I wouldn't have posted it) but I would appreciate any critque or suggestions. Just let me know.

To everyone. REMEMBER ALCOHOL INDUCED.

REALLY prepare for some REAL OOCness...MUHAHAHA

_Let's Never Mention This Night Again_

_The first ten blocks are quiet, just the slight disgruntled mumbling from Reno every now and then. The night is cold, and my breath frosts up in front of my face with each anger fueled huff. _

_I am so __**pissed**__. They hired a stripper! For Tifa! Tifa's not that kind of girl!_

_I do not need these extra insecurities!_

_GAH!_

_Reno glances at me sourly. "You better hand that fucking bottle over Strife. You aren't hogging it all."_

_I wobble, trying to process what he's saying. Oh, the whisky bottle I took from the bar. I narrow my eyes, and then tip the bottle up to my lips and take a healthy gulp. Reno fumes._

_He stops, and points at me. I stop too, looking at him._

"_Listen. If I've got to walk five fucking miles with you I'm gonna be drunk."_

"_You're already drunk."_

"_Well, not drunk enough. Hand the bottle over!"_

"_Get your own."_

"_I would have my own if we were back at the bar! At __**your **__bachelor party! I'm not taking another step until you give me that bottle! Or get me my own!" Reno crosses his arms and glares at me._

_He's just like Yuffie. _

_I shrug, turning around and walk back towards the bar, past him._

"_Wait. You're going to go get me my own?" His jaw drops._

_I pause, turning to look at him. "Sure buddy– Of course I'm not going to get you your own!" I take a page from Yuffie's book them and kick him in the chest. _

_He stumbles backward. "Ow! Shit man!"_

"_Blame your girlfriend." I start walking back towards Seventh Heaven._

"_You asshole!" _

_I stop again, looking back at him. "This is your fault. You should've never hired me a stripper, or given Yuffie the idea of getting Tifa one! So the more time you spend whining about it the longer it'll take us to get to the bar. So move it." I face forward starting to walk._

_I hear a scrapping noise behind me, and I glance over my shoulder in time to see Reno picking up a empty wire trash can off the sidewalk. He holds it over his head menacingly._

"_Wait–_

_Too late._

"_Screw you!"_

_Reno chucks the trash can at my head and I duck. It clatters against the brick wall behind me._

_I straighten, glaring at him. "What's wrong with you?"_

_Reno's eyes go wide. "What's wrong with me?! You're the crazy one! You complain about strippers and you kicked me in the chest– hey...hey what are you doing?" Reno eyes me warily as I bend over._

_I pick up a hefty brick beside of the wall, and I glare at him._

"_You wouldn't...even you wouldn't, right? Strife, come on man. I threw a trash can! You could rip that thing in half with your teeth! Strife! Calm down! Put the brick down! I'm sorry! I'll fix the stripper thing, ok?! CLOUD!"_

_I chuck the brick at his head, and it really doesn't even come close to him considering my current state of inebriation. Still, he ducks and quivers and the brick sails past him gracefully, and I have the beginnings of a chuckle forming in my throat at his fear of my brick throwing._

_That's when we hear the glass shatter._

_We both look towards the sound of the glass, and we spot the jewelry store across the street with a shattered window. Oops._

_Reno looks back at me, and I look at him._

_I bolt._

_Reno bolts in the other direction. It takes him about three seconds to figure it out. I hear him skid to a halt behind me._

"_Shit! Wait up!"_

"_Run faster!" I hiss over my shoulder. I hear him catching up, and we cover seven blocks before hear sirens coming. _

_Up ahead I can see blue and red lights bouncing off the buildings. Reno reaches out, grabbing my arm and tugs to the left at the next block. We run as fast as we can up the next street, before heading towards the bar once again. The sirens fade past us but we still run for several more blocks._

_Unfortunately my inebriation kicked in then (I'm lucky it didn't earlier). I see the crack in the sidewalk. I __**see **__it but I can't successfully execute the proper maneuvers around it._

_That's part of the problem when it comes to being drunk. You can __**see **__things but you can't do anything about them._

_My toe catches in the crack, and I topple forward, flipping head over heels before Reno plows into me. He curses as we roll across the sidewalk, and finally we grind to a stop._

_I sigh as I lay there. "Ow."_

_Then something moves beneath me. "Get off you cow!" Reno punches me in the middle of my back._

_I wince, rolling off of him to hold my spine. "Bastard!"_

_Reno takes a deep breath, sitting up and glares at me for the umpteenth time tonight. "How much do you freaking weigh? Damn! You're shorter than me and you weigh like a billion pounds! What does Tifa feed you?!"_

"_Hey. I am not shorter than you."_

"_Bullshit. So you don't care you're fat? You should work on that– ow!"_

_I kick his knee, and I stand slowly. _

_Reno groans, standing slow. "There's no way in hell you're blaming me for that."_

_I don't glance at him as I try to figure out where we are. "You're right. You're just an accomplis."_

"_Gah! That's bullshit! I didn't have anything to with that!"_

"_You threw a trash can at me."_

"_So?! It's not my fault your brick happened to trash someone's window!"_

"_You ducked. It missed its intended target." I look at him over my shoulder._

"_What?! That was the worst throw I've ever seen! It wouldn't have hit me anyways."_

"_How would you know? You were too busy cowering with fear to tell where it was."_

_His jaw drops and I face forward again. "Come on." I take another healthy swallow of the whisky. "We've got less than four miles. If we hurry we can be there in– Agh! Get off!"_

_Reno jumps on my back, hitting me. He's like a rabid monkey!_

_I punch him in his side and he yells, his grip around my neck loosening. I lean forward once to get momentum, rocking back on my heels and flinging him over my shoulder. Tifa did that to me once. It was hot then. I like a woman in control._

_Frick! He's ruining my sexy Tifa memories! I'll KILL him!"_

_Reno with his annoying Turk training bounces back up onto his feet quickly, even if it is a bit more messier than normal. Well, maybe not. Reno probably drinks on the job._

_We glare at each other._

_He points at the bottle. "Give me that fucking whisky or I'll be forced to extreme measures. I never knew you could be so annoying. And here I thought you sober was bad. Shit."_

_I point at him. "Listen. All I want is to make sure that you're stupidity doesn't lead to Tifa leaving me."_

"_Tifa isn't going to leave you because of a stripper!"_

"_I don't care. I'm not happy. And I'm getting married, so I should be happy!"_

"_No. You should be afraid."_

"_Hey. Just because you're jealous I'm marrying a great woman, and you're stuck with evil klepto psychotic ninja chick doesn't mean you should ruin my marriage!"_

"_**What**__?! Trust me pal... I'll never be jealous of you! And you aren't even married yet!"_

"_I __**will **__be! And I'm sure you'll mess it up for me then!" Inner Cloud is having a blast today...all the stuff that I'd normally just scream in my head is finding its way out of my mouth. Nice._

_Reno nods his head, holding his fists up. "Oh you better believe it. It'll be the best day of my fucking life!"_

"_Agh!"_

"_Gah!"_

_We go after each other at the same time. I swing with the whisky bottle and he ducks, elbowing me in the chest. We weave back and forth, probably looking like quite the spectacle as I kick Reno in the stomach. He rears back, and then comes forward, and head buts me in the chest. I stumble back, trying to kick his feet out from underneath him, but end up kneeing him in the face instead._

_It's a little unfair since I am keeping the whisky from him. I really don't care about it that much I just don't want him to have it. This asshole brings out the worst in me. _

_So with my inebriation and handicap, Reno manages to get his arm around the back of my neck, and we fold over as he punches me in the gut. Something occurs to me in this moment._

"_Wait! Wait hang on!"_

"_What?! Just cos you're losing now doesn't mean you can call a timeout!" He doesn't let me go, but he at least stops hitting me._

_My voice is muffled since I'm still bent over staring at the ground. I'm practically talking into my chest. "I'll give you some whisky...how about that?"_

_Reno huffs, releasing me and pushing me backwards. "We start off like that once this shitty time out is over."_

_I lean over my knees, trying to catch my breath. "That's fine. Just... just don't punch me in the face."_

"_**What**__?!"_

_I straighten. "Don't...punch me in the face."_

"_Why?! You already kicked me in the face!" _

_I glance up, noticing that he has a little bit of blood dripping out of his nostrils. Oh well. He deserved it._

"_Because you idiot I'm getting married in less than a week and the last thing I need is a broken nose or a black eye!"_

"_Ha!" Reno laughs. "You think I care about that?"_

"_Honestly you should! Do you think fifteen years from now when I'm showing my kids the photo album from our wedding I want them to see me with a crooked nose and a black eye? Not to mention the fact that Tifa will __**kill **__me if I come back with a new bruise or scar on my face right before our wedding. And then Yuffie will kill you because you're the reason why my face was ruined and that would be the reason that ruined Tifa's wedding."_

_Reno's face contorts as he struggles. He sputters before finally forcing out a clear word. "Fine!" He points at me then. "But it's only because Yuffie scares the shit out of me and I really don't feel like pissing her off! It's not cause I care about you or your stupid wedding!"_

"_Good. Cause I don't want you to care."_

"_Good! Now give me that whisky."_

"_Come and get it."_

"_Asshole!"_

_Reno charges at me again but this time I get my arm around his neck, and I pummel him with the whisky bottle. _

"_Hey!" A voice from the outside world is yelling at us._

"_Stay out of this dude!" Reno yells between punches. "I'm fine! I got this under control! I don't need your help!"_

"_Sir! Release...the other sir and put the whisky bottle down!"_

_Reno and I both look up at the same time, Reno still yelling. "Dude! Stay out of it! I've–oh... hello officer."_

_I stop punching Reno, and we stand there hunched over while the cop stares at us. He's got to be new...he looks quite a few years younger than me even though he's taller than both me and Reno by a good few inches. _

"_Officer...we're actually really good friends. We're just...messing around."_

_I take this as the cue to release Reno, and we both straighten. I can already hear Tifa's anger as she bails us out of jail._

_Shit shit shit shit_

_The cop eyes us warily. "Uh huh...you two wouldn't know anything about a break in at a jewelry store about a mile away, would ya?"_

_Are you kidding me?!_

"_Uh...no..."_

_Then Reno opens his big mouth. "Yeah, actually we do!"_

_He's betraying me!_

"_We saw these guys in masks doing it! They ran that way!"_

_The cop stares at us. "Right."_

"_Hey! Edwards! Ya find someone!" A flashlight is coming up the street._

_The cop's head turns_.

_Reno grabs my arm._

_And we run._

"_H-hey!" We don't look back, just keep running._

_I guess if we were thinking sober we could've just told them that we associated with Rufus ShinRa...that might have gotten him off our backs._

_Or not._

_We tear down an alley, the cop's feet pounding on the ground behind us._

"_Shit! Gotta be a rookie if he can keep up with us!" Reno huffs, as we run blindly across a street and into another alley. The cop is still on our tails._

"_Is he still back there?" Reno turns his head around to look behind us._

_I do the same. "I think we can out run him–_

_BAM!_

_OOOOOOoooooooooow! FUCK!_

_Reno and I bounce off the brick wall like rag dolls, and hit the ground hard. We groan, coughing._

_I wince, looking at him. "Why didn't you say there was a wall?"_

_Reno holds his head in his hands. "Shut up."_

_I roll onto my knees, standing wobbly._

_At least the bottle didn't break. I hand it over to Reno and he takes a quick swig as the cop comes to a stop in front of us, huffing, pointing his gun at us. Yeah, that makes me feel safe._

"_You resisted arrest!"_

"_No shit." Reno stands, leaning against the wall. "Are you a rookie?"_

"_Hell yes I am, and I'm going to get a good first bust. Jewelry robbers."_

_Crap. "It's not that." I hold up my hand. "Really..."_

"_Then what is it, huh?" He's cocky. We have to get out of this but it's looking doubtful._

"_I'm getting married... you can't arrest me."_

"_Oh I can't? If you're getting married then why run from the cops, huh?"_

"_Because it's his bachelor's party!" Reno yells._

"_And I'm __**drunk**__." Note the whisky bottle, dude. I don't normally act this way. If I did I doubt Tifa would marry me._

"_Come on dude...it's like...the eve of his wedding and you're going to arrest us? Why would a guy getting married be out throwing bricks at windows?"_

"_A HA! How'd you know it was a brick?"_

_I glare at Reno. _

"_I bet you needed a ring then, to marry your fiancé."_

_I shake my head. "No. I've got it here in my pocket." I reach for my pocket._

"_Don't move scumbag!" The guy points the gun at me._

_Great. "I didn't steal it. I promise. I bought it."_

"_Yeah, dude I was there," Reno adds. _

"_Yeah...when you stole it out of that jewelry store!"_

_Reno rolls his eyes, and holds his arms out. "Dude, just cuff me already. I'm tired of this bullshit, seriously. If you knew who I was you wouldn't be doing this."_

"_I have to wait on my partner...so we'll just wait. And no one is above the law."_

_Reno rolls his eyes again._

"_Edwards! Ya got 'em?" Down the alley I can see a large figure walking. Great. I'm going to jail on the night of my bachelor party. Tifa is going to slaughter me! She'll probably just chuck her engagement ring through the bars of my jail cell, and not even bail me out._

_Why me?_

"_Don't turn your head this time, rookie!"_

_Then Edwards does the unthinkable. He turns his head to scream angry at his partner. "I've __**got **__them!"_

_Reno reacts faster than I do. I still am in shock we get a second chance. Reno kicks the gun out of Edwards' hands, and Edwards' head snaps back towards up, his mouth falling open._

_Too bad we're already over the wall. Reno does his crazy monkey wall climbing thing, and I kick off one wall, and off the opposite to vault myself over the obstacle. _

_I flip, and land as Reno yells over the wall. _

"_Ya wouldn't have caught us anyways, asshole!"_

"_How did they get over the wall?!"_

_Reno glances me. "How the fuck do you manage to vault a brick wall without a problem but you can't run up a sidewalk?"_

_I shrug. "Bad luck?"_

"_Maybe good."_

"_They're going around! Go around! They got away!"_

_Reno grins, and we start running up the alley, and out onto the street again._

_We run for blocks, and I lose count. When the air is silent we finally slow to a stop with out tripping or flipping over each other._

_Then I crack into laughter, and Reno starts laughing too._

"_I...I can't believe... we got away! Wooo!" _

_I punch Reno's shoulder. "Shut up! They're still lookin for the robbers!"_

_Reno laughs, taking a large gulp of whisky and passing the bottle. There's still at least three fourths left. _

_I glance at the nearest road sign. "We got about three miles left, maybe two and a half."_

_Reno looks at the bottle. _

"_It'll do. Good thing we're going to another bar." _

_xxx_

_I can't believe we made it to our street. We should be dead. There's no way a human can consume as much alcohol as we have and still be alive let alone walking!_

_Well, if you can call this walking._

_My mind is too warped to care that Reno and I have are arms thrown around each other so we can walk up the sidewalk. We lean off each other, and Reno swings the nearly empty bottle in his hand. It's been over an hour since we escaped incarceration._

_I guess alcohol takes away the annoyingness eventually._

_I don't think that's a real worddddd... oh well._

_We stumble up to the bar, and I can see light shining through the window. I press my nose against the glass, and Reno stumbles beside me._

_STRIPPER! AGH! NOW I remember why I hate him! The stripper is dancing in the middle of the room, unbuttoning his shirt. I see an assortment of women laughing and blushing as a thumping beat comes through the window._

_Even worse...it's a stripper __**cop**__. Insult to injury._

_Dude... dude.._

_We stumble back away from the window, and I grab the bottle._

"_I'm goin... in there...and kicking that guy's ass. He's prolly gay...right?"_

_Reno snorts. "No. Prolly not... but there's...no way."_

"_No way what?"_

"_That...you'll beat him up! He's bigger than you are."_

"_So? No care... me... I don't... effin care. His ass is goin down."_

_Reno grins. He puts his finger up against my head like a gun. "Nope... you'll be dead... bang."_

"_Don't touch me." I shake his finger off my head._

_It makes me dizzy... er._

"_HA! Touch you?! I'm the only reason you're standing!"_

"_Bull shit." I push off of him, wobbling._

_I take the last swallow of the whisky, and point at the window. "You're...going down." I take a step closer to the window, standing just beneath it.._

_And then the sidewalk starts spinning._

_And I go down._

_Reno busts into laughter... he bends in the middle, pointing at me and laughing, stepping backwards._

_And then he falls._

_But his laughter doesn't stop, and that makes me laugh._

_Then the music gets louder, and I look up. There's a shadow in the window, leaning out over me._

"_C...Cloud?"_

"_Tifa?"_

_The shadow leans forward, and the street lamp hits her face. "Cloud?"_

"_Tifa?"_

_Then a radiant alcohol induced smile breaks on her face like the sunrise. "Cloud!"_

"_Tifa."_

"_For fuck's sake! Shit! It's Cloud! You're Tifa! The end!"_

_Tifa leans farther out the window. "What are you doing here... Reno? Why are...did you __**walk **__here?"_

"_Tifa who is it?" I hear Yuffie's voice from the window._

_Tifa turns violently. "It's Cloud! I gotta say hey! HANG ON."_

_Then Tifa puts a knee on the window sill. I think she's climbing out the window. I can almost see up her dress. Score. _

_Wait._

_She is. Climbing out the window that is._

_No. Wait._

_She's falling._

_Tifa grip on the window falters, and I see her eyes go wide as she loses her balance._

_No. Not my stomach._

_OW. My stomach._

_Tifa lands on me, her elbow driving deep in my stomach which is still sore from where Reno was punching me._

_Why was he punching me again?_

_Tifa giggles, coming into my face. "Hey, Cloud...how's your party?"_

"_Psychotic."_

"_Why are you here?"_

"_No...strippers. Leave. Tell him. To leave." It's getting hard to form sentences._

"_Who, Ted?"_

"_No strippers." _

_Reno punches the air. "Mission complete! About time!"_

_Another voice drifts out the window. "Wait... wait a second. Ms. Lockhart are you ok?" Another body leans out the window._

_Reno screams. "Shit! Run Cloud it's Edwards!"_

"_**Edwards**__?" I ask, and it is._

_It's the rookie._

_STRIPPING FOR MY FINACE!_

"_Oh...you really are getting married. Did he steal your ring?"_

_Tifa gasps. "Of course not! Right?"_

"_I didn't steal it..."_

"_So don't arrest them Ted." Tifa looks up at him. I don't like the fact that she knows him by his first name._

"_So you strip too?" Reno asks._

_Ted Edwards shrugs. "Uniform works for both. You just better be glad I'm off duty now."_

"_This is the greatest night ever!" Reno whoops._

"_Reno!" I look up, spotting Yuffie pushing stripper cop out of the way. "You shouldn't be here!"_

"_Shit! This is the worst night ever!" Reno starts trying to crawl away from the window, but Yuffie jumps out of it, gratefully missing me and Tifa._ _Yuffie catches him, sitting on his chest. "What are you doing?!"_

"_Cloud didn't want a stripper!"_

"_Well, __**duh**__. That's why we were going to keep it a secret!"_

_I let my head drop back onto the cement. A light turns on in a window in the building next door. I glance at Tifa._

"_I think we woke the neighbors."_

_Tifa snuggles up against my chest. "Who cares? They're all biddies anyways."_

"_Wow...you really are drunk."_

"_So are you! Clod...Clow...Cloud...I love you."_

_I go to answer, but she starts snoring. I glance at Reno, and Yuffie is curled up on him as well._

_Short lived anger._

_Must have drained her energy._

_Reno looks at me._

"_Let's never mention this night again."_

"_Agreed."_

**A/N: **This actually comes from an original story I'm writing... I really REALLY REALLY hate romantic comedies now (they're so cookie cutter it's sickening) and I was going for a more original feel. Obviously there's some stuff I left out from that story...the whole story focuses on memories, and these two guys who really don't like each other but get into quite a lot of trouble trying to get the fiance to not see the stripper. Do you think it's a good idea? I hope so.

ANYWAYS remember...mass amounts of alcohol produced such an outspoken Cloud... We won't see him again in this story...I also kind of wanted to show that even though Cloud and Reno HATE each other, they can reach a mutual understanding after consuming unholy amounts of alcohol. I'm sure they'll hate each other when they're sober XD The reason they fight over the whisky? Reno wants it because he's pissed and wants to drown that and Cloud just wants it to keep Reno from having it so he can piss him off. Boys will be boys

The cop thing? I had to make a stab at cops. Don't get me wrong... I respect them adn everything, but my sister is becoming a cop (LOLOLOLOL) and I had to make a joke about it... HEHEHEHEHE

QUICK UPDATE! ENJOY!

Also there's a minor Scrubs reference...hehe

OMG I just realized the title sounds like Reno/Cloud had a slash night! LOLOLOL!! WRONG SO WRONG! AGH! I just mentally blinded myself with bad images.


	72. Road Trip

_Road Trip_

_This is no fun._

_At all._

_Zilch. None. Zero. It's actually negative, if that's even possible._

"_Cloud. Hey, Cloud."_

_I glance up, spotting Barret. When was the last time he called me Cloud? What happened to asshole, or bastard, or Spike? Or even the dreaded chocobo references._

"_What?" I'm suspicious. I'm always suspicious. I bet he's going to try and have a serious talk with me about being a man, and being responsible, cuz that's what Barret does...or tries to, at least. He walks around as surrogate father even though technically the only one who has reproduced in these parts is Cid._

_Which is probably the worst candidate out of all of us._ _Wait, let me actually think this through. I mean, we all know Cid's kid is going to be messed up...but Yuffie as a parent? Vincent? It's not so much that I think Vincent is incapable, I just think he lacks the proper...well, feelings to be a parent. I think he would be awkward._

_Awkward._

_As in the silence that Barret is stretching out._

_I forgot he was there._

"_What?" I ask, a little more exasperated._

"_Oh...uh, let's go get a drink, hey? Celebratory one." I don't think that's a word._

_But I won't tell him._

"_Sure." I shrug. I stand, and we leave the hotel room._

_After the bachelor party, me and Tifa passed out on our bed. Ted Edwards, cop by day, stripper by night, kept the ladies entertained. Yuffie got her second wind, and Reno hooted and hollered with the best of those horny ladies,_ _and Tifa and I went upstairs, and just laid there. Partly because I missed her, and partly because the room was spinning too much to really move, and by then my lips were pretty much liquid mush from all the alcohol. Tifa talked, though...she talks a lot when she's drunk._

_And I realized, laying there, that I didn't think it was Ted Edwards that bothered me so much...I think it was just everything, all my priorities were getting shoved around and rearranged. It was like what Tifa said that night...how after we got to Cosmo Canyon, we wouldn't really be able to see each other. We haven't really had that much time together lately, anyway. There was that night, with the stars and the field, but reality has a cruel way of coming back._

_And I haven't seen Tifa since we left that morning for here, for Cosmo Canyon. I see her fleetingly, across the room beside Yuffie who is usually scolding hotel staff for screwing the decorations up or some other mess._

_The elevator dings as we hit the lobby floor. Wow, I'm really out of it. My wedding is coming up. I'm getting married. Should I be scared? Am I scared? I feel kind of numb, like all of this isn't real._

'_Shape up, bud.'_

_I sigh; I don't even have the heart to talk to them._

'_I don't like being ignored, jackass.'_

_Shut up. Better?_

'_Weak. Lame. I shower you with insults. BLEH!'_

"_Shit!" I look up in time to see Barret's massive forearm collide with my chest. He knocks me behind a potted tree, and I glare at him._

_Dude. Really?_

"_Just...hang on."_

_I peer through the plastic leaves as Barret walks around the tree, and towards the bar. _

"_Yuffie!"_

_Oh, wow. How nice. He was hiding me from psycho. _

"_Hey, where's Cloud?"_

"_I think he's taking a nap. Oh, I saw one of the hotel people taking down that curtain you had put up in–_

"_Son of a bitch! Why don't these people listen to me?! It's not like we haven't __**paid **__them enough. GET OUT OF THE WAY!"_

_Yuffie storms past Barret, and through the main doors. I walk out, catching up with Barret, and we head into the bar._

_The hotel at Cosmo Canyon is pretty fancy now; people like to travel here because it is really a beautiful place. That's why Tifa wanted it here, the sunset on the desert. It'll get cool once the sun goes down, but we're having the reception in the hotel._

_I slide onto a seat at the bar, and Barret orders us something._

"_Listen."_

_Here it comes. I knew it._

"_Sure you've known Tifa longer than I have...hell, you've known her longer than anyone has, but that doesn't give you the right to take her for granted or do any of that other stupid shit you used to do."_

"_I appreciate your faith."_

_Barret sighs. "I'm only sayin this cos she's my girl. You know, she asked me to give her away."_

_I nod my head. "Wouldn't have it any other way."_

"_Man what's with you?" I actually look at him. "You're like death walking. Man up, you're getting married. The fun hasn't even started."_

"_You make it sound like it's that bad."_

_Barret chuckles. "Consider it an inside joke. You're not really happy if you can't complain about it. I know that makes no sense, but there was shit my wife used to do that would just piss me off, and get under my skin." He gets this look in his eyes, and I feel guilty, making him step back in that time and place. "She knew exactly which buttons to press, and exactly how to push me to my limits. But I loved her, because I'd get mad, I'd get so angry, but, it was worth it. Because I could do the same back to her...and ya got to have bad with good. Cid will tell you it's all bad, but that's just Cid being Cid. He's got to bitch and complain about nothing. He really loves it. You can tell."_

_I nod my head. "Ok."_

_Then Barret grins evilly. "So. You ain't ready to be married until you __**do **__know exactly what it is that drives Tifa crazy. What is it?"_

_I feel my spirits lift slightly. "Well...she gets really mad at me when I'm doing bills or planning my routes, and I'll click my pen. Her hair stands on end, and she always walks over and grabs my pen, and throws it at the wall. She gets really mad when I interrupt her reading. She always says, 'Cloud. This is my one thing. Give it to me. Go away.' Or if I talk during a movie, because I don't normally, I just do it with her, because her face turns red, and she normally punches me. Though that kind of hurts."_

_Barret chuckles. "Whenever she first moved in, I never put away laundry. It just sort of stayed in a constant cycle of dirty, to clean, in the laundry room. She changed that, but she'd get so mad if I didn't put my clothes up."_

_I smirk. "I'll file that for later use."_

"_If you do that I'll punch you so hard your face will fall off."_

_I turn sharply, nearly losing my balance on the stool. "Tifa."_

_Tifa stands with her hands planted on her hips, serious. But then she breaks into a good natured smile._

"_You know what drives him crazy? Smudge Fenrir."_

_I narrow my eyes, but she looks at Barret. "I finally got away from Yuffie. She was yelling about some curtain, and I told her I had to go to the bathroom."_

_Wait..._

"_I was wondering what took you so long. I had to have a serious talk with him." Barret thrusts his thumb at me. "It was getting old real fast."_

_Geez, thanks buddy._

"_Thanks Barret." Tifa reaches out, grabbing my hand and pulls me off the stool._

_We walk out of the hotel, moseying up the streets. She intertwines her fingers with mine, and I feel my whole body just relax. I've been missing this, us. Just us. _

_She leans her head on my shoulder, and I can tell she has too. "So, I don't know how much time we have before Yuffie goes psycho and finds us. She has this uncanny ability of finding me when I try to grab a moment of peace. I think she put a tracker on me."_

"_I wouldn't put it past her."_

_She grins, squeezing my arm, and we lapse into silence. There's something different about this silence, though. Granted, I have a lot of silences, but Tifa can feel it, the tension stretched in the air._

_She pulls on my arm to get me to stop. "What is it? What's wrong?"_

_And then I see it flash behind her eyes, even though she knows there's no way in hell I'd do that to her, and even though she believes in me, I see it. The faintest doubt spring up there. I can't blame her, and I'm surprised I haven't seen this look more. I deserve doubt to be thrust in my face at every turn. _

_She looks down, immediately shamed. She shouldn't be._

_I tilt her face up. "It's fine." Or it will be. I'm just in a funk. A spoof. _

_A tizz. I've got an itch that I just can't scratch._

_...my brain is avoiding the problem._

_I don't even know what the problem is._

_She squeezes my hand. "We'll figure it out."_

_I know we will, but I'm sort of worried that I won't be able to in time, or here. Or...something. I have this old throb in my legs, something that I had grown used to._

_I've changed. I'm not going to lie, but I am still me. I still sometimes choice the less honorable option of fight or flight, and not in an actual physical fight. I have this automatic reaction to dive for an escape, to avoid the problem completely until it sorts itself out, or until I can handle the problem or someone else fixes it. I don't think anyone else can fix this. I think I'm the only one who can. I don't think Tifa can...she can help, but only I can fix this. I need to stop hesitating. I need to do something. I know what the problem is. I know what I need to do now._

_Some things just haunt you._

_I turn to Tifa suddenly. "Will you come with me?"_

"_Of course." Then she shakes her head. "Wait. What? Where?"_

_It almost lifts my spirit, seeing her sudden answer even before she knows what she's said._

"_Out. Of here."_

"_Where? How long?"_

_I shrug. "We'll be back in time for the wedding."_

"_But that's the thing, Cloud. The wedding. There's so much to do! We're getting married in three days. If we ran off now every one would freak out! Yuffie will have a heart attack and make Reno get the helicopter after us!"_

_I stare at her, feeling something tug at me again. I can learn to handle my itch. I can handle this problem._

_I hope._

_And she sees my eyes, and she understands suddenly. "Well, we better leave now if we want to make it back soon."_

"_Right." _

_I steer her towards the parking deck. _

_As I she climbs on Fenrir, I turn around to hand her goggles to her, and she smiles, real and big, and in such an unburdened way I can't believe, because we are getting married in three days, and we are leaving this city. We're going on a road trip, and she should not be this calm. She should be freaking out._

_But I also see something else. She's coming to help me, and I know she's been helping me because the old me wouldn't have asked her to come with me. The old me wouldn't have even told her I was leaving, three days till marriage regardless._

_But we are leaving._

_And here we go._

_And hopefully Tifa's good luck will balance out my terrible luck, and we'll get back in time for the wedding._

_Our wedding._

_I'm crazy._

**A/N: **Eh? What's this? Where are they going?! I DONT KNOW. Oh wait. Yes I do. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews last chapter...they really made me laugh! I'm so tired...finals...why? WHY?! College shouldn't be graded...it should just be. Course, college shouldn't be ridiculously expensive, and text books should be own by the college like in high school, but I guess that won't be happening. Sigh. I'm poor...boo college.


	73. Runaway Bride and Groom?

_Runaway Bride...and Groom?_

_The wind in my hair is a reassuring feeling, one I've missed. This whole situation, I've missed it. Don't get me wrong, when I used to go out on these bouts of rebellion it was for all the wrong reasons...geostigma, and guilt...death. It still hangs over me, sort of lurking on the edge, ready to destroy what little peace and happiness we've built._

_But, as it is, this feeling, of complete freedom. Driving without end, seemingly without a destination._

_Well, I have a destination, and if we weren't in such a time crunch (WEDDING SHIT) then I would be taking the lazy, scenic route. _

_But even though I love the freedom, the freedom of no responsibilities, the freedom of making choices for yourself, there is a fear with that...a fear that this sort of freedom will allow me to shirk my responsibilities...like I've done in the past. A fear that I'll lose myself in running from the things that make me who I am._

_And the thing that holds back these fears, and sort of makes this freedom not so wild and unpredictable, or irresponsible is the arms wrapped around my waist, and the dosing head that keeps bouncing on my back._

_Tifa._

_And it's a much more potent sort of comfort with her actually __**here**__, with me while I run. But it's only a quick run._

_And I also know that I wouldn't be able to face this alone. I didn't last time, but I wasn't fully myself then...I wasn't aware of the repercussions that this place was._

_Fenrir rumbles to a stop as we coast up the abandoned street. Tifa mumbles something incoherent, and I allow myself a small smirk before turning my eyes over the grim surroundings._

_I remember this town with life. I remember it with children, children that albeit didn't like me, but children all the same that ran around playing, and laughing. Children that would've been teenagers that burned to death in this very spot, slain by my own hero._

_No. Not my hero. Not anymore._

_Tifa sighs against my back, still unconscious. _

_I didn't want to face this alone, and Tifa is asleep...but even with her asleep I'm still comforted, because I know she understands, and she's the one person __**alive **__that understands this. That really does._

_The worst part is that they rebuilt it._

_The worst part is that I can see the ghosts of the people that used to live here, carrying out their daily lives as if they'd never died. I can see housewives sweeping off their steps, and I can see men moving about, doing their daily work. But...at the same time, I can see the ghost of flames dancing along the rooftops, and down the walls. I can see the blood that stained the bricks that aren't there anymore. I can see it all as if it just happened a moment ago._

_Years ago._

_Tifa's hand laces with mine, her fingers twisting down between my own. Her nose presses into my back, and she sighs. She knows why I am here. She probably guessed why we came here._

"_You know," she says, softly, as to not disturb the solemn air. "Your mother would be so proud of you."_

_I restrain a wince. I'm avoiding looking at my own house, and hers. Would my mother be proud of me? I didn't save her. I didn't save this town._

_I didn't save a lot of people. Not Zack. Not Aeris._

'_Haven't we already been through this?' _

_I won't ever change. I'm dealing with my guilt each day at a time. There isn't a day that doesn't pass that I don't think about __**the **__past. And I know the same is for Tifa, because every now and then while she's at the bar, or cooking supper some sort of haunted look passes over her features. _

_I know I've been forgiven. I know I have forgiven myself, but I'm not done forgiving myself. Each day I live is a reminder that it is another day that they didn't live, and each day I deal with this guilt is the only way I'll be able to forgive myself in the end. At the End. When I join them._

_I won't dwell on it like I used to, but that won't keep me from thinking about it, or feeling guilty. You can't just wash away years of guilt. It takes time. And it takes help._

_I squeeze Tifa's fingers._

"_I needed this too, you know?" I nod my head, and she continues. "When I was growing up here, I didn't know if I'd ever get married... all the boys here, well, they were just...immature. I took for granted that my father would give me away at my wedding, or see his grandchildren._ _It is amazing how much I love Marlene, like my own daughter, and Denzel, like my own son, and he has never met them...never will meet them...never even knew of their existence."_

_She sighs heavily, squeezing her other arm tightly around my waist, and pressing her face into my back. "It's something I have to come to terms with, and I don't think I would've been able to if you hadn't brought me here."_

_I squeeze her hand again. I think she knows what I'm feeling, it's just... though I needed to see this, and feel this, to remind me what I have lost, and more importantly, what I have gained, I just can't voice it. And maybe one day I will, when I truly have forgiven myself, and don't hang the blame over me so much._

_Right now I'm content to listen to Tifa._

"_You know," Tifa says softly. "I know you needed help. And I'm glad you asked me for it, the help to do this, to come here and face your fears. But I think you brought me here for more than just my help. You know, I needed your help too...facing this. Thank you."_

_I sigh, and she squeezes my hand._

_We're silent for a time. Silence says more than words sometimes._

_Xxx_

_The ride back towards Cosmo Canyon is silent, solemn, at first. The first day we spent on the road to Nibelhiem, and we slept in an inn at the base of the mountain that night. We left a little late this morning, because we do have plenty of time to get back to Cosmo Canyon._

_Tifa is sleeping on my back, but I have this inkling. One last itch. One last turn and then we can go get married._

_Nibelhiem wasn't the only unfinished business._

_I smirk, hooking left onto another highway._

_Xxx_

_The loud roars and bright lights is what wakes Tifa._

"_Oh my God. Oh my God! Cloud! We don't have time for this!" Tifa exclaims, but her smile betrays her._

_I hold my hand back to her, and she climbs off. We always have time for this._

_Evening is set well in, and I know it's going to be a long night's drive full of illegal speed limits. But it'll be worth it._ _I almost feel like at this point we're taking our honeymoon first, wedding last._

_Tifa skips through the entrance to the Gold Saucer, looking like a little kid. It's a pretty busy night, and Tifa's first stop is for some cotton candy. As Tifa stands at the vendor, my gil clutched in her hand, I slip my phone out of my pocket. I had turned it off so no one would interrupt our adventure. But...it might be useful to know what we're getting ourselves into once we actually arrive back at the hotel._

_I turn it on, and it takes a moment, a longer moment than usual, to gather itself._

_Then the missed calls pop up._

_Seventy three missed calls._

_Twenty six voice mails._

_Thirty three text messages._

_And fifteen emails._

_Oh yes. This looks grand._

_I don't even look at the missed calls. I know sixty percent of them will be from Yuffie, and probably thirty percent will be from Barret._ _9.99 percent will probably be from all the other assorted guests, hotel managers, wedding planner, Cecil, etc. etc. The .01 percent will be Vincent's. If we're that lucky._

"_You have...twenty six...new voice mails. Number one ...yesterday...at ...12:57 P.M."_

_Beep!_

"_Hey! Cloud! It's me, Yuffie...so Barret totally blew me off. Do you know where Tifa is? Call me! Now! Thanks!"_

_Delete._

"_Message Two....yesterday...at 1:35 P.M."_

_Beep!_

"_Cloud! Oh my gawd! It's Yuffie. Call me! NOW." _

_I'll deleted that one._

_Beep!_

_2:45 P.M. "Cloud I swear–_

_Delete._

_3:00 P.M. "Cloud! Fenrir is __**gone**__. I think someone stole it! It's me, Yuffie! I know the signs of a thief. Call me, ASAP."_

_3:43 P.M. "...you're gone....Fenrir's gone...."_

_3:57 P.M. "OH MY GAWD Cloud I __**know **__you did not just run away! I know you didn't leave Tifa at the altar. Call me the fuck back!"_

_4:03 P.M. "Cloud! Seriously! You can't do this! Come back! I'll keep leaving voice mails until you come back!"_

_4:15 P.M. "Yo Spike, it's Barret. Yuffie seems to think you've run out on Tifa, so you might want to give her a call back, cos I know that's not true after the talk we just had. Just call me back, and if you see Tifa, I'm pretty sure you were the last one with her– "OH MY GOD! Are you talking to Cloud?! Give me the effing phone! Give it to me now! Cloud it's Yuffie! Cloud I swear if you're ignoring my calls I'll castrate you! Cloud–_

_4:16 P.M. "– I swear to all things holy Cloud I'm going to kick your ass in! I'm going to destroy your face so bad no one will be able to tell if they're look at your face or your ass! Oh my gawd! I can't believe you're doing this to __**me, **__after all the hard work I've put into this wedding! And Tifa! Tifa!– "Yuffie we can't find Tifa– "Ehmahgawd Cloud Tifa's been kidnaped I'll call you back!"_

_4:20 P.M. "You took her, didn't you Cloud?"_

_4:25 P.M. "Ok...I can live with that Cloud, if you and the lovely bride need some alone time, that's fine. That's fine. I can do that. I'll be calm. I'll get __**your **__wedding together, and we wait for your return. Which will be on time. For the rehearsal dinner. Tomorrow, Cloud. At six, Cloud. Cloud, be there."_

_Today 3:55 P.M. "Cloud, it's me Yuffie...it's getting awfully close to the rehearsal dinner...awfully close, and we haven't heard from you. I'm just a little concerned. If you aren't in a ditch somewhere bleeding then all other excuses are meaningless. This better be life and death Cloud. __**Life **__and __**death,**__ Cloud."_

_5:55 P.M. "CLOUD! They've taken my phone! They're taking it! But I'll get– lemme go! Get __**away**__! Shut up Vincent! No one asked you! Cloud–Cloud, seriously if you don't call me back I'm going to keep calling until your ears __**bleed**__. Until they __**bleed **__Cloud. Blood will be coming out of your ears– hey! Hey! I'm not done– I'm not– fin–ished! Stop it! Vin–Vincent! OW ! Your shoes are __**pointy**__! Gawd!"_

"_Is that Yuffie?" I delete another message, glancing at Tifa. She frowns, her brow furrowing._

"_Yea...we've got time for one thing. Then we better go."_

_Tifa nods her head. "What are we doing?" She asks, scarfing down her cotton candy._

"_Surprise," I shrug, and she grins big, linking her arm through mine._

_The line looks long from here, and I'm trying to keep it as inconspicious as possible as to where we are going, but as we weave through the crowd I spot a familiar face. I plant Tifa on the spot with a stern 'stay here'. She has a tendency to roam in theme parks._

_I hale the man down with a simple wave, and he bounces up to me, looking concerned._

"_Dio."_

"_Cloud! You know, I was invited to your wedding and was afraid I couldn't make it...but here...you are.... Did you know Yuffie's been calling me?"_

"_Yes. Sorry. Listen, can I ask a favor?"_

_As I weave back through the crowd, I latch back on to Tifa, tugging her towards the front of the line. She's already devoured her cotton candy, and is looking like she's on the trail to a pleasant sugar rush. _

_But she sobers up the minute she see's what line we have skipped to the front of, and what ride we are getting on._

_Tifa freezes, throwing me a frantic look, but I tug her on to the gondola with little resistance. Dio slides the door shut, and we begin our ascend into the air._

_Tifa looks at me frantically, almost embarrassed. "You...remember this?"_

_I nod my head, a little sheepish. I remember this night well, and I remember incredibly well that Tifa was going to say something, but...then there was the fireworks._

"_Oh," she says, small._

"_I want you to finish it." She doesn't ask what I'm talking about. By her reaction she clearly remembers what I'm talking about._

"_Uh," she starts nervous. "Why don't I tell you how I feel now?"_

_I try to suppress my frown, but she sees it. I'm baffled for a moment. Why is it so hard to say something that she wanted to years ago, which I'm pretty sure involved us, considering the fact that we're getting married... __**tomorrow**__. Oh dang, we need to speed this up._

"_It's hard," she starts. "It's not easy to remember exactly what I wanted to say...the exact words..." She's stalling. Probably for the fireworks._

"_Even if the fireworks come this time, you have to tell me."_

_As if on cue a bright ball of red splashes across the sky. Tifa tilts her head towards it, her face glowing red in the light._

_I think for a moment she's just going to let it lie._

"_Back then," she says, a little louder because the fireworks are still going off. "I wanted to say something... well, I wanted to say that I was really...falling for you. That I wanted something more. That I was sorry for the way you were treated when we were younger. That I saw you, and I wanted to really know you better, even though we were already friends. I wanted more." She looks at me now. "And now I want to say that I am glad I have this much, and I know I'll have more. That I'm sorry for all the things that have happened to you, not just when we were growing up. That I'm glad you know that I love you, and I am so happy that you love me. That's what I want to say now."_

_And I end it, like it should've ended all those years ago, by kissing her softly as the fireworks echo in the background. It may have taken longer than she wanted, than I wanted, but we're here now. And we have it, now... and that's all that really matters._

**A/N: **Oh me oh my! Yuffie had a conniption! Will they make it back in time for the wedding?! Will Yuffie slaughter them on sight?! WHO KNOWS! ...me, again.

Thanks for all the reviews, lovelies! I'm sorry for the late update, and the less than detailed author's note, once again.

Oh! The other week I watched **Dead Fantasy **for the first time. I WAS AWED. It is SO AWESOME! The entire time I kept thinking 'Bitches don't play! TIFA DONT PLAY! SHE KICKS ASS!' It reminded me once again why Tifa is my all time favorite video game character ever. BOOM BABY


	74. The Final Chapter

_The Final Chapter_

"_Oh my God! Look at the time! We've got a __**wedding **__people!" Cecil lifts his hands above his head, clapping twice. "Chop chop! I will not disappoint my dear Tifa!"_

_Cid steps up to him, glaring at him. "Listen you fruit pie, I ain't hearin none of your crap today. We've known Tifa years longer than you have, so shut yer trap before I shut it for you!"_

_Cecil stares at him flatly. "Oh, that was original. How long did it take you to come up with that?"_

"_Why you–_

"_Cid!" Barret steps in, grabbing Cid by the waist._

_Great, this is great. My wedding party is fighting. Come to think of it I really don't want to know what it would be like with Yuffie._

_Man I hope these bruises heal before tonight. She really did a number on me. I can't believe she waited all day yesterday in the road for us. I don't think she really cares that we're getting married. I think she just cares that this shit better be perfect because she thinks she's the one who did everything._

_Stupid shoes._

_Anyways, I haven't even __**seen **__Tifa since Yuffie tackled me off of Fenrir, and then kidnaped Tifa. Heaven forbid I see her on the day we get married, before the wedding. Isn't that the old superstition or something like that?_

_I don't know. All I know is that as soon as I could hear again after Yuffie boxed my ears, all I heard was:_

"_You can't see her! You can't see her!" And then scrambling footsteps, and possibly Tifa yelling at Yuffie. And then:_

"_I'll kill you later! Gotta get you married first! Hate you! Bye!"_

_The __**love **__around here. It's absolutely overwhelming._

_I swear if these freaking shoes..._

_Never mind the fact that I had to bodily wrestle Cid to not wear that god forsaken kilt. I mean, that thing ruined one wedding, and there's no reason for it to ruin someone else's, least of all my own. I mean, what was the point in even bringing that thing? He already had his tux's pants...it's not like we had a shortage of tux bottoms, or that the kilt was needed for an emergency bridesmaid dress._

_This is insane! Stupid!_

_Shoes! For __**real. **__Go on the feet!_

_I had to get Reeve to shave me this morning, as if that's embarrassing enough. My hands were shaking so bad I thought I was going to kill myself...then what would they say?_

'_That poor Strife couldn't handle it. Cut his neck open on the morning of his wedding. Poor Tifa. Poor Yuffie. You'd think she was the one left at the altar. 'S ok, though, Yuffie broke it off with Reno and Tifa and Reno got married three months later–_

_WHOA. Yea, that's where my train of thought went, and I think death is better than a relationship with Reno, so I called Reeve...even though I re-e-eally didn't want to. I had to. I mean, what do you do? How could I risk putting Tifa through that pain? How could I risk letting Reno get my woman?!_

_Meh, moot point._

_SHOES!_

_Shoes! I damn you to hell! And take Reno with you!_

_Today is not the day! I don't have time to wrestle with my shoelaces! This is ridiculous! I can't believe this is happening! It was bad enough that I nearly choked myself with this god forsaken tie... I almost lost a button trying to put my stupid shirt on, and now my shoelaces?_

_**Why are my clothes against me?!**_

"_That's it! I can't do this!" I yell, flinging my hands up._

_Frustration...building. Gonna scream!_

_Barret looks up at me from across the room, Cid's cigarette falls out of his mouth. Cecil lets out a manly squeak._

"_Oh..." Cecil puts his hand to his chest dramatically. "Oh my God," he gasps._

_Reeve glares at me. "I knew I should've let you killed yourself with your razor."_

"_What?!" Barret's head nearly falls off._

_And suddenly they're all advancing on me... it's pretty freaking scary._

_The psyche of a kilt wearing man, a gun __**welded **__to an arm, pointy shoes and claws, freaky cat robots, tooth and claw, ...gayness..._

_All coming at me!_

"_What do you mean you aren't getting married–_

"_Tried to kill yourself?! Are you crazy–_

"_Oh my God, I can't breathe! I can't breathe! Someone fan me–_

"_Shut up!" They all blink, startled. Cloud? Speaking? In tones above common decency?_

"_First of all I didn't try to kill myself. It was an accident. If I'm suicidal it's not my fault. I'm accidental suicidal. Get over it. Secondly, I'm going to get married. That's why I'm here. What I can't do is tie my fucking shoelaces so if someone would like to hop to it and help me out, I'd appreciate it...cause isn't that what you all are supposed to be doing? Lending a helping hand?"_

_Cecil steps forward. I point my finger at him. "Not you...go...do something...with the girls. Not here."_

_Cecil flees. He'll feel better with them anyways._

_I finally look at my friends._

_Barret glares at me. "Well, you did say 'I can't do this'. Excuse us for being a little reactive...we only assumed you were talking about one of the most monumental occasions of your __**life**__."_

_Oh go on and assume. Don't you know what assume means? Do you really, people? Assume - make an ass out of you and me.._

_You know, you is u, and me...is well...me...and then there's just ass. Ass-u-me._

_It makes perfect sense in my head._

_Cid ties my shoes for me._

_God this __**sucks**__. I can't do anything. 'I do' 'I do' That's all you have to say, but wait for it! Don't say it too early. When you're prompted. Prompted. I do. That's it. _

_And don't lock your knees._

_Ok. I can do this._

_I can do this._

_No problems. I have conquered all my fears._

_Babies._

_AGH! I can't do this! Am I crazy?! Getting married? Really? Whose bright idea was this anyways?!_

"_Cloud." I look up, they're all staring at me. Good thing I perfected 'calm face' a long time ago, reserved specifically for times when I'm about to spontaneously combust. "It's time."_

_Screw you! _

"_Ok."_

"_Just follow us," Barret says very slowly._

_I won't do it!_

"_Ok."_

"_Cloud." It's Cid, now. I blink at him as he puts a hand on my shoulder. "You can do this, just breathe. Remember... 'I do'. That's it. Don't say anything stupid. In fact, don't say anything at all. You can probably get away with just nodding your head when he asks you. Can you do that?"_

_I nod my head yes._

"_Good."_

_I can do this._

_I can do this._

_And then we're going down a hall, and outside. Heat, sunset, red canyons. People. People! Why are there people here? Who wants to see this?_

_Reno...he just wants to see me fail. Screw you Reno._

_How do we even know all these people? I don't know you. Who are you? You? And you! Why are you here?! This sucks this sucks this sucks._

_I don't even remember why I'm standing up here. I don't even remember the preacher's name, and he's smiling at me._

_Crap crap crap, what's his name? Is it even important? I'm not getting married to him. 'I do'. That's all I have to say._

_Why am I hear again?_

_Rufus. Turks. Man, why are they here?! _

_Nanaki's sitting beside of me. I glance down at him, noticing him as if I'm seeing him for the first time._

_He's red. _

_He has a Mohawk. Yea, I don't get that one either._

_Tattoos, ok, yea, whatever. Bangles? Bangles? Wolf face, but...not quite... sort of feline. Red? _

_What the heck is he?_

_Nanaki glances up at me, catching my eyes._

_I whisper out of the corner of my mouth. "What exactly are you?"_

_Nanaki glares at me flatly, and I hear him grumble, "Priorities."_

_Oh right, those things. _

_And then the sun hits this point, and then I see it clearly now. I know why I'm here, why I've gotten this far. I know who I am, and what I want._

_And I know when to say 'I do' and I'll say it, I won't just nod my head._

_Because she's walking towards me, and it doesn't matter if the Turks are here, or strangers, or that Cid almost wore his kilt, and there's a gay man crying at my wedding. It doesn't matter that I spent five years of my life as a test subject, or that even though this is me here, right now, I've been Zack before, and I know Sephiroth is still buried somewhere deep inside of me, and Jenova still tingles my skin from time to time if I think too hard–_

_And I know I've failed, and I know I've succeeded in some things, and I've watched more than one friend die, but I've also seen life. I know Shera is life, standing a few feet from me in a bulging dress, and I'd look at her, but I can't._

_I know I've seen betrayals, and I've seen hatred, and evil. But I've also seen healing, in Yuffie and Reno, and I've seen loyalty in my friends._

_And I've seen love._

_Love is smiling at me right now._

_But none of the things that have happened before in my life really compare to this moment. I appreciate it more because I've been in the cold grasp of death too many times, and because I've also seen __**her **__in that same position._

_And for once I know I've done something absolutely right._

_And she takes my hand, and her eyes match the roses in her hair._

_I still can't believe after all that's happened, between us, to us, to our friends and family, we're here. We're finally here. I still can't believe she said yes. To __**me **__people. To me. Look at this. I'm a walking freak show. I should charge people to even be in my presence! But she still said yes to me._

_She said yes._

**A/N: **So this ISNT the end. Technically it's the last chapter (der--final chapter) But there's still goodies to be had. I'm so sorry it's taking so long to update! I'm actually helping plan my sister's wedding right now. She's getting married in September so it's been extremely hectic!

Thanks so much for all the reviews! I'm sorry it's a little short, but I felt like it was perfect exactly the way it was. And if you'll notice it ends with the very first sentence in the story. Didn't plan that one. Trust me.

Stick around for a bit longer, it'll be worth it. I'd say more about the epilogue but I don't won't to ruin the surprise. :D


	75. Epilogue: Part Y

_Epilogue_

_Part Y_

_Such is my fate to be stuck at __**another**__ freaking wedding. Honestly, in my time of knowing these freaking crazy old people, none of them have taken into consideration that I hate weddings. Despise them almost as much as I despise marriage._

_I hope Reno never proposes to me. That would be __**weird**__._

_Still, as much as I hate weddings I adore receptions. Free drinks, lots of hot guys to dance with. Not to mention the fact this wouldn't have happened without yours truly, even after those ungrateful bastards decided to run out on me._

_Hup, it's once of Shera's brothers…one of the twins. Sorry pal, you had your chance. You are now related to Cid Highwind…nope, can't hit that._

_Heh, I love being evil._

"_Yuffie…"_

_My eyebrow rises as I glance at Barret, "Yes?"_

"_How many…have you already had?" he asks, gesturing to my empty margarita glass._

_I laugh, "Who cares? It's a freaking wedding. Live large or don't live at all. You should understand that, burnt marshmallow."_

_Barret narrows his eyes, but here comes the happy couple. I grin, waving him away as I head towards the dance floor. I have freaking got to dance with Barret…how messed up is that?! At least when I danced with Vince there was some semblance of a good time…but no! Freaking Spike had to stick me with Barret._

_Heh, burnt marshmallow. That was good, Yuffie…that was bloody awesome._

"…_damn Spike…stickin me with this stupid brat."_

_Apparently Barret is having as much trouble with this as I am._

"_I am not a brat," I hiss at him, shoving him towards the dance floor._

_We join the crowd surrounding the dance floor, and here they come. Gawd, Tifa looks so pretty. See, this is another completely viable reason why I can never get married, cos I will never look as fine as she does in a dress. …which shouldn't be white._

_Ah, well._

_Cloud, wow, what a freaking push over. _

_You know, he tries to act all big and bad, but look at him…he looks goofy. I know why he doesn't smile now. It isn't cause he's an emo whiny bitch…well, that's not exactly true…but rather, another reason why he doesn't smile is because he looks like a freaking idiot when he does. I mean, look at him! He's got the goofiest smile evah._

_It's ridiculous. I don't see how Tifa can look at that and be like 'hawt stuff'._

_Totally not._

_Still, he isn't even smiling all that big…I think he should smile bigger, but…well, at least he's smiling. You know, I bet if Vincent ever got married, then he wouldn't even crack a smile._

_Maybe I'm being too harsh on Cloud._

_Bump that, I'm always right._

_Cloud leads Tifa towards the center of the makeshift dance floor. They're actually going to Wutai to honeymoon, and then the Golden Saucer or that was the __**plan**__. But since they already went there, then maybe they'll just chill in Wutai, or go somewhere else. I think they were thinking about getting married in the church, but…I think, that there wouldn't have been enough room, and cleaning up Aerith's church is kind of wrong. I dunno…it just needs to stay the way it is._

_Anyways, someone's announcing the newly wedded couple, and how they're making their first dance as an official married couple._

'_At last,_

_My love has come along._

_My lonely days over_

_And life is like a song.'_

_Gawd, talk about sap ulitma…really. Still, Tifa's grinning so big. She's so pretty. Cloud doesn't look that half bad I must say once he's cleaned up. Cid told me he couldn't even tie his shoes earlier. Ha! Pansy._

'_Ooh At last_

_The skies above are blue_

_Well my heart was wrapped in clover_

_The night I looked at you.'_

_I'm surprised Cloud hasn't killed Tifa's toes yet. Usually, well, the last time he danced was at Cid's wedding, and then, he was busy focusing on Tifa and his feet. This time he can't take his eyes off of Tifa, and I'm the one cringing cause neither one of them seem to notice this impending doom._

_Gee, how unromantic and unwedding like would that be to step on your wife's toe the first time you dance as an official couple? While everyone is watching you?!_

_Weddings are too stressful._

'_I found a dream_

_That I could speak to_

_A dream that I can call my own_

_I found a thrill_

_To press my cheek to_

_A thrill that I have never known.'_

_Barret grabs my arm, and we get ready to move out onto the floor. Cid's dancing with Shera (well, duh), that leaves Reeve and Vincent. Vincent…well…Vincent…gawd I can't believe I'm saying this._

_He volunteered to dance with Marlene since at the last wedding Marlene got insulted by the fact that Denzel didn't dance with her first. How great is that? Ya know, I never noticed how much we keep to ourselves until Tifa needed bridesmaids. I mean, it was me, and Shera…but who else? Marlene got to be a bridesmaid too…how crazy is that? We need more women, I think. Too many men in AVALANCHE. Of course, there are the three unspoken members of the wedding party. Tifa said something about her friend Jesse, who passed back before I met any of these guys. _

_The other two are pretty easy to figure out. In fact, I can feel Aerith, and I'm sure her notorious boyfriend is with her. Oh the stories I've heard since Cloud finally found his voice. Sort of sounds like a SOLDIER I knew when I was a kid... he was a pushover, completely unreliable in getting materia. Well, he would get it, I would just steal it from him._

_Anyways, so Tifa asked Elena, just so Reeve wouldn't be left out._

_Course, because of that Tifa invited the rest of the Turks but even if that wouldn't have happened, she'd __**still **__have to invite Reno. But there was no way in hell Cloud was going to let Reno be in the wedding party._

_You can imagine the enthralling chaos that is bound to happen._

'_Well_

_You smile_

_You smile_

_Oh and then the spell was cast_

_And here we are in heaven_

_For you are mine at last.'_

_Damn, the song has ended. Barret pulls me out onto the floor, and now I have to dance with him._

_We need to finish at least this song before we can separate. How annoying._

"_If you ever call me a burnt marshmallow again—_

"_Oh shut up you big pansy. Let's just get this over with."_

_He grumbles something about me __**again**__, but I'm already moving on. Stupid Barret…I'm totally finding Denzel to dance with after this mess is over._

_Ya know…its surprisingly strange how good Vincent's claw looks in a tux. Although his shoes wouldn't look good. I still can't believe Cloud actually convinced him to wear real shoes, and not clown shoes._

_Barret drops my hand, and moves away quickly. Ha! Already done! I stay true to my word and find Denzel and dance with him. Little guy's shot up this past couple years. I wonder if it's got anything to do with him being better and all. I wonder if Geostigma could cause a growth stunt._

_I see Tifa dancing with Barret, then Cecil, then Cid, then Vincent, then Reeve, then Tseng, then Rude, then Reno for about ten seconds cause Cloud forcibly removes him from the dance floor._

_Heh, I should dance with him._

_Anyways, so after the dancing chaos comes the cake! Cake! Cake! Woo! _

_And much like Shera did to Cid, Tifa covers Cloud's face in cake._

_Of course the mental picture going through everyone's head is Tifa's birthday, and the unsolved mystery of the flying cake._

_Somehow, and I'm not going to say who, (Nanaki…clever bastard) someone pushes me out onto the floor when Tifa tosses the bouquet. Now, last time I freaked out…but this time, there's no way in hell I'm catching that thing! And it wasn't even true! Unless you want to say I passed on my marriage rights to Tifa._

_Damn…keep it away!_

_I don't want to get married! That means I'll have to assume responsibility! And that'll suck! Ass!_

_Tifa tosses it and it smacks me in the face. Damn, the woman needs to learn how to control her strength. Really._

"_Augh! No!" I throw back at Tifa, but she dodges it._

_No marriage!_

_I glance over, catching Reno's eyes. He wiggles his eyebrows at me and I roll my eyes._

_Yeah, __**right**__, like that horny bastard would ever consider marriage to anyone.  
_

_Cloud continues the unneeded tradition by shooting Tifa's garter into a horny crowd of males._

_It ricochets off of a champagne glass, and hits Reeve in the back of the head._

…_erm…I hope that doesn't mean I'm marrying Reeve._

_Scary._

_Now here comes the fun part, where every one eats and dances and drinks!_

_Not to mention the bad ass competition…well…as bad ass as ballroom dancing can be, that is currently taking place between Tseng and Elena and…Reeve and...ehmahgawd…is that __**Elmyra**__? Damn! Look at the old woman go! She's tearing it up! Oh Tseng is totally going to get owned!_

_It's hard to believe that these two finally tied the knot, I must say. I don't think any of us believed it would actually happen…there was always so much crap going on…ah well, such is life._

_But life for Cloud and Tifa…it's looking pretty damn good right about now._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_Fuck. Reno's got a ring box._

**_A/N: _**Kee sticking around :P maybe you figured out what's going on here


	76. Epilogue: Part C

_Epilogue_

_Part C_

_I always thought the day that bastard Sephiroth showed his pasty white ass back up in front of Cloud would be the end of our problems. I always thought that after that stupid scrawny spiky-headed jerk gave Tifa the heart attack of a life time cos she thought he was dead, that __**that **__would be the end of all the shit we'd have to put up with._

_I can't believe __**three months**__ after those two idiots tied the knot that something like this would happen. Vincent…well, Vincent is fighting for something. I don't think any of us can figure out exactly what…course, Vincent might not even be able to figure out what he's fighting for. Lot of shit surrounding this, it is. DeepGround…fuckers need a more original name if you ask me. But does anyone ever ask me? No…because I'm old and ornery as Tifa once put it._

_What the hell does ornery mean? She told me to look it up, and I told her to shove it up her ass._

_Course, I had to apologize after that, but still! I'm not…whatever the hell it was._

_I sigh, moving into the bedroom. There's a compartment in the bottom of the armoire, and inside of that is something I haven't had to use in a while. You have to hide these things, spears, when ya got a newborn._

_God, I'm a father. I don't know who thought that was a good idea, but okay._

_I never wanted a boring life…hell, I'm anything but boring. But dammit, I'm getting tired of having to grab my spear, hop on the airship and go off and save these idiots' asses! _

_I sigh, it's not like I'm going to say no, anyways. Dammit, I'm getting too freaking soft._

_I guess that comes with havin a kid._

_I stand, holding the spear in my hand. It's hard getting used to gripping this thing again. Hopefully Tifa can kick ass, and Cloud can use his mighty swords and I can just fly the fucking plane. I hope that's how it goes, anyways._

_Shera's staring at me. Dammit, stupid woman. I hate it when she stares at me…makes me feel like I'm a freak or something._

_I brush past her as I move out of the bedroom, propping my spear up against the wall. Gotta go kick ass and save the world again. I'm getting too damn old for this shit._

_I move into the newest room of our house. It's pink. It's bloody pink…it's like walking into a damn cotton candy ball of fluff._

_That's right…I Cid Highwind have successfully contributed to the birth of a little girl._

_Now, it's not that I don't mind having a little girl, I __**did **__call it after all…it's just shit fellas, couldn't I of had a son first to watch after the girl? I mean…dammit, I'm going to have to kick some stupid punk's ass sixteen years from now. It means even if all this bullshit save the world crap ever __**does**__ stop, I've got to still keep my spear so these little horny bastards don't take my daughter!  
_

_I sigh, leaning over the crib, looking down at the little pink wad. It's my little pink wad…mine._

_God I am turning soft._

_Scratch that, I've been soft._

_Quick! Every curse word and dirty song you can think of!  
_

_OH—_

_Maria hiccups, and I lose my train of thought._

"_Hi, Maria."_

_I put my hand on her forehead. It's amazing, this concept…babies…crazy. I mean, my hand is covering her forehead, and she's got the softest skin. I can't imagine my hands feel too good…man aren't they the tribute to the hard working man. There's a little spray of blonde hair on the top of her head. I almost wish it was brown._

_I need a smoke._

_Okay, so maybe Barret was right. Maybe I'll never quit smoking…outside the house, but dammit, I'm doing a pretty good job inside the house!_

_I swear, the world saving has the worst timing ever. I don't want to leave her…she's too little, my pink wad. She'll get hurt…yeah, lying in this crib. She's my kid…she'll figure out how to hurt herself just to piss me off._

_Maria coos, breaking my thought again, and wraps her entire little fist around my finger._

_She pulls on it._

"_That's dangerous, kid."_

_She laughs, unknowing the danger that can come from pulling fingers._

_Shera puts her hand on my back._

"_Cloud called…he was wondering when you were heading out."_

"_Stupid impatient bast—_

"_Watch it…" Shera says softly._

"_What? She can't understand me…can you little pink wad?" I tickle her stomach._

_Shera sighs, resting her head on my shoulder._

_I guess I could be more intimate…ya know the cuddly thing, but I'm not a pushover like Spike. I dunno, I always think this shit I should do before I go off and save the world. Doesn't matter, I know I'll have the chance to do it when I get back, even if I don't do it, I'll still have the chance._

_What, you think I'm going to die?_

_I'm too stubborn to die._

_I'm too fucking Cid to die._

**A/N: **I love Cid...he's straight to the point. Keep sticking around loves P:


	77. Epilogue: Part V

_Epilogue_

_Part V_

_I knew I shouldn't have come out of hiding… Of course, I suppose certain occasions require my presence._

_Yuffie made sure of this. I received more phone calls from her in the past week than I did in the past year. That's saying something, truly._

_I lift my hand slowly to the familiar door, before knocking it twice. I can already hear voices inside, and the door finally opens after a heated argument._

_Cloud stares back at me for about half a second, a little surprised to see me._

"_Vincent," he says, offering his hand._

_I shake it. That is one thing about Cloud; he's quiet, and straight to the point. _

_FUH-HONK!_

_Though the same cannot be said about Yuffie who is currently standing beside of Cloud blowing on a party favor. It rushes out and hits my nose, letting out an obnoxious noise._

_That's the other thing about Cloud…you can always count on him to shut Yuffie up._

_Cloud's fist grips down on the paper party favor, the noise dying, and Yuffie looks at him._

_She removes her mouth, "Hey!"_

_Cloud glares at her, and I notice for the first time the purplish black bags beneath his eyes._

"_No sleep," he says softly, wrenching the thing from Yuffie's hands._

_She squeaks, and Cloud tosses the party favor out onto the street. It conveniently lands in a puddle._

"_Kuh-loud! That was mine—_

_Cloud glares at her, "Yuffie…I swear, if you wake—_

"_What are you guys doing?" Tifa's somehow manages to get between Cloud and Yuffie._

"_Erm," Yuffie squirms beneath Tifa's gaze, and Cloud falls silent._

"_Here Vincent is, and we haven't seen him in ages, and you guys keep him standing in the doorway! Come on in, Vincent," she grabs my hand, pulling me between the two._

"_Thank you, Tifa."_

_She releases me as we make our way inside. "It isn't a problem. Cloud's been a little high strung these last few days, and with Yuffie…well…"_

"_I understand," I reply, and she smiles._

_She too, has bags beneath her eyes. However, they aren't as big and something tells me Cloud's been making her sleep, forfeiting his own. She's still a little wide around the middle, but I bet that she'll be back to normal in no time. Tifa isn't one to sit still, so I believe the weight will be lost soon._

_Tifa leads me into the dinning room where it seems everyone has gathered._

"_Hey, stranger!" I get a hardy clap on the back from Barret._

_Shera's holding onto Maria's hand, trying to keep her from getting lost in the crowd. I believe she is two now, or somewhere around that age._

_Cid's sitting at the table sipping on a beer, laughing at something Reeve's said. Reeve hasn't changed much, still head of the WRO, and rebuilding around Midgar. He calls Maria over, and gives her a cait syth doll. She giggles, and tugs it around behind her, but not before she gives Cid a hug._

_Cid still hasn't gotten use to shows of affection it seems, because he flushes a bit, and pats her back awkwardly. Maybe it's just public shows of affection._

_Reeve laughs at him, and Cid smacks the back of his head as Yuffie sits down between Cid and Reno. That is still an addition I cannot get used to, but neither is the ring on Yuffie's right finger._

_I don't think she'll ever set a date, really._

_Nanaki is sitting beside of Denzel on the floor, who's taller than the last time I saw him. His hair's shaggier too, if that's even possible._

_They actually are carrying on a rather intelligent conversation, for a boy who's twelve or thirteen._

_Marlene comes in from the kitchen. "Look! I made a cake!" _

_She grins, setting out a pink and white cake on the table, and walks over to me._

"_Vincent, good to see you." She grins._

_I nod my head, and she stares at me._

"_Well don't just stand there, silly! Give me a hug!"_

_I had forgotten about this. I believe Marlene is the third person I've hugged in the entirety of my life. I can't remember who the other two are, but I'm certain I must've hugged at least two other people in my life time._

_I think…_

_I hug Marlene rather awkwardly, which is pretty much all my hugs. I mean, look at me…do I look like a person who offers out hugs to the nearest person?_

_I think not. I haven't had much practice in this field._

_Marlene releases me, grinning again. "Wait till you see her. She's so pretty."_

_Cloud moves into the room, gathering everyone's attention with a glare._

_He's been practicing._

"_Alright…listen up…she doesn't quite understand the difference between night and day yet. She's sleeping right now, but Tifa's going to bring her down. I need you guys to be quiet. If you aren't quiet, I'm going to toss you out a window on the second floor. I'm serious. I haven't slept…I can't even remember what today is. Please…guys…for once, just be quiet. You especially Yuffie."_

_Yuffie scoffs, but I must say, that was quite the speech. I don't think I've ever heard Cloud talk that much at one time. Not that I can say anything about that, though._

_Tifa comes in slowly, a tiny bundle in her arms. Tifa looks nervous though, as if she has no clue how to hold this baby. Cloud takes her, and surprisingly looks more at home holding the baby than Tifa. Really, I would've thought it the other way around. Cloud looks down, and everyone cranes in to see the child, but he's staring at her. I wonder what it is like to experience this joy. Only about four or five years ago Cloud was asking me about sins, and whether or not they could be forgiven. I believe he has made the most of his life, and couldn't be happier. It's strange, different, to see him so light. Even at his wedding, I do not believe he really conceived what was happening. I do not believe I will ever experience the joy of having a child, but I'm happy enough witnessing the joy of others._

"_Can I see her?" Yuffie whispers._

_Cid chuckles lowly._

_Cloud slowly walks towards Yuffie and holds the bundle out towards her, Cid, Reno, and Reeve leaning over her shoulders to see the child._

_Tifa places her hands on Cloud's shoulders, staring down at the baby in his arms._

"_This is Emily Amelia Strife," Tifa says softly, proudly._

_Yuffie gasps, and is acting like she's never seen a baby before._

"_She's waking up!" Reeve hisses, and almost sounds scared._

_Really, I would expect him to the most scared. He doesn't strike me as a baby person._

_Cloud gives a little smile, passing the baby into Tifa's arms. She looks helpless, but takes Emily anyways, getting her situated into her arms._

_Tifa walks around the room, showing Emily off to Nanaki and the others, before finally making her way awkwardly towards me._

"_See, Vincent?"_

_I blink, staring down at the strange combination. Really, I hadn't expected such a combination to look so well._

_She has her father's hair color, a small tuft of bright blonde sitting at the top of her head in wild spikes. Her eyes though staring up at me are big and round, and a warm reddish-brown color. The combination is striking, and I reach out subconsciously, touching Emily's cheek. _

_She gurgles something, grabbing my finger, and I look up at Tifa._

"_Congratulations."_

_She grins. "Thanks."_

_A hard pressure comes down on my finger, and I glance down. I'm glad Emily isn't teething; else this might be somewhat hinting at painful._

_Tifa giggles, staring at Emily whose bitten my finger, looking at ease with the girl in her arms for the first time._

"_She did the same thing to Cloud."_

**A/N: **I don't think I dove into the depths of Vin's mind to well, which is exactly the reason why I don't write a story about him, haha....I've said it before and I'll say it again. I absolutely adores Yuffentines when done correctly, but I honestly don't feel like I know Vincent's character well enough to write a fic that could attach a believable story line b/w him and Yuffie...if you notice in any of my stories I always put Yuffie either on the side just closer to vincent, not necessarily romantic, but more in tune with him. On the other hand I completely (and obviously) support a good Reffie...they're just too much trouble to ignore, and honestly, the main reason I never write Yuffentines (and my inner fangirl hates me for it) is I can honestly say I'll never truly believe Vincent would ever get with anyone after Lucrecia. I just see him literally as a loner. But that's in actuality. I reiterate, I enjoy a good Yuffentine, but for me trying to keep this story as 'realistic' as possible, I couldn't put Yuffie and Vincent together and feel right about it. Does that make sense? Hope it does. Don't kill me Yuffentine lovers!


	78. Epilogue: Part B

_Epilogue_

_Part B_

_I never actually thought this day would come…course, I guess that goes with a lot of days that I've had. Most days that I think that, they're rather tragic and truly unbelievable, course, today, it isn't so tragic. It is kind of unbelievable, cause I can't imagine Seventh Heaven without Tifa, it just doesn't feel normal. Marlene keeps sayin that change is good, papa. I wish it was as easy as that. It's kinda sad, but it's kinda happy, I suppose. _

_Marlene is keeping little Emily entertained, playing these little hand games…they slap each others hands, and Marlene sings a little song. She's two now, Emily. Seems just like yesterday we were seeing her for the first time._

_Emily's got quite a look about her, her mother's delicate face, and her father's bright hair. Her hair, though, is growing out to about her mid back, and it's wavy rather than the uncontrollable mass it had been when she was born. She's still got Tifa's eyes, though which creates even a more stunning look against her hair._

_She spots me, and lets out a garbled slaughter of my name._

_"Babbet!"_

_Yuffie wouldn't let me live that down for ages…still won't. Course, I have to say Emily's name for Yuffie is better. Foofie…heh._

_"Hey, munchkin," I say, leaning down to pat her head._

_She giggles, giving a toothy grin._

_"Dad, Tifa needs your help…she's still got a couple boxes inside, and Cloud's trying to get the couch up on the truck. He isn't having much success…Denzel's too scrawny to help him."_

_"Alright," I grunt, moving inside._

_It feels empty inside, with a few boxes stacked in the corner by the door. They've left the bar tables and chairs, but everything else is pretty much empty. There's some glasses and drinks behind the bar left for the new owners. That was something Tifa was glad about, the bar being sold but kept a bar._

_There are a couple thuds, and I see Tifa descending the stairs._

_"Girl! What is wrong with you?" I spit, moving towards the stairs quickly._

_"Oh, Barret? Is that you?"_

_"Is that me? Who tha hell do you think it is?" I growl, grabbing the box from her hands._

_She grins at me, her stomach bulging. _

_"I can't believe you've still got another month."_

_Tifa groans, patting her stomach. "Neither can I."_

_"You're turning into a freaking baby factory."_

_"Barret!" she punches my arm…damn, girl's still got it._

_I grunt, carting the box over to the corner._

_"That's the last one…could you go around back? I think Cloud's still fighting the couch." She grins, picking up a little box._

_"Tifa…"_

_"I'm not helpless. I can still kick your butt if you want me to prove it."_

_"Ha," I mutter, grabbing three boxes._

_It's true; the moving truck has yet to acquire a couch. It's halfway on, and Denzel is struggling with his end. He drops it, and it bangs loudly._

_Cloud curses and glances up, catching sight of us. He nods his head towards the couch. Punk ass bitch, doesn't even ask…just expects me to help—alright, I was gonna help…but still…he could've at least asked._

_I lift Denzel's end easily, and we get the couch into the truck._

_"Thanks, Barret," Cloud says._

_"Yeah, whatever."_

_"Barret…" Tifa grins. "Thanks for driving the truck."_

_I shrug. "Denzel needs to get his license."_

_"I've got my permit, back off." Denzel sulks._

_"And he's going to drive, Tifa," Cloud says._

_"Ha! You must be joking Cloud Strife. The boy just got his permit…he isn't driving that whole way!"_

_"I'm not a boy!"_

_"Fine, but he needs to drive some."_

_"What, you think cause I'm pregnant I can't drive?"_

_"I didn't say that, Tifa…he needs practice."_

_"He can practice when my belly isn't full of baby, okay?"_

_Cloud glowers. "You're going to get tired, and complain."_

_"She's going to complain regardless," Denzel interjects._

_"Denzel!" Both of them hiss at the same time._

_"Fine," Tifa says curtly. "He can drive __**some**__. Not all."_

_"Fine," Cloud says tersely._

_"Why don't I drive Fenrir—_

_"__**NO**__," we all say, and Denzel sulks off to the car._

_I give a gruff laugh. "Forgot how feisty you could be when you was pregnant, Tifa."_

_She shrugs. "I know."_

_"I haven't," Cloud mumbles, closing the back of the truck._

_"Is that everything?" I ask._

_Cloud nods his head, and Tifa glances over her shoulder. _

_"Weird," she says, rubbing her arms. _

_Cloud puts a hand on her shoulder, staring up at the building._

_"We built this place guys…you sure about this?" I ask._

_"Not unless you want to buy it, Barret," Cloud says._

_"Bitch watch it." I growl._

_Tifa slaps Cloud's arm. "Let's go…I can't wait till we live on the beach. I'll send Marlene over, Barret…and then we'll all head to the ferry."_

_I nod my head, and Cloud and Tifa disappear inside to walk back to the front._

_I stare up at the building again, and glance at the moving truck._

_It's perfectly understandable, wanting to move when you've got a kid that's two, and another on the way that you don't want to live above a bar. They were getting too big for that little place anyways, and with all the money those two saved up, they're getting a real good place._

_It'll be weird, though…_

_No Seventh Heaven…it's sad…_

_Marlene wraps her arms around me. "Ready to go, papa?"_

_"Yeah," I say, putting my hand on her head._

_At least I'm getting my little girl back…after all these years I'm finally getting to take care of her. We can visit them a lot, too. Costa del Sol is closer to Corel than Edge. _

**A/N: **Jeezy peezy I've been busy! School's started back up, my sister got married this past weekend, working, Augh! Nevermind the fact that I don't even have my computer in my apartment (Gotta get a wifi adapter) and I have my parents laptop...be glad I emailed this to myself lol

Thanks as always, loves! I appreciate all the reviews, and I'll get around to replying next time when I have a second to breathe!


	79. Epilogue: Part R

_Epilogue_

_Part R_

_I don't think Tifa wants to admit that this day has come. She's standing on the balcony, gripping her hands, and biting her lip. She looks like a nervous wreck, seriously, but every kid grows up._

"_Hey, thanks for…well, this," Cloud says from behind me._

_I glance at him. "It isn't a problem. He's gifted, and he deserves the best education anyone can give him."_

"_Yeah," Cloud says, dropping a stuffed duffle bag into the truck._

_I shrug. "At least he'll be going somewhere he already knows."_

_Cloud frowns. "Been a few years since Edge."_

_I grin. "Hey, I might as well put my pull to good use. You know, most parents would be glad they didn't have to pay for their child's education. You've got two more to take care of him."_

"_Three," Cloud says._

_My eyebrows raise. This could be dangerous. Pregnant Tifa and myself do not get along. I remember the first time Tifa got pregnant I was on a warpath politically speaking and had hardly anytime to visit the old crew. That combined with my personal mail getting piled beneath a bunch of business mail left me completely clueless and cutoff from the gang. Yuffie showed up at my office one day inexplicably, though, and forcibly drug me from there to the bar in which I proceeded to exclaim something very rude and stupid to Tifa, pregnant or not._

'_Good God woman, you've put on some pounds!'_

'_I'm not __**fat **__you belligerent idiot, I'm __**pregnant**__!'_

_This of course became a rather quick joke, especially when Tifa got pregnant again._

"_Really? Already?"_

"_Hey, we waited another year."_

_I chuckle. "I wonder if you two will ever stop."_

_Cloud narrows his eyes, before shrugging._

_The door bangs open to the villa, and Denzel comes rushing out with another bag on his shoulder, and a pillow stuffed under one arm._

_He grins as he reaches us, looking down at us. You know, Cloud's height or lack there of was never more obvious than in this moment. Denzel's a tree, really, I figured he would've stopped growing by now._

_Apparently I was wrong._

"_Is that everything?" I ask him._

_He nods his head, still grinning._

"_Toss it in the truck, then, and we'll head for the ferry soon," I say, and Denzel complies._

"_I better go get Tifa," Cloud mutters._

"_She'll come," Denzel says._

"_No she won't," Cloud says. "She knows you won't leave till you say goodbye, and you can't say goodbye if she doesn't come."_

"_Oh, she's delaying the inevitable," I muse, and Cloud nods his head._

"_Why don't you go get her, Denzel?" Cloud suggests, and Denzel rushes back into the house to pull the woman away from the balcony._

_I glance at Cloud. "So how much worse do you think she'll be when Emily and Ben go to college?"_

_Cloud glares at me. "Please don't mention that."_

_I smirk. "What? Don't want to see your little girl as a full grown eighteen year old?"_

_Cloud's about to let out a few choice words, but my saving grace is actually the subject. _

_Emily comes rushing out of the house, tugging on her brother's arm. _

"_Be careful, Emily. Don't hurt your brother," Cloud intones, probably an hourly saying._

_It's strange, even after two children and nearly five years of seeing it, I still can't believe Cloud's a father. It's crazy, it's always been crazy. It's a little disturbing, and a little crazy…_

_I remember back when Emily was conceived Cloud came to me worried that the mako or the Jenova cells would affect the baby. I did some tests, and the results were unclear, and that only made him more anxious. _

_But Emily came out fine, healthy and normal. Ben was a little on the small side, but he was as healthy as his sister. I know after Ben was born he was fine, but now that Tifa's pregnant again, good lord __**again**__, I'm sure he's worried that what didn't go wrong the first two times will go wrong this time. What is it, third time's a charm? I hope not in this case._

"_Strange, seeing him go to college," Cloud says, picking up Ben. "I never went, and neither did Tifa. He'll be okay, right?" He asks me, glancing at me._

_Ben's staring at me. He's an exact replica of his father, and it's a bit unnerving staring at mini-Cloud. I can truly say this is almost exactly what Cloud looked like when he was two…although there is a bit of Tifa to Ben, not much._

"_Reeve?"_

"_Oh right, yeah. He'll be fine. College is fun; you learn a lot of things, gain experience for life—_

"_Don't let him…do anything stupid," Cloud says in his warning tone._

"_What? Like—_

"_Like something stupid. Don't let him do anything I would do."_

"_You now or you eighteen? I'm sure those would've been quite the contrast of personalities. Weren't you the one apart of a terrorist group, and carried a huge sword on your back? Still do, might I add—_

"_Reeve—_

"_Daddy?" Emily looks up at her father with her big, red-brown eyes._

"_What is it, Emily?"_

"_Hug me," the little girl demands, holding up her arms._

"_Um, Em, I'm holding your brother—_

"_Hug me."_

"_Emily—_

"_Hug me."_

"_Em—_

"_Hug me."_

_Cloud sighs, trying to put Ben down, but Ben breaks into a wail of terror as his feet touches the ground. Cloud lifts him up quickly, Emily covering her ears. Cloud grunts, shifting Ben into his right arm, and picking Emily up with his left arm._

_Emily sighs as Cloud straightens, crossing her arms. "I told you to hug me…not pick me up."_

_Cloud narrows his eyes._

"_Smart kid, for a four year old," I state._

_He glares at me._

_The door opens, though, and Denzel comes out followed by Tifa. Huh, she does look a bit wider around the middle._

_She's a bloody baby factory._

"_How big of a family do you want, Cloud?" I mutter._

_He glares at me again. "That isn't your concern."_

"_I can't get full scholarships for eight children—_

"_We've only had two—_

"_You've got another one on the way."_

_He opens his mouth to say something, but Tifa reaches us. She takes Ben, smiling sadly at Denzel._

"_Well, I guess this is it."_

"_I'll be back in a few weeks…to visit," Denzel replies._

"_You better," Emily huffs. "Else I'll be mad."_

_Denzel ruffles her hair, and kisses her cheek, pats Ben on the head, and hugs and kisses Tifa's cheek too. Cloud gives him an awkward, one armed hug, and Emily manages to throw her arms around Denzel's neck from Cloud's arm._

"_At least Marlene will be there with you, Denz." Tifa smiles._

"_That's right…we've got to go pick her up too," I mutter. "Barret's going to be eight times worse than this."_

"_If he cries, please record it," Cloud mutters._

_Denzel laughs and we say our goodbyes and head for the truck._

_We climb in it, and I glance at Denzel._

"_Say Denzel, how many kids do you think they'll end up having?"_

"_What? Is Tifa pregnant __**again**__?"_

**A/N: **Insanity...I haz it. Thanks for the reviews loves! Sorry it took so long. I repeat The insanity otherwise known as life.

:D


	80. Epilogue: Part T

_Epilogue_

_Part T_

_It's gotten cool again. Emily is still disappointed that I won't let her swim anymore. There's a lot more laundry to do now, even with Denzel gone. I swear those two go through more clothes than anyone. Course, Emily is always getting into some kind of adventure, and Ben is never too far behind._

_Once again, I find it hard for me to fold clothes by the fact that my stomach is getting in the way._

_Again._

_You know, I really like having kids. I like being a mother…I'll admit, I was a bit scared the first time around with Emily, but I was fine after a while, but I am telling you…the crap I have to go through for this? Ugh…I hate being big. It's hard to get used too, like really. I feel off balanced…top heavy. Heh, middle heavy. I don't know, it's just…grr…_

_Denzel will be coming home to visit soon. Cloud's still all weird since he turned thirty. Honestly, he's acting like it's some big deal, and it isn't. Heh, I guess he feels old. Course, I'll probably be the same way when my birthday rolls around. Depressing._

_Something bumps in my belly, and I drop the shirt I'm holding, giving a little gasp. I swear, this one kicks more than Emily did…I think he's impatient to get out. He'll probably give Emily a run for her money once he can walk. Goodness, look at me…thinking about this one already walking._

_Huh._

_Cloud __**still**__ can't decide a name for him. He's such a worry wart, really…it's funny though. Still, I remember when Emily was born how much more calm he was than me. He's actually really good with kids…I mean, he was awkward a bit with Denzel and Marlene…maybe it's just because he didn't raise them from birth. I don't know. As much as I know Cloud, I think it's impossible to understand him. _

_Who can even begin to imagine what goes through his head?_

_He kicks again, and I sigh, dropping the shirt into the basket. _

_Alright, little one, I'll fold clothes later since that isn't good enough for you right now._

_I think this one's in a rush to get out…and I'm so big, too. I'm bigger than when I had Emily and Ben…ugh, I feel like I should pop. _

_I sigh, heading across the bedroom._

_We got lucky with this place, really. I love it here; it's so much more open, and beautiful than Edge, than any city, really. Cloud was serious, I guess, and he worked hard to get us here. We are pretty lucky though that Reeve got Denzel and Marlene through college. That'll take a load off. Still, I think after everything that's happened, I think it was worth it._

_I find my hat lying on the dresser before I head outside._

_You know, when you're pregnant, you've got extra baggage? Well, I find it endearing to wear what your husband has always found you attractive in. That way, it's kind of like evening out the extra weight, but it's an outfit he loves._

_Mine's as simple as my blue dress, and the pearls he gave me. It's great._

_I head outside onto the balcony through the door in our bedroom. I head to the railing, leaning on it slightly as I watch the beach before me._

_Emily is inspecting the surrounding sand, undoubtedly looking for seashells to add to her growing collection._

_Cloud's sitting a few feet away from her in the sand, keeping an eye on her while he helps to decorate the sand hump Ben's built._

_Ben is happily stumbling through the sand trying to find decorations for his little sandy mound. I love to just stand up here and watch them…it's more entertaining than it sounds, really._

_I sigh happily, leaning on my elbow, watching as Ben chases Emily across the sand. I think Cloud's a good father, a better one than he thinks himself as. He's still hard on himself, but I think he'll always be…that's just who he is, really. At least he isn't as hard on himself as he used to be, and he knows how to forgive himself now. A lot of things happened in our past, and I'm glad to see him growing, and moving on._

_Cloud glances over his shoulder, spotting me and stares at me for a second. I stare back, smiling, until Emily and Ben tackles him into the sand._

_I laugh, and head inside to finish the laundry._

_They head in soon after, and Cloud gets them settled in, giving them baths, snacks, and sends them to take their nap. _

_I'm finishing up the last of laundry when he finally finds me._

"_Emily wouldn't take her nap."_

_I glance at him. "Did you finally get her to lay down?"_

_He nods. "Fell asleep on the couch when I told her she could stay up..."_

_I giggle. "Smooth."_

_He shrugs walking towards me, and envelops me in his arms. It doesn't matter how many times he does this, it will never get old, and I will love it every time._

_He rests his head on my shoulder, and even though this should be a happy time (What with my overgrown stomach and everything) I can feel his tension, and his worry. He's always afraid that something will go wrong with the pregnancy. He never told me about it, but Reeve has spoken with me about it. I was a little worried too with Emily, but she was fine and so is Ben. As I said earlier, Cloud is a worry wart. He'll worry about anything._

_I fold the last shirt. "Well? Any name yet?"_

_He sighs, releasing me and sitting on the bed, shrugging._

_I grin, tilting my head. "There must be at least __**one**__ name going through your head."_

_He shrugs again, glancing off to the side._

_I swear, for a man who's thirty he sure is a lot like a kid sometimes._

"_I won't laugh, I promise. Even if...even if it's Xavier or something like that."_

_He gives a little smirk, but his grim expression returns. I sigh, putting the clothes into the dresser before making my way back over to him._

_I stand before him, poking his shoulder. "Well?"_

_He mumbles, "..axe..."_

"_**What**__? You want to name our son what?"_

_He mumbles again incoherently._

"_Axe? Did I hear correctly?"_

_His head darts up sharply. "No. Zack."_

_I blink. "Oh...oh see that's much better."_

_He shrugs, still perturbed. I think he thinks that naming his son Zack will guarantee something will happen that involves mako or Jenova or something like that. He doesn't want his son to go through the same thing his best friend did._

_Cloud's sitting there, staring off into space. He does that every now and then; I seriously think he has debates in his head._

"_You know, I'm sure Zack would appreciate the thought," I say, nudging him._

_His cheeks flush a little, and he shrugs again. _

"_He'd probably have some snarky comment about it, too." I grin._

_He nods his head. "Probably."_

_I pull his cheek. "Then cheer up, buttercup."_

_He glares up at me, amusement gone from his face, but I grin._

"_Oh you know you love it." I grin._

_He shrugs. "Better than Maurice."_

_I laugh. "Too true, buttercup."_

_He grimaces again, but a call comes from the doorway. "Momma?"_

_I glance over my shoulder, catching sight of Emily rubbing her eyes._

"_What is it, sweetie?" I ask, walking over._

"_I can't find Caity," she sniffles._

_I frown, Reeve gave all the kids little cait syth dolls. Emily can't sleep without her's. I bet it fell behind her bed again._

"_Come on, sweetie," I say, taking her hand. "I'll help you find it. Say bye to daddy." I grin._

_Cloud gives a little wave, and smiles to Emily as she stares at him from the doorway._

"_Night night, buttercup," she says, walking out the room._

_Cloud's face falls, and I laugh, following my daughter out of the room._


	81. Epilogue: Part N

_Epilogue_

_Part N_

_It's been quite some time since I have been to Costa del Sol. It's strange, really, since finding my people I have felt no need to leave the Canyon. _

_I must get out more._

_Maria comes tearing down the hall, followed by her brother, Grant, Shera trailing after them in an effort to stop them. Honestly I cannot imagine raising the offspring of Cid Highwind's._

_I cannot imagine Cid Highwind raising any offspring._

_I suppress a shudder, watching as Maria and Grant get put in their place._

"_What are ya doin?" Cid yells from his place overlooking the bridge._

_The two children halt almost instantaneously, Grant bumping into his sister._

_Obviously, despite my previous thoughts, these are two well disciplined children._

"_Runnin through the bridge! How many times do I have to tell you? That's stupid and careless and if you knock somethin over, you're cleanin it! Got it you two hyperactive teens?"_

_Shera sighs, putting her hands on her hips. "Cid."_

"_Just respect your mom. If she tells you to stop, then you listen to her–_

"_Cid–_

"_Hush, Shera, I'm trying to teach our children– _

"_I'm not a kid! I'm almost seventeen!"_

"_Hush, Maria! Anyways, respect your–_

"_Cid!"_

"_Shera!"_

"_Cid! I told them to get here fast as possible because the landing gear is stuck again and you __**still**__ haven't fixed the intercom in the engine room!"_

"_Well why didn't you fu–_

"_Cid!"_

"_Fudging say anything? Take the wheel, Shera! I'm goin down!"_

_Cid rushes down towards the floor below, Grant and Maria following Shera up. I shake my head as Cid rushes past, pulling out a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket._

"_Cid–_

"_They won't be there woman! Let me have something!" he yells over his shoulder._

"_No! Not the cigarettes! Fix the intercom while your at it!"_

"_Bah!"_

_It is not too long after this that Cid gets the landing gear unstuck, and we land in Costa del Sol close to Cloud and Tifa's home to a welcoming crowd._

_It's strange being out here, again._

_What is even stranger, though, is seeing Cloud and Tifa aging. I remember Cloud as a young man, with so much life before him, and Tifa as a beautiful woman, with just as much life before her, as well. It is amazing to see how much time has passed in their years._

"_Maria!" Emily squeals, dashing forward to hug the other girl._

_Emily is fourteen...or fifteen now. Ben is two years younger than her, and Zack three years younger than him. Ben is still a replica of Cloud physically, though his personality is much more open, and Zack looks exactly like his mother; it's uncanny, because he's exactly like his father. Even though he has his mother's eyes, and hair color, his hair is almost as defiant as his father's. He's very quiet, but very smart and caring. _

"_Fluffy!" _

_Only one more, Nanaki...one more small child to deal with._

"_Ack! Aeris no!" Tifa yells, trying to catch her daughters hand._

_Aeris is too quick, though; she's the fastest five year old I've ever seen. She throws herself at me, burying her face in my mane, and wrapping her arms around my neck._

"_I missed you Reddy," she says, muffled in my hair._

"_And I you, Aeris," I say, laying a gentle paw on her back. _

_She pulls back, grinning. Another amazing thing, their child, Aeris, is exactly like Aerith was. She has Tifa's hair, and Cloud's eyes, though, as stunning of a combination as Emily._

_Another car is driving up as Tifa apologizes for Aeris' rashness._

_Yuffie stumbles out of it, looking as strange as these other people do_. _As always comes the strange addition of Reno, and their small gangly child. There is still something almost disturbing about this combination... The first time Reno made a move on Yuffie, she punched him square on the nose, declaring him ShinRa scum._

_The first time Yuffie made a move on Reno, Reno dumped a slushy on her head._

_They got engaged after mere months of dating and took years to actually get married._

_It has proved an interesting relationship indeed._

"_Yuffie!" Tifa hugs her tightly._

_Cloud grunts some type of greeting to Reno, and Reno responds with a shrug. Their feelings will never change, especially after Cloud slammed the door in Reno's face at his birthday party._

"_Hey, Ren Ren!" Aeris grins up at Reno, and Reno gives an awkward smile down._

"_Well, hey there accident–I mean Aeris."_

"_Reno!" Yuffie squeals._

_Aeris crosses her arms stubbornly. "I was not an accident. I was a surprise."_

_But Reno isn't listening, he's too busy trying to escape Cloud's glare._

"_Um, why don't we move inside, everyone?" Tifa grins, pulling on Cloud's arm._

_Cloud refuses to budge, but she gives him a forceful jerk, and he stumbles away from Reno. Seems Cloud forgets that Tifa is still as strong as she's ever been. _

_Barret is inside the house with a slightly large Marlene, Reeve, and Denzel._ _Reeve is Denzel's boss; Denzel graduated with his engineering degree, and has been working for Reeve ever since. I have missed my conversations with the boy._

_Or...the man, I suppose._

_There is even more chaos inside this house than there used to be in Seventh Heaven. It's strange, still even after all these years, not meeting in that bar. Still, there is something familiar about this place; I suppose it is the mass amount of people. It is still strange to this day to see the small children of my friends running around, and the older children. It is strange seeing their children at about the same age I met them._

_Ben is standing with Zack watching as Emily and Maria entertain Aeris with her Cait Syth doll. Yuffie, Barret, and Reeve are talking, Reno trying to keep track of his kid. That must be strange for him. Denzel and Marlene speak with Cid and Shera, Grant standing by his father._

_Cloud is helping Tifa carry in trays; she sets one down on the table, and rubs her shoulder. Cloud puts his hand on her shoulder, and he leans down, whispering something into her ear. She flushes, kissing his cheek and squeezing his hand. They separate after that, and I watch. It is a wonderful thing that they are still in love after all this time._

_Cloud's eyes meet mine, or rather, Aeris' eyes meet mine, and she grins._

"_What is it, child?"_

_She giggles, "You have a big nose, Reddy Teddy."_


	82. Cloud Strife

**And without further ado, spanning over 70 chapters, and requiring over a year's length to write, I present to you the end of the ultimate CloTi epic.**

**Enjoy.**

_Epilogue_

_Cloud Strife_

_People take things for granted...things as easy as names, personalities, dreams. I lost mine once...and I lost a lot more than just my personality. I lost friends, people I cared for._

_Some people say that in order to gain something, you have to lose something. It's selfish of me to want to have everything I have and never lose anything...but, I think without the sacrifices of my friends that I wouldn't get to live in such a peaceful– well, relatively peaceful world today. I used to wish I had made the sacrifice in their stead...that I had been the one to pass on, and they had been the ones to live. I realize I can't dwell on that anymore...nor can I dwell on what I could've done to save them. Part of life...part of being human is losing and gaining. I have realized though that even though I have lost so much, I have also gained much more than I could've ever imagined._

_Sometimes it's easy to blend into the background. As much as I used to want to be a hero when I was young, I just wish they would all leave me alone. I just want to be normal._

_I feel it sometimes...Jenova, Sephiroth...Zack... like a pulse in a sudden expanse of nothing._

_If you had told me, years ago, laying beneath a blanket of stars, the sky streaked red by Meteor, that I would find peace I wouldn't have believed you._

_If you had told me, years ago, sitting beneath a blanket of stars with Tifa, that I had found love, I wouldn't have believed you._

_I mean I was only fifteen._

_I don't know why I've been so contemplative lately, but I think it's because I have a grayness in my chest. I don't know what else to call it, and neither do the doctors, and I don't know how long..._

_I hated gray a few years ago, when it started popping up in my hair. Tifa made fun of me._

_I started loving it when it streaked Tifa's hair, and not just because I could pick on her about it. It kills me that I'm starting to hate grayness again._

_She's sitting at the kitchen table, flipping slowly through an old photo album. She's been doing that a lot lately._

_I lean against the doorframe, staring at her back. _

_She hasn't changed much over the years...same face, same smile...same Tifa. Her hair still trails to the small of her back in smooth lines, and her eyes still look like rose pedals._

_And she still has that sixth sense about me, and she proves it again, turning to catch my eyes. She gives a small smile, used to catching me staring at her over the years, and turns back to the album._

_There's a sadness in her eyes. She knows something's wrong even though I've never told her about the grayness. I always figured if a disease presented itself it would be green, like so many other problems in my life. But I can tell it isn't green, it might be a result of the green, but it's gray._

_Thirty five..._

_I walk up behind her, sliding my hand onto her shoulder and looking at the album. I see which one it is...the one that includes our wedding, DG memories, Maria's birth, among other assortments of moments with Marlene and Denzel..._

_Thirty five, and I know she's thinking the same thing._

_Tifa grips my hand hard in hers, tipping her head up to look at me. She smiles, but it doesn't really reach her eyes._

"_Tell me we'll make it to forty."_

_I squeeze her hand. "We'll make it to fifty."_

_A sharp, nervous laugh erupts from her, but it's broken even shorter as Emily bursts into the room, her arms full of boxes and bags._

"_Emily!" Tifa looks up, plastering a quick grin on her face. _

_Luckily Em's too busy trying to get through the door without killing herself to notice the false tinge to it._

"_Hey mom, dad–dad! Dad! Dad!" A box tips forward off the pile, flipping end over end._

_I jerk forward, faster than I should've, and grasp the box just in my finger tips._

_Em smiles. "Thanks, dad."_

"_Ow."_

_Tifa turns back to the album, looking back to herself. "Your back, Cloud," she chides._

"_Yes, dear." I straighten a bit slower, and Em winks at me._

_She deposits the pile on the table beside of Tifa, and Tifa looks at the stuff, prodding it here and there with her fingers._

"_What is all this?" _

"_Decorations," Emily blows her bangs from her eyes, digging through the bags. "Ben's behind me. Zack should be here soon. Aeris will be here in a few hours. She had to finish her dissertation."_

"_That sounds important," I say._

"_It is, dad." Ben comes in the room, carrying more boxes. "Investigating neutron polarizabilities and NN scattering in heavy-baryon chiral perturbation theory."_

"_What in the world does that mean?" Tifa asks._

_Ben shrugs, setting the boxes down. "Dunno...but that's what she kept screaming at me when I called her. It was the only straight answer I got out of her, if you could call it that." Ben glances at Em. "Emi, apparently our sister speaks another language that technically comprises of the language we use." He glances at me. "We got gypped, dad. All the brains wen to Aeris."_

"_Talk to your mother. I didn't contribute to that field."_

_Tifa stands quickly, looking at Ben. "You know perfectly well you could've done something like that, Ben. You're just as smart and capable but you spend all your time riding that stupid motorcycle–_

"_Not this again mom, I'm too old for it–_

"_Exactly. It's time you settled down and got a __**real **__job–_

"_Mom–_

"_And I don't know why you broke up with Liz, she was perfectly nice-_

"_Mom really–_

"_I just worry about you always on the road and doing the stupidest, and most dangerous things ever–_

"_Mom! Look at who you married–_

_And then Tifa grew. She perfected this technique in the years she's been a mother. Even though Ben is a good six inches taller than her, he suddenly seems to shrink in Tifa's 5'4'' stature._

"_Don't you __**dare **__play that card again, young man! I'll have you know that __**that **__one," here she viciously points at me, "Knew when to call, and when to be home when I married him, and he learned that six years earlier than you have apparently so I don't really want to hear it!"_

_Ben sighs, "Sorry mom...I promise I'll call more. I just...I lost my cell phone, and by the time I'd gotten a new one, I broke it..."_

_Tifa shrinks back down. "You __**better **__call more or I'm going to kick the crap out of you, and give your bike to your father."_

"_That doesn't even sound legal mom. I bought and paid for that on my own."_

"_Legal? __**Legal**__? I'm your mother!" She's growing again. "You answer to a higher law...mine!" She picks up a box and thrusts it into Ben's arm. "Now go decorate."_

"_Okay mom."_

"_I love you."_

"_I love you too, mom." _

_Ben moves around her, and out onto the porch._

_Em grins at me._

"_How's Ryan?"_

"_Good...he's sorry he couldn't make it. Business."_

"_Amy happy to tag along?"_

_Em's smile broadens. "You know Amy...as long as she's with her dad she's happy."_

_I nod, glancing over as Tifa walks out. "I better go talk to your brother," I say lowly._

"_Dad...she's looking at albums. What's wrong?"_

"_Ah...it's nothing, Em."_

_Em narrows her eyes. "Dad. Really." I think Tifa passed her sixth sense on to our children._

"_Emily, please. It's nothing. I'm just going to go talk to your brother."_

_Emily tilts her head in a very Tifa way. "You know he didn't take any of that seriously. He saw the album."_

"_Still." She nods her head, and I head out to the back porch._

_Ben is putting up white and gold streamers, and jerks his head at the box when he sees me. "Help."_

"_It's my party."_

_Ben grins, "And if you want it to happen you should help."_

_I shrug, grabbing some streamers, not quite sure where to put them. _

_Ben sighs, shaking his head. "The railing, dad. Loop it around that."_

_I nod my head. "You know your mother just wants you to be happy."_

_Ben snorts. "I know...but it really hasn't been as bad as she's making it out to be. What's wrong, dad?"_

"_Why do you two keep asking that? Nothing's wrong."_

"_She had the albums out–_

"_Can't a woman reminisce? It is our wedding anniversary."_

"_Fine," Ben says curtly. "I'll give you that but–_

"_Why did you break up with Liz?"_

_The sudden topic change catches him off guard, and his throat croaks. _

"_Because," his voice rises several octaves. "Because...it just wasn't..."_

_I glance at him knowingly. "Ben."_

_He meets my eyes briefly. "I know dad. I'll call her tomorrow. I just need...time to cool off." _

"_You can't keep–_

"_Running away. I know, dad. And I haven't been. I really haven't. It gets...tough. She's just like mom. Completely headstrong, and she won't back down at all–_

"_Like you?"_

"_Yea, like me. I'm as stubborn as a fucking mule–_

"_Ben."_

"_Sorry, I stopped by Cid's earlier this week."_

"_It'll work out, son." And I can't help myself. I know he hated it, especially once he hit his teens, but I put my hand on the back of his neck, something I've done since he was kid...every time he fell and scraped his knees, or the first time he got his heart broken. "You've just got to learn to slow down."_

_He nods his head, and I know he's fighting his characteristic shrug out of it, but he doesn't. _

_The door slides open. "Geez you guys are slow," Em says. "Zack's here."_

_I nod, moving inside, leaving Ben alone. As I turn to slide the door shut, I think I see him reach for his phone, but I turn away, facing my youngest son._

_He nods at me, "Dad."_

_It's about all he can do, Tifa is fussing over his face, which has a hasty bandage over the cheekbone._

"_What did you do, Zack? Oh my goodness, have you put anything on this? When did you get this–_

"_Aunt Yuffie didn't warn me about the arrows–_

"_Arrows? Were you in another temple ruin? Haven't you learned? God, I thought the time she forgot to tell you about the falling axes you'd give up on that reliable information. I've told you time and time again that if you're going to search for artifacts, talk to Reeve or Denzel. Much better survival chance."_

_Zack nods. "I'll keep it in mind."_

_Zack barely catches the warning glance from Em before Tifa raises her eyebrows._

"_Excuse me? In mind? I've only–_

"_Sorry, mom. Of course. I'll ask all three of them next time."_

_This promptly shuts up Tifa. "Right. Good. Go help your brother."_

_I suppress a smirk, catching one on Em's face. Zack has always been infinitely better at calming Tifa down than Ben. He seems to know exactly what to say to cut the lecture short._

_As Zack slides the door shut to the porch, I know I hear the words 'The albums, what's wrong?'._

_In a rather short amount of time, the three of them have transformed the house, hanging paper lanterns outside, and lighting candles around the house. People start to trickle in, and our house once again turns into a reunion._

_Last time was a few months ago, under circumstances no one predicted. Barret died, a heart attack. Marlene hasn't been the same since, she seems a bit more hollow, and thin. Denzel's doing his best, and Cara is really the only thing that can bring her out of her reverie. She seems to be doing a bit better, she's smiling. She's laughing, and I can tell from here Denzel is relieved. We hadn't seen or heard from Vincent in nine years. Yuffie keeps tabs on him or so she says. She says she gets letters from him every now and then, but Vincent was always more, well, distant would be a bit underkill. Vincent always shows up when we need him. He actually showed up about a week before Barret's heart attack... said he didn't know why, but apparently he knew._

_Vincent, bringer of death, apparently. I'll keep my eyes on the horizon for him._

_The party is a quiet hum, a sudden burst here and there. Yuffie and Reno arrive, causing a bit more commotion, but not much. I give Reno a curt nod that he returns with about as much enthusiasm as a limp noodle._

_Then the house explodes._

"_I'm here!" Aeris bursts through the door, throwing her arms into the air. A few people scream, Tifa included, and bum rush her, nearly knocking her back out the door._

_Aeris laughs, squeezing between people._

_Ben laughs. "How's the paper?"_

_Aeris beams. "Great! If I don't get an award for that heads are going to roll." _

_Aeris spares a moment to scratch Nanaki behind the ear and share whispered words before squeezing over to me._

"_Hey daddy." She reaches up and hugs me tight._

"_Hi sweetie." _

_She pulls back holding out a bag. "I have a gift! And I __**know**__," she says loudly, over her shoulder. "It's much better than those other heathens."_

_A chorus of boo's erupt from my children, and Aeris sticks her tongue out at them playfully._

"_No, really, dad. I hope you like it."_

_I nod my head. "I know I will."_

_Her eyes narrow knowingly, as if picking up something. "Is everything okay, dad?"_

"_Of course sweetie."_

_She frowns for a moment, her forehead creasing, and then beams. "I'm going to buy a house once I graduate. I've already got five job offers. Reeve's the one I'm seriously considering, but, he's getting old. Maybe he'll __**finally **__retire and leave me in charge."_

_She grins, flitting off into the crowd, and leaves me holding the bag._

_At some point in the night, the alcohol is nearly gone, some of the guests are passed out in various beds and on couches,, the gifts opened, the cake eaten, and my children whispering in a corner about the dreaded picture albums._

_I move outside, trying to get air. There's a couple stragglers out on the porch and they all smile, some a little drunkenly, at me. Music is still trilling softly somewhere from a radio. It carries down to the beach where I walk, seeing her sitting in the sand._

'_Something in your eyes, makes me want to lose myself_

_Makes me want to lose myself, in your arms._

_There's something in your voice, makes my heart beat fast_

_Hope this feeling lasts, the rest of my life._'

_Tifa doesn't look at me as I sit beside of her. The only thing you can see of the ocean is the white froth of the waves. The only reason I can tell where the sky ends, and sea begins, is because there are no stars in the sea._

_I slip my arm around her, and it's only then I notice her shaking slightly. I glance at her as she hastily wipes tears away from her cheeks._

_I don't say anything, but she feels it, the unspoken question._

"_I can't...I don't...I can't __**lose **__you," she says, finally looking at me. "I can't...not after Barret, and...I've always wanted to see more of Vincent, but I know it's stupid but I still know every time I see him my heart is going to jump because I'm going to think I'm going to lose someone...maybe...m-maybe you and I know something is wrong–_

"_Tifa, nothing is wrong."_

"_Don't lie to me Cloud." She sits up on her knees, facing me. "Not now, you can't lie to me."_

"_I would never lie to you."_

"_Even the kids, Cloud, the kids know something is wrong."_

"_Only because you think something is wrong."_

_She grabs my face. "Because there is something wrong."_

_I look away from her out at the ocean, her fingers slipping over my lips softly, and I hear her sort of sob quietly. _

_She forces me to look at her again. "Just...tell me it isn't soon."_

"_Tifa." I look at her. "It isn't soon," I say, because I have no idea how long it is. "I'm not going to leave you. I haven't left you in thirty five years. Why would I now?" She swallows, looking away, and dropping her hands. It's my turn now, so I touch her face, and she looks back at me. "I'm going to be here, until the day you die, and I'll still be here, with you. Even if I die, I'll still be here with you. I could never leave you, Tifa Lockhart."_

_And she smiles, her eyes softer than I've seen them in a long time, even if they are still sad. _

_Then she kisses me, and curls up into my arms, fitting into them the way she always has._

_Perfectly._

'_It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me_

_It feels like I'm all the way back where I come from_

_It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me_

_It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong._'

_And so ends the Diaries of A Broken Man._

_Not the end of the man, however, but of the broken man._

_He isn't really broken anymore._

****

**A/N: **

Behold, the longest Author's note in known history (roughly 1500+ words). Good lord in heaven, I never actually thought that this day would come. When I started Diaries I honestly never expected it get as popular as it did, nor for it go for so many freaking chapters! In fact, diaries started out going in a completely different direction. It was actually going to be centered around drama and another story line. I moved that over into Let It Be though, because it didn't matter what my agenda was when I sat down to write these chapters, some humorous quirk would pop up from my fingers. It was a disease. I couldn't stop it. Still, I booted Let It Be back in August or July, because it wasn't going anywhere and I hated it. I still hate it. I spit on you. Anyways, back to topic, Diaries I never expected to go over maybe twenty or thirty chapters, but once again, every bloody time I sat down to write, these little ideas would come into my head. Like, what if Aerith threw a cake in Cloud's face? Or what if Zack made fun of Cloud in his head? Suddenly this story exploded...I think I may have a cult now O_o.

Still, this story by far is and was the absolute most enjoyable to write. I'm glad everyone loved the sarcastic Cloud. This story had no plan once I scratched Let It Be's plot, I just went with the flow. Every now and then an idea would strike me, and I would write down convo's, or just blurbs to remember it, but other than that, I was winging it with this story pretty much. One chapter that was planned was 42. The Way We Are, just cause I wanted to give back to you guys, and these two finally needed to take a big step. I had not planned _at all_ to have Cloud propose so quickly afterwards. I had no idea at the time when he was going to, or how he was going to, I just knew eventually he was going to. Then, 44. Wait For Me came, and I just wrote, and well, that was the result. I didn't know till I was about halfway through the chapter that Cloud was going to propose. It was enthralling.

I knew since from about chapter 50 or so when people began to speak about this story ending that I needed to think of a time, and a way to end it. I decided off the bat that marriage and babies wasn't something I wanted to write about, really. I know I could've probably put Cloud through hell with that, but it wasn't about that. I haven't experienced marriage (And it certainly isn't in the near future) so I didn't want to get something wrong. Ending it with their wedding just seemed right, because I started it with them dating. Then, I decided that I wanted an epilogue from the POV of every AVALANCHE member. Those were a _lot_ of fun to write. Originally I was going to steer clear of DoC, but this gave me a new opportunity; thus Cid's rambunctious ranting(this way it could fit w/ cannon, I suppose...hint hint squeenix, this totally needs to be considered apart of the FFVII compilation XD). I know some of the timing may be a bit off, but I kept it as close as possible.

It took me a really long time, seriously down to the last minute to figure out when and what Cloud was going to say. But that's how Cloud always is, I never know what I'm going to write him doing until I sit down and pound it out. I think that's one of the reasons why I love Cloud's last bit; I don't know why it became a little more, I guess dramatic...I mean, he's an older man, with children, and he's lived a full and satisfying life. That was the main thing to show...so I hope you guys don't hate me for taking the normal antics of Diaries sort of out of the ending...with no slapstick comedy or anything, but this isn't about slapstick comedy (although it DOES have a large part in it) it's about Cloud and Tifa, and their love. So I hope you like this.

Originally Cloud and Tifa were going to have the last two epilogues, but I really wanted Tifa to have the epilogue showing Cloud's dream actually happening...that and I had no clue where to put Red. He found his way with little Aeris. I thought it fit pretty well. Why didn't I keep the spellings the same? I dunno, I think over a while the spelling Aeris has grown on me tremendously. Don't ask, don't know why.

Some of this story is taken from real life experiences, not a lot but some.

Chapter 24. Exploding Banana was actually something my sister did. With a few of her friends, she went to a guy's house that had wronged her and stuck the firecracker in the banana, and put it in his mailbox and lit it. I never heard anything about it after that, but I thought it was pretty original. I hope she got the right mailbox.

Pen Pen in chapter 32. was a reference to my stuffed animal. I have a Patch from 101 Dalmatians my aunt gave me when I was four or five. My sister used to make fun of it because his head started falling off. Don't worry, I sewed his head back on when I was eleven, and he has been intact ever since. Here's to you, Patch, here's to you.

Chapter 33. Pity the lame chocobo was an experience I went through just before Christmas of 2006. Like literally just before Christmas. I ate Chinese food, and got food poisoning or something. I spent every two hours beside the toilet for nearly a day. I fainted once, too. It was painful. I was pissed off mostly because I couldn't enjoy the Christmas feast that much. I was still bitter, and was anxiously waiting for this past year's feast. I made up for it.

Chapter 37. Who loves the World's bitch? Was sort of a tribute to me. I am often the world's bitch. The world hates me. I have come to this conclusion, so I made the world hate Cloud too. It's a love hate relationship, me and him. He only loves me cause I hooked him up with Tifa, but he hates me cause of all the shit I put him through to get to that.

Chapter 40. It's a Skilt was inspired by one of my friend's from high school. He was hot, and he wore kilts. End of story. Cloud needs to wear kilts. Sexy.

Chapter 48. Was a testament to my love for orange sherbert ice cream (ice cream in general is my love), ice cream cakes, whisky, and musicals. I'm easily pleased. Also Cloud's rant in the beginning was once again his reference to being the world's bitch, and coincidentally me being the world's bitch.

Chapter 51. Reverse! Reverse! Was an actual haircut me and my bud discussed. We're crazy. If you're wondering who's talking about Hon Solo in my profile, that's me and him. We're easily entertained.

Epilogue Part B: We call one of our friend's Foofie, but that's because of his curly hair XD

Epilogue Part N. My Grandma told me I was a surprise when I was four or five. I didn't understand it then, but when I got older, I asked my mom "So I wasn't wanted?" She said "We didn't know we wanted you until we had you." Then she fussed at my Grandma. My Grandma vehemently denies ever telling me that...liar. XD

I can never thank all of you enough, I seriously can't. Without you guys, this story would've never gotten as big as it did, so that's why I thank you the readers, the reviewers, the favers, and the alerters for everything you've done. You've made my day, and I hope you continue to read my fics and enjoy this. I hope you enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it.

To anyone who reads this after the story is completed, I want to thank you as well. I'm honored, and flattered that I got so many reviews, and so many faves and alerts.

The view count for the chapters was pretty consistent...though there was a bit of influxes every couple chapters... Chapter 25, for instance (LMAO I seriously think that's the chapter that put this story on the spot) 42 and 44 were a bit more up, but only about 750 for each... Chapter 25 had over 1000 more views than the chapter previous.

I'm sorry I haven't been updating as much lately. I've just graduated from college and am on the job hunt, but I hope this makes up for it.

Huggles for all mah darlings! I love you!

Thank you

once again for making this story so big and so popular, and bringing attention to my name. I do hope one day to publish an original story; I'm working on one right now, and without writing fanfiction I definitely wouldn't have the writing skills that I have now.

Parting is such sweet sorrow, but don't worry, you haven't seen the last of Horky.

Till next time, loves.


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